An Apple for the Teacher
Bing Crosby & Connee Boswell Lyrics

You're sophisticated
You are experienced and knowledgeable

I think I'm naive
I believe myself to be innocent and inexperienced

Well, let's play the game that way
Let's continue with this dynamic, as if I am naive and you are sophisticated

Yes, that's what I believe
I am committed to this game of teacher and student

An apple for the teacher
A gift for you, as a symbol of my respect and admiration

That seems the thing to do
It is a traditional and appropriate gesture

Because I wanta learn
I seek knowledge and education from you

About romance from you
Specifically, I wish to learn about love and romance

Just to show that I'm meek and mild
This gift is also intended to demonstrate my humility and obedience

If you insist on saying
If you continue to perceive me as a difficult or unruly student

That I'm just a problem child
Someone who causes trouble or disrupts the class

You're gonna get all my attention
I will give you my full focus and effort

And your wish will be my rule
I will comply with your directives and desires

And maybe you'll be good to me
I hope for kindness and favor from you

Just keep me after school
Perhaps you can offer extra instruction or guidance

That's how I'd better start
This apple is my opening move, my attempt to win your favor

Then after awhile you may give in
Over time, you may become more sympathetic to my cause

And let me bring my heart
I hope to win your love and affection

S'always gonna do the trick
This gift is sure to win you over

Not if you didn't study
However, it is not a substitute for hard work and preparation

Your arithmetic
In this case, your math skills

Gonna make a great success
This apple will lead to my triumph

Well it won't, if you didn't memorise
However, this gesture is meaningless if I have not done the work required to succeed

The Gettysburg address
In this case, a famous speech by Abraham Lincoln

I got a little bit of glamour
I possess some charm and style

And a charm that's cute and quaint
My personality is somewhat endearing and old-fashioned

I may excuse your grammar
I might overlook your mistakes in speech or writing

And believe you're what you ain't
I may be easily fooled by appearances or misrepresentations

I got an apple, big red apple for the teacher
Once again, I offer you a gift as a token of my respect

That's how I'm fixin' to start
This apple is the beginning of my campaign to win your favor

Then after awhile she may give in
My hope is that over time, you will become more receptive to my advances

And let you bring your heart
I hope to earn your love through my persistence and dedication