Tell Laura I Love Her
Billy Connolly Lyrics


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Billy Connolly: Tell Laura I Love Her
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(from the LP "The Pick of Billy Connolly")


TELL LAURA I LOVE HER!
TELL LAURA I NEED HER!
TELL LAURA NOT TO CRY
MY LOVE FOR HER WILL NEVER DIE.

Ladies and gentlemen, I want to tell you,

Oh yes, Laura and I were lovers for a long time ladies and gentlemen
'Til God took her away for a special purpose of his very own.
I must admit I was a bit cheesed off at the time.
I had a special purpose in mind myself.
But there you go.

Oh, sure, we'd lovers tiffs like anybody else.
Like the time, in a moment of weakness, I sunk
and I bought a dirty magazine.
And in that magazine, ladies and gentlemen,
I read about erogenous zones.
In a very sly way, ladies and gentlemen,
I invited Laura over to my place, ostensibly for coffee and cookies.
And we were sitting on the sofa,
and we were necking, ladies and gentlemen, necking.
And I guess I must have touched one of her erogenous zones,
ladies and gentlemen,
Because she kneed me in one of mine.

TELL LAURA I LOVE HER!
TELL LAURA I NEED HER!
TELL LAURA NOT TO CRY
MY LOVE FOR HER
WILL NEVER DIE.

Oh ladies and gentlemen, I can't tell you,

How could I ever forget
that day God took Laura away for a special purpose of his own.
We were downtown shopping for Laura's mum.
She wanted some rubber bedclothes and an inflatable man.
Strange woman Laura's mum.
But anyhow, we were walking hand in hand down Main Street
When a child ran onto the road, ladies and gentlemen.
I said "Oh my God, my nerves!" and I covered my eyes
I guess I'm that kind of guy.
But Laura, who was made of stronger stuff than I,
dashed onto the road to save that child.

Ladies and gentlemen, I wanna tell you,
the child made it to the other side
and turned round and said "Eee eu eee-e eh-eu"
but Laura didn't.
She made it to the white line in the centre of the road,
ladies and gentlemen,
when a juggernaut came around the corner sideways and flattened her.

TELL LAURA I LOVE HER!
TELL LAURA I NEED HER!
(I blame myself, I blame myself)
TELL LAURA NOT TO CRY
MY LOVE FOR HER
WILL NEVER DIE.

Oh ladies and gentlemen, how can I tell you,

Some nights I lie awake, awash with sweat,
as I hear the exact noise those lorries made when they flattened Laura
It was a sorta "SPLAT"
You know the noise you get
When you stick a straw up a frogs bum and blow really hard
I blame myself

I wanna tell you, ladies and gentlemen
Main Street was not a pretty sight
There was bits of Laura everywhere
I remember, two bits were sliding down the post office window
And a big Alsatian came around the corner
and made off with another couple of bits
And it was with a heavy heart
And a tear in either eye
I searched, and I searched
but I couldn't find the bit I was looking for!

TELL LAURA I LOVE HER!
TELL LAURA I NEED HER!
TELL LAURA NOT TO CRY




MY LOVE FOR HER
WILL NEVER DIE

Overall Meaning

Billy Connolly's song "Tell Laura I Love Her" is a humorous, yet tragic tale of a man, presumably Connolly himself, reminiscing about his lost love, Laura. The song begins with a plea for the listener to deliver a message to Laura, that despite her passing, the singer's love for her will never fade. The lyrics then delve into vivid details of their past relationship, including a comical incident in which the singer attempted to experiment with erogenous zones, resulting in a humorous physical altercation between the two.


However, the tone of the song quickly shifts as the singer describes the tragic circumstances of Laura's death. While walking down Main Street, the couple encounters a child who runs into the road. While the singer cowers in fear, Laura selflessly rushes to save the child and is ultimately killed by a passing truck. The song concludes with additional pleading for the listener to deliver the message of love to Laura, who is no longer physically present.


The song is a unique mix of comedy and tragedy, showcasing Connolly's skill as a storyteller. It pokes fun at the absurdities of life while also exploring the crushing pain of loss. It is a reminder that both laughter and tears can exist simultaneously in the same moment.


Line by Line Meaning

TELL LAURA I LOVE HER!
I had a close relationship with Laura, who has since passed away. Please convey to her that I loved her deeply.


TELL LAURA I NEED HER!
Laura was an important part of my life, and I still need her in some way. Please tell her that.


TELL LAURA NOT TO CRY
Laura may be upset or sad about something. Please tell her not to cry, as my love for her will always persist.


MY LOVE FOR HER WILL NEVER DIE.
Although Laura has passed away, my love for her will never diminish or disappear.




Contributed by Austin E. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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Comments from YouTube:

@surferjoehabibi6312

Best version of Tell Laura I Love Her I Have Ever Heard! Brilliant.

@whocares2001

Just love this. wish we had the entire concert to watch! would cheer me up no end.

@braveheartbri

Brilliant. Seen it so many times over the years but still funny

@moirasmith8621

Billy at his very best, hysterical!!

@whocares2001

still laughing after 6 different days of watching. he's great! he really cheers me up and laugh, laugh, laugh.

@evelynanderson9969

Good one for you on Karaoke??

@ooohcheese

@metalhen Yeh! At least he kept his feelings under control, I hardly noticed he was upset. Keep cool $pider. Cheesy.

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