I Live With It Everyday
Barenaked Ladies Lyrics


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On August first, nineteen eighty one
I cycled to Scott's house with a BB gun
We were almost twelve, but we looked thirteen
He had baby-blue eyes that I shot him between
Nature provides for us a safety net
Whatever we do, we can never forget

I live with it every day
Even though we moved away
Our yesterdays are on a loop
A marathon of heartbreaking moments

The day they found me asleep on the floor
Engine running, closed garage door
Was the day the 'For Sale' sign arrived on the lawn
Two weeks later, and we were gone
Everyone falls through time and the funnel it makes
But I'm staying here inside my biggest mistake

I live with it every day
Even though we moved away
Our yesterdays are on a loop
A marathon of heartbreaking moments
I live with it every day
For every step I have to pay
The only thing that they can't take
The guilt that spirals in my wake

The love I put away
Like games that children play
The hearts you choose to break
Like cars dumped in the lake
The laugh lines on your face
The life I won't embrace
The cold house I won't leave
The guests I won't receive

I live with it every day
Even though we moved away
Our yesterdays are on a loop
A marathon of heartbreaking moments
I live with it every day
For every step I have to pay




The only thing that they can't take
The guilt that spirals in my wake

Overall Meaning

The lyrics to "I Live With It Every Day" by Barenaked Ladies describe the haunting memory of a childhood mistake that stays with the singer for their entire life, no matter how much time passes or how much they try to move on. The first verse tells the story of a youthful act of violence committed by the singer and a friend, and the fact that this memory still haunts the singer is emphasized by the repetition of the line "I live with it every day." The second verse describes a moment in the singer's adult life when they tried to commit suicide, but were interrupted by the arrival of a real estate agent to put a "For Sale" sign in the yard. The singer is still trapped in the memory of their past mistake and the guilt that comes with it, unable to move on and embrace life in the present.


The chorus repeats the line "I live with it every day" and adds the phrase "our yesterdays are on a loop," emphasizing the inescapable nature of the singer's memories. The second half of the chorus adds the line "for every step I have to pay," again emphasizing the weight of the singer's guilt. The final verse consists of a series of images of things the singer won't embrace or accept, all seemingly related to the guilt and shame they feel about their past mistake.


Overall, "I Live With It Every Day" is a dark and introspective song that examines the idea of being haunted by one's past actions. The lyrics suggest that while time may pass and circumstances may change, some mistakes are so significant that they can never truly be left behind.


Line by Line Meaning

On August first, nineteen eighty one
The specific date of the event that still haunts the singer.


I cycled to Scott's house with a BB gun
The singer and a friend went to someone's house with a dangerous weapon.


We were almost twelve, but we looked thirteen
Although the singer and friend were young, they appeared older than their actual age.


He had baby-blue eyes that I shot him between
The artist shot a person with a BB gun between their eyes, causing significant harm or possibly death.


Nature provides for us a safety net
Regardless of what we do, there are always consequences and risks associated with our actions.


Whatever we do, we can never forget
Reinforcing the theme that actions have consequences and the singer has a haunting memory that will not go away.


I live with it every day
The singer lives with the guilt and consequences of their action every day after the event that they are describing.


Even though we moved away
Despite the physical distance from the event, the artist still feels the guilt and weight of what they have done.


Our yesterdays are on a loop
This haunting and traumatic event is not something that the artist can forget or move on from, and it feels like they are stuck in a cycle of reliving it over and over again.


A marathon of heartbreaking moments
The entirety of the artist's past is full of painful memories associated with this particular event, and it feels like they are running a marathon of negative experiences.


The day they found me asleep on the floor
Another tragic memory associated with the event, perhaps indicating that the singer has turned to unhealthy coping mechanisms to deal with their guilt and trauma.


Engine running, closed garage door
Implies that the artist was attempting suicide or self-harm as a result of the guilt they are experiencing.


Was the day the 'For Sale' sign arrived on the lawn
This is likely a reference to the family moving away from the scene of the crime after the singer attempted self-harm.


Two weeks later, and we were gone
Reinforces the idea that the singer was forced to move away from the traumatic event they experienced as a result of their actions.


Everyone falls through time and the funnel it makes
A commentary on the inevitability of time and how it 'funnels' us all towards our eventual end.


But I'm staying here inside my biggest mistake
The artist is unable to move past what they have done and feel trapped inside the guilt and trauma caused by their actions.


For every step I have to pay
The artist is still facing the consequences of their action every day.


The only thing that they can't take
Despite the harm caused by the singer's action, the one thing that no one can take away from them is the guilt they feel.


The guilt that spirals in my wake
The guilt the singer feels is overwhelming and all-consuming, following them everywhere they go.


The love I put away
The artist may be referring to their inability to love themselves or someone else as a result of the guilt they are experiencing.


Like games that children play
The artist may feel that their actions were a childish game that had irreversible consequences, causing them to feel guilty and responsible.


The hearts you choose to break
The artist may be referencing the harm they caused to the victim and the loved ones of the victim as a result of their mistake.


Like cars dumped in the lake
The singer is making a comparison to something that is lost, unretrievable, and impossible to fix or change - much like the damage they have caused.


The laugh lines on your face
The artist may be reflecting on the happy times they have had and feel guilty for their actions leading to the people they harmed losing the ability to smile or laugh easily.


The life I won't embrace
The singer may feel unable to accept themselves or the world around them as a result of their guilt and trauma.


The cold house I won't leave
The singer feels trapped in their guilt and is unable to leave a place of painful memories and reminders of the event.


The guests I won't receive
The singer is unable to move on from the tragic event and is effectively isolating themselves from the rest of the world.




Lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
Written by: Steven Page, Stephen Duffy

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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