If I Had $1000000
Barenaked Ladies Lyrics


If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a house (I would buy you a house)
And if I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you furniture for your house (maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman)
And if I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a K-Car (a nice reliant automobile)
And if I had a million dollars I'd buy your love

If I had a million dollars (I'd build a tree fort in our yard)
If I had a million dollars (you could help, it wouldn't be that hard)
If I had a million dollars (maybe we could put a little tiny refrigerator in there somewhere)

(You know we could just go up there and hang out)
(Like open the fridge and stuff and there'd all be foods laid out for us)
(With little pre-wrapped sausages and things, mmm)
(They have pre-wrapped sausages but they don't have pre-wrapped bacon)
(Well, can you blame them? Yeah)

If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coat that's cruel)
And if I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you an exotic pet (yep, like a llama or an emu)
And if I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you John Merrick's remains (ooh, all them crazy elephant bones)
And if I had a million dollars I'd buy your love

If I had a million dollars (we wouldn't have to walk to the store)
If I had a million dollars (now we'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more)
If I had a million dollars (we wouldn't have to eat Kraft dinner)

(But we would eat Kraft dinner)
(Of course we would, we'd just eat more)
(And buy really expensive ketchups with it)
(That's right, all the fanciest Dijon ketchups, mmm)

If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress, that's cruel)
And if I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you some art (a Picasso or a Garfunkel)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a monkey (haven't you always wanted a monkey?)
If I had a million dollars, I'd buy your love

If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd be rich

Lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
Written by: Ed Robertson, Steven Page

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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Most interesting comment from YouTube:

Melvin Merkelhopper

This song takes me back to my childhood.


I wanted one of these for Christmas.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IDog


But I couldn't use it due to not having an mp3 player so my cousin bought his and played this song with it.


I only used it that one time and still have it my closet.



All comments from YouTube:

The Entire Earth

"Not a real green dress, that's cruel!"

relevantusername

🧙‍♂️

Bernardo O'Higgins VEVO

username checks out

Angela Sherman

The dye for Green Victorian clothing back in the day was derived from toxic copper arsonite (arsonic). So yes a real green dress would be VERY CRUEL.

Live Eritrean Learning Maths

That mean not grass or plantsjust green dress

PolarIce

Guys, it means if you wore a dress in that time people would take paint, and throw the paint at the dress so nobody would wear dresses. So it didn’t matter what color they said but green went with the song so that’s why they said that. “Not a green dress, that’s cruel!” Is basically saying I would buy you something nice just there’s no point because it’s going to get ruined.

22 More Replies...

Nybeth Obdilord

This song is brilliant. Those two breaks where the singers casually talk with each other make it even more relatable and shows they are just like us.

Joseph Cote

This was very much like their live shows. Each time they did a song it would be unique; the banter, or improvised lyrics or something.

1 More Replies...

DUMBY

My mom told me she absolutely hated this song. So here I am playing it for her to re-live those wholesome memories.

Steven Baldwell

But not really playing it, that’s cruel

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