Simon's career began with a short-lived music group with her sister Lucy as The Simon Sisters. They had a minor hit in 1964 called "Winkin', Blinkin', and Nod", and made three albums together before Lucy left to get married and start a family. Later, Carly Simon collaborated with eclectic New York rockers Elephant's Memory for about six months. She also appeared in the 1971 Milos Forman movie Taking Off, playing an auditioning singer, and sang "Long Term Physical Effects", which was included in Taking Off, the 1971 soundtrack for the movie.
Simon's major breakthrough was 1972's No Secrets. The album spawned several successful singles, including Simon's biggest hit, "You're So Vain". Simon continued to produce successful albums through the 1970s and early 1980s, moving into film scores after she was dropped by her record label in 1985. She performed the main title song for the James Bond film The Spy Who Loved Me - "Nobody Does It Better" which was a worldwide hit in 1977.
That's The Way I've Always Heard It Should Be
Carly Simon Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
His cigarette glows in the dark
The living room is still
I walk by, no remark
I tiptoe past the master bedroom where
My mother reads her magazines
I hear her call sweet dreams
But I forget how to dream
But you say it's time we moved in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me
Well, that's the way I've always heard it should be
You want to marry me
My friends from college, they're all married now
They have their houses and their lawns
They have their silent noons
Tearful nights, angry dawns
Their children hate them for the things they're not (things they'll never be)
They hate themselves for what they are
And yet they drink, they laugh
Close the wound, hide the scar
But you say it's time we moved in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me
Well, that's the way I've always heard it should be
You want to marry me
You say we can keep our love alive
Babe, all I know is what I see
The couples cling and claw
And drown in love's debris
You say we'll soar like two birds through the clouds
But soon you'll cage me on your shelf
I'll never learn to be just me first
By myself
Well okay, it's time we moved in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me
Well, that's the way I've always heard it should be
You want to marry me
We'll marry
The lyrics of Carly Simon's song That's The Way I've Always Heard It Should Be are a reflection on the societal expectations of marriage and family. The first verse sets the tone with a description of a family home where the parents are going through the motions but not communicating with each other or their children. It is a stark portrayal of a lack of intimacy and emotional connection. This is contrasted with the second verse where the singer's peers are married and have families, but they are not happy. There is a feeling of disappointment and disillusionment with the idea of the traditional family structure. The chorus provides a solution to this societal pressure by presenting marriage as the only way forward. The lyrics ultimately suggest that individuals have no choice but to conform to societal expectations of a monogamous relationship and that this is the only path to happiness.
The bridge of the song represents the tension between the individual’s desire for independence and the pressure to conform to a societal norm. The singer is hesitant about getting married, recognizing the way that marriage has hindered others' lives. The lyrics indicate that the singer is afraid that marriage will limit their individuality and that they will ultimately serve as a source of disappointment to their partner. However, the chorus reflects the persistent societal pressure to conform and settle down.
Line by Line Meaning
My father sits at night with no lights on
My father sits alone in darkness at night
His cigarette glows in the dark
Only the ember of his cigarette provides light
The living room is still
The house is quiet and still
I walk by, no remark
I pass by without saying anything
I tiptoe past the master bedroom where
I sneak past the room where my parents sleep
My mother reads her magazines
My mother is reading magazines
I hear her call sweet dreams
I hear her say goodnight
But I forget how to dream
I have lost the ability to dream
But you say it's time we moved in together
You suggest we should live together
And raised a family of our own, you and me
We should start a family
Well, that's the way I've always heard it should be
Starting a family is how society expects life to go
You want to marry me
You want to marry me
My friends from college, they're all married now
My college friends are now all married
They have their houses and their lawns
They have homes with yards
They have their silent noons
They have quiet afternoons
Tearful nights, angry dawns
They have nights with tears and mornings with fights
Their children hate them for the things they're not (things they'll never be)
Their kids don't like them for not living up to their expectations
They hate themselves for what they are
They are unhappy with themselves
And yet they drink, they laugh
They try to enjoy life with alcohol and laughter
Close the wound, hide the scar
They try to forget their hurts and hide their pain
You say we can keep our love alive
You believe we can make our love last
Babe, all I know is what I see
I can only judge by what I observe
The couples cling and claw
Other couples fight and struggle to stay together
And drown in love's debris
They are destroyed by the aftermath of love
You say we'll soar like two birds through the clouds
You think our love will be beautiful and free like birds in the sky
But soon you'll cage me on your shelf
You will eventually try to control and restrict me
I'll never learn to be just me first
I will never be able to prioritize myself
By myself
Alone
Well okay, it's time we moved in together
Alright, we will move in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me
We will start a family together
Well, that's the way I've always heard it should be
Society expects us to start a family
You want to marry me
You want to marry me
Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group
Written by: Jacob Brackman, Carly Simon
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
Douglas Hager
It’s 2021. Am I allowed to say the following?....That hair. Those amazing legs. Fabulous dress. Ethereal voice. Phenomenal song. Kudos to the production as well. I totally understand and try to adhere to the concept of living in the present, but can I just go back in time and be 14 again in 1971? Please?
Pat Flathman
ah, i was 11 and indeed in love with her!
Douglas Hager
@Pat Flathman Yes indeed!
Martyn Brewer
@Douglas Hager Political correctness is often misused. If it's meant as a compliment and an appreciation of beauty then why not.
Tony
I don't blame you! She's a nice, attractive, likeable woman as well as a great singer/songwriter/performer
Mark Z
Since she rarely performed in public, this clip is priceless.
Pisces Music
I love everything about this video. Carly Simon’s voice, the lyrics, her performance, her red outfit, her hair glowing in the light, the haunting presents of sadness, and even seeing Art Garfunkel chatting with George Harrison back stage. I love it all!! ❤
Wyndi Turner
You nailed it 😊
KittyGrizGriz
Very well said! Carly moves like a gazelle, so classy and elegant looking, she’s absolutely amazing 🤩
Theresa Blair
❤Same