His comic material is mostly observational humor. His recent routines include such diverse topics as car accident mayhem, Cook's time spent working at Burger King and assorted geek humor. Cook often refers to specific places or things using his own slang terms. For instance: Burger King is the "BK Lounge" (a phrase first used by De La Soul), Walgreens is "The Wall" , and a sandwich is a "sangwich". He also popularized the acronym BAMF, short for Bad Ass Mother Fucker, a slight variation on the more-common and widely-used "BMF", or "Bad Mother Fucker". Among Cook's numerous television credits are performances on Comedy Central Presents and Comedy Central Bar Mitzvah Bash.
He is often referred to as 'the most popular guy on MySpace' (next to Tom Anderson, the creator of the service), because at one time he approved every friend request he received -- recently hitting one million.
Career
When he was a teenager, Dane discovered his comedic talent when his father, former radio personality George Cook, gave him a tape recorder and microphone. He was inspired by watching and listening to a variety of comedians, including Bill Cosby, Johnny Carson, George Carlin and even Red Skelton. In seventh grade he watched Saturday Night Live one night and saw Martin Short performing his character Ed Grimley. He suddenly realized a goal in life: to be on the show.
He started performing stand-up comedy in 1990. By 1995, Cook was performing stand-up comedy every night, usually in Boston and, when he made it to Los Angeles, at The Laugh Factory. He stated in a 2005 interview with Entertainment Weekly that he "never walked toward a stage and felt heavy. Ever. Even in bad places, I always learned something." Also in 1995, Cook made his television debut as Kyle in five episodes of the short-lived ABC series Maybe This Time, starring Marie Osmond and Betty White.
In 1999, he made his first (albeit brief) appearance in a major motion picture as "The Waffler" (a superhero who uses a waffle iron and "truth syrup" to fight crime) in Mystery Men. A year earlier, he was featured on Comedy Central's stand-up comedy showcase Premium Blend and, the following year, Comics Come Home. It would begin a partnership with the cable channel that would help launch Cook's career to new heights. He made his own half-hour feature segment on Comedy Central Presents in 2000.
1999 also saw Cook starring in the straight-to-video Dennis Rodman vehicle, Simon Sez. Often thought to be a sequel to the mildly successful Jean Claude Van Damme film, Simon Sez actually has nothing to do with Double Team. In the film Cook plays Rodman's partner, Nick Miranda. The film was directed by Kevin Elders, previously known as the screenwriter for Aces: Iron Eagle III.
Two years later, Cook pooled $25,000 of his own money from savings and retirement accounts and launched DaneCook.com, his own interactive website to help further his career and help stay personally connected to his fans. Although other comics mocked him, his website, along with his MySpace account, turned out to be a success.
In 2003, Cook released his first comedy album, Harmful If Swallowed, which also included a DVD of his appearances on Comedy Central.
In 2003 Dane Cook also released the film 8 Guys, which he wrote, directed, and starred in.
2005 to present
In 2005, Cook launched a nationwide tour dubbed "Tourgasm" (highlights from which aired as "Dane Cook's Tourgasm." It debuted on HBO June 11, 2006) as a follow up to his second album Retaliation, which debuted at #4 on Billboard magazine's Top Albums chart, the most successful comedy album debut since Steve Martin's A Wild and Crazy Guy in 1979. Cook wore a T-shirt depicting Steve Martin and "A Wild And Crazy Guy" at the 2006 MTV Movie Awards.
The album's success launched a slew of public appearances and magazine articles that fall, including a three-minute routine on the MTV Video Music Awards on August 28. He also performed three sold-out shows in two nights at The Theater at Madison Square Garden, a 2,500 to 5,000 seat venue, in mid-September without any press but his own website.
During a May 2005 appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live, Cook parodied Tom Cruise's "couch jumping" Oprah appearance and made a "tattoo" of Katie Holmes (actually a picture taped to his back), barging into the women's restroom to get her.
During a October 2005 appearance on The Tonight Show, he kissed Charlize Theron's butt after she allowed him to do so. Cook was re-enacting a previous joke/act in which Charlize kissed Shirley MacLaine's butt at a Premiere magazine tribute to women in Hollywood.
He also appeared and performed on Dave Attell's Insomniac Tour.
He finished his own television pilot called Cooked, which he is writing and starring in, soon afterwards.
On December 3, 2005, Cook finally realized his dream of hosting Saturday Night Live. His appearance was unique because he was one of the few stand-up comedians (as opposed to actors) to appear as guest host for the show. He performed the longest monologue in the show's history while using a handheld microphone, another rarity for SNL. The episode was one of the highest-rated SNLs of the season.
On January 13, 2006, after months of keeping a "BIG secret" from his fans, he announced via his website an April 15 gig at Boston's TD Banknorth Garden where his first HBO special was eventually filmed. A documentary series and a scripted program are also in the works for HBO. In the week prior to the televised gig, he performed at the Mandalay Bay Resort in Las Vegas (April 8) and Allstate Arena in Chicago (April 13), the largest venues he's ever performed in those cities.
Sadly, his mother, Donna Cook passed away after a long bout with cancer on July 3rd.
Cook was in Santa Fe, New Mexico working on a movie called Employee of the Month, a comedy co-starring Jessica Simpson (who he's been linked to romantically by the tabloid press), Dax Shepard, Efren Ramirez and Harland Williams.
He is also currently filming the psychological thriller Mr. Brooks in Shreveport, Louisiana with Kevin Costner. In 2006, he was named in Time magazine's list of the 100 most influential people of 2006.
Cook plans on touring the country with other comedians including Steve Carell.
While shooting a movie in Vancouver, Dane Cook made the local papers for his behavior in a comedy club. His actions were called "very immature". Dane Cook has yet to make comment on this event.
The Super Finger
The Super Finger or Su-Fi is a hand gesture. It was not created by Dane Cook, although he has adopted as such. It consists of raising the middle finger, ring finger, and thumb on the same hand while lowering (or curling) the index and pinky fingers. Cook's website explains his idea behind the Su-Fi:
"One night I did a bit on stage about 5 years ago at the Laugh Factory. I was talking about how the finger is lame now and it's lost its pizzazz. I said I wanted to upgrade the finger and so from now on people should use both the ring finger coupled with the middle finger. I called it the SUPERFINGER (or SU-FI)."
Cook is considered to be double-jointed.
In 2005, Cook started his own company to produce his albums and videos, which he named Superfinger Entertainment.
Material controversy
After the release of his immensely successful CD / DVD Retaliation, many fans of comedy took note of three bits on Cook's CD. On June 10, 1999, comedian Louis C.K. performed stand-up on Late Night with Conan O'Brien, one of the bits being about naming kids and wanting to name his kid with one letter repeated many times. On CK's debut CD, Louis CK: Live in Houston, which was released in 2000, CK had a bit called "Itchy Asshole". CK has also performed a routine on both his CD, Late Night, and other television programs called "Guy on a Bike", which was a routine about witnessing someone struck by a car and wondering how quickly to warn someone before the accident. In 2005, Dane Cook performed and released three similar routines on Retaliation. CK commented on the similarities, noting what he considered clear examples of cribbing material, but said that he did not intend to act on these findings. For his part, Cook has yet to respond.
Vancouver Yuk-Yuk's
On Saturday, July 22, 2006, Dane Cook was played off the stage at Yuk Yuk's comedy club in Vancouver. Cook was in town for six weeks shooting a film with Jessica Alba and his agent had requested a slot for him, after that night's headliner.
When he arrived Cook wanted an earlier set, so he was given the slot before the headliner with the understanding that he do less time. He either could not see or ignored the red light so the club's manager cut his mic and tried to play him off with music. Cook was quite surprised by this but continued his act, until the manager cut his mic and tried to play him off again; this time it was successful, resulting in Cook dropping his mic in a fit of anger and walking off the stage.
Superpowers
Dane Cook Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Maybe quit comedy, fight some crime. Everybody wants to fly. That's the
number one power. If I could grant you a power, "Dane, I'd love to fly."
Yeah? Who the fuck doesn't. Who doesn't want to leave the show tonight
and be like, "Alright I'll catch you guys later." *Shwwooosh* and zip up into
the skies. "I can show you the world. Shining, shimmering splendor."
I'd love to shoot a laser out of my cock. And when I'm empty my balls glow.
You know what I'd like to be able to do more than anything else? I'd love to
be able to shoot spaghetti out of my fingertips. *Pppthhh.* 'Cause no one
wants to be covered in spaghetti. No. If I'm on a date with a girl and she's
very rude I'll be like, you know what? *PPpptthhh* Enjoy your spaghetti
you're very rude. Enjoy your spaghetti, 'cause you're rude. *Pppttthh*
These are all dreams. These are all things we want to have.
(To man in audience) If I could grant you a power, any power, what would
you want? Anything right now? "Dah, Jesus." You want to be Jesus? God
you're such an egotistical prick. He thinks he's Jesus. Ah, Jesus. I'd love to
cover him with spaghetti right now. *Ppppttthh* Enjoy your spaghetti,
you're very egotistical.
Ahhh, Christ. *pause* (to man in audience) Not you.
In this comedic skit, Dane Cook ponders about having superpowers and what he would do with them. He starts off by saying that he wishes he had some superpowers which leads him down the path of quitting comedy and fighting crime. The most coveted superpower being to be able to fly which he mocks by singing "I can show you the world, shining, shimmering splendor" from the Aladdin movie. He then goes on to say that he would like to shoot a laser out of his penis and when he is empty, his balls will glow. Cook then jokes that he would love to shoot spaghetti out of his fingertips so he could hit rude people in the face with it. Cook concludes by saying that these are all just dreams, things that people wish they could have or do.
The lyrics of this song are a satirical take on how people always talk about wanting superpowers, but never really consider the implications of having them. Cook uses humor to comment on the unrealistic expectations that people have about superpowers while simultaneously poking fun at the idea of masculinity and the male ego, as seen with the laser joke.
Line by Line Meaning
I wish I had some superpowers. I was thinking about that the other day.
Dane Cook is expressing his desire to have superpowers and it is something that he had thought about recently.
Maybe quit comedy, fight some crime. Everybody wants to fly. That's the
number one power.
Dane Cook muses that he might quit comedy and become a crime fighter. He believes that everyone desires to fly and that it is the most popular superpower.
If I could grant you a power, "Dane, I'd love to fly."
Yeah? Who the fuck doesn't. Who doesn't want to leave the show tonight
and be like, "Alright I'll catch you guys later." *Shwwooosh* and zip up into
the skies. "I can show you the world. Shining, shimmering splendor."
Dane Cook talks about his desire to grant others superpowers, especially the power to fly. He emphasizes that everyone dreams of soaring into the air and having an amazing experience flying like Aladdin did in the movie.
I'd love to shoot a laser out of my cock. And when I'm empty my balls glow.
Low fuel. Balls are empty.
Dane Cook jokes about the absurdity of having a laser beam come out of his penis. He continues the vulgar joke by stating that when he's out of ammo, his testicles would glow indicating that he's empty, like a car running low on fuel.
You know what I'd like to be able to do more than anything else? I'd love to
be able to shoot spaghetti out of my fingertips. *Pppthhh.* 'Cause no one
wants to be covered in spaghetti. No.
Dane Cook shares another bizarre desire - the ability to shoot cooked spaghetti from his fingertips. He explains that it would be a useful superpower in situations where he wants to annoy someone by covering them in food, like an annoying date.
These are all dreams. These are all things we want to have.
Dane Cook reflects on how these fantasies are only dreams that everyone desires and wishes to have.
(To man in audience) If I could grant you a power, any power, what would
you want? Anything right now? "Dah, Jesus." You want to be Jesus? God
you're such an egotistical prick. He thinks he's Jesus. Ah, Jesus. I'd love to
cover him with spaghetti right now. *Ppppttthh* Enjoy your spaghetti,
you're very egotistical.
Dane Cook asks a man in the audience what superpower he would want, and the man jokingly answers that he wants to be Jesus. Dane responds with a sarcastic remark, calling him an egotistical prick, and jokes about throwing spaghetti at him for his rudeness.
Ahhh, Christ. *pause* (to man in audience) Not you.
Dane Cook reacts to the previous joke, calling out to the man in the audience that he can relax and that the joke wasn't directed at him.
Contributed by Alice D. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
Katelyn Warren
I'd want to be covered in spaghetti head to toe it's my fave food XD
J Ro
“Enjoy your spaghetti, you’re very egotistical.” 😂
H3LLIC0NIC
The good ol dayz when YouTube wasn't an asshole
deputyseal409
What super powers would you want to have? I'd like to be able to read minds, but not all the time 'cause it'd be annoying. I'd be able to read the minds of whoever I want and whenever I want. if I couldn't have that, I'd love to be able to walk through walls and surprise people. How awesome would that be?
Ivy Girl
Enjoy your spaghetti you're very rude
Charles Haggarty
Lol He Made My Day =)
Ian Fortuna
I’d rather have super strength
Ivy Girl
Who else was watching the stick figure channel before this
Sea Bass
Balls are empty
Glimmer
The guy who says "uh Jesus" sounds like Brad Walst of Three Days Grace