Android Lust is a pseudonym of Shikhee D’iordna (aka Shikhee), which begun … Read Full Bio ↴Android Lust is a pseudonym of Shikhee D’iordna (aka Shikhee), which begun in 1995 and débuted with "Resolution" (Tinman, 1997).

Struggle is a natural part of the creative process for many artists. For Shikhee, the one-woman army behind industrial act Android Lust, struggle became downright essential to the production of the fourth Android Lust album, The Human Animal. Not by choice, of course: Nearly a decade after debuting as the first one-woman industrial act, the Bangladeshi-born New Yorker found herself burnt out from balancing a music career with what some might call “real life.”

The process of making 2006’s Devour, Rise and Take Flight ws “a very trying period,” says Shikhee. “I was coming home from my job around 9 or 10, and then mixing till 2 or 3, only to get back up and get to work at 9 again. I was barely sleeping and losing weight.” Problems with her record label compounded her frustration; the heavy touring season that followed, prolonged it.

When the album cycle finally wrapped, Shikhee returned home to face some familiar fears. “It’s always a bit scary. I start to doubt myself, reacquaint myself with my studio . . . and wonder if I can still do it,” she says. “It took until late 2007 to get back to writing.”

The Human Animal is undeniable proof that she can, indeed, still “do it.” After two albums on preeminent electronic-music label Projekt Records, Shikhee released Animal in August 2010 on her own Synthellec Music. In production for more than two years, this is the work of an artist reinvigorated by the creative process, adding a new set of colors to her signature sonic palette. “It just happened one day after we came back from our tour,” Shikhee recalls. “Songs just started flooding.”

The flood was triggered in part by Shikhee’s decision to work with her live band in the studio for the first time. “In the past I played all the guitars and some bass [in addition to electronic instruments], but now I had access to these really talented musicians and I wanted to bring that touch in the studio. So I wrote parts for them, parts that were beyond my playing ability.”

The mix of live instruments and processed sounds isn’t new for an Android Lust recording—2003’s breakthrough The Dividing featured live drums, string and wind instrument—but never have those sounds figured so prominently as they do on The Human Animal. The slippery undertones of “A New Heaven” are revealed to be an upright bass; pockets of classical guitar propel “Into the Sun”; the overdriven guitars on “Saint Over” surge forth with the spark of vintage Nine Inch Nails. It’s the most organic-sounding Android Lust record while losing none of the unrelenting sonic edge of prior releases.

It’s not just the live instrumentation that brings the album uncharacteristic warmth. Shikhee took to the streets of New York City with a portable recorder, collecting noises that would be used to form rhythms and ambiance throughout the record. The sounds of a screeching subway, a crowded restaurant, geese, pigeons, and a Barnes & Noble escalator all found their way into the mix.

And Shikhee has never sounded better, her whisper-to-a-scream vocals on a par with Polly Jean Harvey (“It’s On You”) and Ruby’s Leslie Rankine (“God in the Hole”).

For an artist whose overarching aesthetic has sought to blur the line between human and machine, Shikhee here sets her sights on the battle between the physical and the spiritual. Much of The Human Animal is about tapping into the deeper well of universal energy within to find true meaning, freeing oneself (the human) from the imprisonment of ego (the animal). “A New Heaven” sums up the central query: “Are we the ones we are seeking under this sun?”

But despite the sometimes reflective tone this is not music for meditation. The Human Animal’s 10 songs, plus a Jerome Dillon remix of “God in the Hole” to close the disc, pulse and pound, posing both an invitation and a challenge to the listener. Welcome to the age of enlightenment for Android Lust.

- by John Brodeur

Cherished Agony
Android Lust Lyrics

Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴

Cherished agony
Have you not swallowed the last drops of pride
That have dripped on your tongue
Have you not inhaled the stench
That rises as you walk
In your sweet dreams
This childlike monster caresses your back
You hear the peals of laughter

Do you feel you are submerged in acid bath

Cherished agony
Have you now descended
To the bowels of your fear
Sensing it's the end
You've surrendered to the whims of this monster
Your will has shattered
Betrayed by innocence

You remember each act of rejection
As you reach for a stint of affection
Does it matter how you suffer

Your will has shattered
Crushed by innocence

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of Android Lust's "Cherished Agony" depict the inner turmoil and pain felt by someone who has been victimized, possibly by abuse or trauma. The opening lines reference the swallowing of pride, indicating that the individual has been forced to endure something that goes against their self-respect and dignity. The stench that rises as they walk could represent the shame that they are carrying with them, or the lingering effects of the trauma they have experienced.

The song then moves into a dream-like state, with the mention of a childlike monster caressing their back and the sound of peals of laughter. This could potentially represent the way in which the individual's trauma has infiltrated and affected their subconscious, or the idea that they are unable to escape the memories that haunt them, even in their sleep. The chorus repeats the phrase "cherished agony," suggesting that the individual may have come to accept and even internalize their suffering, potentially identifying with it in some way.

The second verse describes a descent into fear and surrender to the monster, indicating that the individual has reached a point of hopelessness and defeat. The mention of innocence being betrayed could suggest that the person was victimized at a young age, or that they were powerless to prevent the abuse or trauma they experienced. The final lines of the song express the futility of their suffering, with the realization that their will has been shattered and they are unable to escape the pain, no matter how much they may try to reach out for comfort or affection.

Line by Line Meaning

Cherished agony
The pain has become so familiar that it feels like it's a part of you that you cannot bear to let go.

Have you not swallowed the last drops of pride
Have you not let go of the last remnants of your esteem and self-respect.

That have dripped on your tongue
That were so much a part of you that they felt like they were literally in your mouth.

Have you not inhaled the stench
Have you not been completely consumed by the toxicity of your situation.

That rises as you walk
That surrounds you like a cloud, always with you wherever you go.

In your sweet dreams
Even in your dreams, this pain and suffering persist, taunting you with no escape.

This childlike monster caresses your back
The source of your pain is innocent-looking and childlike, but it still causes you deep harm and hurt.

You hear the peals of laughter
Even as your pain is so real and present, you can hear the mocking laughter of those who are causing it.

Do you feel you are submerged in acid bath
The pain is so intense that it feels like you are sinking into an acidic bath, slowly being burned away.

Have you now descended
You have now sunk to the lowest depths of your despair and pain.

To the bowels of your fear
You are now fully consumed by your fear, unable to see anything but pain and suffering around you.

Sensing it's the end
You know deep down that this cannot go on forever, that there must be some kind of resolution soon, however painful it may be.

You've surrendered to the whims of this monster
You are now fully at the mercy of the thing that is causing you pain and suffering, unable to fight back or seek escape.

Your will has shattered
You have lost all your hope and belief in yourself, feeling powerless to change your situation or overcome your pain.

Betrayed by innocence
The situation that caused your pain and suffering was innocent and blameless, which only makes it that much harder to bear.

You remember each act of rejection
You cannot forget the pain of each time you were rejected or hurt, carrying the weight of them all with you always.

As you reach for a stint of affection
As you seek out any kind of love or validation, even if it is only temporary or fleeting, to help relieve the pain.

Does it matter how you suffer
You have become so accustomed to suffering that the specific ways that it hurts you no longer matter, it is all the same endless cycle of heartache and pain.

Your will has shattered
You have lost all your hope and belief in yourself, feeling powerless to change your situation or overcome your pain.

Crushed by innocence
You have been brought to your knees by the innocuous source of your pain, unable to understand how something so small could cause so much hurt.

Contributed by Joseph D. Suggest a correction in the comments below.

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