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by Dane Cook

There are some things I have learned in my recent past
That I'm excited to share with you tonight
And one thing I've realized is that we all want to leave
Behind a legacy
We all want to be remembered for something
And then I was thinking going, how can I be remembered
And then I suddenly realized you can do it on a daily
Even if it?s one on one with people
For example, the other day, I saw a young boy
And he was eating an ice cream cone
I ran up and I smashed it into his face

I leaned in, I go, you remember me forever and I ran away
Cause you know when he's 50, he's gonna be like
One day a man ran up to me, I did not know this man
He smashed my treat into my eyes. And he pointed and said
"You fuckin remember me forever."?
But I did not say fuckin, I did not say that.
He added fuckin to make the story more intense and
He deserves to have ice cream smashed in his face,
Cause he?s a lying 50 year old man. I did NOT say fuckin.

Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group

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