Downsides Of Being Honest
Columbus Lyrics

I listen to the radio sometimes when I'm home alone
I'm alone with my thoughts and feelings, so I turn to the radio for comfort.

Thinking about the days we spent and the nights I waited next to the telephone
I reflect on memories of us and the times I hoped you'd call me back.

(You never called)
Despite my waiting, you never contacted me.

I can hear my heartbeat, punch through the silence,
When I'm alone, my heartbeat is the only sound I can hear-- a constant reminder of my feelings.

When I'm lying in bed with my headphones on
I use music to distract me from my thoughts and emotions.

It's probably all my fault that you're gone
I blame myself for the end of our relationship.

And I've been coughing ever since I heard you leave
Your departure has physically affected me.

And then I went straight back to sleep
Despite the emotions I'm feeling, I sleep to escape them.

I wish the bags under my eyes weren't as heavy as my head
My exhaustion is visible; I wish it wasn't so noticeable.

And I'll wait till you come home, look through the window at the streets below
I hold onto hope that you'll return, and I'll continue to wait and watch for you.

One of the downsides of being honest is I'll be sleeping on my own
I'm honest about my feelings, but being honest with myself means facing the fact that I'm alone.

I knew you couldn't wait for me to leave at 6am.
I sense that you were eager for me to go in the morning.

The coldness of your skin reminded me of the last time I held your hand (I feel nothing)
Being close to you doesn't give me the same warmth and comfort as it once did.

And I can feel your heartbeat, push through my t- shirt as we lie awake at 2am.
Even when we're physically close, I feel a distance between us.

I know that you are thinking the same thing.
I'm aware that you too are struggling with our relationship.

Sometimes it's hard, thinking fuck letting go
It's difficult to imagine moving on and letting go of what we had.

of all the things you've held so tightly, and that you'll never know
You'll never know how much I cared for you and how much it hurt to let go.

How it feels to be loved by somebody else, there's a hole inside my chest that could never be filled
The thought of being loved by someone else doesn't bring me comfort, and I feel like something is missing within me.