One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces
Ben Folds Five Lyrics

September '75 I was 47 inches high
During September of 1975, I was a mere 47 inches tall.

Mom said someday I would have
My mother once told me that one day I would be a powerful person.

A bad ass mother G.I. Joe
She even described me as a fearless, intimidating 'G.I. Joe'.

For your little minds to blow
People would be so amazed by my actions and presence that they would be left completely stunned.

I still got beat up after class
Despite these prophetic words, I was still bullied even after school.

Now I'm big and important
But now I have grown up and become powerful, just as my mother predicted.

One angry dwarf
I am angry and full of resentment because of how I was treated when I was younger.

And 200 solemn faces
And now, I am surrounded by people who appear serious and unamused by my presence.

Are you
Are you one of those people who's unamused by me? Or are you different?

If you want to see me
If you're curious about who I am and what I'm up to,

Check your papers and your T.V.
Then you should check out the news and media, where my name and story are likely known.

Look who's tellin' who what to do
It's amusing to me how I, the once bullied child, have now become the one in control and telling others what to do.

Kiss my ass good-bye
So if you're one of those people who once bullied me, you can say goodbye to me and my power as I move on to greater things.

Don't give me that bullshit
I won't tolerate any more of your lies and excuses.

You know who I am
You know exactly who I am and what I'm capable of.

I'm your nightmare little man
I am the tiny person who has the power to bring nightmares into your life.

Vic you stole my lunch money.
Vic, you are one of those bullies who had taken my lunch money in the past.

Made me cry.
You had caused me so much pain and suffering.

Jane remember second grade
Jane, do you remember what you said to me back in second grade?

Said you couldn't stand my face
You had insulted my very appearance and told me that you couldn't stand looking at me.

Rather than kiss me you said
You had even gone as far as to say that you would rather die than kiss me.

You'd rather die
Your hatred for me was so great, you would choose death over showing me any sort of affection.

You'll be sorry one day
But you and everyone else who has ever wronged me will one day regret it.

Yes you will, yes you will
You will see the error of your ways, whether you like it or not.

You shouldn't push me around
It's dangerous to push me around, because I have the potential to become a powerful force and strike back.

Cause I will, yes I will
And if pushed too far, I will do just that.

You will be sorry when I'm big
So don't laugh at me or dismiss me now, because one day I will be powerful and respected.

Yes you will be sorry
And that's when you'll regret every mistake you've ever made.