Chocolate
Amy Kuney Lyrics

In the morning
Starting the day with kisses and goodbyes, knowing that chocolate is waiting at home.

Goodbye kisses
A sweet parting gesture before each person leaves for their respective workday.

And all the misters
All the married men.

Kiss the misses
The wives they're leaving behind, who will spend their day with chocolate instead.

Before leaving
Heading off to work with the promise of chocolate waiting upon returning home.

For the office
Spending a day at work, where they won't have chocolate but will have the promise of it at home.

But we're not grieving
Not upset about the separation, because chocolate awaits at home.

We've got chocolate
The comfort and joy that comes with having chocolate at home.

And I'd choose it over you
Preferring the comfort of chocolate to the emotional investment of a relationship.

Any day...
Consistently and reliably choosing chocolate over a relationship.

I say Diamonds
Desiring material goods, like diamonds.

You can't afford 'em
Being unable to attain the desired material goods.

So I say mansions
Desiring bigger and better things.

You say mortgage
Recognizing the responsibilities that come with such a desire.

We start to argue
Disagreeing over what is desired versus what is reasonable.

I say "You win"
Giving up the argument because it's not worth it.

You have your victory
The other person gets their way, even if it's not what's wanted.

I have my chocolate
The comfort of knowing that chocolate is waiting at home, regardless of the outcome of the argument.

And I'd choose it over you
Preferring the comfort of chocolate to fighting and argument in a relationship.

Any day...
Consistently and reliably choosing chocolate over fighting and disagreement.

I'm leaving traces
Being careless with the evidence of chocolate consumption.

Dirty Spoons
Leaving behind unwashed utensils, indicating that chocolate was consumed without regard for cleanliness or secrecy.

I'm getting careless
Being less concerned about hiding the chocolate consumption, indicating a lack of concern for what the partner may think.

And pretty soon
Indicating an awareness that the partner may catch on soon enough.

You're gonna catch me in the act
Knowing that the partner will eventually see the evidence first-hand.

And we'll try couples therapy
Attempting to correct the problem with professional help.

I know that won't help
Already understanding that therapy will likely not work for this issue.

Cuz if she's a woman
Expecting that the therapist will be female.

She'll agree with me
Believing that the therapist will empathize with the chocolate preferences over the relationship issues.

It's been a hard day
Acknowledging that things have been difficult throughout the day.

At the office
Referring to the challenges and stresses faced at work throughout the day.

So I'll surprise you
Trying to bring joy and excitement to the relationship regardless of the issues around chocolate consumption.

In my lace pajamas
Presenting oneself in a desirable and intimate way.

But before things
Just before jumping into bed.

Get hot and heavy
Before beginning physical intimacy.

I hear you snoring
Realizing that the partner has already fallen asleep.

You're fast asleep
The physical and emotional connection have not been achieved.

So in the darkness
After realizing the partner is asleep and intimacy is not going to happen.

I sneak to the kitchen
Heading to the secret stash of chocolate to soothe the disappointment and sadness.

Where my chocolate
The coveted stash of chocolate.

Has been hiding
Keeping the chocolate from discovery by the partner.

And I'd choose it over you
Preferring the comfort of chocolate to physical intimacy.

Any day....
Consistently and reliably choosing chocolate over physical intimacy.