Folk music
In 1965, together with Tam Harvey, Connolly started a group called the Humblebums. At their first gig, Connolly introduced them both to the audience by saying, "My name's Billy Connolly, and I'm humble. This is Tam Harvey, he's a bum." The band would later include Gerry Rafferty. Connolly sang, played banjo and guitar, and entertained the audience with his humorous introductions to the songs.
In his World Tour of Scotland, Connolly reveals that at a trailer show during the Edinburgh Festival, the Humblebums took to the stage just before the late Yehudi Menuhin.
The trio broke up in 1971, at which point Connolly went solo. His first solo album in 1972, Billy Connolly Live! on Transatlantic Records, features Connolly as a singer, songwriter, and musician.
His early albums were a mixture of comedy performances with comedic and serious musical interludes. Among his best known musical performances were "The Welly Boot Song", a comical ode to the working class which became his theme song for several years; "In the Brownies", a parody of the Village People classics "Y.M.C.A." and "In the Navy" (for which Connolly filmed a music video); "Two Little Boys in Blue", a tongue-in-cheek indictment of police brutality done to the tune of Rolf Harris' "Two Little Boys"; and the ballad "I Wish I Was in Glasgow" which Connolly would later perform on a guest appearance on the 1990s American sitcom Pearl (which starred Rhea Perlman). He also performed the occasional Humblebums-era song such as "Oh, No!" as well as straightforward covers such as a version of Dolly Parton's "Coat of Many Colors" which was included on his Riotous Assembly album.
In November 1975, his spoof of the Tammy Wynette song "D-I-V-O-R-C-E" had a one-week spell as the UK's No. 1 single. Wynette's original was about parents spelling out words of an impending marital split to avoid traumatizing their young child. Connolly's version "D.I.V.O.R.C.E.", on the other hand, played off of the fact that many dog owners use the same tactic when they do not wish their pet to become upset about an impending trip to the veterinarian. His song is about a couple whose marriage is ruined by a bad vet visit (spelling out "W.O.R.M." or "Q.U.A.R.A.N.T.I.N.E.", for example.)
His song "No Chance" was a parody of J.J. Barrie's "No Charge".
In 1985 he sang the theme song to Supergran, which was released as a single and in 1996 he performed a cover of Ralph McTell's In The Dreamtime as the theme to his World Tour of Australia. By the late 1980s, Connolly had all but dropped the music from his act, though he still records the occasional musical performance. In 1998 he covered The Beatles' "Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite" on the George Martin tribute, In My Life and he also recorded a rewritten version of Alanis Morissette's "Hand in My Pocket" entitled "The Evil Scotsman". Most recently, he sang a song during the film Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events.
Connolly is among the artists featured on Banjoman, a tribute to American folk musician Derroll Adams, released in 2002. He plays one song, "The Rock".
Stand-up comedy
It is as a stand-up comedian that Connolly is best known. His observational comedy is idiosyncratic and often off-the-cuff. He talks about himself, who he is, where he's been, what he thinks and how he reacts to the world around him. He has outraged audiences, critics and, of course, the media with his free use of the word "fuck". He has used masturbation, blasphemy, defecation, flatulence, sex, his father's illness and his aunts' cruelty to entertain. By exploring these subjects with humour, Connolly has done much to strip away the taboos surrounding them. Yet he does not tell jokes in the conventional way. At the end of a concert the audience can be convulsed with laughter but few can remember a specific "funny" line.
One of Connolly's most famous comedy skits is "The Crucifixion", an early 1970s recording in which he likens Christ's Last Supper to a drunken night out in Glasgow. The recording was banned by many radio stations at the time. Around this same time, a joke told during a television talk show appearance (about a murderer and his bike) became a sensation that, reportedly, people still remember three decades after the appearance. (A transcript of the complete joke can be found here).
Billy Connolly also performed a sketch broadcast on TV, when talking about national anthems, and comparing the UK's slow tune to the lively ones of many other nations, Billy suggested that it should be replaced by the theme tune to The Archers.
Connolly's style has changed over the years to be less controversial and more observational. Including topics such as himself aging, stories about where he has been and other aspects of his life. He also exclaims "Oh, I must tell you!" and vocalises whatever thought occurs to him. Another feature is his ability to break off onto a tangent mid-topic and return to it later -- sometimes as long as an hour later.
Awards
Connolly was awarded an honorary Doctor of Letters degree by the University of Glasgow on 11 July, 2001. This particularly bemused his wife, who noted that she had studied for six years to obtain her Ph.D., whereas Billy merely had to turn up and collect his. 2003 saw him presented with a BAFTA Lifetime Achievement award and a CBE in the Queen's Birthday Honours List.
On 4 July 2006, Connolly was awarded an honorary doctorate by Glasgow's Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama (RSAMD) for his service to performing arts [5].
Trivia
* While being interviewed with his wife on the Irish Late Late Show, Connolly proved how easily he forgets many great lines that other comedians could only hope to think of. The presenter was trying to get Connolly to reproduce a funny line he had read in "Bravemouth" about Connolly knowing of an organism that lives on a human eyelid that has two penises. He asked Connolly "What was it called?" to which Connolly replied "Some latin name that I can't remember". His wife then interrupted "But the translation means lucky bastard, right", to which Connolly broke down in a fit of laughter. When he complemented his wife on the line, she had to remind him that it was his own original line which he had forgotten.
* Connolly is a lifelong supporter of Glasgow football team, Celtic, and is often seen at their home games.
* Connolly came second in The Glasgow Herald's poll, "The Most Scottish Person In The World". Number one was Wee Jimmy Krankie (see The Krankies), while third place went to Russ Abbott's impersonation of a Scotsman.
D.I.V.O.R.C.E
Billy Connolly Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
But when you mention the V. E. T. He damn near flips his lid.
Words like S. H. O. T. Shot or W. O. Are. M. Worm,
These are words which make him S. Q. You. I. Are. M. Squirm.
His Q. You. A. Are. A. N. T. I. N. E starts today,
Because he bit the V. E. T. And then he ran away.
He caused me and my wife to have a big fight, and then, both of them bit me.
And that's why I am gonnae get a D. I. V. O. Are. C. E.
She shouted "get him Rover," and he jumped over, and bit my L. E. G.
She sank her teeth in my B. You. M. And called me an effin B.
Well I'm telling you, that was my cue, to get O. F. F.-ski
And I'm going down to the town tonight to get a new B. I. Are. D.
Oh yes his Q. You. A. Are. A. N. T. I. N. E starts today.
Both my wife and my wee scabby dug will soon be hauled away.
That's why I spell out all these words, so as my dog can't hear.
Oh I must admit that dog is acting Q. You. E. Are. Queer.
Oh, I must admit that dog is acting Q. You. E. Are. Queer.
The lyrics to Billy Connolly's song D.I.V.O.R.C.E. describe a hilarious situation where the idea of going to the vet with their pet dog causes so much anxiety and stress that it leads to a big fight between the couple. The dog, who is smart and aware of what's going on, almost loses his mind when he hears words like "shot" or "worm." The dog bites the vet and runs away, causing the couple to have a massive argument. The wife calls for the dog to attack the husband, and in the process, the man gets bitten by both wife and dog.
Amidst all this chaos, the man decides to file for a divorce. He can no longer handle the madness and strife that this pet-non-pet is causing in his life. The lyrics provide a comical commentary on how a small thing such as a visit to the vet can lead to severe consequences, and in this case, it's resulting in the end of a relationship. The dog's behavior and the couple's reactions to it highlight the absurdity of the situation and evoke laughter from the audience.
Overall, the song is a humorous take on a divorcing couple's situation, where the dog's antics become a massive contributing factor. It's a lighthearted way of looking at a situation that can be quite challenging in real life.
Line by Line Meaning
Our little dog is six years old, and he's smart as any damn kid.
Billy's dog is intelligent but gets agitated when hearing certain words related to the vet.
But when you mention the V. E. T. He damn near flips his lid.
Mentioning the word 'vet' makes the dog act overly excited and agitated.
Words like S. H. O. T. Shot or W. O. Are. M. Worm,
Words like 'shot' or 'worm' cause the dog to become uncomfortable and agitated.
These are words which make him S. Q. You. I. Are. M. Squirm.
The dog becomes restless and uncomfortable when certain words are mentioned due to his association with them.
His Q. You. A. Are. A. N. T. I. N. E starts today,
The dog is starting his quarantine period because he bit the vet and ran away.
Because he bit the V. E. T. And then he ran away.
The dog bit the vet and then escaped, leading to his quarantine period.
He caused me and my wife to have a big fight, and then, both of them bit me.
The incident involving the dog biting the vet caused an argument between Billy and his wife, which then led to them both biting him.
And that's why I am gonnae get a D. I. V. O. Are. C. E.
Due to the argument, Billy has decided to get a divorce from his wife.
She shouted "get him Rover," and he jumped over, and bit my L. E. G.
During the incident, Billy's wife called for their other dog Rover, who then proceeded to bite Billy on the leg.
She sank her teeth in my B. You. M. And called me an effin B.
During the argument, Billy's wife bit him on the butt and called him a derogatory name.
Well I'm telling you, that was my cue, to get O. F. F.-ski
After being bitten and insulted, Billy decided it was time to leave the situation.
And I'm going down to the town tonight to get a new B. I. Are. D.
Billy is going into the town to find a new bird, likely as a form of self-care after the ordeal.
Both my wife and my wee scabby dug will soon be hauled away.
Billy's wife and dog are both going to be removed from his life in some way.
That's why I spell out all these words, so as my dog can't hear.
Billy spells out certain words related to the vet so as to prevent his dog from becoming too agitated.
Oh I must admit that dog is acting Q. You. E. Are. Queer.
Billy acknowledges that his dog's behavior is strange, likely due to the stress and quarantine period he is experiencing.
Contributed by Isaac L. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
@geozeo710
Billy is the undisputed king of stand up.... Can hold a tune as well :)
@robmcguire7534
seems to be a trend with old style comedian's, Roy and Bernard are/were vocally blessed.
@jordanpuri4129
The Godfather of standup. Legend of a man.
@lediabolique5822
Ah, such great memories of my childhood. I wasn't always allowed to see Billy Connoly - because of the swearing - but this song was deemed 'acceptable' by my Mum!
@24934637
Pure genius. It'll be a sad say when he isn't around anymore.
@mikryan5846
What, you are upset that he will die eventually, you are the guy kneeling down to read the tiny writing on his grave stone
@FabulousIcedDonut
>Monty Python< 'I'm not dead yet'
@derekfinlay1739
Comedy genius legend
@ozbondwizard8487
Jesus Christ! Is that the time already?
@MrClassicInTheMaking
Everybody: You can't make spelling funny.
Billy: Hold my beer.