The music of $uicideBoy$ varies between different sub-genres of rap; while some songs have melancholy tones with lyrical content that focuses on subjects such as depression and suicidal ideation (topics not widely exposed in rap music), others are wildly aggressive, with themes of violence and sexual content. Some of their music is based around life growing up in New Orleans; song titles such as Audubon, Tulane, Elysian Fields and St. Bernard reflect streets and neighborhoods that influenced the life of Arceneaux and Petrou. A large portion of their music focuses on depression and its symptoms, an angle not often received in mainstream hip hop; Arceneaux elaborated on this in an interview with Mass Appeal, stating, “A lot of people take it as emo, or depressed music, or negative music... it’s really just connecting. It’s therapy, through music". Excluding occasional guest producers, the entirety of Suicideboys' discography is self-produced, mainly by Arceneaux under his pseudonym Budd Dwyer (an homage to the former politician of the same name).
$crim was born Scott Arceneaux Jr. on April 11, 1989 in Marrero, Louisiana. Arceneaux originally was inspired by T-Pain and Kanye West to produce music, buying his first laptop which he used to start DJing with money gained from selling drugs. Arceneaux's passion for DJing extended when he started to attend Delgado Community College, where he was hired to DJ parties. He also worked selling used furniture, getting fired for his new hand tattoos after three years.
Ruby da Cherry was born Aristos Petrou (Αρίστος Πέτρου) on April 22, 1990 to an American mother and Greek Cypriot father. Raised in Metairie, Louisiana, Petrou's interest in music began when he was seven, playing violin and then drums when he was ten, eventually joining bands in middle school. He worked at his father's restaurant as a waiter, a job he held until 2015. His experience with the punk rock scene continued as he joined the band Vapo-Rats as its drummer; however, disillusioned with the apathy his bandmates showed towards the future of the band, Petrou left in order to pursue a career in hip-hop with Arceneaux.
Arceneaux and Petrou are cousins, and as such shared a close relationship growing up. Realising that both were interested in taking a musical career seriously, and both dissatisfied with the direction of their lives, the two formed Suicideboys, making a pact that if their musical career didn’t work out, they would both commit suicide. Elaborating on this in an interview with Mass Appeal, Arceneaux states that, “it was pretty much like cutting the hand, bleeding, and making a pact that there’s no plan B, that if this doesn’t happen by the time we’re 30, I’m blowing my head off”.
The duo's first project together, a three-track EP named Kill Yourself Part I: The $uicide $aga, was released in June 2014 on SoundCloud and Bandcamp, attracting attention for their collaboration with notable underground rapper Bones. In the following months, the duo released a further nine iterations of the Kill Yourself series. After a number of collaboration EPs with fellow underground artist Black Smurf, their first full length project titled Gray/Grey was released on March 3, 2015.
Suicideboys' underground breakthrough came with the release of 2015 EP $outh $ide $uicide, a collaboration with established South Florida rapper Pouya, which thrust the duo into the underground rap spotlight. Other 2015 releases include 7th or St. Tammany, YUNGDEATHLILLIFE, High Tide in the Snake's Nest, Grey Sheep EP, I No Longer Fear The Razor Guarding My Heel (part I and II), My Liver Will Handle What My Heart Can't, Now The Moon's Rising and G.R.E.Y.G.O.D.S. with fellow g59 rapper RAMIREZ.
The duo's first foray onto the mainstream musical charts came with the release of Radical $uicide in the summer of 2016. The five-track EP, produced by EDM musician Getter, peaked at number 17 on the Billboard Rap charts. Other 2016 releases include Dark Side of the Clouds, Grey Sheep II, Eternal Grey, I No Longer Fear The Razor Guarding My Heel (part III), G.R.E.Y.G.O.D.S.I.I. with [artis]RAMIREZ, DIRTYNASTY$UICIDE with GERM, and Black $uicide Side C with Black Smurf.
In 2017 the boys released another 10 iterations of the Kill Yourself series, they also dropped DIRTIERNASTIER$UICIDE, with GERM.
On September 7, 2018, their debut studio album I Want to Die in New Orleans was released. A statement posted by the duo's official Instagram account stated, "We started recording this album in the beginning of 2017. Initially we wanted to write about our experiences on the road and express how our lives had become slightly more extravagant."
In late 2018, a rumor arose that the group had broken up following a series of ominous tweets. However, they soon clarified that the tweets were in relation to "personal issues" facing Arceneaux, and that they had in fact not broken up.
...And To Those I Love Thanks For Sticking Around
$uicideboy$ Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Take me home
It's the one place I can rest in peace
Turn off my phone
So many messages I wish I could just delete
Questioning my existence
Questioning my decisions
Burning down all the bridges
Now I'm finished
Sorry don't want you to visit, no, no
One last pic and I'll be gone
Make it count
Put the flash on
Never really felt like I belonged
So I'll be on my way
And I won't be long
I'll be dead by dawn
I'll be dead by dawn
I'll be dead by dawn
I'll be dead by dawn
(By dawn, by dawn, by dawn)
(By dawn, by dawn, by dawn)
(By dawn, by dawn, by dawn)
(By dawn, by dawn, by dawn)
(By dawn, by dawn, by dawn, by dawn)
Scrolling through my texts
Shit I left unread
Never tryna deal with it
There's bliss up in my ignorance
Ten dope dealers (dealers)
Ex want me to see her (see her)
Can't trust her
Don't believe her
Reply turn into a needle, yeah
Don't wanna do it again (do it again)
Got shit I'm not tryna relive (tryna relive)
Head fucked up and I'm sick
These old habits will kill me quick
Quicker than I can blink (blink, blink)
Quicker than I can think (think, think)
Lift me up
Don't want sink
Pour me up
I need a drink
What the fuck do I do, when sabotage is all I know?
Oh, I done dug myself my own grave in this hole, oh no, whoa, whoa
Kill me slow, slow
Curtains close slow
Fuck, I don't see what's the point of going, no no
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
(No, no)
The lyrics of $uicideboy$'s "And To Those I Love Thanks For Sticking Around" depict the struggles and inner turmoil of the artist. The song offers a glimpse into the mind of someone who is tired and drained. The artist wishes to go home, to a place where they can finally rest in peace. They're questioning their existence and the decisions they've made in the past, which have led them to burn down all the bridges they've built. They now want to dig a moat between themself and the rest of the world, wishing to sever ties with those around them.
The second verse of the song talks about the artist's struggle with addiction, and their reluctance to deal with the problems in their life. They're overwhelmed with anxiety and depression, and their old habits are haunting them, taking them back to a darker place. They're trapped in a cycle of self-sabotage, unable to see a way out. The artist wishes for someone to lift them up, to pour them a drink, but ultimately they feel lost and see no point in carrying on with life.
The song is a dark and emotional conversation between the artist and themselves. It's a reflection of their mental state and offers a glimpse into their struggles with addiction and depression. The lyrics are powerful and evoke a sense of sadness and helplessness. It's a reminder that even the strongest of us can struggle and need help.
Line by Line Meaning
Take me home
I want to go back to the place where I feel most at peace.
It's the one place I can rest in peace
I feel most comfortable and at ease in my own home.
Turn off my phone
I don't want to be bothered by anyone or anything.
So many messages I wish I could just delete
I am overwhelmed and frustrated by the amount of communication and contact I receive.
Questioning my existence
I am unsure of my place and purpose in the world.
Questioning my decisions
I am uncertain about the choices I have made in my life.
Burning down all the bridges
I am intentionally cutting off all ties and connections with others.
Dig a moat
I am creating a barrier to keep others out and protect myself.
Now I'm finished
I have reached my breaking point and can no longer continue.
Sorry don't want you to visit, no, no
I don't want anyone to come and see me in this state.
One last pic and I'll be gone
I am taking a final photo before ending my life.
Make it count
I want this final photo to be meaningful and significant.
Put the flash on
I want to capture this final moment in as much detail as possible.
Never really felt like I belonged
I have always felt like an outsider and never truly fit in.
So I'll be on my way
I am leaving this world behind.
And I won't be long
I know my time is limited and my end is near.
I'll be dead by dawn
I know I will not survive until morning.
Scrolling through my texts
I am looking at the messages I have received from others.
Shit I left unread
I have not read or responded to these messages, avoiding confrontation or ignorance.
Never tryna deal with it
I am avoiding dealing with my problems and emotions.
There's bliss up in my ignorance
I find temporary comfort in pretending that everything is okay.
Ten dope dealers (dealers)
I have had dealings with drug dealers.
Ex want me to see her (see her)
My ex-girlfriend wants to see me again, but I am conflicted and unsure.
Can't trust her
I do not trust her and do not want to be hurt again.
Don't believe her
I doubt the sincerity of her intentions and feelings.
Reply turn into a needle, yeah
My response to her could lead me back into drug use.
Don't wanna do it again (do it again)
I do not want to fall back into old habits or addiction.
Got shit I'm not tryna relive (tryna relive)
I have been through difficult experiences that I do not want to repeat or remember.
Head fucked up and I'm sick
I am mentally and emotionally unwell, struggling with my feelings and well-being.
These old habits will kill me quick
I know that, if I continue to engage in destructive behavior or substances, my life will be cut short.
Quicker than I can blink (blink, blink)
My life could end in an instant, without warning or notice.
Quicker than I can think (think, think)
My life could end before I have a chance to fully process my situation or emotions.
Lift me up
I am asking for help and support from those around me.
Don't want sink
I want to avoid falling deeper into despair and struggles.
Pour me up
I am seeking temporary relief or escape through drugs or alcohol.
I need a drink
I am seeking temporary relief or escape through alcohol specifically.
What the fuck do I do, when sabotage is all I know?
I am struggling to break free from a pattern of self-destructive behavior.
Oh, I done dug myself my own grave in this hole, oh no, whoa, whoa
I have created my own problems and struggles and feel trapped in them.
Kill me slow, slow
My life feels like a slow and painful death.
Curtains close slow
My life is coming to an end, and it feels like a slow and drawn-out process.
Fuck, I don't see what's the point of going, no no
I do not see a reason to continue living and feel hopeless and lost.
Lyrics © Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.
Written by: Aristos Petrou, Scott Arcenaux
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
@tay7063
Things to live for:
Life itself.
Those late night walks.
Falling in love.
Bonding with friends.
Late night drives.
Walks on the beach.
Nature.
Everyone you love.
Music.
New friends.
Seeing someone you love smiling.
Being actually happy.
Feeling safe.
Tears of joy.
Christmas.
Family gatherings.
Being warm.
Hugs from people you love.
And many more.
Stay in this gorgeous world.
This is very emotional for me to write. I am suicidal myself. I have many problems but i decide to help others instead which i know is a bad habit.
Thank you for reading :) "Dont worry be happy"
@acunt
Ruby really got me shouting "I'll be dead by dawn" on Valentine's day, huh.
@ishkodethepoet265
this song gives me bliss
@SloRush
Literally me
@woariir5162
Same, speaker volume up, just singing with Ruby.
@grimyboyp3549
Lmaooo ikr I shout this shit with pride
@i_never_heard_of_you7144
I remember
@phoenixwells1011
shit goes so hard youtube doesn't even want me to listen to it.
@Sikdo
ong bro this song slaps so hard they made me sogn a waver
@woofydoggie4921
Did you eat your vegetable?
@Devv011
Dey took put da restrictions 💀