Fine Romance
Bing Crosby Lyrics


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A fine romance with no kisses

A fine romance, my friend, this is

We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes

(To-mah-toes, dear)
But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed po-tah-toes

(Potatoes)

A fine romance you won't nestle

A fine romance you won't even wrestle

You've never mussed the crease in my blue serge pants

You never take a chance, this is a fine romance

A fine romance, my good fellow

You take romance, I'll take Jello

You're calmer than the seals in the Arctic Ocean

At least they flap their fins to express emotion

A fine romance, my dear Duchess

Two old fogies, we really need crutches

You're just as hard to land as the Ile de France

(France)

I haven't got a chance

(Chance)

This is a fine romance

A fine romance, my good woman

My strong, aged in the wood woman

You never give those orchids I send a glance

They're just like cactus plants

(Oh boy)





This is a fine romance

Overall Meaning

The lyrics to Bing Crosby's "Fine Romance" are a humorous take on a failed romantic relationship. The singer describes a relationship that lacks physical affection and passion - "a fine romance with no kisses." Despite their lack of intimacy, the singer appears to still have a fondness for their partner, referring to them as "my good fellow" and "my dear Duchess." However, they also express frustration with their partner's lack of spontaneity and willingness to take risks in the relationship - "you never take a chance, this is a fine romance." The final line of each verse, "this is a fine romance," highlights the irony of the situation - while the singer continues to refer to their relationship as "fine," it is clear that they are dissatisfied and unfulfilled.


The song's humor is further emphasized through its use of wordplay and puns, with lines like "you're as cold as yesterday's mashed po-tah-toes" and "you take romance, I'll take Jello." The final verse brings the song to a comical conclusion with the singer referring to their partner as a "strong, aged-in-the-wood woman" and comparing their lack of interest to that of a cactus plant.


Line by Line Meaning

A fine romance with no kisses
Our supposed romance is missing the affectionate intimacy it deserves


A fine romance, my friend, this is
Despite our lack of physical connection, we still claim to have a good relationship


We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes (to-mah-toes, dear)
We ought to be passionate lovers, but instead we’re emotionally distant


But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed po-tah-toes (potatoes)
You're emotionally unresponsive and distant, like leftovers that have lost their appeal


A fine romance, you won't nestle
You’re not interested in getting close or cuddling


A fine romance, you won't even wrestle
You’re not even interested in any playful physical contact


You've never mussed the crease in my blue serge pants
You haven't shown any interest or passion towards me, even to the point of moving me or touching me


You never take a chance, this is a fine romance
You're never willing to take a risk or put any effort into making our relationship better


A fine romance, my good fellow
Our relationship may be without passion or intimacy, but we still treat each other warmly


You take romance, I'll take Jello
You’re not passionate about romance, which is as unappetizing to you as Jello would be to me


You're calmer than the seals in the Arctic Ocean
You're so aloof and unemotional that even the famously silent seals seem more expressive


At least they flap their fins to express emotion
Unlike you, even the seals find ways to communicate their feelings


A fine romance, my dear Duchess
Our love is so cold and passionless, we may as well be dignified old nobles instead of lovers


Two old fogies, we really need crutches
Our relationship is so stiff and lacking in energy that we’d need support to even stand up


You're just as hard to land as the Ile de France! (Fronce)
You're as difficult and unattainable as a massive ocean liner


I haven't got a chonce (chance), this is a fine romance
Our relationship may be passionless and difficult, but I seem resigned to it


A fine romance, my good woman
I still refer to you fondly, even as our romantic connection fades


My strong, aged-in-the-wood woman
I still find you admirable, even if our love life is nonexistent and our romantic connection has faded over time


You never give those orchids I send a glance
You don’t respond to my romantic gestures or tokens of affection in any way


They're just like cactus plants, (oh boy)
My romantic gifts are as unappreciated and unpromising as cactus plants would be for you


This is a fine romance!
Our relationship may lack romance or passion, but I continue to put a positive spin on it




Lyrics © Kanjian Music, BMG Rights Management, Universal Music Publishing Group, RESERVOIR MEDIA MANAGEMENT INC
Written by: Jerome Kern, Dorothy Fields

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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Comments from YouTube:

moonraven3

I absolutely adore the duet version of this timeless classic. I wish I could find the Doris Day & Buddy Clark rendition. It's even better than this one!

Natalie Harshman

Although I love Bing I still say Fred and Ginger's version is the best...this one's kinda slow. But it's still pretty cute and funny.
~:~

Spitalhatch

I agree - his partner appears to be his first wife, Dixie Lee Crosby.

Katherine Hamar

Who is the lady singing with him?

Radu Balaban

Dixie Lee

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