Uncle Walter
Ben Folds Five Lyrics


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Your Uncle Walter's going on and on
'Bout everything he's seen and done
The voice of 50 years experience
He's drunk, watching the television
You know he's been around the world
Last night he flew to Baghdad
In his magical armchair
Cigarettes and a six pack, he just got back
Now the spit's flying everywhere

Hey, hey, hey, hey (Your Uncle Walter's going on and on)
You're back so late (Where did you go that you were gone so long)
How could you leave me here so long with Uncle Walter

Your Uncle Walter saw who fired the shots
He drove his chair in the cavalcade
He's flown from South Africa
To countries where
They beat themselves on the backs with chains
There was a fleet of battleships
And 1 reclining chair
Headed north on the Arabian Sea
Now he's back to tell us what
He and his oldest boy Blair
They're getting rich with their mail order scheme

Oh, oh (Your Uncle Walter's going on and on)
We're so glad you're home (Where did you go that you were gone so long)
How could you leave me here so long with Uncle Walter

Your Uncle Walter told me
Everything he'd do if he was president
Oh what a perfect world
This world would be
If he was President now
But he's not

And he sees the children smoking pot
He knows that in a moment
They'll be shooting up heroin
Teardrops in his armchair
A 50 minute lecture
Tobacco juice rolling down his chin

Hey, hey, hey, hey (Your Uncle Walter's going on and on)




You're back so late (Where did you go that you were gone so long)
How could you leave me here so long with Uncle Walter

Overall Meaning

The song "Uncle Walter" by Ben Folds Five is a satirical portrayal of a drunk and boastful uncle who claims to have seen and done everything in the world. His stories include traveling to various countries, witnessing events like the shooting of the President and being involved in a mail order scheme that has made him and his son rich. However, the Uncle's stories are often contradictory and exaggerated, and he talks incessantly without listening to others. The song portrays the frustration of the singer who is left alone with Uncle Walter and has to hear his ramblings.


The lyrics of "Uncle Walter" provide a commentary on the tendency of people, particularly older individuals, to glorify their experiences and engage in one-upmanship. The song suggests that such behavior can be tiresome and frustrating for those who have to listen to it. It also highlights how people often exaggerate their stories and make up details to impress others.


Interestingly, the song has a barbershop quartet-style chorus that provides a contrast to the sarcastic tone of the verses. The upbeat music and playful choruses emphasize the humor in the lyrics and make the song more lighthearted.


Overall, "Uncle Walter" is a witty and clever song that uses humor to comment on human behavior. It highlights the tendency of people to exaggerate their accomplishments and engage in one-upmanship, while also acknowledging the frustration that such behavior can cause.


Line by Line Meaning

Your Uncle Walter's going on and on
Your Uncle Walter is being talkative and telling stories about himself


'Bout everything he's seen and done
He is narrating experiences from his life


The voice of 50 years experience
He is sharing his wisdom and knowledge acquired over fifty years


He's drunk, watching the television
He is under the influence of alcohol and watching TV


You know he's been around the world
He has traveled to different countries in the world


Last night he flew to Baghdad
He claims to have traveled to Baghdad recently


In his magical armchair
He is making up stories using his imagination


Cigarettes and a six pack, he just got back
He is smoking cigarettes and drinking beer while sharing his stories


Now the spit's flying everywhere
He is speaking so much that his saliva is splattering


Hey, hey, hey, hey (Your Uncle Walter's going on and on)
This is a repetitive line highlighting how talkative he is being


You're back so late (Where did you go that you were gone so long)
The singer is questioning why the listener was away for so long


How could you leave me here so long with Uncle Walter
The artist is complaining about being left alone with Uncle Walter's constant talking


Your Uncle Walter saw who fired the shots
He claims to have witnessed a shooting incident


He drove his chair in the cavalcade
He is saying he was a part of a motorcade


He's flown from South Africa
He claims to have traveled to South Africa


To countries where They beat themselves on the backs with chains
He is saying he has traveled to countries with severe punishments and traditions


There was a fleet of battleships
He is talking about a group of warships


And 1 reclining chair
He is exaggerating his part in the group by equating his armchair to a warship


Headed north on the Arabian Sea
He is saying the fleet went through the Arabian Sea towards the North


Now he's back to tell us what
He has returned to share more stories and experiences


He and his oldest boy Blair
He is talking about his son Blair


They're getting rich with their mail order scheme
He is claiming that he and his son are making a lot of money through a mail-order business


Oh, oh (Your Uncle Walter's going on and on)
This is another repetitive line highlighting how chatty Uncle Walter is being


We're so glad you're home (Where did you go that you were gone so long)
The artist is happy that the listener has returned home and is asking where they were for so long


Your Uncle Walter told me
He is saying that Uncle Walter shared something with him


Everything he'd do if he was president
Uncle Walter is suggesting what he would do if he were the president


Oh what a perfect world This world would be If he was President now But he's not
He is saying that Uncle Walter thinks he would have made the world perfect if he were the president but he isn't


And he sees the children smoking pot
He is making an observation that kids are smoking marijuana


He knows that in a moment They'll be shooting up heroin
He is saying that these kids will soon get addicted to a much stronger drug - heroin


Teardrops in his armchair
He is suggesting that Uncle Walter is crying or feeling emotional while talking about these issues


A 50 minute lecture
Uncle Walter is delivering a long speech, usually characterized by moralizing advice or admonition


Tobacco juice rolling down his chin
He is saying that Uncle Walter has a bad habit of spitting tobacco juice while talking


How could you leave me here so long with Uncle Walter
The artist is complaining again about being left alone with Uncle Walter




Lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC
Written by: BEN FOLDS

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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