Note to Self
Clean Spill Lyrics
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The passage of the road I took
'Cause I'm a mess
And now I'm home, I'm all alone
And then I heard a ring, pick up the phone
It's a waste of time
And after all, you're still a friend
The years, they go and come again
Punched right below the chin
I'll be in my room
Probably goin' insane
I don't need it anymore
The blood running down my back
You act like I need this in
I wish that I could relate
To the things that you would say
This is just a note to self
So leave it here beside the shelf
My hands are tied
And after all, you're still a friend
The years, they go and come again
Punched below the chin
I'll be in my room
Probably goin' insane
I don't need it anymore
The blood running down my back
You act like I need this in
I'll be in my room
Probably goin' insane
I think she wants me
But she don't even know my name
I'll be in my room
Probably goin' insane
I don't need it anymore
The blood running down my back
You act like I need this in
In "Note to Self" by Clean Spill, the singer addresses feelings of overwhelm and frustration in life, and the desire to break free from a situation that is causing distress. The lyrics suggest that the singer is reflecting on their life, perhaps feeling as though they have taken the wrong path and questioning the choices they have made. They describe feeling like a mess and overlooking the road they have taken. The ringing phone is seen as a waste of time, suggesting that the person on the other end of the line is not someone the singer wants to talk to or does not have the answers they seek.
The song then describes the passage of time, with the years going and coming again, as everything around the singer changes but they seem to feel stuck in their struggling state. They reference being punched below the chin, suggesting that they have been hit hard by life and are still reeling from the blow. The singer then indicates that they will go and hide in their room, perhaps feeling overwhelmed or even crazy. They declare that they do not need the situation anymore, seemingly choosing to remove themselves from whatever it is that is causing them stress.
Throughout the song, the singer repeats the phrase "I'll be in my room, probably goin' insane," emphasizing the feeling of being trapped and lost in their own thoughts. The singer ends the song with the repeated line "The blood running down my back, you act like I need this in," perhaps indicating that they feel like others are not understanding their pain or are making things worse. Overall, "Note to Self" seems to be a reflection on the difficulties of navigating life and trying to find a way to cope with overwhelming emotions.
Line by Line Meaning
Feel as if I overlook
I feel like I'm not fully present, like I'm missing something
The passage of the road I took
I'm not paying attention to the journey, only the destination
'Cause I'm a mess
I'm not in a good place mentally or emotionally
And now I'm home, I'm all alone
Now that I'm by myself, my thoughts are overwhelming
And then I heard a ring, pick up the phone
Someone is trying to reach out to me, but I don't want to deal with it
It's a waste of time
I don't see the point in continuing this conversation
And after all, you're still a friend
Despite our differences, we still have a connection
The years, they go and come again
Time passes and things change, but some things remain the same
Punched right below the chin
Life keeps knocking me down, but I keep getting back up
I'll be in my room
I need to be alone to process my thoughts and emotions
Probably goin' insane
It feels like my mind is unraveling
I don't need it anymore
I'm over this situation and ready to move on
The blood running down my back
Metaphor for the pain and stress I'm experiencing
You act like I need this in
Others are trying to bring me down or cause more drama in my life
I wish that I could relate
I want to understand where you're coming from, but I don't
To the things that you would say
I can't connect with your point of view or your experience
This is just a note to self
I'm writing this down to remind myself of my thoughts and emotions
So leave it here beside the shelf
I'm leaving this note here to come back to later
My hands are tied
I'm stuck in this situation and can't do anything about it
I think she wants me
I'm getting signals that someone is interested in me
But she don't even know my name
She doesn't know the real me, just a version I put out there
Contributed by Alex V. Suggest a correction in the comments below.