Boombox
The Lonely Island Lyrics

Imagine in your mind a posh country club
Envision an exclusive club for wealthy snobs

The stuffy old money where the poor gets snubbed
Where rich elites snobbishly ignore the less fortunate

The spread is bland sauerkraut and boiled goose
The lackluster menu serves unappetizing food

There's no way these people will ever cut loose
The wealthy patrons won't let their guard down and have fun

But then I walk in the room, hold my boombox high
The artist enters with a boombox held high

And what happened next, will blow your mind
What follows is truly unexpected

Everything got outta control
The situation became wild and crazy

The music was so undressing
The arousing music had a seductive effect

Everyone got out on the floor
All the stuffy patrons started dancing

It was a bunch of old white people dancing
The scene had elderly, Caucasian dancers

Now picture if you will a bunch of business men
Imagine a group of corporate businessmen

Stuffed in the boardroom like pigs in a pen
Crammed into a meeting room like animals

The ties around the necks are like a hangman's noose
Their clothing accessories feel like execution instruments

In the middle of the table there's a boiled goose
The centerpiece food item is boiled goose

The old people smell makes you want to puke in the sink
The stench of elderly people is revolting

These dudes will never dance yeah that's what you think
Don't assume these men won't dance

I stride in the room all young and hip
The artist enters with youthful confidence

Hold up my boombox and say listen to this
Raises the boombox to play music

Then everyone started to move
The businessmen started dancing too

People rejoiced instead of financing
Instead of working, everyone was dancing

Your preconceived notions were shattered
The stereotypical thinking was proven wrong

By the super old white people dancing
Even the elderly patrons got down to the music

The big apple, where people never dance
New York City is notorious for not dancing

Spirits go down while profits expand
People feel depressed while businesses flourish

The cops or the dealers who's got the juice
Is law enforcement or criminals in control?

The street benders peddling their boiled goose
Vendors selling boiled goose on the street

So many types of people will never get along
There are groups of people who will never agree

Till I bust out my boombox and play this song
The artist will play a song to unite everyone

The music washed away all the hate
The power of music eliminated hostility

And society started advancing
Society became more progressive

Every demographic was represented
People from all walks of life joined in

It was a rainbow coalition of dancing
A diverse community of dancers

Everyone was wearing fingerless gloves
Dancers wearing fingerless gloves

I saw a Spanish guy doing the Bartman
A Spanish man doing the Bartman dance

Transport now to an old folks home
Imagine a retirement home

Where the elderly are tossed on their brittle bones
Where frail seniors are neglected

The orderlies are stealing there's no excuse
The staff is stealing without justification

Everyday for lunch they eat boiled goose
Boiled goose is served daily for lunch

So I grabbed my boombox and hit the turbo base
The singer turns up the bass on the boombox

And what happened next was a total disgrace
What followed was inappropriate

Everybody started having sex
The music led to an orgy

The music was way too powerful
The music had a strong effect on the seniors

A bunch of old people fucking like rabbits
Elderly people engaging in sexual activity

It was disgusting to say the least
It was gross and inappropriate

A boombox can change the world
Music has the power to transform society

You gotta know your limits with a boombox
Use music responsibly

This was a cautionary tale
The story serves as a warning

A boombox is not a toy
Do not treat a boombox as a trivial item