If
Dames Lyrics


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Ain't no salt in the Kitchen
Angry neighbor at the door
I sure know what I've been missing
The sweet lady I Love
The way she smiles makes me dizzy
The way she sneeze makes me laugh
Her warm breath on my shoulder
She's the best and that's that
Now I ain't no daddy just a son of a gun
And she sat me down and said listen here son
While the worlds a mess and love still stinks
Sittin' with you just gets me thinking
Woah oh where'd we go
Roller skating dinner and a show
If Love Stinks lord let's get stinky give me your word and I'll give you my pinky
Well she likes to give me trouble
Poke some fun at me
Normally I'd get unsettled
But she's sweeter then a bee
If love is right it don't expire
And if it does you go to bed
Wake up early in the morning
Praise the words that she said
Now I ain't no daddy just a son of a gun
And she sat me down and said listen here son
While the worlds a mess and love still stinks
Sittin' with you just gets me thinking
Woah oh where'd we go
Roller skating dinner and a show
If Love Stinks then let's get stinky
Give me your word and I'll give you my pinky
If love stinks lord let's get kinky
Pulling on my hair and looking for my pinky




If Love Stinks then let's get stinky
Give me your word and ill give you my pinky

Overall Meaning

Dames's song If is about the power of love to overcome any obstacles, even when things may not seem perfect. The singer expresses his love for his partner, describing her sweet smile and infectious laughter. The lyrics convey that love is not always easy, as seen through the line, "While the world's a mess and love still stinks," but the singer and his partner are committed to one another despite any challenges. The song also explores the idea that love can be both sweet and spicy, as the singer jokes about getting "kinky" with his partner.


The first verse sets the tone for the rest of the song by juxtaposing the image of an angry neighbor at the door with the singer's love and admiration for his partner. The second verse introduces the idea that love is not just for the young and that it can still be valid as one grows older. The chorus reinforces the theme of love's power to bring joy to life, as the singer exclaims, "If Love Stinks lord let's get stinky / give me your word and I'll give you my pinky."


Overall, the song is a celebration of the ups and downs of love, and how it has the ability to bring people together and make life more enjoyable.


Line by Line Meaning

Ain't no salt in the Kitchen
There is a shortage of salt in the kitchen


Angry neighbor at the door
The neighbor is quarreling and seems angry


I sure know what I've been missing
I realize what I have been missing


The sweet lady I Love
I love the woman who is sweet to me


The way she smiles makes me dizzy
Her smile is so enchanting that it makes me feel dizzy


The way she sneeze makes me laugh
Even her sneezing makes me laugh


Her warm breath on my shoulder
I love it when she breathes warmly on my shoulder


She's the best and that's that
She is the best and that's final


Now I ain't no daddy just a son of a gun
I am not a father, just a regular guy


And she sat me down and said listen here son
She took me aside and spoke to me like a father would to his son


While the worlds a mess and love still stinks
Despite the chaos in the world, love can still be problematic


Sittin' with you just gets me thinking
Being with you makes me ponder over things


Woah oh where'd we go
Where have we ended up?


Roller skating dinner and a show
A roller skating event followed by dinner and a show


If Love Stinks lord let's get stinky give me your word and I'll give you my pinky
If love is bad, then let's be bad; I promise you this on my pinky finger


Well she likes to give me trouble
She likes to tease me


Poke some fun at me
She makes fun of me playfully


Normally I'd get unsettled
Usually, her teasing would unsettle me


But she's sweeter then a bee
But she is so sweet and adorable


If love is right it don't expire
True love lasts forever


And if it does you go to bed
And if it comes to an end, you sleep on it


Wake up early in the morning
Wake up early in the morning


Praise the words that she said
Appreciate the kind and loving things she has said


If Love Stinks lord let's get stinky give me your word and I'll give you my pinky
If love is bad, then let's be bad; I promise you this on my pinky finger


If love stinks lord let's get kinky
If love is bad, then let's do something wild


Pulling on my hair and looking for my pinky
Playing with my hair and searching for my pinky promise


If Love Stinks then let's get stinky
If love is bad, then let's indulge in it


Give me your word and ill give you my pinky
Promise me and I'll pinky swear to it




Lyrics © DistroKid
Written by: Derek Ohl

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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Comments from YouTube:

Ariel Oviedo

Lenny Zakatek & Eric Woolfson...The best singers of Alan Parsons!!!

Charles Fiddler

This guy's no slouch.

Colonel FOG

My favorite Alan Parsons song. Thanks for posting it!

Fernando Catan

Mine too! Especially The original one from Eve sung by Lenny Zakatek!

Lorena Pasquetti

Colonel anche "a turn of a friendly card" e' stupenda. La conosci? Salutoni dall'Italia 🤩

The Spartan Airman

I've been looking for this since I was a kid and would hear this in department stores and on the radio but never knew the name.

Mary Watson

This song is so beautiful it gives me goosebumps and makes me weep. I played it over and over going through my divorce over 40 years ago! Still as special as ever but in a different way now. Thank you Alan and everyone who contributed to this gem.

Ade Car

El vocalista es un magnífico intérprete y canta con un gran sentimiento las baladas que hasta me hace estremecer y además muy atractivo

ONLY BOSS LION 🦁☀️

Never heard this before. It fits! Great Band! It’s the real story in some peoples world.

Matt Warren

APP Music holds up decade after decade...great seeing this tonight...of course the original musicians as a group will always be the best in my mind...Hats off to this tour group....as I remember APP in the day did not tour much...but man they were fantastic tonight 💥🥇

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