Brianstorm
Arctic Monkeys Lyrics

Brian
Referring to someone named Brian, who is the subject of the song.

Top marks for not trying
A sarcastic compliment to Brian for his seemingly effortless and nonchalant attitude.

So kind of you to bless us
A jab at Brian's egotistical personality, implying that he thinks highly of himself and others are lucky to be in his presence.

With your effortlessness
Continuing the sarcastic tone, commenting on how Brian seems to effortlessly accomplish things that others find difficult.

We're grateful and so strangely comforted
Further ridiculing Brian's overinflated sense of self-importance and how it affects others in his presence.

And I wonder
Transition to the next verse, where the singer poses a rhetorical question about Brian's motivations.

Are you putting us under
The singer suspects that Brian is manipulating those around him for his own gain or entertainment.

'Cause we can't take our eyes
Brian's image and persona are so captivating that others are drawn to him and cannot look away.

Off the t-shirt and ties combination?
Brian's appearance is specifically noted as something that is alluring to others.

Well, see you later, innovator
Sarcastic farewell to Brian, using his nickname sarcastically to imply that he is not actually an innovator or original thinker.

Some want to kiss, some want to kick you
Some people are drawn to Brian romantically, while others dislike his personality and want to hurt him.

There's not a net you couldn't slip through
Brian can easily avoid any consequences or problems that come his way.

Or at least that's the impression I get
The singer is not entirely sure if Brian's smoothness is genuine or an act.

'Cause you're smooth, and you're wet
Brian is slick and charming, and the singer suspects that he uses this to manipulate others to his advantage.

And she's not aware yet
A woman (or women) has not yet realized that Brian is using his charm and charisma to manipulate her.

But she's yours
Brian has likely seduced or charmed this woman into being his romantic partner or conquest.

She'll be saying, "use me
The woman will be willing to do whatever Brian wants, including engaging in sexual activities.

Show me the jacuzzi"
Brian may use his wealth or status to impress and seduce women, such as showing off a luxurious jacuzzi.

I imagine that it's there on a plate
The singer imagines that Brian has everything handed to him on a silver platter, including women and luxuries.

Your whole rendezvous rate
Brian's success rate with women is high, possibly due to his manipulative tactics and charming personality.

Means that you'll never be frightened
Brian is confident in his ability to seduce or manipulate women, and is not afraid of rejection or judgment.

To make them wait for a while
Brian may use the tactic of making women wait or work for his attention, further increasing his allure and power over them.

I doubt it's your style
The singer is skeptical of Brian's true intentions or personality, implying that his behavior is an act or façade.

Not to get what you set
Brian always gets what he wants, using his charm and manipulation to achieve his goals.

Out to acquire, the eyes are on fire
Others are envious or obsessed with Brian's success and charisma, further increasing his power and allure.

You are the unforecasted storm
Brian is unpredictable and uncontrollable, similar to a storm that cannot be predicted or avoided.

(Brian) calm, collected and commanding
Brian appears calm and confident, despite the chaos and drama that he brings with him.

(Top marks for not trying)
Sarcastic aside to Brian, complimenting his seemingly effortless ability to manipulate others and cause drama.

You leave the other stories standing
Brian's behavior and antics are unique and stand out from others, making him more alluring and powerful.

With your renditions and jokes
Brian may use witty comments or jokes to charm and manipulate others.

Bet there's hundreds of blokes
Many others have likely been charmed and manipulated by Brian, further increasing his power and influence over others.

That have wept 'cause you've stolen their
Others may be jealous or upset that Brian has taken advantage of them, making them feel foolish or manipulated.

Thunder
Using a metaphor, Brian has taken away others' power or influence and made it his own.