AFI has released eleven studio albums, ten EPs, one live album and one DVD. The band first reached substantial commercial success with their fifth album, The Art of Drowning (2000), which peaked at number 174 on the Billboard 200. They then broke into the mainstream with their sixth, Sing the Sorrow (2003), which peaked at number five on the Billboard 200 and remained on the chart for 51 weeks. The album was supported by popular singles "Girl's Not Grey" and "Silver and Cold", both of which peaked at number seven on America's Hot Modern Rock Tracks chart in 2003. "The Leaving Song Pt. II" was also released as a single, reaching number 16 on the chart. Sing the Sorrow was certified Platinum by the RIAA in 2006 and is AFI's best-selling release, having sold over 1.26 million copies as of September 2009.
AFI's seventh album, Decemberunderground (2006), debuted at number one on the Billboard 200 and featured the hit single "Miss Murder", which topped the Hot Modern Rock Tracks chart and reached number 24 on the Billboard Hot 100. Another single, "Love Like Winter", reached number four on the Modern Rock Tracks chart. The album was certified Platinum by the RIAA in 2013.[6] Decemberunderground was followed three years later by Crash Love (2009), and then four years later by Burials (2013); both albums were also successful, peaking at number twelve and number nine, respectively, on the Billboard 200. The band's tenth and latest album, AFI (The Blood Album), was released in 2017, and peaked at number five on the Billboard 200, making it their second-highest chart position.
...but home is nowhere
AFI Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
To understand my, my intimate is no one
When the director sold the show, who bought its last rites?
They cut the cast, the music, and the lights
This is my line, this is eternal
How did I ever end up here?
Discarnate, preternatural
Absent of grace, marked as infernal
Ungranted in dead time left me disowned
To this nature, so unnatural
I remain alone
Twenty-six years end, still speaking in these tongues
Such revelations while understood by no one
When the new actor stole the show, who questioned his grace?
Please clear this house of ill-acquired taste
This is my line, this is eternal
How did I ever end up here?
Discarnate, preternatural
My prayers to disappear
Absent of grace, marked as infernal
Ungranted in dead time left me disowned
To this nature, so unnatural
I remain alone
Give me something, give me something
Give me something, give me something
Give me something, give me something real
I lay strewn across the floor, can't solve this puzzle
Everyday another small piece can't be found
I lay strewn across the floor, pieced up in sorrow
The pieces are lost, these pieces don't fit
Pieced together incomplete and empty
This is my line, this is eternal
How did I ever end up here?
Discarnate, preternatural
My prayers to disappear
Absent of grace, marked as infernal
Ungranted in dead time left me disowned
To this nature, so unnatural
I remain alone
This is my line, this is eternal
How did I end up here?
Discarnate, preternatural
My prayers to disappear
Absent of grace, marked as infernal
Ungranted in dead time left me disowned
To this nature, so unnatural
I remain alone
We held hands on the last night of eve
Our mouths filled with dust.
We kissed in the fields
And under the trees
Screaming like dogs,
Bleeding dark leaves.
It was empty on the edge of hands
But we knew everyone floated on the bottom of the river.
So we walked to the beach
The turned road curved into the sea.
And the shattered seasons lay in the bitter smell,
Burning was on you like a disease
In our kinder of passing our stay,
Death is a blind curb.
The sky came crashing down
And the three of us committed suicide
And picked up the shatters
And the ships of stars that looked like a mountain of angels
That spoke of the hearts of the undying kids
That lulled the skies to a stop.
A few insects skittered away
That in hopes of the past time kissed you on your hand
And asked if you were coming to the ball
But you made me realize
That my ticket wasn't good enough for you.
You said the cinders are falling like snow.
Serious poetry and spirit
And we sang with unrivaled beauty.
Bitter elegy of sentry and eloquence of blue and gray.
Strange you ran down desperate streets.
We carved our names on the city.
The sun has stagnated somewhere beyond the moon,
Darkness and angsty kept close in mind.
Still we lay on the hills east
And drifted slowly outward
And somewhere in the wilderness lay our salvation.
The statue, you figured, was domestic.
I cannot leave here, I cannot stay.
Forever haunted, more than afraid.
Asphyxiate on words I would say.
I'm drawn to a blackened sky turned blue.
There on a flower
No, not this time.
There'll be no angels gracing the lines.
Just these dark words I find.
I'd show a smile,
But I'm too weak.
I'd share with you,
Could I only speak,
Just how much this hurts me.
I cannot stay here, I cannot leave.
Just like all I've loved,
I'm make believe.
Imagine hard, I disappear seen.
No one to love here but me.
There on a flower
No, not this time.
There'll be no angels gracing the lines.
Just these dark words I find.
I'd show a smile,
But I'm too weak.
I'd share with you,
Could I only speak,
Just how much this hurts me.
I'd tell you how it haunts me.
I'd tell you how it haunts me.
I'd tell you how it haunts me.
You won't get it off me.
There on a flower
No, not this time.
There'll be no angels gracing the line.
Just these dark words I find.
I'd show a smile,
But I'm too weak.
I'd share with you,
Could I only speak,
Just how much this hurts me.
Just how much this hurts me.
Just how much you…
The lyrics to AFI's "...but home is nowhere" are complex and emotional, evoking themes of isolation, lack of belonging, and a yearning for something real. The singer seems to be struggling with the idea that they cannot find a true home or a sense of contentment anywhere they go, and even the people they have known or loved cannot offer them relief from their pain.
The song begins with a reflection on the singer's own life and how they feel abandoned by others who once supported them. They feel like they are speaking in tongues, unable to connect with anyone around them, and question how they ended up in this lonely place. The lyrics also address the idea of grace and infernal markings, suggesting that the singer feels like they are cursed or somehow marked as unworthy of love or belonging.
As the song progresses, the imagery becomes more disjointed and surreal, with references to shattered seasons, mountains of angels, and a blackened sky turned blue. The tone of the song becomes more desperate and hopeless, with the singer unable to leave or stay and haunted by their own thoughts.
Ultimately, the lyrics suggest a sense of resignation to the singer's fate. They are alone and hurting, unable to find the solace they desperately crave. The repeated phrase "there on a flower" becomes a motif throughout the song, representing a fleeting moment of beauty that cannot be sustained.
Line by Line Meaning
Twenty-six years and seems like I've just begun
Despite my age, I still feel like I am just starting to figure things out
To understand my, my intimate is no one
I don't really know myself and have no close relationships with anyone
When the director sold the show, who bought its last rites?
When things fall apart, who takes responsibility for the end result?
They cut the cast, the music, and the lights
They took away everything that made the show special
This is my line, this is eternal
I will always feel this way, it's an eternal part of me
How did I ever end up here?
I am questioning how I got to this point in my life
Discarnate, preternatural
Feeling lost and disconnected from the world around me
My prayers to disappear
I wish I could just disappear and escape my problems
Absent of grace, marked as infernal
I feel like I am unworthy of grace and am marked with negative energy
Ungranted in dead time left me disowned
Feeling abandoned and alone during times of darkness
To this nature, so unnatural
The circumstances of my life feel unnatural and wrong
I remain alone
Despite my desire for connection, I am still alone
Twenty-six years end, still speaking in these tongues
Despite the passing of time, I still struggle to communicate my feelings
Such revelations while understood by no one
I have profound insights, but no one else seems to understand them
When the new actor stole the show, who questioned his grace?
When someone new comes into power, no one questions their authority
Please clear this house of ill-acquired taste
Please get rid of all the bad things that have accumulated in my life
Give me something, give me something real
I want something genuine and authentic in my life
I lay strewn across the floor, can't solve this puzzle
I am lost and unable to figure out how to fix my problems
Everyday another small piece can't be found
Every day I feel like I am losing a small piece of myself
I lay strewn across the floor, pieced up in sorrow
I am broken and full of sadness
The pieces are lost, these pieces don't fit
Nothing seems to fit together and I can't find the missing pieces
Pieced together incomplete and empty
Despite my attempts to fix myself, I am still incomplete and unhappy
We held hands on the last night of eve
We were together on the last night before things changed
Our mouths filled with dust.
We were silenced and unable to speak
We kissed in the fields
We shared an intimate moment in nature
And under the trees
We found shelter and comfort in the natural world
Screaming like dogs,
We were raw and emotional, expressing ourselves like animals
Bleeding dark leaves.
We were hurting and shedding parts of ourselves like a tree losing its leaves
It was empty on the edge of hands
Things felt hollow and insincere
But we knew everyone floated on the bottom of the river.
We understood that everyone has their struggles, even if they're hidden from view
So we walked to the beach
We sought out a place of peace and calm
The turned road curved into the sea.
The path we were on led us to the unknown depths of the ocean
And the shattered seasons lay in the bitter smell,
We were surrounded by the remnants of past times and experiences
Burning was on you like a disease
You were consumed by something that was eating you alive
In our kinder of passing our stay,
As we continued on our journey and spent time together
Death is a blind curb.
Death can come unexpectedly and without warning
The sky came crashing down
Everything was falling apart and felt unstable
And the three of us committed suicide
We were willing to let go of everything and start over
And picked up the shatters
We tried to piece together what remained of our lives
And the ships of stars that looked like a mountain of angels
We were in awe of the beauty and wonder of the world
That spoke of the hearts of the undying kids
We saw hope and resilience in the younger generation
That lulled the skies to a stop.
The beauty of the world was so overwhelming that it calmed everything else down
A few insects skittered away
We saw small signs of life and activity despite our struggles
That in hopes of the past time kissed you on your hand
We were reminded of happier times, even if they couldn't be fully recaptured
And asked if you were coming to the ball
We were invited to a celebration, but we didn't feel like we belonged
But you made me realize
You helped me come to a realization
That my ticket wasn't good enough for you.
I wasn't the right fit for you, no matter how hard I tried
You said the cinders are falling like snow.
You pointed out the negative aspects of the world around us
Serious poetry and spirit
We were connected to something deeper than ourselves
And we sang with unrivaled beauty.
We expressed our emotions through beautiful music
Bitter elegy of sentry and eloquence of blue and gray.
Our emotions were a complex mix of bitterness, sadness, and beauty
Strange you ran down desperate streets.
You were willing to do anything to escape your pain
We carved our names on the city.
We left our mark on the world, even if it was just temporary
The sun has stagnated somewhere beyond the moon,
Time seems to have stopped or slowed down
Darkness and angsty kept close in mind.
We were surrounded by negative thoughts and feelings
Still we lay on the hills east
We found a moment of peace and contemplation
And drifted slowly outward
We felt ourselves drift away from the rest of the world
And somewhere in the wilderness lay our salvation.
We believed that we could find hope and healing if we just kept looking
The statue, you figured, was domestic.
You found comfort in something familiar and safe
I cannot leave here, I cannot stay.
I feel trapped and unable to move forward or stay in one place
Forever haunted, more than afraid.
I am tormented by my past and my fears
Asphyxiate on words I would say.
I feel stuck and unable to express myself fully
I'm drawn to a blackened sky turned blue.
I am drawn to beauty and light, even in dark times
There on a flower
On a small, delicate thing
No, not this time.
Things won't work out this time
There'll be no angels gracing the lines.
There won't be any magical solutions or divine interventions
Just these dark words I find.
All I have are these negative thoughts and expressions
I'd show a smile,
I would pretend to be happy
But I'm too weak.
But I don't have the strength to fake it anymore
I'd share with you,
I wish I could open up to you
Could I only speak,
If only I could find the words
Just how much this hurts me.
How much pain and sadness I am carrying
Just like all I've loved,
I have lost everyone I cared for
I'm make believe.
I am living in a world of my own creation
Imagine hard, I disappear seen.
If I try hard enough, I can almost disappear into the background
No one to love here but me.
I am the only one left to love and care for myself
I'd tell you how it haunts me.
I wish I could express how much my pain is weighing me down
You won't get it off me.
You can't take away my pain for me
There'll be no angels gracing the line.
There's no one coming to save me
Just how much you...
How much you affect me and my thoughts
Lyrics © Wixen Music Publishing
Written by: ADAM A CARSON, DAVID PADEN MARCHAND, HUNTER LAWRENCE BURGAN, JADE ERROL PUGET
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind