Letissier has used numerous personal and stage names, and remarked that he "just ha many names for all the layers". He began his career as Christine and the Queens. For his second studio album, he shortened it to Chris, which was accompanied by a shift to a persona described as "a woman playing with masculine tropes". In October 2021, he was using the name Rahim. This sparked a debate around cultural appropriation due to the name's Arabic origin. He eventually began using a succession of different names such as Sam le pompier (the French title of Fireman Sam) and a full stop before settling on Redcar, sometimes shortened as Red. In August 2022, he updated his pronouns to he/him across social media platforms. In 2023, with the release of fourth album Paranoïa, Angels, True Love, he seemed to have reverted to simply Chris. However, he still occasionally uses his birth name, about which he said: "Héloïse Letissier is my parents' provenance and I love my parents. I sometimes use Héloïse to reconnect me to my childhood, but my inner child name is Manamané."
Doesn't matter
Christine and the Queens Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Leaning towards this abyss
And of lately the only people I can stare
Are the unraveled ones with their hands laying bare
But their hands are numb and empty
Their dull silence soothes me
Loud whispers in my back as if I couldn't hear
Thought I left ghosts behind but they're just coming near
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
Rage as a fabric, through and through
Like that gaze they used to do
'Cause the suicidal thoughts that are still in my head
Gives her that awful side-smile when I lay in bed
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
She's barely feeding, but she'll deny
Ribbon-legged, she passes by
Until she surrenders in the midst of the street
And the guys simply stare but continue to eat
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
And if I am cast out 'cause I wanted some more
And if this guy dances way too close to the shore
And if I could just push this door chalked on the wall
And if after the void there's somewhere else to fall
Forget I said it
I soliloquize
A stinging nettle
Their hands on their thighs
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Don't ever tell them, I've got your back, yeah, yeah
Choking to tears with shards of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight (oh, run)
Don't ever tell them, I've got your back (save all you can)
Choking to tears with shards of sunlight (oh, you won't be found)
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight (oh, and never come back)
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
God, god, god, god
God, god, god, god
God, god, god, god
God, god, god
The song "Doesn't Matter" by Christine and the Queens is a melancholic reflection on the emptiness and disillusionment that comes with self-doubt and depression. In the first verse, the singer describes feeling drawn towards the abyss, as she watches people struggling with their own pain. She finds solace in their silence and feels haunted by the ghosts of her own past. The chorus repeats the lines "It doesn't matter, does it/If I know any exit/If I believe in god and if god does exist." This refrain suggests that the singer feels trapped in her own despair and doubts the possibility of finding a way out or of finding any meaning or purpose in life.
The second verse seems to focus on the singer's self-loathing, describing her own "suicidal thoughts" and the "awful side-smile" of the voice in her head. The next lines shift the focus to a different person, a woman who is "barely feeding" and denying her own pain, but is eventually consumed by it in the street. The third repetition of the chorus reinforces the idea that these struggles and losses are ultimately meaningless and insignificant.
The outro of the song seems to echo the first verse, with the lines "Run if you stole a shard of sunlight/Don't ever tell them, I've got your back/Choking to tears with shards of sunlight/Run if you stole a shard of sunlight." These lines suggest that hope and joy are fleeting and fragile, and that the singer has learned to accept the inevitability of loss and disappointment.
Overall, the song could be interpreted as a meditation on the struggles of depression and mental illness, and the difficulty of finding hope or meaning in a world that can seem empty or indifferent. The repeating refrain of "it doesn't matter" suggests a resigned sense of futility, but the haunting beauty of the music and lyrics also suggests that there is still something profound and valuable in these struggles.
Line by Line Meaning
I'm lingering on when they kiss
I can't help but watch people kiss
Leaning towards this abyss
I'm drawn towards feeling empty and darkness
And of lately the only people I can stare
Lately, the only people I can look at are those who are broken
Are the unraveled ones with their hands laying bare
I feel drawn to those with nothing left and exposed hands
But their hands are numb and empty
They have nothing left to feel or give
Their dull silence soothes me
The lack of sound from them is comforting to me
Loud whispers in my back as if I couldn't hear
I feel ostracized by others and their whispers behind my back, as if I can't hear them
Thought I left ghosts behind but they're just coming near
Even though I thought I left my ghosts behind, they're still haunting me and coming back
It doesn't matter, does it
Nothing really matters or makes a difference
If I know any exit
Whether or not I know of any escape route
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I have faith in God and whether God exists
Rage as a fabric, through and through
Anger is a part of me throughout
Like that gaze they used to do
Similar to the way people used to look at me
'Cause the suicidal thoughts that are still in my head
I'm still struggling with suicidal thoughts in my head
Gives her that awful side-smile when I lay in bed
The suicidal thoughts give me a terrible grin when I'm lying in bed
She's barely feeding, but she'll deny
She isn't eating enough, but she won't admit it
Ribbon-legged, she passes by
She walks by as if nothing is wrong, but she is weak
Until she surrenders in the midst of the street
She can't keep going and falls in the middle of the street
And the guys simply stare but continue to eat
People see her fall, but ignore it and keep eating
Forget I said it
Just ignore what I said
I soliloquize
I talk to myself
A stinging nettle
A sharp, painful thought
Their hands on their thighs
They're sitting and resting with their hands on their lap
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight, yeah, yeah
If you took even a small bit of happiness or light, go away and don't come back
Don't ever tell them, I've got your back, yeah, yeah
Don't expect help or support from anyone else
Choking to tears with shards of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Overwhelmed with sadness and regret, even with a little bit of happiness
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Leave and don't come back if you took any joy or hope
God, god, god, god
Repeated mention of God as if questioning his existence or relevance
Lyrics © Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.
Written by: Heloise Letissier
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
Alexis Luke
Such an incredible song, video clip and story arch! The theatricality of her work is unrivalled and I respect her work so much.
As a sufferer of mental health, I relate to this song more then anything else I've ever listened to. People's interpretations are equally valid. For me, I believe the male dancer is representative of 'hope' that people attempt to give those who struggle with suicidal ideation or mental health. Chris refers to this male figure as the "sunstealer" I think?... but in France he represents hope. The main thing I take from this song is (and
I'm selecting the lyrics that I think summarise the narrative for me):
"And of lately the only people I can stare are the unravelled ones with their hands laying bear. Their hands are numb and empty, their dull silence soothes me, loud whispers in my back as if I couldn't hear, thought I left ghosts behind but their just coming near...Those suicidal thoughts that are still in my head... doesn't matter, does it? If I know any exit, if I believe in God and if God does exist... If I could just push this door chalked on the wall, and if after the void there's somewhere else to fall... Forget I said it, I soliloquise... (Talking to the "Sunstealer') Choking to tears with shards of sunlight [hope], run if you stole a shard of sunlight. RUN! Save all you can! You wont be found. And never come back!"
Basically - The only people I can bare to stand are those like me - numb and empty. They get me. If my suicidal thoughts are still in my head, does it reeeaally matter that I know how to kill myself? It doesn't matter! Stop trying to help me. I don't want your 'hope'... So f**k off, run away, and never come back!!
bellamorts
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I'm lingering on when they kiss
Leaning towards this abyss
And of lately the only people I can stare
Are the unraveled ones with their hands laying bare
But their hands are numb and empty
Their dull silence soothes me
Loud whispers in my back as if I couldn't hear
Thought I left ghosts behind but they're just coming near
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
Rage as a fabric, through and through
Like that gaze they used to do
'Cause the suicidal thoughts that are still in my head
Gives her that awful side-smile when I lay in bed
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
She's barely feeding, but she'll deny
Ribbon-legged, she passes by
Until she surrenders in the midst of the street
And the guys simply stare but continue to eat
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
And if I am cast out 'cause I wanted some more
And if this guy dances way too close to the shore
And if I could just push this door chalked on the wall
And if after the void there's somewhere else to fall
Forget I said it
I soliloquize
A stinging nettle
Their hands on their thighs
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Don't ever tell them, I've got your back, yeah, yeah
Choking to tears with shards of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight (oh, run)
Don't ever tell them, I've got your back (save all you can)
Choking to tears with shards of sunlight (oh, you won't be found)
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight (oh, and never come back)
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
God, god, god, god
God, god, god, god
God, god, god, god
God, god, god
Aaron Johnstone
I'm lingering on when they kiss
Leaning towards this abyss
And of lately the only people I can stare
Are the unraveled ones with their hands laying bare
But their hands are numb and empty
Their dull silence soothes me
Loud whispers in my back as if I couldn't hear
Thought I left ghosts behind but they're just coming near
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
Rage as a fabric, through and through
Like that gaze they used to do
'Cause the suicidal thoughts that are still in my head
Gives her that awful side-smile when I lay in bed
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
She's barely feeding, but she'll deny
Ribbon-legged, she passes by
Until she surrenders in the midst of the street
And the guys simply stare but continue to eat
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
And if I am cast out 'cause I wanted some more
And if this guy dances way too close to the shore
And if I could just push this door chalked on the wall
And if after the void there's somewhere else to fall
Forget I said it
I soliloquize
A stinging nettle
Their hands on their thighs
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Don't ever tell them, I've got your back, yeah, yeah
Choking to tears with shards of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight, yeah, yeah
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight (oh, run)
Don't ever tell them, I've got your back (save all you can)
Choking to tears with shards of sunlight (oh, you won't be found)
Run if you stole a shard of sunlight (oh, and never come back)
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
It doesn't matter, does it
If I know any exit
If I believe in god and if god does exist
If I believe in god and if god does exist
God, god, god, god
God, god, god, god
God, god, god, god
God, god, god
mary maude
i've been struggling my whole life with wether i'm too masculine for a girl or that i feel like a jerk when wearing feminine clothes. this song pushes me so hard to wear whatever i find beautiful and to just look like the genderqueer person i am. i'll think of christine when people give me confused looks. she is so beautiful in her own majestic way.
Noluthando Dlamini
Sending love from South Africa.
Alfie Barnett
I've come to realise that you live your life for yourself. Worrying of what other people think of you means shit as they are not living your life. Make your life count, be who you want to be and fuck everyone else you beautiful person xxx
Castledark Dweller
enigmaticstatic 7 bloody great reply mate. thankyou. something in that for all of us i reckon.
Castledark Dweller
@Alfie Barnett christ Alfie. ANOTHER beautiful reply. so much wisdom here.
Huntington's Disease awareness
yass queen!
Kurt634
I started screaming CHRISTINE & THE QUEENS CHRISTINE & THE QUEENS to my best friend when this came on 😂 made me so happy to see one of their songs in Heartstopper 💛
Scott Hawley
I was introduced to Christine and the queens from rupauls drags race many years ago! I wish I discovered them earlier!
AdMultiCal7
This song perfectly illustrates the metaphor between trying to trust again after giving up on love and the cycle of abuse, baggage, trauma, loss, and spirituality: Christine and the Queens have a profound message here for everyone -- and every time you watch the video and with the song and think of someone else--or yourself--you can understand just how powerful this dynamic creation is to help anyone find a way to love, trust, or just move on with their lives...and find themselves eventually.
Stephen Smith
Possibly one of the most amazing dance routines I’ve ever seen—so intense, the tension between male and female, at times the male is embraced with joy and playfulness, other times he’s rejected violently and sent running—beautifully captured and fantastically edited. Bravo, les deux!