Brad and Scott Allen are father and son from Livonia Michigan. They're Leis… Read Full Bio ↴Brad and Scott Allen are father and son from Livonia Michigan. They're Leisure Studios is in the Allen family basement. Over the last several years they have worked together on different projects and decided it was time to actually write and record together. The result is Arranged Marriage. Scott and his brother Ryan are members of Thunderbirds Are Now!, an acclaimed indie rock band that has released 2 albums on the French Kiss label. He has toured extensively in the states as well as Europe and Australia. He also released “Scott Allen and the Breakdance” a surprisingly mature album when he was 16 on the Suburban Sprawl label. Brad has recorded several albums for local acts including, Red Shirt Brigade, The Javelins, Tiny Steps, Thunderbirds Are Now!, The Recital, New Grenada and others. He played live for years with The Voyager Band and The AllTin Brothers. His self released EP called “Nifty at Fifty” was produced in 2005. This new projects is literally a mix of the old and new – which coincidently – meets somewhere in the middle. Their joint love of singer/song writers – both new and old – is reflected in their musical and lyrical approach to the songs. They wear their influences clearly on their sleeve and you’ll defiantly hear songs that that will remind you of other artists - and that’s cool with them. Look for more updates regarding the release of their CD.

Not A Waste Of Time
Arranged Marriage Lyrics

We have lyrics for these tracks by Arranged Marriage:

Everything Is Gonna Be Alright Leave that smile on your face And don't think about the…

The lyrics are frequently found in the comments by searching or by filtering for lyric videos

TRACKS

Genre not found

Artist not found

Album not found

Search results not found

Song not found

Comments from YouTube:

Isha

3y↑34.4K

Divorce rate in india isn't low because arranged marriages work, it's because divorce is considered a taboo in India

suprovo

@Dev vikram Singh only guys think like that. 😂

Harsha

Ok so what is the problem if it is a taboo?

Sanjay

All indians from a large family will have atleast one arrange married couple with a bad relationship.

Mahad Bahad

Tharun Sankar

@Sathvik Mulukutla and again that’s still a generalization.

442 More Replies...

Phot

3y↑2.6K

A summary of Rina's whole argument : "I have friends from America who thinks arrange marriages works and I have white validilation so I'm not wrong. Also these never happened to me so therefore it must not exist. Arrange marriages are best and always works but I am divorced from an arrange marriage. Not to mention I am extremely privilege and my source is "trust me bro"

Anju

She made it look like middle grounds america.

athenalong

TRUST ME BRO 😭😭😭

Kings and Angels

😭😭😂😂

Kavya

Best comment fr

renariA

2y↑4

@rising redstone duh? These parents think that they're doing the best for their kids, and when said kids (adults) express their discontent, they'd think that they're ungrateful. And in countries where arranged marriages are dominant, a lot of people are bound to get shamed for having a divorce. You won't get shamed for having a divorce in the US as much as you would in India, because there, it's like going 'rogue'.

I'm not trying to convince you of anything, because like I said, I simply do not care what you believe.

15 More Replies...

Alexandra Drew

3y↑1.2K

the main arguments for arranged marriage were essentially “well, my arranged marriage is/was fine” and “i can’t seem to figure out how to date on my own so i need someone to do it for me.” Idk if it’s just me but Pradhyuman’s whole rant about how online dating didn’t work for him just screamed “i favor arranged marriage because then woman are obligated to talk to me.” gross. like Aastha mentioned, most of the points they made seemed to come from a very privileged place. i’m glad that the two of them didn’t end up in miserable, or downright abusive, arranged marriages but that is not the case for many, many people.

argo

you seem to be really shallow in your thought process

C

@Utkarsh Mehta where is there an x for women?

Shaw

2y↑2

yeah super strong incel vibes from that one lol

Snow Key

2y↑1

For him, love marriage is only limited within those dating apps.

Juhi Sengu

2y↑2

@Utkarsh Mehta I’m not sure about the point you’re making. I am not against arranged marriage but I am against the lack of agency in arranged marriages - for both, men and women. I understand the dating app point to the extent that obviously, it’s about how a person looks and only then would you be texting that person. But, at the end of the day, you still have the choice to talk/not talk to the other person which can be missing in arranged marriage settings.

11 More Replies...

Sunshine 🌿

3y↑603

Aastha is honestly the only person worth listening to here, because she seems to be the only one in touch with the modern situation and current reality of the general middle/upper class people of India. The points she raised were so valid, and the concerns she pointed out were those that pretty much every single woman would have.

alex47_in_downtown

@vIPR exactly

vIPR

2y↑2

You are just anti-arrange marriage.
I think the wiser individual is between

Joe Jonathan

2y↑271

Pradhyuman is literally like "I'm to Lazy to be in a committed relationship and find a girl who will be with me so I just asked my parents to find some girl who has no choice but to be with me"

Aleena Khan

2y↑4

I feel like people think forced marriage and arranged marriage are synonymous with one another (they're not). Arranged marriage is when your family sets up meetings with other families and you can meet a possible partner; if you don't like them then you can say no. Forced marriage is what you're thinking of when you say "find some girl who has no choice but to be with me"

Devils Talk

2y↑2

See whatever pradhyuman speak I don't see any sense and valid point always changing his point. Please bro I'm not with love married or arranged married. I just want to say is that, at least see through a perspective of those middle class women whom had some limited choice or opinion toward married due to society and parent willingness.

Dondre James

2y↑10

why are you assuming there's no choice involved? Why are you calling him lazy? Texting isn't a relationship.

Maple Lu

3y↑12.6K

I think If people still want to have an arranged marriage that’s fine, not everyone wants a conventional marriage. It’s just sad when they are forced to do it and get shamed when they want a divorce

TK

Exactly! The most important thing is autonomy and CHOICE, which the privileged folks are so unaware they have. Go to any rural village and the people there do not have the same choices. Do whatever you want, you can’t force someone to get an arranged marriage because ultimately it is something that should be up to the individual, regardless of familial opinion. Also, familial support is not something that should be so sought after, it should be a given. Part of the obligations you make when you become a parent is to support your child in whatever endeavors they choose to pursue, whether that’s academically, romantically, career-wise, etc.

The Brock

2y↑1

Ikr. Every time my family (we are Indian) get invited to a wedding my mum always asks if the marriage is love or arranged and then tuts if it's love. Im hoping she gives me the freedom to do what i like but by the looks of it probably not.

Kamya Gupta

yes

smileplz

💯Nothing is black or white , what about someone who dont have any affair obviously the option will be arranged marriage,,even love marriage can fail at a point,,.The only thing is that divorce should be normalised and not seen as a stigma.

Rejuana Uddin

Forced marriage is not arranged marriage

69 More Replies...

Aditya Bhattacharyya

3y↑130

lets be real, any marriage can fail - love or arranged. so what really needs to be done is normalise divorce instead of making it a taboo, so that we can all get a 2nd chance if needed

MadWorker

@Aditya Bhattacharyya you are a b*tch
If I was in you place I would have your dismantled your dad into another dimension

Aditya Bhattacharyya

@Nandan my mom was domestically abused at home. And if she didn’t come out of that marriage and resumed her carrier we would have been in the streets now. There are many people who would just there together just because people like you will judge them. Stop judging people. It’s ok if a marriage does not work.

alex47_in_downtown

2y↑2

@swati sainiWhen people divorce they've either made a bad partner choice in the first place or they are giving up too early on their marriage...increasing no. of people are having a forever-lovey-dovey-fairytale idea of relationships nowadays which ultimately leads to resentment.

Sanj Ramesh

2y↑3

I think the most important thing is the relationship. Whether the person you love and you are willing to spend the rest of your life together.

swati saini

2y↑6

There is a long way to go for divorce to be destigmatied

Diana Potra

3y↑522

As a European, this video was fascinating to watch. I’ve never met anyone who is/was in an arranged marriage. In my country arranged marriages stopped being a thing over a century ago so it was really fascinating to see how modern people grapple with it, and how their society is affected by its continuation. Also, props to Aasta! She seems so intelligent!

alex47_in_downtown

@Tarun Kumar S. P "liberal" doesn't necessarily mean open minded...saying this as an ex-liberal myself.

alex47_in_downtown

2y↑1

Plz don't tell me arranged marriage wasn't a thing in Europe in the 1920s...I'm from Manchester & almost everyone in the 20s in the West had family involved in uniting suitors.

You're depicting the 70s

The Enlightened

2y↑1

@Diana Potra Not sure why you think it’s a horrible thing! I’ve heard people in Europe (that’s where I live) tell me horror relationship stories because of partners they found for themselves. We don’t want your judgement. Not like you have enviable lasting marital relationships anyway. A lot of people in the West can’t sustain a relationship for a decade let alone a lifetime. It does matter whether you find or your parents find a partner for you, if both of you respect each other and are willing to put in efforts, it will work!

lunar

2y↑1

@Elara EXACTLY!! internalized racism to its core

Tarun Kumar S. P

@Elara if i were not gay i would love to marry a girl of my own race but i would want her to be open minded and also live in a society of open minded people, but in india a very less percentage is open minded

20 More Replies...

Sumedha Sampath

3y↑389

The fact that Rina brought up the 1% divorce rate in the beginning shows how privilege and unaware she is? Like sis the absolute last reason it’s that low is people being happy in their marriage lmao.

Also love how the pro arranged marriage people were mainly single and divorced no shade tho ✋🏻

idhemfcn oh no

3y↑27

you're absolutely right. the pro arranged marriage guy also seemed to put himself on a high pedestal for thinking that the girl/woman is obligated to talk to him. that's quite unfair and i would walk out immediately had i been put in such a situation. it's sad that india still have such views on marriage and women do not always get a say in such matters. the misogyny is clear as day with it

elva136

3y↑203

15:01 "why are you narrowing down your relationship to your parents?" Suvir didnt talk much. But he just hit the nail with whatever he said. Absolutely 1000% correct.

DSA

2y↑1

its hard for some people so let it be, and its okay to be like that.

Mia

Agreed

chun nu

2y↑3

EXACTLY. RESPECT.

not on fire

3y↑11.6K

As an Indian I would just like to point out that even though arranged marriages in India have a very low divorce rate it's not necessarily a good thing. Domestic abuse in India is horrifyingly high and as divorce is still stigmatized a LOT in Indian society many find it hard to leave. Domestic abuse is still normalised by many people so many victims think they're obliged to tolerate some of it. Also a lot of women might be financially completely dependent on their husbands so it makes leaving a marriage very hard. Lower divorce rates =/= happy marriages

Rupam Tiwari

@Yashvi Parikh is marriage some bussiness ????!!??

Rupam Tiwari

@Yashvi Parikh is marriage some bussiness ????!!??

Rupam Tiwari

@Yashvi Parikh lol the current amber and Jhonny dep case is revealing the love marriage consent part 🤔😂

Rupam Tiwari

2y↑1

@X O arranger marriage did not mean a forced marriage ,even my mother time when she arranged marriage my nana and Nani had taken their consent if he likes or not so don't generalise

Rupam Tiwari

@Anushka Mishra mere village ek ne karne ki koshish ki thi domestic violence uske baad poore gaon ke logo ne uski itani kutai ki uske baad aaj tak wo uchi awaaj me bhi bolne se darta hai as far as my experience arrange marriage has been successful

161 More Replies...

elva136

3y↑276

11:50 THANK YOU FOR CALLING OUT THEIR PRIVILEGE. This girl is on fire. Wish I could learn to talk like that. I had be less apologetic about my behavior with a lot of self entitled pricks every day.

Ritu Talathi

2y↑71

There should have been LGBTQAI+ representation. There would have been very different perspective. For example 13:00 For this question I would have said no, parental support is not important to me because my family and India as a whole is very homophobic. It is a privilege to have parental support not a necessity.

chun nu

2y↑1

Agreed!

Yahudi

India is less homophobic than your western slavemasters. Homophobia here is passive a.k.a. fear of unknown while in west they actively abuse lgbt

Slavic Aussie

2y↑1

Come on bruh, you know the Indians aren't afraid of the gays. It's the other way around.

Amazing Grace

3y↑285

Yes Aastha girl! The youngest yet the one that makes more sense.

Someone should do a reality check to that Rina New Yorker and that other younger guy.

Le Provokateur

3y↑6

I mean since the year 2000, the elders are not source of respect a d wisdoms lmao, they are complete jokes, proper boomers and Karen’s and we shouldn’t continue in their era, the youth is wisdom and progress

God

3y↑8

Age does not equal wisdom a lot of the time

Saswati Das

3y↑136

Advantage of arrange marriage:- If it fails you can blame your parents.
Advantage of love marriage:-If it fails parents can blame you .
But how far we can go to blame each other, instead of taking responsibilities ?

Anonymous Anonymous

2y↑6

Valid point

Maria Josh

2y↑5

very true!

H e l l o hi

3y↑6.6K

The very sentence "I would get a divorce if I'm unhappy in my marriage" would be a luxury to a lot of people in this country.

alex47_in_downtown

2y↑1

Being "unhappy" is a very fragile reason to divorce though...life isn't a lovey- dovey fairytale all the damn time.

AC

happiness comes and go

Yakk Kimitsu

Women ' rights are often not respected there.

Kamya Gupta

❤️

Monica VanDeventer

2y↑3

So basically, it’s ALL about them, and what the other person CAN offer them, which is extremely, and beyond selfish. Everyone becomes unhappy in a marriage at some point, so if you’re going to divorce, and remarry every time you hit a low point, then you’ll just be an adulterer—nothing less, nothing more. This is why society is falling apart, everyone is selfish by nature.

27 More Replies...

P

3y↑146

When someone gives me the argument that arranges marriage had a low divorce rate well yeah because you did not enter the marriage with your full choice then how the hell can you get out by your free will

The Stranger

Yep, as if that’s somehow proof that arranged marriage is better? If anything it shows there is little free will and lots of pressure to conform to social mores.

Shallow Valkyrie

3y↑7

True

Calinho

3y↑145

"You know us girls are more fascinated by the idea of the wedding rather than marriage." Says a lot..

Raihanna Jallow

2y↑103

I am a Fulani from West Africa, and I can relate a lot with the issues being discussed in here. The divorce rate in my ethnic group is extremely low too,and most marriages are arranged...But almost 90% of those marriages are miserable,and there is this fear of divorce, because for women, it will be extremely difficult for them to remarry and men that are in unhappy marriages can always cheat and if caught they either marry a second, third or fourth wife.
But I am very happy now that a lot of the new generation are going in for love marriages, and even if it fails at the long run, you've at least lived with someone you actually loved!

Sydney Long

@akshay Abuse and unhappiness isn't a small reason. When my parents divorced the family got wayyyyyy more peaceful. In fact I wish they separated years ago so their fights wouldnt have escalated so much.

akshay

that's based no one should divorce for small reason it impact the mind of your kids

Purple ⟬⟭ moacarat 💙💎

2y↑1

@Raihanna Jallow same here. Bcz if y'all want friends than be friends why gotta marry friends 😭

Raihanna Jallow

2y↑2

@Purple ⟬⟭ moacarat 💙💎 because imagine living with someone you don't love...arghhh it gives me the creeps😖

Purple ⟬⟭ moacarat 💙💎

2y↑9

Exactly! That's the whole point pro arranged people missed. I'd say love marriages are also risky no doubt but still better than arrange marriages with no choice of leaving it cuz of society.

32. Simone Bagaria

2y↑28

On low divorce rates:
1. Divorcees are shunned from society especially if they aren'r privileged (unlike Rina).
2. Women are dependent on their husbands for financial support, because of not being allowed to work or not having opportunities (unlike Rina).
3. Getting a divorce is expensive so it is not an option for most people (unlike Rina).
In conclusion, Rina is blinded by her privilege and is unable to see the pain of so many people in unhappy marriages because she has never had to deal with that or face the harsh reality.

Chelsea

3y↑16.5K

Low divorce rates are more a reflection of cultural or societal pressure to stay married than they are of a happy marriage 🤷‍♀️

Millsy Kooksy

I don’t agree with that completely. People who are committed to staying together and working through their difficulties and don’t want to get divorce are not losers for staying in a marriage

Big Rungus

ok american control your skyrocketing divorce rates

chintuZ

ive seen in usa many people marrying 6 times and then divorced 🤣🤣 average people in USA at least divorce 3 times and people saying arranged marriage is better than love marriage

Indranil Dutta

Says another western bootlicker

Abhishek

Most of the arranged marriage works there are always exception though

159 More Replies...

Jayesh

2y↑52

Rina's views are so based on "gora" validation. everytime she comes up with the America thingy or about her family, which seems to be very progressive and privileged.
She's so privileged that she's couldn't differentiate between caste difference and regional difference and changed the whole conversation to people marrying from different states and not castes.
I like Aastha's pov.

Rishita Chakraborty

3y↑33

The group here is more privileged than any average Indian. Not a correct representation of the entire population. I'm pro love and pro arranged marriage. Though I'll never go for arranged myself, I think people are different and they marry for different reasons. Some might do it for love whereas others will do it just for companionship. But what I'm against is forced marriage. And a lot of arranged marriages are forced in rural India and only happen within the same caste. Racism, Elitism and Dowry, also take root here.

Shaheen Shad

2y↑1

Tbh they represent the us demographics, cause most of them immigrating to us are from petty high privileged backgrounds.

trigi

2y↑7

In India, it’s not love that holds two unhappy people together. It’s fear of being alone that keeps two unhappy people together

alpaca 🦙

3y↑38

When I was 8 or 9 years old I was taken along with my family to meet a girl for my uncle, mid way she was taken into a room with a lady they were referring to as "doctor", after a while they came out and the doctor nodded and said "yes". As a child I never understood what truly happened in that moment but now as an 18 year old it sickens me that parents would put their children in such a situation where an entire family of strangers come intervene and judge you on the basis of your mere virginity. The people in this video have never truly experienced a typical arranged marriage and the shame and rejection and ostracization that comes with standing up for yourself and what you believe is right for you. Also, Aastha was always on point and articulate ❤️

alex47_in_downtown

Everyone is entitled to their own judgements & preferences...If men prefer virgin brides then it's their choice ultimately.

teudunggie

2y↑1

This is horrible

ruelia ju

2y↑1

gravityclarity

2y↑10

That's so denigrating and disgusting. That poor girl.

Gargi Jain

2y↑4

😔💔

Dhriti Menon

3y↑13.5K

The bottomline - In India, the difference between being able to choose between arranged marriage and love marriage is PRIVILEGE.

Indranil Dutta

@Dhriti Menon haha another western brainwashed lady welcome to Bharat

Indranil Dutta

And the word privilege is a hoax

Jefrrey Jeffery

Wait wtf? In Kashmir, courting (not arranged marriage) is common, but that system is dying with dating lol idk wtf you sayin'😭💀

suresh s

It is not just privilege. It is the only option some times, there are many that are unworthy of marriage both men and women.

Share Market Trader.

🥺🥺🥺

106 More Replies...

Ahmad Khan

2y↑31

I find it extremely funny as a Pakistani born Canadian who worked as a Pilot and used to travel extensively to India because white people think Urdu = Hindi, that individuals from the high-class or from the upper-class fail to see the plight of the middle and lower classes. I would routinely hang out with my Delhi friends who all without being dismissive since they are wonderful people come from well off families and are basically handling their family business. So not only are they born with silver spoons, they somehow have convinced themselves that since they work for their Dad's or Mom's business they somehow can accept the ego that comes from building something from nothing. It was always off-putting because they were driving around in AMGs, and 7 series while they are in their early twenties but they somehow feel like they have worked extremely hard and came from nothing and earned everything they have so they can understand and relate to the working class. The class system and subsequent privilege's in the Asian societies is night and day. The pro-arranged marriage individuals definitely come from the upper-class and therefore were more than likely arranged with other individuals from the upper-class, if the husband or wife did not fit their needs or interests, they can 1. Get money from their families to continue an independent lifestyle 2. Always can get a divorce and find a new partner. Both options aren't at all available to individuals in the rest of India.

There is a huge stigma around divorce, especially as it pertains to the reputation of a woman and it limits her prospects for an another marriage moving forward. More often than not, these women get trapped.

By all means that doesn't mean that I am diminishing the viewpoints of anyone, the pro-arranged marriage individuals who come from privilege look like lovely people they live in a more idealistic world and assume that everyone can live in it as well, unfortunately not a reality in a country like India and similar countries with similar cultures.

Zainab Farhan

I’m a Pashtun from KPK and I was also born and raised in Canada, so when I go back home I see so much of that. Your point about divorce is so true. Even in Pashtun culture, it’s so discouraged. You’re almost expected to live with the abuse you face

Nidhi Singh

3y↑70

The amount(no.) of people in the comment sections against arranged marriages itself speaks of how toxic this concept is actually in India and not how those 3 people think about it.

Tiffany Sparrow

2y↑40

Rina: arranged marriages are the best.

Also Rina: My arranged marriage failed and I'm divorced. But they are still the best esp bc my New York friends say so.

Bhavesh Tochabbra

3y↑55

Just because your arranged marriage worked, doesn't generalise every other arrange marriage.
Just because your love marriage is happy, doesn't generalise every love marriage end happily.

Shirin Hossain

3y↑4.6K

When that dude from matchmaking said that " arranged marriages do not perpetuate religious and class division " I laughed out loud
WATCH YOUR OWN SHOW HONEY.....

Don't screenshot my NFT

@Top Tech poor bait 🤡

Top Tech

@payal singhal happens from hindu boys to so what r u on? There are brainless ppl everywhere

Anushka XII- I, 13

Lol yeahh😂

payal singhal

3y↑4

@Shirin Hossain ok. But do u know that how many Hindu girls r betrayed by Muslim men in worst ways. I hope you know that there are many Muslim men who represent themselves as a hindu guy, makes a hindu girl fall in love with them blindly and then tell her that they are Muslim and if she wants to be with them, she would have to become a muslim. So do you think any parents will let their daughter fall in that whole?

Shilpa Mahato

Lol

22 More Replies...

D.H. Patel

3y↑28

Im indian and my parents got an arranged marriage. Even though they both cheat on each other, do not love each other, dont want to be together, they wont get divorced because my dad needs someone to take care of the kids and house, and my mom needs the finical support. theres a low divorce rate in indian couples out of necessity to be together and cultural upstanding, not because they love each other and want to be together.

Sooraj Chavan

2y↑16

The most Indian thing here was probably not the discussion or the topic of discussion but people talking over each other. Felt like home🤗🤗

Sai Nand Hebbar

3y↑58

I love my Generation
I love how we are being more sensitive towards some subtle-est feelings
I love how we are evolving aesthetically
When I said "Generation" I meant
Aastha and not the other:)

Norah Al

2y↑4

My marriage is considered “arranged” but I had a choice to meet him, spend time to get to know him and we were engaged for two years before we were actually married. During that time both parents knew that if either of us had an issue the arrangement would be off, no questions asked. I feel that because our intent from the get go was marriage we were very open and honest about our wants and desires and future visions of our relationship and there were no games in trying to impress one another. I do understand that some arranged marriages are not like that and I think it’s tragic to force someone to spend their life with someone they barely know.

Toshita Singh

3y↑4.5K

The divorce rate in India is low not because arranged marriages work out for people,
1. Its a taboo to get divorced
2. There are still many housewives who rely on their s/o to earn the money and parting ways will be difficult for them
3. Couples think it will leave a trauma on their child if they get divorced but the actual trauma is still continuing a failed marriage

alex47_in_downtown

Divorce is a slippery slope ultimately traumatizing children...people should be making wise partner choice in the first place & stop giving up on their marriage too early...life is not a lovey-dovey fairytale all the damn time.

Rupam Tiwari

@jacquline Samad lol 😂 that can happen in love marriges also like latest case amber and Jhonny depp

Jana :3

It’s incredibly taboo. I’m an Indian living in America and my mom looked down on my ex’s family because his biological parents aren’t together. Really awful views.

real real

2y↑2

I agree with you.. And in some cases the wife cannot go back to her parents house once she got married.. Therefore she is ending up her life with her husband but not experiencing happiness.. Divorce is scary for Indian people..

me me

and also it leaves a huge impact on children

32 More Replies...

rashi sharma

3y↑37

The dude pradhyuman said it right "in arranged marriages people are obliged to talk". What he doesn't know is that marriage should be with somebody who wants to talk to you, not someone who is obliged to talk to you.

deuterium tritium

3y↑27

I started the video supporting pro-arranged but this really changed my mind. Most pro points hold only when in a position of privilege. And even then, it is a gamble.

Maryam Aamer

3y↑40

I agree with what Aakanksha said in the start. "When you meet an arranged suitor, the environment where you are meeting is not natural". I belong to a conservative and religious Muslim family in Pakistan, and most marriages in my family have been arranged. Though it's true that very few ended in divorce, I haven't personally seen a relationship between couples that I envy. When you meet a possible partner, you act and talk and behave in ways you don't normally would so you never truly know that person until you finally marry them. And getting a divorce after that is a long and complicated process which could have been avoided if you had just observed or met that person in an everyday scenario.

Felipe

3y↑31

Those who are pro arranged marriage can't seem to deal with their own relationships at all. As if they always had to involve someone else in order to solve marital issues, because they're not emotionally mature to do that. It's as if they never grew up. Being an adult is all about taking responsabilities.

Ria Rai

3y↑4.7K

Rina's whole argument was based on " ik lot of people , ik lot of friends , my cousins , my nieces etc " like wtf ? Her source was basically"trust me bro"

She_wizzdom

@The 5th Wiggle she is not breaking any stereotype. Indians are not undergoing genetic transformation by moving to America, they are the same people doing the same thing in another country. What stereotype has this broken?

fay

i swear

Ishrat Jahan

@Yung Man it's a taboo in west cause most Europeans think arranged marriage is forced Marriage.

Cross Game

And everyone must have been forced and i don't believe everyone must be straight lol

Lily Arios

3y↑4

@Yung Man No, the success of marriage is when the married people are happy.

29 More Replies...

Iryn Boateng

2y↑11

You don't have to be on a dating app to be lied to and cheated on. You can introduce two people but there should be no pressure to marry the person. The young lady is making a lot more sense. The choice should be there.

RiCh

2y↑36

Pankhuri: stands pro-arranged marriage.

Also Pankhuri: sounds more like she's anti-arranged marriage

AsasinoManik Clips

2y↑5

I have one small pro argument for arranged marriages is that first, it's harder for many people to spend time on relationships/socializing , as some people are shy and not convenient in initiating relationships due to their looks, confidence or occupied in career etc. And secondly if there's a gap of 2-3 months before marriage after an engagement, so it would be way easier for both of them to cancel the marriage if something's a deal breaker.
I just think that going relationship thing might doesn't work with every kind of person.

Paula Caffey

3y↑17

Very, very interesting discussions. It’s hard to determine any side victorious because each person’s perspective seems unique to their socio-economic class and personality, and so that obviously shapes their side of this debate. For the three people pro-arranged, two of them strike me as being strong enough in their position- and privileged enough socially-economically- that an arranged marriage for them would be more of an exclusive match-making. I would have appreciated that myself. The youngest there, Aastha, had very, very sound insights. Really appreciated her voice and agency. But my conclusion at the end - arranged marriages via legit match making is a very useful tool for those who have the fortitude and maturity to still be selective. For those who do not have these privileges and qualities, the person is at great risk, women especially. As a Westerner, I would be interested to hear a discussion on marriage equity, integrity in marriage and in partner selection whether arranged or love. In the US, love marriages here really suffer due to the delusions of this society and the inequities still prevalent. And women who are in low & high social-economic status can suffer greatly in any marriage here where there is economic or psychological dependence.

She_wizzdom

3y↑4.4K

Basically what pradyumn said is that real relationships take too much effort to build so I'll just depend on mumma papa to select a girl for me, minus the effort and risk

Golden Juventino

You sound like a conservative. You're forcing other people to live how you think the society should be and not let them do what they want to do

Anonymous

and what's wrong with it?

She_wizzdom

2y↑2

@Nidhi arranged marriage deserves criticism because it is usually carried out under extreme social pressure and emotional blackmailing. Pradyumn is just a cowardly guy who cannot face the consequences of his emotions and would rather blame his parents than himself.

Nidhi

@She_wizzdom I think what he means to say is he’d rather have an arranged marriage than to have multiple heartbreaks and end up being depressed. Investing time, energy, emotions in a partner and then having a breakup can be very difficult to deal with. It also makes you hopeless and lose interest.
I believe that love/arrange marriage should be a choice and either side should not judge or demean the other side

CynicalIdealist1111

@EndlessMagic 〈7 What a shitty thing to say to someone simply because they hold an opinion that you don't share, especially since that opinion doesn't impact your life in any way whatsoever.

56 More Replies...

vaishali verma

2y↑8

Aastha here spitting facts like no ones business!! And loved how being the youngest of the group she still shared points that are more hollistic and universal rather than the narrow perspective these 10 12 years of her senior hold.

Blessed life

2y↑8

I think arranged marriage is not evil. It's pretty much a formal way of dating these days bc you still have the freedom to say no. But I reflect that having this ability to say no is a privilege when it shouldnt be. Forcing arranged marriage on people is what gives it a bad rep and honestly that truly sucks.

Gourinandana J

3y↑18

Let's get this straight the percentage of divorce within arranged marriage people are less because of the pressure from the family to adjust to even the harshest of treatments . Physical and mental abuse
Mainly related to dowry .

Jessica Solomon

2y↑6

This is such a foreign concept to me. I honestly wouldn't have an issue with an arranged marriage as long as it isn't forced. The specifics of this topic really change the whole view point. The details is what makes this so controversial and even hated.

Amy Grace Ganta

3y↑5.7K

I love the fact that Aastha called out Rina and Pradhyuman’s privilege. They are exceptions to the whole process . A vast number of people live in quite the opposite of what they’re talking about.

S

As if Aastha is less privileged.
It's not fault of Rina & Praduman that they are Privileged. Real unprivileged people don't even get the chance of Labellimg people Priviledged or Non Privileged

ElectricSoul

and they got so triggered lol

Bruce Wayne

@GTR Rohit re read my comment at least thrice and try to understand what I mean

GTR Rohit

@Bruce Wayne never because my family hasn't been forced

Yung Man

@Micah Jordan Lol, same can be said from the other side.

23 More Replies...

Aiswarya Aravind M K

3y↑19

I felt like the pro arranged marriage people are playing it safe ... They can't take the responsibility of making the "mistake" of being in love with the wrong person... like If they had an arranged marriage and the partner turns out to be not compatible , then getting a divorce is ok.. but having a brkup or having a divorce after love marriage isn't acceptable 😅

Govind R N

2y↑13

Died at 12:00. Aastha literally just told that them their personal experiences aren't close to the reality in India and the lady proceeds to tell her about her family.

Ayush Thumbarathy

3y↑79

"Arranged marriage really helps, because the person is constantly obliged."

Self burn, guys. Those are rare.

Moushumi Hazra

Time stamp??

SUSHIL TIRKEY

3y↑3

It's like love marriages don't make you responsible and obliged at all by that vague statement in the video.

Resham Gattani

3y↑23

Aastha presents herself so well, a very well spoken woman💕

Angela Ha

3y↑2.1K

It wouldn't be a problem if your parents introduced someone to you, but it is a problem when you are forced into marrying someone.

Unicorn Onion

or when you're not allowed to marry anyone you choose

nischal tyagi

Yeah true

Manit Doshi

that forced marriage, not arranged.

Tom And Jerry

3y↑1

But it india the process is really toxic the arrange marriage

Ashcool

@aShowStoppinNumber "Love" is a relative feeling. Did you love your sibling when you first met them as a baby? Probably you hated each other, fought a lot as kids but you eventually grew to love them because you're around them all the time and you grew used to them.
Human beings are not jigsaw pieces which have to perfectly set with another jigsaw piece. If you live in close proximity to someone, you actually make an effort and you properly communicate to them what you want, then you can love anyone. It's not that hard to find.

13 More Replies...

Ananya Dey

3y↑15

I think arranged marriage is alright as long as the bride and groom get the choice.

Ur Mom

3y↑8

My aunt was married to a guy a few years back. It was arranged. They didn’t know each other before. But after marriage he started to shed his true colors. He was sexist, mean just all the bad stuff. No abuse(I think…hopefully). But lots of toxic masculinity and control etc. she left him in literally 2-3 weeks. Got divorced a year later. She’s late 30’s and still isn’t married. She suffers from bipolar disorder and…yea. The arranged marriage ruined her life in a way. No bachelor would want to marry a woman who’s a divorcee. Her best bet is to marry a guy who also divorced.

خضر علی خان (Khizar Ali Khan)

2y↑4

Absolutely loved it. In India,this open talking should be promoted. Literally people have some assumptions about somebody/some caste/race/religion and they don't speak it out to them and keep it in themselves only. That's the main cause of all those clashes happening by those misinterpretations and trusting the only source of information,i.e.,the Media.

Adél H.

2y↑7

This is the first time I see a group of indians “arguing/discussing a topic” while patiently listening tho the other person to finish the sentence they were saying. If you ever saw a political discussion on the indian news, you know what I am talking about.
Great video by the way!

Priyanshu Pradyot

😂😂😂😂😂😂

Cari Robinson

3y↑8.3K

I feel the youngest lady was openly disrespected, spoken over, and dismissed during the conversations and I think that made her point very clearly.

kiss me

2y↑1

No she wasn't. She just didn't have anything interesting to say

sriya jasmine

@Rupam Tiwari sometimes the best they think may not be the best she actually wanted..

nah cause wth

2y↑1

@Rupam Tiwari not all parents

Rupam Tiwari

2y↑1

@nah cause wth but parents want best for their daughter

Partha Ghosh

U mean the lady in black...i thoroughly support her...

28 More Replies...

Min mi

2y↑4

The young girl rolling her eyes was me. She just made the perfect points at perfect time. Absolutely in love with her opinions.

Sri V

2y↑6

I see a lot of people in the comments (and the video) confusing “arranged” marriage with “forced” marriage. Arranged marriages can and do work, absolutely. Forced marriages, whether blatant or put in a box and wrapped neatly with the label of “arranged” marriage, will never work. Unless there’s great compromise and change on one or both sides I suppose, but that scenario’s an outlier in the dataset.

Steel

I agree with you, but no one is "confusing" those two terms, they are already used interchangeably by society and the older generation. 99.9 % of parents that arrange marriages of their kids will never want to call it a "forced marriage". Next time you are at an arranged marrage wedding, try calling it a "forced marriage" they'll kick u out or shame you for badmouthing them and will try to convince you how the marriage isnt forced and just a "traditional arranged marriage" because they are "people of culture and values" and they'll try to convince you how both the bride and groom really really really reallyyyyy like each other, and this is totally not from societal pressure.

Codename:HoeNextDoor

3y↑24

"Privilege is invisible to those who have it"

Bhabna Kashyap

2y↑7

Rina talks about young people having negative experiences like heartbreak and betrayal as if they won't experience such things in an arranged marriage, also to grow as a person and understand human nature you need to have those experiences, not shelter yourself. That's like the person who stayed in his room because he was afraid he'll get into an accident if he steps out and ultimately the painting on top of his head falls on him and kills him.

Em

3y↑2.3K

I think Aastha realised real quick that the others views were coming from a place of privilege and that they wouldn’t except or understand a balanced argument because of their experiences

irish

@R3DF4NG yep honestly the picked the worst three pro arranged marriage, i’d be interesting to see what someone who is mot privileged say about arrange marriage and why they think it’s acceptable rather than hearing two very privileged people talk solely based on their own experiences and not society as a whole. i dont even want to talk about the dude, he’s just pathetic.

R3DF4NG

Perhaps they should have got a good mix of privilege and unprivileged folks, you can't really blame the 6 people, the producer should have thought this through.

here to just vibe

3y↑3

she was my favorite speaker.

Dorina de Jonge

3y↑2

@Jareth Thompson totally with you on this one, but having lived in India, speaking this level of English will mean privilege bubble, no other way to put it. Would have watched it with subtitles though personally.

moon.

3y↑12

@SuptnikSS oof I agree with you. Perhaps my example was extreme. It just felt like the woman was being rather ignorant and unaware of her privilege. You're right, love marriage is not a formula for happy marriage, but it does offer more freedom and room to grow then arranged marriages. I just think that when you are in a debate or discussion, you need to have multiple examples and facts on why you're right, but this woman continuously used herself and only herself as a prime example on why arranged marriages are better. It makes her arguement look weak, and hence I do not feel an inclination to support her. Even the other woman(the older one who was in support or arranged marriages and who constantly cut people off) had more diverse examples but the make up artist constantly talked only about herself.

7 More Replies...

Medha

3y↑34

The lady in the white kurti and high heels rubs me the wrong way. the hypocrisy is just unbelievable. How are you going to give examples from your personal life to defend your stance, but then criticise others when they do the same????

irish

3y↑3

not to mention isnt she lying... she said she have nieces friends etc who succeeded in arrange marriages but then say she’s the only one who got arranged for marriage. like she’s so ridiculous

TK

2y↑4

It is so disheartening to see how the privileged folks will refuse to see/believe that that they are privileged and are so unopen to listening to views that differ from theirs. Aastha is the most intelligent and eloquently spoken out of everyone there.

Vaganista

2y↑4

Having and arranged marriage is completely fine and it works it out for many people but their arguments were weak and didn’t make any sense, marriage is different for everyone sometimes arranged marriages work sometimes they don’t, there are many factors that play into that.

Blaze Carlton

2y↑6

Pradhyuman basically said "Arranged marriages are great bc the other person is obliged to listen to me" ..

Audrey Do

3y↑3.5K

Rina: arranged marriage is the best, I recommend it for everyone and it worked excellently for me and it will for you too
Also Rina: I am divorced

Dazzling Wings

@Rohan Dick and from my personal experience I know a couple who are happy in their love marriage...what are u telling is just an ancedote

Tanisha

Ritu Singh

@Seira H yes, it is a taboo. If someone thinks about divorce in india, mostly people around them, including their families say "Just adjust, don't be dramatic" or "who's gonna marry u if u get divorced? No one wants a divorced woman" etc. And because of this taboo, woman who are divorced are considered "too bold and bitchy" and aren't preferred...it's honestly sad.

Ritu Singh

3y↑1

@Tarun Singh most arranged marriages don't end in divorce because
1. Divorce is a taboo in india. Many few people would marry a divorced woman (people are narrow minded)

2. Most women in india are not educated enough to earn to make a livelihood, or are brainwashed into believing that they can't live on their own. Have u heard about the domestic violence rate? It's a lot.

3. Most couples i know (arranged marriage couples) never agree on stuff because they are of completely opposite personalities, and were married off by their families on basis of caste, looks, and money.

Overall, the reason for less divorce in arranged marriage is not because the couple is happy, but it is the narrow mindedness of the society, and helplessness

33 More Replies...

blink tambo25

3y↑58

Suvir: "No you let me complete please ,sorry " he definetly put her in her place 😂😂 15:13

madeline salazar

And then spoke facts

Deepthi Vasishta

3y↑18

Arranged marriages in a normal functional
Family who respect each other’s choices could be perfectly used as a platform to meet people and that’s privilege.
In a dysfunctional family where they care more about society and treat kids like property that’s when arranged marriages are more like a business deal. So the name “arranged marriage” cannot be defined in just one perspective.

Swathy Sree R

3y↑5

I am not against the arranged marriages but it comes with a cost especially for women. Still fighting for basic rights like education and career. Still we have to get permission or explain these basic things to the groom's family. And only few agree and most don't. Why should I risk it? I had a horrible experience in this process one lady asked that she need a house help for her son. She mentioned it as house help not even housewife. I am a civil engineer with 3yrs experience in the relevant field and I want to pursue my master's. Why should I accept this mentality?

LoneWolf.S.N.

2y↑4

Arranged marriage is a back up option for someone who can't find their Love.. Simple! End of conversation🤧

Lokesh Dharmani

3y↑1.8K

The youngest was the wisest. The most balanced. And the most matured. Aastha, if you are reading this, you were a star!!! Loved how patiently you heard everyone and put your reasoned out arguments with such clarity and conviction. Glad to see such bright young people have such refined progressive thoughts. You actually reminded me of my niece.

The Announcer

@Godslave ! Nah G, that's incorrect Expierence is the best teacher, stop being arrogant

The Announcer

@Lyn Again nothing to do with age but expierence. You can't really understand the hardships a elite athlete faces unless you;ve gone through it yourself.

Godslave !

3y↑2

@mxo bro ,ur age doesn't define ur wisdom ,ok , there r a lot old ones who talk foolishness and little ones who can blow ur mind with their simple logical opinion , not every older persons hve a lot of worthful experience same goes to little ones who maybe hve little experience but there experience value maybe much Higher than any olderones, ur an indian guy who typically judge on what u see firstly rather than what u hear from the little ones

Lyn

3y↑7

@mxo you do know that more experience doesn't mean more wisdom. Just because someone is older, doesn't mean they're wiser. She is wise because of her mindset and makes good judgement.

TheMamba

3y↑5

Agree, she was extremely articulate, balanced, and I was impressed by her wisdom on the subject.

16 More Replies...

Divya Kris

3y↑9

I would have loved to have seen some people from other regions of India, like South India, as their experiences are usually different.

Aathira Jayan

3y↑6

I feel more younger people should be given opportunities in this platform because they ARE the future. Also they understand the seriousness of what they are doing when given this chance and actually communicate better and not make it a typical news channel debate. Debates are to provide the different sides of a topic and NOT to derive a conclusion. It always lies in the hands of the person listening to this on what decision they want to make on the topic discussed.

Vera Kitten

3y↑12

There are literal children that are forced to marry old men and women. It is not ok to put a child in that sort of situation they need to grow to learn to love who they want to and to strip them of that is one of the most vile things a person can do

madeline salazar

2y↑1

EXACTLY

MM02

2y↑3

What constitutes an arranged marriage? Is it forced marriage due to parents, or can it just be that your parents choose a partner and you guys get to know each other and decide later? If it’s the latter then I don’t see an issue because a lot of people struggle to meet new people by themselves anyways, but if it’s forced and either side barely know each other then that’s bad

Tanya Joshi

3y↑4.7K

Rina's whole personality trait is " It never happened to me so therefore it must not exist".

Avinash Tiwari

Same thing can be said about astha, since it does not happen to me , it is not happening to others

Tanisha

Peace

Isn't it the same with pankhuri? "Because i was rejected two times during arrange marriage, therefore it must be happening with everyone".

27 More Replies...

Roshni J

2y↑1

Personally for me, I really don't like the label of anti arrange marriage and pro arrange marriage because I stand a neutral ground for it. There are pro's and con's to both of them. I would have loved to see a person who is both open to the idea of love and arrange marriage have this discussion.

AD Queen

3y↑4

Keeping my mind opened... the principle of being set up with a person that you already know has similar values, interests, background... doesn't seem so bad. And to know this person is there with the same interest to actually meet each other seems nice.
But in reality... I don't think people stick to just that principle and sadly bring in much toxicity

hemanth srivathsav

2y↑7

Jubliee should definitly do more of some middle ground videos in india on different topics

Harsha

2y↑3

I really don’t understand why people label marriages as “arranged marriage” or “love marriage”. Marriages are always arranged, the only question lies in how is it arranged? Or who is arranging??. So the very concept of labelling marriage as arranged or love is something that really does not exist.
We are blindly debating or forming opinions on something that does not even exist.

sharad hotha

3y↑3K

Pradhyuman earlier embarrassed himself in front of only the Indian audience. Now, he's on to do it in front of a global one. That's personal growth.

gravityclarity

🤣🤣🤣

Esther K

😆🤣😂😂🤣😆😆🤣😂😂🤣😆🤣🤣😂😂🤣🤣😆🤣🤣😂😂😂😂🤣🤣😆😆🤣😂😂😂🤣😆🤣😂😂🤣😆🤣😂😂🤣😆I’m embarrassed for him

Dyuti Biswas

@Skinny Buddha Tell me, what do you understand by "arranged marriage"? Two families meeting each other, deciding the marriage over tea and then the girl and boy get married straight away? Are you living in the 70s or something? Better stuff it.

Dyuti Biswas

@Skinny Buddha Dude, can you just shut your trap. You clearly know nothing about arranged marriages. 90% of arranged marriages are perfectly consensual.

Ani vlogs

I can't stop laughing

58 More Replies...

IlostMyJamToJim

3y↑8

as rina said bout conservative family, I come from a non-conservative "so-called upper class" family, and still many people in my family believe that we should prefer "upper cast" for arrange marriage(according to them if it's love marriage then it's okay), and says that we should go for outer-cast marriage only if we're getting older and don't have any option left. It's not about the conservative family it's just that the whole concept of having a life partner is rigid in arrange marriages

Ms Lady

2y↑4

Damn, when not all agreed that marriage can be about love, idk... I lmao'd to those two who had'nt agreed. Marriage without love is basically just situationship not marriage at all 😂.

Kuziva J. Z

3y↑2

If this discussion wasn't so anecdotal, they could have really looked at the definition of arranged marriage and it's pros and cons. It seemed like people were trying to debate and prove why their personal decisions were right instead of understanding the whole topic.

Equaliser19

3y↑13

I studied in DELHI UNIVERSITY and all the people I know were in a relationship it's one of the most prestigious University in India and trust me 99% of them hide their relationship from their parents. ..... I know most of us has been gone through this....
So first we need to normalise dating atleast 😂 then take the discussion to marriage..... So dating is still a taboo for many Indians .... But on the other hand things are changing ❤️ I am hoping for the best ....

SSthegamer 27✔️

disgusting

Sagarika Suresh

3y↑1.9K

Aastha was the most mature person, calling them out but also trying to be respectful. It was downright mean of Rina to invalidate the newspaper experience. The man on the anti-arranged side had a lot of valid points. Pankhuri definitely tried to understand and represented her side well. It was annoying to watch Rina and Pradhyuman.

Snow Key

And 70% of the debate was covered by their narcissistic and nonsense talks.

Moushumi Hazra

2y↑12

@mxo bruh she's 22...
In India at this age relatives come to your house and begin the rant of "GET MARRIED SOON" ofc she should be included!!!
And this shows how JUBILEE respects the opinions of gen z individuals too unlike some ignorant Indian elders saying "yOu'Re tOo yOuNg tO uNdErStAnD tHiS sTuFf" let alone respecting opinions🤷🏻‍♀️

Tanvi Vuradi

3y↑1

@mxo I agree. Everyone's hating on Rina because she mentions experiences of her friends/acquaintances living abroad whereas Aastha speaks about her friend's bad experience from years ago, a friend who was rushed to get marry by her parents, somehow analyzing there's no love in arranged marriages of her friend's parents.

Jevita Maria Saldanha

3y↑1

@One True Sky Daddy still the majority hun.

R S

3y↑1

@mxo Totally agree with you

9 More Replies...

Detox with P-Talks Official

2y↑2

I love these conversations where everyone gets to speak and patiently listen to others despite their varying opinions.

Ashwin selvakumar

2y↑3

This whole video needs to be filmed again with people of varying backgrounds. Of which should include those of lesser privilege.

onelifekingsize Gaurav

2y↑7

When Rina said ' I'm divorced' my initial reaction was 'no wonder why'.

DSA

2y↑2

its fine to be for or against something, just don't demonize the other side and be unrealistic.

Ilinca-Gabriela

3y↑5.4K

My guy is pro arranged marriages cause that way he can't be ghosted.. 🙄

Mara Miau

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

RociGranados

😭😭😭😭😭

gravityclarity

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Star 123

Says the dude with the teddy bear 🧸 shirt

CynicalIdealist1111

2y↑2

I don't have strong feelings one way or the other in this debate but after reading the comments here I have to ask, why is it acceptable to ridicule and shame someone for having bad luck with dating? A lot of people struggle with it especially if they have severe social anxiety or traumatic past experiences.

88 More Replies...

Anony -mous

2y↑5

Astha's look at 12:23 is literally me. These people obviously come from a very privileged place and seem to have a disconnect with reality in India 😭😭

Sudha Singh

2y↑4

This discussion was so Indian. Everyone talking over each other. High pitched voices winning against low pitched ones. One sensible person only talking when asked to.

k s

2y↑3

We arranged marriage for my sister and it's out of caste. While finding for a match, we came across maximum matches which were inter-caste. We arnt Brahmins and we even got few matches from Brahmins.
P.S. I particularly gave e.g. "Brahmins" becoz they are considered to be very rigid and conservative.

Afrin Khan

2y↑3

so we actually really just had three highly privileged people speak about why they're pro-arranged marriage when they make up hardly 20% of the entire indian population? literally only the anti-arranged marriage people made sense because they talked about actual indian ground realities.

Load More Comments...

More Comments

just now