Mami Kawada (川田まみ), born on February 13, in Sapporo, Hokkaido Prefecture, J… Read Full Bio ↴Mami Kawada (川田まみ), born on February 13, in Sapporo, Hokkaido Prefecture, Japan, is a former J-Pop singer signed to Geneon Entertainment Inc. Her vocal talent was first discovered by Eiko Shimamiya (島みやえい子), who was her teacher at vocal school in Sapporo, Hokkaido. She was then introduced to "I've Sound," a music production group. Where Kawada became attached to Shimamiya.

As a member of I've Sound, she performed many songs which were included as theme songs of TV anime series and videogames. Mami was usually paired up with co-I've member Kotoko when making soundtracks for anime. Examples of these are Onegai Teacher, Onegai Twins, Starship Operators, Shakugan no Shana, Baldr Force EXE Resolution OVA, and Hayate no Gotoku wherein Kotoko will perform the opening theme while Mami will perform the ending theme or vice versa. In 2002, she and Shimamiya grouped themselves as the band "Healing Leaf" and performed some theme songs for visual novel games, but only one song was featured in the I've Girls Compilation, "Ame ni Utau Ballad" (雨に歌う譚詩曲).

Her debut single, "Radiance", released on February 23, 2005, was used as an opening theme for the anime Starship Operators. Her most successful single was "Joint," released on October 31, 2007, and used as the first opening theme for the sequel of the anime series Shakugan no Shana, Shakugan no Shana II. In autumn 2008, Mami Kawada also established her official website together with her official fan club "M.A.L.L.", which stands for "Mami Artist Lasting Live."

Her debut album, "SEED" was released on March 29, 2006 and reached #12 in the Oricon weekly charts, charting for five weeks selling over 25,000 units. Her second album, "SAVIA" was released on March 26, 2008. However, it didn't do well in the Oricon weekly charts (#15) but after less than six months, she had her second live tour for her second album. Her third album, "LINKAGE" was released on March 24, 2010 and ranked #26 in the Oricon weekly charts.

On January 24th, 2016, Kawada announced that she would be retiring from music. Her final concert was held on May 21st, 2016.

On February 3rd, 2018, it was revealed that Kawada had gotten married to I've composer/arranger Tomoyuki Nakazawa, and had given birth to a child during the two years since her retirement.

Going back to square one
川田まみ Lyrics

Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴

敵わないと目を伏せた
右のほっぺたをつねって
作った笑顔振りまいても
プツリと切れた conviction
目覚めたって変わらないさ
消し去りたいのに
消さないプライド
消せないあの冴えたイメージで

Going back to square one
ルーレットに集まった目
5マス進んで手に入れたmoney
ゴール寸前一発逆転狙って失った
stepping back
またここへやってきた
wander about
またゲームは始まった
笑えないと立ち去った
ムキになってカラまわって
今更戻れるわけないけど
リリリと鳴った incoming call
眠ったって終わらないさ
本当だからよりくだらない激怒
くだらない冗談にしたいのに
Going back to square one
ルーレットに託された目
5マス進んで 2マス戻され
ゴールなんて
一生叶わないような気がしたんだ
stepping back
またここへやってきた
wander about
またゲームは始まった

ゴメンねも言えないまま
帰るなんてココしかなくて
温もり部屋も暖かいから
ポロリと泣けた I'm home
ルーレットに集まった目
5マス進んで手に入れたmoney
ゴール寸前一発逆転狙って失った
stepping back
またここへやってきた
wander about
またゲームは始まった
stepping back また頭抱えて
wander about ただ過ぎた日々

any number of times
またここへやってきた

Overall Meaning

The song "Going back to square one" by 川田まみ is a poignant ballad about the struggles we face in life, and the way we often find ourselves returning to familiar places, both physically and mentally. The lyrics explore the idea of trying and failing, of losing our way and being forced to start over again, and the frustration and sadness that can accompany those experiences.

The opening lines of the song set the tone for this theme, as the singer admits that she sometimes feels like she can't measure up to the challenges she faces in life, and is forced to look away in defeat. The following lines suggest that even when she tries to put on a happy face and keep moving forward, her confidence and sense of purpose can falter, leaving her feeling lost and disconnected. The chorus reinforces this idea, with the singer repeating the phrase "Going back to square one" as if resigned to the fact that no matter how hard she tries, she can't seem to break free of the cycle of struggle and setback.

Throughout the song, the imagery of a game or a gamble is used to suggest the idea that life is unpredictable and often beyond our control. The image of a roulette wheel is particularly potent, with the singer describing how she has placed her bets and watched as she has both won and lost, only to find herself back where she started, trying again. The overall effect is one of melancholy, as the singer acknowledges the difficulty of life while still holding out hope for a better future.

Line by Line Meaning

敵わないと目を伏せた
I lowered my eyes believing I couldn't win

右のほっぺたをつねって
I pinched my right cheek

作った笑顔振りまいても
Even though I tried to put on a smile

プツリと切れた conviction
My conviction suddenly broke

目覚めたって変わらないさ
Even if I wake up, nothing will change

消し去りたいのに消さないプライド消せないあの冴えたイメージで
I want to erase it but I can't, my pride and that sharp image of myself won't vanish

Going back to square one
Starting over from the beginning

ルーレットに集まった目5マス進んで手に入れたmoney
Gathering my sights on the roulette, I advanced 5 spaces and won some money

ゴール寸前一発逆転狙って失った stepping back
Right before achieving victory, I aimed for a comeback but ended up stepping back

またここへやってきた wander about
I came back here again and wandered around

笑えないと立ち去った
I couldn't laugh and left

ムキになってカラまわって
I stubbornly spun around

今更戻れるわけないけど
I can't turn back time now

リリリと鳴った incoming call
The incoming call rang loudly

眠ったって終わらないさ
Even if I go to sleep, it won't end

本当だからよりくだらない激怒
It angers me more because it's true

くだらない冗談にしたいのに
Even though I want to make a silly joke

ルーレットに託された目5マス進んで 2マス戻されゴールなんて一生叶わないような気がしたんだ
Entrusting my gaze on the roulette, I advanced 5 spaces and was set back by 2, making me feel like I'll never reach the goal

ゴメンねも言えないまま帰るなんてココしかなくて温もり部屋も暖かいからポロリと泣けた I'm home
Unable to even say a sorry, I had nowhere else to go but home where the warmth of the room made me cry, saying 'I'm home'

stepping back またここへやってきた
Stepping back, I came back here again

wander about またゲームは始まった
Wandering around, the game started again

stepping back また頭抱えて
Stepping back, I held my head again

wander about ただ過ぎた日々
Wandering about, I recalled those days that just went by

any number of timesまたここへやってきた
I came back here any number of times

Lyrics © O/B/O APRA AMCOS
Written by: まみ川田

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind

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