Belle and Sebastian released their first two albums in 1996: Tigermilk, recorded over three days, and If You're Feeling Sinister, recorded in a week, at the peak of the chamber pop movement. At first, some critics in Britain's music weeklies tied the band into the subgenre, yet the group was too pretty, too delicate, to bear that label. Through their first two years of public existence, the band shielded their personalities, submitting publicity photos featuring a girl, who was a friend of the band and reluctantly posing for photo shoots. Furthermore, they performed in odd venues, playing not only the standard coffeehouses and cafes, but also homes, church halls, and libraries.
Prior to the formation of Belle and Sebastian, Murdoch suffered from a protracted battle with chronic fatigue syndrome, which forced him to drop out of school and spend seven years living in his parents' home crippled by his condition.Whilst in his parents home, Murdoch wrote a short story about a boy named Sebastian and a girl named Isabelle based on the names from Madame Cecile Aubery's children's book Belle et Sebastian. On New Year's Day 1996, Stuart attended a party at which he met a young singer and cellist named Isobel Campbell. In a letter to his brother Fraser, Murdoch explained how he was making a single for Stow college at the end of February. Murdoch opted to use the name Belle&Sebastian for the project because it was occupying him at the time. Murdoch took to songwriting as an escapism from the four walls surrounding him in his room and eventually recorded demos with bassist Stuart David whom he met at a government training programme called Beatbox. Murdoch quickly met a series of other musicians through social and musical circles in his hometown Glasgow and they agreed to help with the Stow project. The members he found for this initial lineup were Stevie Jackson (guitar), Mick Cooke (trumpet), Chris Geddes (keyboards), Stuart David (bass), Richard Colburn (drums), and Isobel Campbell (cello). The Stow College record was to be issued by Electric Honey, but it turned into a full album. The course instructor Alan Rankine determined that Murdoch had enough good material to record a full LP and could do so if they could get it all done in three days, studio time allotted for the single. Murdoch and his musicians rose to the challenge and recorded ten tracks putting the songs in order as they would appear on the record and mostly completing them in just a few takes.
In May of 1996, Belle and Sebastian self-released their debut album, Tigermilk, on Electric Honey Records. Only 1,000 copies of the album, which was only pressed on vinyl, were released, but it unexpectedly became a sensation, earning terrific word of mouth throughout the UK. As a result, the band became slightly more than a school project — it became an actual band. If You're Feeling Sinister, released on the independent Jeepster label, followed in November of 1996. By the time the album was released in America on the EMI subsidiary The Enclave, it had earned considerable critical acclaim in the U.K. — not only from music weeklies, but from newspapers like The Sunday Times and magazines like The Face — and a large cult following; by some accounts, Tigermilk was being sold for as much as 75 pounds. Over the course of 1997, word of mouth continued to grow in America, even as the band pulled out of an American tour because The Enclave went bankrupt and closed.
As the band cult continued to build in 1997, Belle and Sebastian released three EPs — Dog on Wheels (May), Lazy Line Painter Jane (July), and 3.. 6.. 9 Seconds of Light (October). Each subsequent EP placed higher on the indie charts and received great critical acclaim. Later in the year, violinist Sarah Martin became a member of the band. By the end of the year, the group finalized an American deal with Matador Records, issuing The Boy With the Arab Strap in September 1998. The following year saw the eagerly anticipated wide re-release of Tigermilk, the album that started it all. It was the biggest selling album but is unpopular with the group themselves. Following completion of 2000's Fold Your Hands Child, You Walk Like a Peasant, Stuart David left Belle and Sebastian to focus full-time on his solo project, Looper, being replaced by Bobby Kildea of V-Twin. In 2001, the group released two EPs — Jonathan David and I'm Waking Up to Us — and recorded the soundtrack for Todd Solondz's film Storytelling. Just before the soundtrack's release in spring 2002, Belle and Sebastian embarked on a comprehensive tour of the United States and Canada before returning to Europe for the summer festival season. Midway through the tour, Isobel Campbell left the band, citing the usual differences.
Another major change that soon took place was the band leaving Jeepster and Matador to sign with Rough Trade, with their next record, late 2003's Dear Catastrophe Waitress, produced by the inimitable Trevor Horn (who also produced Frankie Goes to Hollywood, Yes, and scores of others). The record spawned the brilliant "Step into My Office, Baby" and "I'm a Cuckoo" singles, the latter of which was the group's biggest U.K. hit, reaching number 14 in early 2004. After a long worldwide tour that found Belle and Sebastian reaching new levels of success, they retired to Scotland and began preparing for the recording of their seventh full length album, The Life Pursuit, released in 2006.
In 2010, they released their eighth full length album, Write About Love.
Official website: www.belleandsebastian.com
The State I Am In
Belle and Sebastian Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
I was happy for a day in 1975
I was puzzled by a dream
It stayed with me all day in 1995
My brother had confessed he was gay
It took the heat off me for a while
He stood up with a sailor friend
Made it known upon my sister's wedding day.
Got married in a rush to save a kid from being deported
Now she's in love
I was so touched, I was moved to kick the crutches
From my crippled friend
She was not impressed
Cause I cured her on the Sabbath
I went to confess
When she saw the funny side, we introduced my child bride
To whiskey and gin
To whiskey and gin.
The priest in the booth had a photographic memory
For all he had heard
He took all of my sins and he wrote a pocket novel
Called The State That I'm In
So I gave myself to God
There was a pregnant pause before he said okay
Now I spend my days turning tables round in Marks & Spencer
They don't seem to mind.
I gave myself to sin, I gave
Myself to providence and I've
Been there and back again
The state that I am in.
I gave myself to sin, I gave
Myself to providence and I've
Been there and back again
The state that I am in.
Oh love of mine, would you condescend to help me?
Cause I am stupid and blind
Desperation is the Devil's work, it is the folly Of a boy's empty mind
Oh and now I'm feeling dangerous
Riding on city buses for a hobby is sad
Why don't you lead me to a living end
I promised that I'd entertain my crippled friend,
My crippled friend.
I gave myself to sin, I gave
Myself to providence and I've
Been there and back again
The state that I am in.
I gave myself to sin, I gave
Myself to providence and I've
Been there and back again
The state that I am in.
I gave myself to sin, I gave
Myself to providence and I've
Been there and back again
The state that I am in.
I gave myself to sin, I gave
Myself to providence and I've
Been there and back again
The state that I am in.
I gave myself to sin
And I've been there and back again
Oh yeah
The Belle and Sebastian song, "The State I Am In," is a reflective and honest account of the singer's life. The lyrics contain several vignettes, each detailing a different aspect of the singer's past. The song's overall message is that of being lost and searching for direction, grappling with one's morality, and the continual struggle to find oneself.
The first verse describes the singer's experience with unexpected moments that stay with him. The line, "I was happy for a day in 1975," is a wistful reflection of a moment that has long passed, but still carries meaning to the singer. The second line, "I was puzzled by a dream," highlights the importance of dreams and moments of reflection, as they can often hold significance in our lives.
In the second verse, the singer reveals that his brother came out as gay before he could, taking the pressure off of him for a while. He then witnessed his brother standing in support of his sailor friend at their sister's wedding, a moment that highlights the complexities of relationships and the sacrifices we make for those we love.
The song then moves to the singer's own experiences with love, marriage, and sin. He got married quickly to save someone from being deported, and in the following line, the singer highlights his own vulnerability and desire to help others, stating, "I was so touched, I was moved to kick the crutches from my crippled friend." However, his wife was not impressed with his actions, leading to further reflection and confession to a priest who writes about the "state" that the singer is in. The song concludes with the singer asking for guidance and support from his lover.
Overall, "The State I Am In" is a poignant and introspective song, reflecting on the complexities of life and our constant search for purpose and direction.
Line by Line Meaning
I was surprised
I did not expect what was happening
I was happy for a day in 1975
I experienced a moment of happiness in the past
I was puzzled by a dream
I was confused and uncertain about a dream I had
It stayed with me all day in 1995
The dream had a lasting impact on my emotions and thoughts
My brother had confessed he was gay
My brother revealed to me that he is attracted to the same gender
It took the heat off me for a while
This confession diverted attention away from me temporarily
He stood up with a sailor friend
My brother publicly supported his friend who is a sailor
Made it known upon my sister's wedding day.
He made this public announcement at a family event, his sister's wedding
Got married in a rush to save a kid from being deported
I hurriedly got married to prevent a child from being expelled from the country
Now she's in love
My partner is now in a romantic relationship
I was so touched, I was moved to kick the crutches
I was filled with emotion and energy, shown by kicking away my friend's crutches
From my crippled friend
My friend who has a physical disability needed crutches for walking
She was not impressed
My partner was not pleased with my action
Cause I cured her on the Sabbath
I helped her on the day of religious rest
I went to confess
I confessed my wrongdoings to the church
When she saw the funny side, we introduced my child bride
When my partner found humor in the situation, we showed off my young wife
To whiskey and gin
We shared drinks with our guests
The priest in the booth had a photographic memory
The priest who heard my confession had an excellent memory
For all he had heard
He remembered every detail of what I confessed
He took all of my sins and he wrote a pocket novel
The priest used my sins to write a mini-story
Called The State That I'm In
This story has the same title as this song
So I gave myself to God
I dedicated myself to following the teachings of God
There was a pregnant pause before he said okay
The priest hesitated before granting me permission
Now I spend my days turning tables round in Marks & Spencer
I work at Marks & Spencer, putting tables in their correct positions
They don't seem to mind.
My employer is satisfied with my work
I gave myself to sin
I indulged in immoral actions
I gave myself to providence and I've
I dedicated myself to divine guidance
Been there and back again
I have experienced highs and lows throughout my life
Oh love of mine, would you condescend to help me?
I am asking my partner for help
Cause I am stupid and blind
I admit that I lack understanding and insight
Desperation is the Devil's work, it is the folly Of a boy's empty mind
I acknowledge that feeling desperate and hopeless is a negative reflection of my naivety
Oh and now I'm feeling dangerous
I am experiencing feelings of recklessness
Riding on city buses for a hobby is sad
Bus-riding as a recreational activity is considered pathetic
Why don't you lead me to a living end
I am pleading with my partner to show me a fulfilling life
I promised that I'd entertain my crippled friend
I previously made a commitment to amuse my friend with a physical disability
My crippled friend.
This person has a physical disability and is important to me
Lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC
Written by: CHRISTOPHER GEDDES, ISOBEL CAMPBELL, MICHAEL COOKE, RICHARD COLBURN, STEPHEN JACKSON, STUART MURDOCH
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind