Everyday Normal Guy 2
Jon Lajoie Lyrics

You want some more of this, bitch?
Do you want me to continue with my regular, mundane life?

Back in the heezy
In the past

We could do this all year long
I can talk about my ordinary life forever

(I'm just a regular everyday normal motherfucker)
I am an average person

I told you in the first song, I'll tell you in another
I already stated that I'm just a normal person and I'll keep reiterating

I don't have a girlfriend, my hand's my only lover
I am single, and my only affection is from myself

One night a week my mom likes to cook me supper
My mother and I have dinner together once a week

And Michael Keaton was my favorite Batman
Out of all the Batman actors, I preferred Michael Keaton

I was walking down the street just the other day
I was casually strolling outside recently

I saw these two fine bitches, they were walking my way
Two attractive women were walking towards me

"Yo, what you girls doing tonight?" is what I wanted to say
I was considering asking the women about their evening plans

But suddenly I panicked, my voice started to shake
I became nervous and scared

So I put my head down, and I just walked away
I left without talking to them

I had a bus to catch anyway, it worked out great
Leaving without talking to them ended up fine because I had to catch a bus

Got on the bus, put my headphones on, and pressed play
I boarded the bus and played music in my headphones

Sheryl Crow, James Blunt, and motherfucking Ace of Bass
I listen to a variety of music genres

Yo, what can I say? It's just a day in my life
Nothing special is happening, just another average day

I'm up early in the morning, in bed early at night
I wake up early and go to bed early

To be productive at work, I got to be well rested
I need to be well-rested to be productive at work

Yeah, motherfucker, you heard what I just said
That's what I meant, no need to clarify

I don't like margarine, I much prefer the taste of butter
I prefer the taste of butter over margarine

My favorite movies as a kid were Superman and Ghostbusters
As a child, I enjoyed watching Superman and Ghostbusters movies

I have a hard time opening my eyes underwater
I struggle to open my eyes while submerged

And I'm not a huge Nicholas Cage fan
I am not a big fan of Nicholas Cage

I'm from a lower-middle class family
I grew up in a lower-middle class family

Me and my brothers and sisters played hide-and-seek
My siblings and I played a childhood game called hide-and-seek

I have good memories from my childhood, bitch
I have fond memories of my childhood

My favorite toy was my fucking firetruck, bitch
I enjoyed playing with my toy firetruck

I used to play with that motherfucker all day long
I would play with the firetruck throughout the day

Until I learned about sex from the Sears catalog
I discovered sex from looking at the Sears catalog

And then I played with my motherfucker all day long
Then, I began masturbating a lot

About ten times a day, man, all year long
I masturbate frequently

My favorite song, motherfucker, I don't like to admit it
I am hesitant to reveal my favorite song

Is a Celine Dion Song from the movie Titanic
My favorite song is "My Heart Will Go On" from the movie Titanic

Every night in my dreams, I see you, I feel you
I relate to the lyrics in the song

Every time I hear that fucking shit, a tear comes to my eye
I become emotional when listening to the song

Why the fuck did Leonardo DiCaprio have to die
I am upset about the character's death

Yo, I'm not afraid to say that I'm a sensitive guy
I am comfortable expressing my emotions

Sticks and stones break my bones, but it's the words that make me cry
Physical pain doesn't hurt me as much as emotional pain

Like that time in grade three, when a girl called me Stupid Face
I was called a negative name by a girl in the third grade

She really hurt me, why'd she call me Stupid Face?
Her words affected me emotionally

Is my face stupid? How's that even possible?
I question how a face could be stupid

A person could be stupid, but a face? That's impossible
I am using sarcasm to express that a face cannot be stupid

Shit happens all the time, and you learn how to deal with it
Life has unpleasant events, and you learn how to cope

Regular everyday normal fucking bullshit
Life can be mundane and disappointing

When I get into a fight, I usually leave on a stretcher
I am not good at fighting, and usually come out injured

When I got nothing to say, I usually talk about the weather
I often change the subject to talking about the weather when I have nothing to say

I like the first Back To The Future, but the second one was better
I preferred the second Back to the Future movie to the first

I like red peppers better than the green ones
I prefer the taste of red peppers over green peppers

Ooh-hoo, saving up my money to go buy a new dishwasher
I am saving my money to buy a new dishwasher

Mine broke about six months ago, motherfucker
My dishwasher stopped working six months ago

Go, go, go, go, go shawty
Encouragement to someone to go and have fun

It's your birthday
It's your special day

Go party like it's your birthday
Celebrate your birthday

I wasn't invited, but it's okay
I wasn't invited to the birthday party

I'll just stay at home and play some video games
I will spend my time playing video games at home