Christmas
Ann-Margaret / Oliver Reed / Alison Dowling Lyrics


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Christmas is the season
That all of us wait for
But this year is a little different
Christmas feels like a chore
I don’t know what you’ve been thinkin’
But I think we all agree
We might be excited for Santa to come
But I’m feelin’ trapped emotionally
I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I wanna kill myself, this Christmas Eve
I’ve been wanting to do it, it’ll set me free
Looks like I found the perfect opportunity
I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I wanna kill myself this Christmas Eve
I wrote one thing on my wishlist
I pleaded for some snow
I checked the forecast, it’s only rain
So I guess that’s my cue to go
I have always wondered just
how would I do the deed…
What’s the quickest way without any pain
Could I overdose on weed?
I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I wanna kill myself, this Christmas Eve
I wanna slit my throat, or get eaten by a goat
Or tie myself up and drown slowly in a boat
I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I wanna kill myself this Christmas Eve
I went homeless in the Fall
Since last Spring I haven’t worked out at all
I got an early period in the Summer
I lost a bunch’o friends - this Winter’s a bummer…
But don’t forget!
I’m gonna kill myself (Kill myself)
I’m gonna kill myself (Kill myself)
I I’m gonna kill myself (Kill myself)
I’m gonna kill myself, this Christmas Eve
I’m asking for a shot gun, whatever get’s the job done
The best gift of all is my blood on the wall (Fun!)
I’m gonna kill myself (Kill myself)
I’m gonna put my body underneath that tree
I’m gonna kill myself (Kill myself)
I’m gonna kill myself (Kill myself)
I’m gonna kill myself (Kill myself)
I’m gonna kill myself, this Christmas Eve
Instead of my grandma, make it be me
I’ll jump in front of any reindeer I see
I’m gonna kill myself (Kill myself)




Cuz I wanna kill myself this Christmas Eve!
Please

Overall Meaning

It’s important to note that the lyrics of this song are very dark and touch on the topic of suicide. The song is sung from the perspective of someone who is feeling trapped emotionally, and is expressing a desire to end their life on Christmas Eve. The singer muses about ways in which they could take their own life, even going so far as to suggest slitting their throat, getting eaten by a goat, or drowning in a boat. The lyrics are intentionally provocative, and it's clear that the singer wants to make a statement about feeling emotionally overwhelmed during the holiday season.


The song highlights the pressure that people can feel during Christmas, and the weight of expectation that can come with the season. The singer feels that they should be excited about Christmas, but instead feels trapped, which leads them to contemplate suicide. The lyrics are raw and unapologetically honest, and are clearly intended to challenge the listener's perspective on the “happiest time of the year”.


Line by Line Meaning

Christmas is the season
The time of year we all look forward to


That all of us wait for
The one we eagerly anticipate


But this year is a little different
However, things feel atypical this year


Christmas feels like a chore
It's starting to feel like an obligation


I don't know what you've been thinkin
I'm not sure what others are thinking


But I think we all agree
But we probably all feel the same


We might be excited for Santa to come
Sure, we're looking forward to Santa's arrival


But I'm feeling trapped emotionally
But deep down, I feel trapped and unhappy


I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I feel like ending it all


I wrote one thing on my wishlist
On my Christmas list, there was one thing I wanted


I pleaded for some snow
All I wanted was a white Christmas


I checked the forecast, it's only rain
But the forecast predicts rain instead


So I guess that's my cue to go
This must be a sign to leave this life behind


I have always wondered just how would I do the deed
I've always been curious about how to do it


What's the quickest way without any pain
What's the fastest way with minimal suffering?


Could I overdose on weed?
Will overdosing on marijuana work?


I wanna kill myself, this Christmas Eve
I've decided to end it all on Christmas Eve


I wanna slit my throat, or get eaten by a goat
I don't care how I go, I just want to die


Or tie myself up and drown slowly in a boat
Even if it's a long, painful death, I'm okay with it


I went homeless in the Fall
I've been homeless since autumn


Since last Spring I haven't worked out at all
I stopped exercising since last spring


I got an early period in the Summer
I had a medical issue that caused me to have an early period this summer


I lost a bunch'o friends - this Winter's a bummer...
I've been feeling down lately because I lost some friends this winter


But don't forget!
But wait, there's more!


I'm gonna kill myself, this Christmas Eve
Despite everything, I will still end my life on Christmas Eve


I'm asking for a shot gun, whatever get's the job done
I'm determined to get my hands on a shotgun, or anything that will do the job


The best gift of all is my blood on the wall (Fun!)
I find joy in the thought of my own blood on the wall as a gift to myself


Cuz I wanna kill myself this Christmas Eve!
All I want for Christmas is to end my life, for good


I'm gonna put my body underneath that tree
I've already planned where I want my body to be found - under the Christmas tree


Cuz I wanna kill myself (Kill myself)
I can't emphasize enough how much I want to die




Lyrics © DistroKid
Written by: Claire Corlett

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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