Can't.Lie.Around.Remembering.Everything.
Capstan Lyrics

This hit me from left field these feelings that you had concealed.
I was blindsided by the emotions that you had hidden away for so long.

A sense of emptiness that you revealed leaving silence over the phone line.
You expressed a feeling of emptiness that left a void between us during our phone conversation.

There were some things I just couldn't say
There were certain words that I found difficult to express.

I thought about you every fucking day
You were constantly on my mind, day in and day out.

Watching miles slowly cause decay while the weeks and months tear you away.
As the distance between us grew over time, it felt like our relationship was slowly deteriorating.

Well I guess it's just a missed sense of confidence
I lacked the confidence to say what I wanted to say or to pursue what I wanted to pursue.

Don't worry because I'll be fine.
I'm telling you not to worry about me, even though I'm struggling internally.

You've got your city lights and I've got the shoreline.
We have different paths and different environments that we find comfort in.

You will always be branded in me
You will always be a part of me, even if we are no longer together.

A memory I'll try to keep out of my head
I'll try to forget the memories we shared in order to move on.

A reoccurring dream I can't forget so I'll just sleep in instead
The memories of you keep haunting me in my dreams, so I prefer to sleep to avoid facing them.

I'm leaving open seats to the New York City streets.
I'm leaving room for new experiences and new people in my life, even if it means facing the busyness of the city.

I always figured they be just a little too crowded for me.
I always thought the crowds of New York City would be overwhelming for me, but now I'm willing to face them.

But I swear there was weight in the words you said.
The words you spoke carried a heavy significance for me.

Enough to knock me off my feet and straight into your bed.
Your words had such an impact on me that I was drawn to you physically as well.

These bad dreams relapse two separate marks on the same map.
My nightmares are a constant reminder of our past connection, which is like two intersecting lines on a map.

I keep chasing these times I know I can't get back.
I keep longing for the past, even though I know I can never truly relive those experiences.

It's just another classic case of the right person at the wrong time.
Our relationship was doomed from the start because we were the right people for each other, but it was not the right time for us.

You left me with a wreck inside my head, bloody knuckles and a note that read
You left me emotionally devastated, which led to my physical pain and a note that ended our relationship.

"You should have loved someone else instead"
Your note suggested that I would have been better off loving someone else instead of you.

I should've loved someone else instead
I now realize that you were not the right person for me and I should have loved someone else instead.

And I know this could never work so I'll play it out in my head instead
I understand that our relationship could never work, but I still imagine different scenarios in my mind.

From the moment that we met to those three words that you never said.
I think about all the moments we shared, especially the moments when you didn't express your feelings for me.

You are the life support that time cut short.
You were the one who gave me life and hope, even though our relationship was short-lived.

The skip in my heartbeat. I'm dragging my feet.
You made my heart skip a beat and now I feel like I'm struggling to move forward.

You are the lock on my gate keeping me from moving on.
I feel like I'm trapped in the past and unable to move on from our relationship.

You left me with a wreck inside my head.
You emotionally devastated me and left me feeling like a wreck.