Out of the blue
Astarti String Orchestra Lyrics

I'm a man without a soul...Honey---
I feel like I have no sense of purpose or direction, my life feels empty and meaningless.

Who lost it while parading it, in a town full of thieves--
I lost my sense of self while trying to show it off to people who didn't care and were only looking out for themselves.

why'see I didn't want to be with any people I know.
I felt disconnected from the people I knew and wanted to escape from their judgment and influence.

But god knows, I didn't want to be alone--
Despite wanting to leave the people I knew, I didn't want to be completely isolated and craved human connection.

So I showered down--left my little room
I took a shower and left my small, familiar space to embark on an unknown adventure.

And jumped in my car for protection from hostility
I got in my car to feel safe and secure from any potential danger or unfriendly people.

Well it ain't easy to be bold--in an unknown city--
Being brave and confident in a new and unfamiliar environment is a difficult feat.

I was feeling strong mouthed, but weak willed.
I had a lot of talk and bravado, but lacked the true strength and willpower to follow through.

When I ran into the cure...for my ills--
When I met this woman, I felt like she could heal me and fill the void in my life.

Don't tell me what your name is--
I don't need to know your name, I just want to be with you physically without any emotional attachment.

I want your body, not your mind,
I am only interested in having a physical relationship with you and don't care about your thoughts or feelings.

I want a feeling, worth paying for before I say goodbye
Before I leave, I want to feel something memorable and valuable from our encounter.

But as I was talking, I couldn't look her in the eyes,
Even though I was engaging with her, I couldn't truly connect with her emotionally or fully acknowledge her as a person.

I just kept wondering,--
My mind was preoccupied with thoughts and doubts.

How many men unleashed their frustration between her thighs?
I couldn't get past the idea of other men being with her before me and it was fueling my insecurity and doubt.

Well my adrenalin, was curdling like cream,
My adrenaline was pumping so vigorously that it was making me physically and emotionally uneasy.

as I was being led by the hand.
She was leading me to an unknown destination, which made me feel vulnerable and unsure.

through the sound of sirens--
Within the chaos and noise of the city, emergency sirens were blaring in the distance.

and the distant noise of some drunken jazz band,
Alongside the sirens, I could hear the sounds of a jazz band in the distance that only added to the city's overwhelming noise.

through the stench of disinfectant--that "INFECTED" my head,
There was a strong smell of disinfectant which felt almost overpowering and was disorienting my senses.

through the darkness of a corridor and into a strangers bed.
She led me through a dimly lit hallway and into a room where I was about to have a physical encounter with someone I didn't really know.

Well I didn't want to hurt your feelings, honey but I couldn't suppress my own,
I didn't want to upset or disappoint her, but I also couldn't ignore my own feelings and desires.

I had to pull myself outta this nosedive by proving something to myself.
I needed to pull myself out of this negative spiral and regain control over my life by taking action that would prove something to myself.

She was lying on her back with her lips parted.
She was laying down on her back and her mouth was slightly open.

Squealing like a stuffed pig--
She was making loud noises that sounded like a high-pitched squeal.

I was going through the motions faking the emotions,
I was simply going through the physical motions and pretending to have emotions.

and wriggling around like lizard in a tin.
My movements were awkward and jerky, like a lizard trapped in a confined space.

Trying so hard to cleanse myself, I was turning into somebody else.
I was attempting to rid myself of negative feelings by engaging in this encounter, but in doing so I was losing a part of myself and becoming someone different.

I was trying so hard to please myself, I was turning into somebody else.
I was so focused on my own pleasure and fulfillment that I was losing my sense of identity and becoming someone different.

I was trying so hard to be myself, I was turning into somebody else.
In a strange way, trying too hard to be myself was pushing me further away from who I truly was and turning me into someone else.

Come my love--with your desire--
Come to me with your physical desire and passion.

Out of the blue...and into the fire!!
Our encounter started unexpectedly and will end in intense passion and pleasure.