Just Around The Corner
Bebe Neuwirth Lyrics

My daughter's getting married.
My daughter is getting married.

I can't believe it's true.
I cannot believe it is true.

She doesn't ask her parents before she says "I do".
She does not ask her parents' approval before she says "I do".

And what about my husband?
And what about my husband?

Oblivious, naive.
He is unaware and inexperienced.

This evening's getting serious: these Ohioans won't leave.
This evening is getting serious because these Ohioans won't leave.

But I can't let these latest problems rob me of my bliss.
But I cannot let these latest problems take away my happiness.

For when I'm scared of true disaster, I remember this:
When I am scared of a real disaster, I remember this:

Death is just around the corner waiting patiently to strike.
Death is always close by waiting patiently to strike.

One unplanned electrocution that's the kind of end I can comprehend.
One unexpected electrocution is an ending I can understand.

When I'm feeling uninspired Or I need a little spree I'm reborn knowing death is just around the corner coming after me.
When I am feeling uninspired or need to change things up, I remind myself that death is always near.

(spoken) Get it? Coroner. Death is just around the... corner.
Do you understand? Coroner. Death is just around the corner.

Death is just around the corner Waiting high upon the hill Someone buried in an avalanche (gasp) that's the kind of gig I can really dig.
Death is always present, looming high on the mountain. Being buried in an avalanche is an event that I can understand and relate to.

Marriage often disappoints you. Not each husband is a gem.
Marriage can often be disappointing as not every husband is perfect.

So I'll mourn knowing death is just around the corner coming after them.
So I will mourn knowing that death will come for them eventually.

If life's all plums I'll muddle through some.
If life is going well, I can handle a few obstacles.

But when death comes I hope it's gruesome. (hot-cha)
But when death comes, I hope it is dramatic and exciting.

Some people die from public stoning, faulty wiring, faulty zoning, cherry pits they didn't know were there. (choking noise)
Some people die in peculiar ways such as public stoning, electrical accidents, zoning issues or from choking on unexpected things like cherry pits.

It could be by a jungle cat
It could be by a wild animal like a jungle cat.

Female Ancestor: A slippery mat. Male Ancestor: A baseball bat.
A female ancestor suggests death by slipping on a mat while a male ancestor suggests death by a baseball bat.

Perhaps an unsuccessful love affair. (crying noise)
Perhaps death could come due to an unrequited love affair.

It could be on a speeding train, It could be underwater. It could be too much Novocain or even by your daughter.
Death could come in a multitude of ways including a train accident, underwater mishap, medical malpractice or even by the hands of your own daughter.

Female Ancestor: Perhaps a bad mosquito bite. Male Ancestor: A title fight. Female Ancestors: Religious rite. Morticia: My darlings, it might even be tonight.
A female ancestor suggests death due to a mosquito bite while a male ancestor suggests death due to a title fight. Other female ancestors suggest death as part of a religious rite. Morticia suggests death could arrive sooner than expected, even tonight.

Death is just around the corner no one's ever been immune.
Death is always near and has affected everyone.

Turning off a respirator with a simple click strenuously quick.
Turning off a patient's respirator with a simple click can lead to a quick death.

I can face a new tomorrow if I make it past today.
I can handle the future if I can survive today.

I feel good saying death is just around the corner simply on its way.
I feel better knowing that death is always near and approaching.

Death is just around the corner and you have to heed the call. (Don't ask why) For your death is just around the corner (You and I) Happy being both the mourned and mourner (Say goodbye) Because death is just around the corner coming for us all.
Death is unavoidable for all, so we must be prepared for when it arrives. We will both mourn and be mourned when the time comes. Death is always present and will eventually come for us all.