What If
Emilie Autumn Lyrics
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Wonder how the view is from there
I wouldn't know 'cause I like to sit
Upon the floor, yeah upon the floor
If you like we could play a game
Let's pretend that we are the same
But you will have to look much closer
Than you do, closer than you do
And I'm far too tired to stay here anymore
And I don't care what you think anyway
‘Cause I think you were wrong about me
Yeah what if you were, what if you were
And what if I'm a snowstorm burning
What if I'm a world unturning
What if I'm an ocean, far too shallow, much too deep
What if I'm the kindest demon
Something you may not believe in
What if I'm a siren singing gentlemen to sleep
I know you've got it figured out
Tell me what I am all about
And I just might learn a thing or two
Hundred about you, maybe about you
I'm the end of your telescope
I don't change just to suit your vision
‘Cause I am bound by a fraying rope
Around my hands, tied around my hands
And you close your eyes when I say I'm breaking free
And put your hands over both your ears
Because you cannot stand to believe I'm not
The perfect girl you thought
Well what have I got to lose
And what if I'm a weeping willow
Laughing tears upon my pillow
What if I'm a socialite who wants to be alone
What if I'm a toothless leopard
What if I'm a sheepless shepherd
What if I'm an angel without wings to take me home
You don't know me
Never will, never will
I'm outside your picture frame
And the glass is breaking now
You can't see me
Never will, never will
If you're never gonna see
What if I'm a crowded desert
Too much pain with little pleasure
What if I'm the nicest place you never want to go
What if I don't know who I am
Will that keep us both from trying
To find out and when you have
Be sure to let me know
What if I'm a snowstorm burning
What if I'm a world unturning
What if I'm an ocean, far too shallow, much too deep
What if I'm the kindest demon
Something you may not believe in
What if I'm a siren singing gentlemen to sleep
Sleep…
Sleep…
The song Epilogue: What If by Emilie Autumn presents a powerful reflection on the nature of identity and the perception others have of us. The lyrics begin by highlighting the difference between the speaker and the individual sitting in a high-backed chair, as they prefer to sit on the floor. The speaker suggests playing a game in which they pretend to be the same, but the other person needs to look closer to see through the surface differences. The speaker then proclaims they are tired of trying to fit in and no longer cares about the other person's opinion of them.
The chorus introduces a series of "what if" scenarios that challenge the listener's preconceptions about the speaker's identity. Through metaphors like a snowstorm burning, a world unturning, or an ocean that is too shallow or too deep, the speaker challenges the listener to consider the complexity of their identity and how they are perceived. The song's closing lines implore the listener to consider the idea that they may never know the speaker's true identity.
Overall, Epilogue: What If is a poignant and empowering meditation on the complexities of identity and the dangers of placing others in boxes because of our own limited perceptions.
Line by Line Meaning
Here you sit in your high-backed chair
You may have a position of power or authority, but it doesn't make you any better or smarter than anyone else.
Wonder how the view is from there
You might think you have a better view of the world, but you're missing important aspects of reality.
I wouldn't know 'cause I like to sit upon the floor, yeah upon the floor
I don't believe in hierarchies, so I choose to sit at the same level as everyone else, even if it is on the ground.
If you like we could play a game
I'm willing to engage with you, but only if you're willing to play fair.
Let's pretend that we are the same
We can imagine that we have the same experiences and that we are equals, despite our differences.
But you will have to look much closer than you do, closer than you do
You have yet to truly understand who I am and what I stand for. You need to take a closer look and listen harder.
And I'm far too tired to stay here anymore
I'm tired of pretending and playing nice. It's time for me to move on.
And I don't care what you think anyway
Your opinion doesn't define me or my worth as a person.
‘Cause I think you were wrong about me
You've made assumptions about me that are incorrect or don't tell the full story.
Yeah what if you were, what if you were
What if your assumptions or beliefs about who I am are completely off-base?
And what if I'm a snowstorm burning
What if I'm a paradox or something that doesn't fit into conventional categories or definitions?
What if I'm a world unturning
What if I'm something that defies expectations or challenges the status quo?
What if I'm an ocean, far too shallow, much too deep
What if I'm a complex and multifaceted individual, with layers and depths that are not immediately apparent?
What if I'm the kindest demon
What if I'm someone or something that is often associated with evil or darkness, but I have a kind and compassionate nature?
Something you may not believe in
I might challenge your beliefs or expectations, but that doesn't make me any less valid or real.
What if I'm a siren singing gentlemen to sleep
What if I have a power or allure that attracts others, but it's not necessarily a good thing for them?
I know you've got it figured out
You think you understand who I am and what I'm about, but you don't have all the answers.
Tell me what I am all about
You're curious or maybe even judgmental about my identity and motivations.
And I just might learn a thing or two
I'm open to new ideas and perspectives, even if they challenge my own assumptions.
Hundred about you, maybe about you
I might learn something about you in the process, but that's not the main goal of this interaction.
I'm the end of your telescope
I'm just a tiny part of your world, but I might be more significant than you realize.
I don't change just to suit your vision
I'm not going to conform to your expectations or desires, especially if they compromise who I am as a person.
‘Cause I am bound by a fraying rope around my hands, tied around my hands
I might feel trapped or restricted by societal norms or personal circumstances, but I'm trying to break free.
And you close your eyes when I say I'm breaking free
You don't want to acknowledge or accept that I'm trying to change or grow as a person.
And put your hands over both your ears
You're resistant to hearing anything that might challenge your worldview or beliefs.
Because you cannot stand to believe I'm not the perfect girl you thought
You had an idealized or unrealistic image of who I was, and it's difficult for you to let go of that.
Well what have I got to lose
I have nothing left to lose by challenging your assumptions or proving you wrong.
And what if I'm a weeping willow
What if I'm someone who appears sad or fragile, but I have a deep inner strength and resilience?
Laughing tears upon my pillow
I might experience emotions that seem contradictory or inexplicable, but that's just a part of being human.
What if I'm a socialite who wants to be alone
What if I'm someone who seems to have it all, but I'm actually struggling with loneliness or a lack of genuine connections?
What if I'm a toothless leopard
What if I'm someone who might seem dangerous or intimidating, but I'm actually harmless or vulnerable?
What if I'm a sheepless shepherd
What if I'm someone who is supposed to know what to do, but I'm lost or uncertain myself?
What if I'm an angel without wings to take me home
What if I'm someone who feels out of place or misunderstood, and I don't know where I truly belong?
You don't know me
You might think you understand me, but you don't have the whole picture.
Never will, never will
I'm always evolving and changing, so it's impossible for anyone to truly know me.
I'm outside your picture frame
You have a limited scope or perception of who I am, and it doesn't capture my full essence.
And the glass is breaking now
I'm starting to break out of your narrow expectations and definitions of who I am.
You can't see me
You might still be looking for the old version of me that fit into your expectations, but that person doesn't exist anymore.
Never will, never will
You might never fully understand or accept me, but that's okay.
If you're never gonna see
If you're not willing to open your mind or expand your perspective, then you might never truly see who I am.
What if I'm a crowded desert
What if I'm a place that is full of contradictions, complexity, and confusion?
Too much pain with little pleasure
I might experience more pain than joy, but that doesn't mean my life is completely devoid of pleasure or meaning.
What if I'm the nicest place you never want to go
What if I'm somewhere that might seem unappealing or uncomfortable at first, but it ends up being a transformative and rewarding experience?
What if I don't know who I am
What if I'm still figuring things out and exploring my identity and purpose in life?
Will that keep us both from trying
Even if I'm uncertain about myself, I'm still willing to connect and engage with you in a meaningful way.
To find out and when you have
Together, we can discover more about ourselves and each other, but it's a journey that never truly ends.
Be sure to let me know
By sharing our insights and discoveries, we can deepen our understanding of ourselves and the world around us.
Sleep…
Sometimes we need to rest and let our minds and souls recover from the challenges of life.
Sleep…
By taking time for ourselves and being gentle with our needs, we can find the strength to face another day.
Contributed by Lucas P. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
Growing up in Malibu, California, she began learning the violin at the age of four and left regular school five years later with the goal of becoming a world-class violinist; she practiced eight or nine hours a day and read a wide range of literature. Progressing to writing her own music, she studied under various teachers and went to Indiana University, which she left over issues regarding the relationship between classical music and the appearance of the performer. Through her own independent label Traitor Records, Autumn debuted with her classical album On a Day: Music for Violin & Continuo, followed by the release in 2003 of her album Enchant.
She appeared in singer Courtney Love's backing band on her 2004 America's Sweetheart tour and returned to Europe. She released the 2006 album Opheliac with the German label Trisol Music Group. In 2007, she released Laced/Unlaced; the re-release of On a Day... appeared as Laced with songs on the electric violin as Unlaced. She later left Trisol to join New York-based The End Records in 2009 and release Opheliac in the United States, where previously it had only been available as an import. Currently she is on tour to promote her newest album Fight Like A Girl. She played the role of Painted Doll in Darren Lynn Bousman's 2012 film The Devil's Carnival.
PetulantKim
I'm 65 yrs old last week. Emilie is much younger than me, but a kindred spirit and a fellow traveler. nuff said!
Mysanthropiya
Hope you had a wonderful 70th birthday ❤️
omi
Wow
Gala of the Truth
When we are the original we all know who we really are as trust me we both know who we really are and now I know that together we will find out what the truth behind this truth we can really do because now she knows I have proven more than we have believe we could ever return to I'm pretty sure she will be returning to me very soon because we have been wishing for this to be true and I have seen and done what we use to do long before we were human
Elinaboo
I listened to this on repeat when I was younger. Found it again 2021! Still love her
Andrew Ragland
I'm 54, male, and bipolar. Emilie's work appeals to me for a number of reasons. This particular song has a lot to say about how people form opinions of others and then try to work from handy labels instead of seeing the complexities that are actually there.
MadStrawberryPie
I've always loved this song but this is the first time I can fully, fully identify with the lyrics. It feels so different now. I know no one cares but I'm totally fascinated by how much that changes how I feel about this song.
Jessica Abbott
This song was perfect to use as the epilogue, because it provided a “cliffhanger” for Opheliac — that’s there’s a totally different side to her yet to be explored.
HoursofMovies
I love this song! Don't get me wrong. I prefer Emilie Autumn's darker and more Gothic work, but seeing this as the last happy and lighter song before the morbid song 'Opheliac' brings out the sensitivity in me.
Rachel Fourie
Balázs Dukát I’ve always interpreted this as a song about being misunderstood