Shortly before his father's death in a 1973 plane crash, Croce's family moved west to San Diego, California, where his mother, Ingrid, raised him.
At the age of four, Croce was completely blinded, as the result of a brain tumor. Between the ages of four and ten, Croce gradually regained vision in his left eye. It was during this difficult time in Croce's life that he began to play the piano. "I learned to play music by listening and playing along to the radio and to records..." Croce says, "At some point I was given the music of Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder as inspiration, which it was, and has been ever since."
Croce's first paying gig was at the age of 12, when he was paid $20 to perform at a Bat-Mitzvah party. By the age of 16, Croce was performing regularly at San Diego nightclubs, as a sideman and band leader. Croce reflects, "I was into every kind of music... you might say I was unfocused, but I consider an eclectic taste in music to be the foundation of versatility." Croce's house burned down when he was age 15.
Ron Goldstein and Peter Bauman of Private Music signed Croce to his first record deal at age 19. He recorded two CDs for Private Music: his self-titled debut, "A.J. Croce," produced by T-Bone Burnett and John Simon, and "That's Me In The Bar," produced by Jim Keltner, and featuring artists such as Ry Cooder, David Hidalgo, and Keltner himself.
Croce's third release, "Fit To Serve," was recorded in Memphis, and produced by Jim Gaines, who had previously produced Van Morrison, Santana, and The Steve Miller Band. Croce then took a musical turn with the release of his album Transit. He explained, "I had been playing blues-based music for a long time, and I was ready to try something new." Transit was compared by critics to the work of John Lennon, Elvis Costello, Bob Dylan, and Van Morrison. Glen Starkey of New Times labeled Croce "a song crafter of the first order."
A fifth CD, titled "Adrian James Croce" was released in the summer of 2004, and a sixth CD, Cantos, in 2006.
Croce has performed as an opening act for artists such as Carlos Santana, Rod Stewart, Aretha Franklin, Willie Nelson, Lyle Lovett, James Brown, Ben Harper, Dave Matthews, Earth, Wind and Fire and Ray Charles. He has also performed on such national venues as The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, The Late Show with David Letterman, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, The Today Show, Good Morning America, and Austin City Limits.
When I'm Gone
A.J. Croce Lyrics
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Written by A.J. Croce
© 2006 Croce Publishung (ASCAP)
It's peculiar she wants me by her side
I'm like her cyanide she only really wants me when I'm gone
When I'm near her she cuts me like a knife
I wish for ten to life because she only wants me when I'm gone
When I'm gone
She don't need somebody else
When I'm gone
She can't take being by herself
Complicated I'm just her ball and chain
It's almost inhumane she only wants me when I'm gone
She's a riddle that I can't figure out
At least there is no doubt she only really wants when I'm gone
Bridge
It's a little bit confusing a little bit amusing
But I just can't walk out that door
I forget what life was like before
A.J. Croce's song "When I'm Gone" tells the story of a complicated and perhaps toxic relationship. The singer describes how his partner only seems to want him when he's not around, cutting him deeply when he's near but pulling him back in when he's gone. Despite realizing the problematic nature of their dynamic, the singer feels trapped and unable to leave, describing himself as a kind of ball and chain for his partner. He admits that their relationship is confusing and sometimes amusing, but ultimately can't imagine what life would be like without her.
The lyrics of "When I'm Gone" express a theme common to many love songs - the push and pull of a complex relationship. However, Croce's portrayal is refreshingly nuanced, acknowledging the potential for harm and dysfunction even as he describes the almost magnetic attraction he feels for his partner. The repeated lines of the chorus emphasize the singer's feelings of indispensability to his partner, even as he recognizes the unhealthy aspects of their connection.
Overall, "When I'm Gone" is a poignant and honest exploration of the pleasures and pains of love. Croce's lyrics and melody combine to create a compelling narrative that speaks to anyone who has ever found themselves caught in the tangled web of a complicated relationship.
Line by Line Meaning
It's peculiar she wants me by her side
She wants me by her side, but it's peculiar because she only seems to want me around when I'm not there.
I'm like her cyanide she only really wants me when I'm gone
Being around me is like poison to her, so she only wants me when I'm gone.
When I'm near her she cuts me like a knife
Being around her hurts me deeply and makes me feel like I've been cut by a knife.
I wish for ten to life because she only wants me when I'm gone
The pain of being with her is so great that I wish for a prison sentence, but she only seems to want me around when I'm not there.
When I'm gone
She don't need somebody else
When I'm not there, she doesn't need anyone else to fill my place.
When I'm gone
She can't take being by herself
When I'm not there, she can't handle being alone and needs me to come back.
Complicated I'm just her ball and chain
Our relationship is very complicated, and I feel like I'm more of a burden to her than anything else.
It's almost inhumane she only wants me when I'm gone
Her behavior is almost cruel because she only seems to want me around when I'm not there.
She's a riddle that I can't figure out
I can't understand her or her behavior towards me.
At least there is no doubt she only really wants when I'm gone
There's no doubt that she really only wants me around when I'm not there.
It's a little bit confusing a little bit amusing
Our relationship is a little bit confusing and a little bit amusing at the same time.
But I just can't walk out that door
Despite the complications, I can't bring myself to leave her.
I forget what life was like before
I can't remember what my life was like before I met her.
Contributed by Aria M. Suggest a correction in the comments below.