The music of Anna Ash is like hanging out in a dark dive bar that only serves cotton candy. There is something haunting and angelic about her voice, but something heartbreaking and dark about her songs. She drinks whiskey on stage and belts old fashioned soul sounding tunes about babes and bicycle crashes. She's not old-timey, but she's nowhere near pop. Her voice will remind you of something your grandma once played, but a little more crass, and a little less careful.
Apologies
Anna Ash Lyrics
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And just forgiving myself
I'm getting better at calling your bullshit
Within a reasonable doubt
I'm always making these jokes about manners
And how lost everyone out here seems to be
But honestly I'm the type of woman who profusely apologies when I shouldn't be
I really try not to think about the years
I really try to think it was all very meaningful
And it was just building up to be this really great moment
Because there's so many ways to live and there's so many reasons to cry
And with just a little bit of a privilege
You can start believing your own lies
I used to be fine being the only woman in the room
But then man
All that noise just starts to get to you
I keep dreaming that someone's truly trying to kill me
And I wake up breathless and terrified to move
Just another reason why we keep our loved ones by our side
'Cause there's no getting out there's only getting through it
I'm getting better at walking away
And closing the door loudly behind me
'Cause there's no trophy at the end
Of the day for being easy going and charming
In Anna Ash's song Apologies, she reflects on her personal growth and development as she navigates her relationships and interactions with others. She starts the song by expressing that she is improving at not constantly apologizing for everything and learning to forgive herself. She continues by calling out others for their "bullshit" and being more assertive about her boundaries. However, despite all these improvements, she acknowledges that she still has moments of weakness where she apologizes for things she shouldn't. She then reflects on the years she's wasted on people and trying to find meaning in those experiences, ultimately realizing that life has many different paths and reasons for tears. She discusses the privilege of being able to believe your own lies and the impact of being the only woman in the room. She ends the song by saying that she's also learning to walk away from situations that aren't serving her and realizing that being easy going and charming doesn't necessarily lead to a trophy at the end of the day.
The lyrics show a lot of vulnerability and self-reflection as Anna Ash tackles difficult themes of self-forgiveness and learning when to stand up for yourself. She portrays a sense of growth and maturity throughout the song, but also acknowledges that there's still more work to be done. The song encourages listeners to reflect on their own relationships and interactions with others and to not be afraid to set boundaries and prioritize their own wellbeing.
Line by Line Meaning
I'm getting better at not saying sorry
I'm learning not to apologize unnecessarily.
And just forgiving myself
I'm practicing self-forgiveness.
I'm getting better at calling your bullshit
I'm improving at recognizing and confronting dishonesty.
Within a reasonable doubt
But only if I have enough evidence to support my claim.
I'm always making these jokes about manners
I often joke about people's poor conduct and behavior.
And how lost everyone out here seems to be
And how clueless most people appear to be about basic etiquette and courtesy.
But honestly I'm the type of woman who profusely apologies when I shouldn't be
But I'm actually the kind of person who apologizes excessively even when it's not necessary.
I really try not to think about the years
I do my best not to dwell on the past.
And all the people and the time I wasted on them
And the time and energy I spent on people who didn't deserve it.
I really try to think it was all very meaningful
Instead, I try to see the value in those experiences and learn from them.
And it was just building up to be this really great moment
And that all those experiences were leading up to something positive.
Because there's so many ways to live and there's so many reasons to cry
Because life can be experienced and interpreted in countless ways, and there's no shortage of reasons to feel sad.
And with just a little bit of privilege
And when you have some degree of advantage, privilege, or power.
You can start believing your own lies
It's easy to deceive yourself or others when you have privilege and start believing your own falsehoods.
I used to be fine being the only woman in the room
I used to be comfortable and confident being the only woman in a male-dominated space.
But then man
But eventually, it got tiring and frustrating.
All that noise just starts to get to you
All the sexist remarks, objectification, and disrespect towards women starts to affect you negatively.
I keep dreaming that someone's truly trying to kill me
I have recurring and intense nightmares about someone intending to harm me.
And I wake up breathless and terrified to move
And I often wake up gasping for air, feeling scared, and unable to move.
Just another reason why we keep our loved ones by our side
It's another reason why we cherish and protect our close friends and family.
'Cause there's no getting out there's only getting through it
Because when you face difficult or traumatic situations, the only way is to endure and cope with them.
I'm getting better at walking away
I'm learning to detach myself from toxic and negative situations.
And closing the door loudly behind me
And making a firm statement by leaving and showing that I won't tolerate mistreatment.
'Cause there's no trophy at the end
Because there's no reward or recognition for enduring mistreatment or staying in bad situations.
Of the day for being easy going and charming
Being agreeable and charming won't get you far or protect you from harm in the long run.
Writer(s): Anna Ash
Contributed by Lucy S. Suggest a correction in the comments below.