Jezebel
10000 Maniacs Lyrics
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To know I was carefully building the mask I was wearing for two years, swearing I'd tear it off.
I've sat in the dark explaining to myself that I'm straining too hard for feelings I ought to find easily.
Called myself Jezebel.
I don't believe.
Before I say that the vows we made weigh like a stone in my heart.
Family is family, don't let this tear us apart.
You lie there, an innocent baby.
I feel like the thief who is raiding your home, entering and breaking and taking in every room.
I know your feelings are tender and that inside you the embers still glow.
But I'm a shadow, I'm only a bed of blackened coal.
Call myself Jezebel for wanting to leave.
I'm not saying I'm replacing love for some other word to describe the sacred tie that bound me to you.
I'm just saying we've mistaken one for thousands of words.
And for that mistake, I've caused you such pain that I damn that word.
I've no more ways to hide that I'm a desolate and empty, hollow place inside.
I'm not saying I'm replacing love for some other word to describe the sacred tie that bound me to you.
I'm not saying love's a plaything.
No, it's a powerful word, inspired by strong desire to bind myself to you.
How I wish that we never had tried to be man and his wife, to weave our lives into a blindfold over both our eyes.
The lyrics of 10000 Maniacs’ Jezebel are relatively straightforward, recounting the inner turmoil of a woman who has fallen out of love with her partner. The first verse details the lengths she has gone to in order to pretend that everything is okay, even though she has long known that the relationship is over. The line “Called myself Jezebel, I don’t believe” suggests that the singer is struggling with the guilt of wanting to leave her partner even though it goes against societal expectations that women should always be caring and supportive. The second verse is much more empathetic, as the singer laments the pain that she is causing her partner and the fact that she is “raiding” his emotional space. The final verse is an exploration of the power of love and the decision to commit to someone, regardless of societal norms.
The song's title is an allusion to the Biblical figure Jezebel, who is often seen as a symbol of promiscuity or betrayal. The singer of the song identifies with Jezebel's reputation, seeing herself as someone who has betrayed her partner by wanting to leave. However, the song also suggests that this portrayal of Jezebel is unfair, as the singer herself is not necessarily acting immorally; the line “I’m only a bed of blackened coal” suggests that she is in a state of emotional turmoil and that her desires are not necessarily bad.
Overall, Jezebel is a complex and introspective exploration of love, commitment, and societal expectations. While the singer is struggling with guilt and pain, the song makes it clear that she is not necessarily wrong to want to leave, and that the power of love can sometimes blind people to their own needs and desires.
Line by Line Meaning
To think of my task is chilling.
I am scared to consider the task before me.
To know I was carefully building the mask I was wearing for two years, swearing I'd tear it off.
I am aware that for two years, I have been creating a facade, promising myself to remove it one day.
I've sat in the dark explaining to myself that I'm straining too hard for feelings I ought to find easily.
I've contemplated in the darkness why I am struggling to attain emotions that should come easily.
Called myself Jezebel.
I've labeled myself a Jezebel.
I don't believe.
I am doubtful.
Before I say that the vows we made weigh like a stone in my heart.
Before I confess that our vows burden me heavily like a rock in my chest.
Family is family, don't let this tear us apart.
Regardless of the situation, we should not let it divide our family.
You lie there, an innocent baby.
You are lying there, an innocent child.
I feel like the thief who is raiding your home, entering and breaking and taking in every room.
I feel like a thief who is invading your home, breaking in and stealing from every room.
I know your feelings are tender and that inside you the embers still glow.
I am aware that your emotions are delicate and that inside you, there is still passion.
But I'm a shadow, I'm only a bed of blackened coal.
However, I am only a shadow, a place of darkness.
Call myself Jezebel for wanting to leave.
I label myself a Jezebel for desiring to depart.
I'm not saying I'm replacing love for some other word to describe the sacred tie that bound me to you.
I am not suggesting that I am trading love for another word to explain the bond that joined us.
I'm just saying we've mistaken one for thousands of words.
I'm merely saying that we've confused one concept for an endless amount of terminology.
And for that mistake, I've caused you such pain that I damn that word.
As a result of this error, I realize that I've caused you so much grief that I despise the word itself.
I've no more ways to hide that I'm a desolate and empty, hollow place inside.
I have exhausted my ability to conceal that I am a forlorn and vacant void within.
I'm not saying I'm replacing love for some other word to describe the sacred tie that bound me to you.
I am not asserting that I am trading love for another word to explain the sacred bond that united us.
I'm not saying love's a plaything.
I'm not implying that love is something to toy with.
No, it's a powerful word, inspired by strong desire to bind myself to you.
Rather, love is a formidable term, inspired by a strong urge to connect with you.
How I wish that we never had tried to be man and his wife, to weave our lives into a blindfold over both our eyes.
I regret that we ever attempted to become husband and wife, entangling our lives as if we were blindfolded.
Lyrics © Downtown Music Publishing
Written by: NATALIE MERCHANT
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind