Devastation and Reform
Relient K Lyrics

Fear can drive stick
Being overwhelmed by fear can take over and drive one’s actions like an automatic car.

And it's taking me down this road
This fear is leading me down a path that I never thought I would go down.

A road down which I swore I'd never go
I promised myself that I would never find myself in this situation.

And here I sit
I feel stuck and don’t know what to do.

Thinking of God knows what
My thoughts are scattered and I don’t even know what I’m thinking about.

Afraid to admit
I am too scared to confess something to myself or to others.

I might self-destruct
I have the possibility of spiraling down and causing harm to myself.

So lock the windows
I am trying to prevent any external factors that would increase my anxiety and fear.

And bolt the door
I am attempting to protect myself by locking out any additional problems or dangers.

Cuz I've got enough problems
I am struggling with enough issues and don’t need any more to deal with.

Without creating more
I don’t want to add anything to my plate that would cause more stress or problems.

I feel like I was born
It feels like it has been a part of me for a long time and a part of who I am.

To devastation and reform
I’ve always been able to destroy things I love and rebuild them.

Destroying everything I loved
I am causing destruction to things that mean a lot to me.

And the worst part is
The hardest part about all of it is...

I pull my heart out, reconstruct
I take something I deeply care about and try to put it back together, even if it’s not the same as before.

And in the end it's nothing but
But ultimately it’s nothing except...

The shell of what I had when I first started
It’s just an empty representation of what once existed.

Usually I'll cause my own first hit
I tend to be the one that causes the first instance of pain or damage.

It seems to me to be slightly masochistic
It appears to me like I enjoy inflicting pain on myself.

But there'd be no story
But if there was no conflict...

Without all this descension
If there were no obstacles or destruction.

So I inflict the conflict
So I do the damage myself in order to build myself up again.

With the utmost of contemption
I have a strong disdain for it but do it anyway.

Thank you God
I am grateful to a higher power.

For giving me the insight
For helping me find an answer in a difficult situation.

So I might make
So that I have the chance to fix what went wrong.

These wrongs right
To correct my mistakes.

If and when
If and when this situation arises again.

There ever is a next time
In case something like this happens again.

Cuz failure is a blessing in disguise
Failing can sometimes lead to a greater lesson or realization.

Pull my heart out, reconstruct
I take my emotions to the extreme, trying to fix what I broke.

And in the end it's nothing but
But ultimately it’s just...

The shell of what I had when I first started
A shadow of what it once was.

I feel like I was born
It feels as though this is a fundamental part of who I am.

To devastation and reform
To destroying and rebuilding.

Destroying everything I loved
Tearing apart relationships and things that matter most to me.

And the worst part is
The hardest part...

I pull my heart out, reconstruct
I expose my emotions and try to repair them.

And in the end it's nothing but
But in the end it’s just...

The shell of what I had when I first started
A hollow representation of what used to exist.