What If
Bongwater Lyrics


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What if I bake you a coconut cake?
With lots of nuts, the kind that you hate?
What if I threw your car keys in the lake?

What if I made you cry?
What if I told you lies?

What if I took you to the edge?
What if I pushed you off a ledge?
What if I scratched all your Sister Sledge?

What if I made you cry?
What if I tell you lies?
Would you still love me?

What if I made you get me a tab?
And made you pay for all of the cabs?
What if I gave you all of my crabs?

What if I laughed when you cried?
Then said it was all just a lie?

Would you still love me?

What if I had PMS all my life?
And told you "You look just like Barney Fife"?
What if I twisted it in like a knife?

Until it made you cry?
Until it made you lie?





Would you still love me?
Would you still love me?

Overall Meaning

The lyrics to Bongwater's song "What If" are a series of hypothetical questions being posed to an unknown subject. The questions start off mildly with an offer to bake a coconut cake, but quickly escalate into more extreme scenarios such as throwing car keys in the lake or pushing someone off a ledge. The lyrics then take a lighter turn with a pun about scratching Sister Sledge followed by more extreme hypotheticals such as making someone pay for all the cabs or giving them crabs. The chorus poses the question of whether this unknown subject would still love the singer if they made them cry, told them lies, or twisted the knife until they cried or lied.


The lyrics to "What If" are a commentary on the extreme lengths people will go to in order to test the limits of the people they care about. The singer is asking if their loved one would still love them if they behaved in an extreme and hurtful way. The tone of the song is playful but the underlying question is serious: how much can one person take from another before the relationship reaches its breaking point?


Line by Line Meaning

What if I bake you a coconut cake?
What if I try to do something nice for you?


With lots of nuts, the kind that you hate?
Or what if I actually make it worse for you by including things you don't like?


What if I threw your car keys in the lake?
What if I do something really mean to you like throwing away your belongings?


What if I made you cry?
What if I hurt you emotionally?


What if I told you lies?
What if I deceive you and break your trust?


What if I took you to the edge?
What if I bring you to the brink of danger or anxiety?


What if I pushed you off a ledge?
What if I take it even further by actually causing physical harm to you?


What if I scratched all your Sister Sledge?
What if I destroy something that means a lot to you, like your prized possessions?


What if I made you get me a tab?
What if I make you do something for me and make you pay for it?


And made you pay for all of the cabs?
Or what if I take advantage of you financially?


What if I gave you all of my crabs?
What if I give you something terrible that you didn't ask for?


What if I laughed when you cried?
What if I don't show any empathy towards you and make fun of you when you're vulnerable?


Then said it was all just a lie?
And worst of all, what if I betray your trust and reveal that I never cared in the first place?


Would you still love me?
Despite all of this, would you still have affection for me?


What if I had PMS all my life?
What if I have a condition that causes me to be moody and agitated all the time?


And told you "You look just like Barney Fife"?
What if I insulted you and compared your appearance to an unattractive character?


What if I twisted it in like a knife?
What if I intentionally make my insults hurt even more?


Until it made you cry?
What if I keep going until I make you break down?


Until it made you lie?
Or what if I manipulate you into saying or doing something you don't want to do?


Would you still love me?
Finally, would you still love me despite all of these horrible things that I could potentially do to you?




Contributed by Hunter Y. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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Most interesting comment from YouTube:

@brjunior22

Lyrics -
What if I bake you a coconut cake?
With lots of nuts, the kind that you hate?
What if I threw your car keys in the lake?

What if I made you cry?
What if I told you lies?

What if I took you to the edge?
What if I pushed you off a ledge?
What if I scratched all your Sister Sledge?

What if I made you cry?
What if I tell you lies?
Would you still love me?

What if I made you get me a Tab?
And made you pay for all of the cabs?
What if I gave you all of my crabs?

What if I laughed when you cried?
Then said it was all just a lie?

Would you still love me?

What if I had PMS all my life?
And told you "You look just like Barney Fife"?
What if I twisted it in like a knife?

Until it made you cry?
Until it made you lie?

Would you still love me?
Would you still love me?

(...we don’t need to have a band here tonight. You afraid you won’t be heard? Everybody can hear your fuckin’ clams out there. You don’t need a mike for that. You’re takin’ up too much fuckin’ time blowin’ what? Shit!!)



All comments from YouTube:

@theboyisnotright6312

In 1993 I had just gotten out of the Air Force. Bong water, LSD, and entirely to much alcohol brought me to where I could go 9n with life. Great jams! Please heal everyone, especially my fellow vets!😃

@77justluigi

I haven't heard this in many moons

@Anwahs13

Love bongwater

@daveroth9168

....thanks for takin th time to upload it so i don't hafta go lookin for it...aren't you glad you finally stopped takin her calls?...sure glad i did...

@brjunior22

Lyrics -
What if I bake you a coconut cake?
With lots of nuts, the kind that you hate?
What if I threw your car keys in the lake?

What if I made you cry?
What if I told you lies?

What if I took you to the edge?
What if I pushed you off a ledge?
What if I scratched all your Sister Sledge?

What if I made you cry?
What if I tell you lies?
Would you still love me?

What if I made you get me a Tab?
And made you pay for all of the cabs?
What if I gave you all of my crabs?

What if I laughed when you cried?
Then said it was all just a lie?

Would you still love me?

What if I had PMS all my life?
And told you "You look just like Barney Fife"?
What if I twisted it in like a knife?

Until it made you cry?
Until it made you lie?

Would you still love me?
Would you still love me?

(...we don’t need to have a band here tonight. You afraid you won’t be heard? Everybody can hear your fuckin’ clams out there. You don’t need a mike for that. You’re takin’ up too much fuckin’ time blowin’ what? Shit!!)

@badfellas69

this is rad

@yourebloodyjokin

Heavy..

@TheLastSliceOfPie

y'all mind if i snort some bongwater real quick

@batterycock

what if i scratched all your Sister Sledge?

@shawnforeman5340

what if I laughed when you cry?

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