Outside
Bandanabloom Lyrics

Feet slamming on the cement
I'm walking quickly and heavily on the concrete

These tasks taller than the trees I feed off of for breath
The challenges I face are overwhelming and vital to my existence

I'm all defeated I can't even be bothered to process
I feel defeated and cannot summon the energy to think about my situation

If I can't help you I'm just here to merely offer respect
If I can't do anything to help, I can only show my respect and support

Just want a small utilitarian space
I desire a simple and practical place to live

Somewhere nobody's there to tamper
I want to be in a location where no one will interfere or meddle with me

With my plans to decay inside a bedroom
I have no motivation to pursue my goals and feel like I'm wasting away in my room

Mourning songs from bands I banned from my brain
I listen to music that reminds me of sadness and pain, which I've tried to avoid

Some of the trust I had for friends
I've lost trust in some of my friends

I'm like a phantom in present, when light is ample I fade
I feel like a ghost, disappearing when there's more light and attention on me

No pluck, the damn antonym of mandolin playing
I lack courage and energy, the opposite of the lively sound of a mandolin

It's an advanced type of antsy
I feel restless and uneasy in a complex way

I've been prancing in place until my feet are sore
I've been moving around in place for so long that my feet hurt

I'm fiending for a handsomer face
I desire a more attractive appearance

And someone with a trustworthy fucking hand
I need someone with a reliable and truthful character

I could take like colonizers and others lands
I feel like I could conquer and take ownership like colonizers did with other countries' lands

Deprived of a mother since a youngin
I haven't had a mother figure since I was young

Maybe that's why loves hard to understand
Maybe that's why I have a hard time comprehending what love really is

It's not like that's on purpose, shouldn't worry so much
It's not my fault, and I shouldn't worry too much about it

If I could take the tiny burden of some hurt in my fun
If I could bear some pain while having fun, maybe life would be more bearable

Might not be so dark outside
Maybe things wouldn't be so gloomy and bleak

It's dark outside
It's nighttime and dark out

My brain's partway fried
My mind is partly fried, exhausted or not functioning properly

The paint's all but dry
The paint is almost dry, but not quite

And this a march disguise
I'm wearing a disguise like a mask or costume

I had a chip on my shoulder
I used to hold anger or resentment towards others, usually from past experiences

Said I would kill for it back (Kill for it back)
I wanted those feelings back so badly that I would do anything for it

Now I would leave the shit for vultures
Now I want to let go of that negativity and leave it for others like vultures to deal with

Need my skills all intact
I need to have all my abilities and talents in working order

I think I'm out of my noggin
I think I'm going crazy or losing my mind

I'm tryna talk to a shrink
I'm trying to talk to a therapist or psychiatrist

These tricks is dirty as the germs I'm washin off in my sink
These situations and people are just as dirty and diseased as the germs I'm cleaning off in my sink

I'm gonna throw my fucking phone into some squalid canal
I feel like getting rid of my phone by throwing it into a dirty and polluted canal

And you can catch me on a farm with the cows (Farm with the cows)
I'd rather be on a farm with cows than dealing with technology and people

I'd live off crops I'd grow and carcasses I'd char like an arsonist
I would survive off crops I grew and animals I burned like an arsonist

Then my mental state might not be caught in Arbiter's Grounds
Then I might not feel trapped and hopeless in my current mental state

Might start calming me down
That experience could help me relax and feel better

Cause it's so difficult imagining peace (Imagining peace)
It's hard to picture a peaceful and tranquil existence

And all I'm worried about is if my practice match what I preach
I'm concerned if my actions reflect the ideals and beliefs I uphold

Cause I think everybody's clashing with me irrationally
I feel like everyone is arguing and disagreeing with me without reason

And I'm tasked with starting class in a week
I have a responsibility to start teaching a class in a week

Getting better being Max, but I think Max isn't me (Max isn't me)
I'm trying to improve and become a better version of myself, but I'm not sure if that version is really who I am

I can't get up until noon
I can't wake up and get out of bed until noon

And Tempo's taxing to be (Taxing to be)
Being in a high-pressure situation that requires quick thinking and fast reactions is mentally and emotionally exhausting

Just tryna harvest these dollars to ensure that my friends have rations to eat
I'm working hard to make money so my friends can have enough food to eat

Cause I'll be damned if I'm attached to my needs
I refuse to be bound or limited by my own personal desires or wants

And this a March disguise
I'm hiding behind a disguise during the month of March