Shotgun
Evan Bartels Lyrics


Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴  Line by Line Meaning ↴

If I’m being honest
I’m gonna lie to you
When you ask me how I’m doing
I’ll use all the words we both know
You want me too

If I’m being honest
I’ve been thinking about the day
Where I don’t feel anything at all
And I don’t fear anything at all

I’m gonna go
Gonna load my shotgun
Point that barrel right where it hurts.
Ain’t no telling what comes after
Might not be better but it can’t get worse.

I cried out
In silent desperation
I cried out
I called your name
My god, my god
Why have you forsaken me
I cried out
But my words have now abandoned me.

I’m gonna go
Gonna load my shotgun
Point that barrel right where it hurts.
Ain’t no telling what comes after
Might not be better but it can’t get worse.

I could tell you but you can’t imagine
That first breath after nothing happens
You ain’t cried like that since you come out your mother
Hearing that click and thanking god for
Bad primers with good timing





I’m gonna go
Gonna load my shotgun

Overall Meaning

Evan Bartels's song "Shotgun" is a powerful depiction of a person's inner turmoil and desperation. The lyrics paint a picture of a person who is struggling to cope with their emotions while trying to maintain their facade in front of others. The line "If I’m being honest, I’m gonna lie to you" highlights the irony of the situation, where the person is pretending to be okay while actually feeling lost and hopeless.


The chorus, "I'm gonna go, gonna load my shotgun, point that barrel right where it hurts" is a metaphor for the person's internal struggle to overcome their pain. The use of the word 'shotgun' denotes an act of aggression, but in this context, it represents a desperate attempt to fight back against the pain. The person acknowledges that there might be consequences to their actions, but they are willing to take the risk as they feel like it's their only option.


The bridge of the song, "I cried out in silent desperation, I cried out, I called your name, my god, my god, why have you forsaken me, I cried out but my words have abandoned me" highlights the person's feeling of helplessness and loneliness. They feel like they have nowhere else to turn, and even their faith has abandoned them.


In summary, Evan Bartels's song "Shotgun" is a powerful portrayal of a person's struggle to cope with their inner demons while trying to maintain a facade in front of others. The song's raw and honest portrayal of the human condition makes it relatable and emotionally charged.


Line by Line Meaning

If I’m being honest
To be truthful, I will deceive you


I’m gonna lie to you
I will not tell you the truth


When you ask me how I’m doing
If asked how I am, I will not be truthful


I’ll use all the words we both know
I will use familiar words to deceive you


You want me too
You expect me to do so


If I’m being honest
To be truthful, I have thoughts


I’ve been thinking about the day
I have had thoughts about a future time


Where I don’t feel anything at all
I would feel an absence of emotion


And I don’t fear anything at all
I would not be afraid of anything


I’m gonna go
I will leave


Gonna load my shotgun
I will prepare my firearm


Point that barrel right where it hurts.
Aim it directly at a sensitive area


Ain’t no telling what comes after
It's uncertain what will happen next


Might not be better but it can’t get worse.
Things might not improve, but they couldn't be worse


I cried out
I shouted for help


In silent desperation
Without making any sound, feeling hopeless


I called your name
I asked for your assistance


My god, my god
My deity, my deity


Why have you forsaken me
Why have you abandoned me?


I cried out
I shouted for help


But my words have now abandoned me.
I am now unable to express myself clearly


I could tell you but you can’t imagine
I could explain it, but you wouldn't comprehend


That first breath after nothing happens
The initial inhalation after experiencing nothing


You ain’t cried like that since you come out your mother
You haven't cried like that since birth


Hearing that click and thanking god for
Hearing the sound of the trigger and being grateful for


Bad primers with good timing
Faulty parts but perfect circumstances


I’m gonna go
I will leave


Gonna load my shotgun
I will prepare my firearm


Point that barrel right where it hurts.
Aim it directly at a sensitive area


Ain’t no telling what comes after
It's uncertain what will happen next


Might not be better but it can’t get worse.
Things might not improve, but they couldn't be worse




Lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
Written by: Evan George Bartels, OurVinyl

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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Most interesting comments from YouTube:

@benjaminlucas8427

@@jaredjared1 Chorus repeating, even after the 'redemption' verse, is standard writing trope, you sell the hook one last time. For a song like this, spinning a completely different chorus at the end of the song would break storytelling and undermine the power of the last verse.

Regarding the third verse, it's:
"I could tell you, but you can't imagine, that first breath on the edge of death's chasm.
You aint cried like that since you come out your mother.
The only thing holding back the great hear-after,
Is bad primers, with good timing."

- That first breath after you pulled the trigger & it failed, crying like a newborn baby, cause you're alive, & realizing that a 0.0003% chance is the only reason you're still here. Those kind of odds make you think about things.



@Integritydefins

If I'm being honest

I'm gonna lie to you

When you ask me how I'm doing

Ill use all the words we both know

You want me to

If I'm being honest

I've been thinking about the day

Where I don't feel anything at all

I don't fear anything at all

Imma gonna go gonna load my shotgun
Point that barrel right where it hurts
Ain't no telling where ill go after
Might not be better but it can't get worse

I cried out

In silent desperation I cried out

I called your name

My god my god

Why have you forsaken me?

I cried out, when my words have now abandoned me

I'm gonna go gonna load my shotgun
Point that barrel right where it hurts
Ain't no telling where ill go after
Might not be better but it can't get worse

And I could tell you but you can't imagine

That first breathe from the edge of deaths chasm

You ain't cried like that since you come out your mother

Only thing holding back the great here after

Is bad primers with good timing

I'm gonna go gonna load my shotgun
Point that barrel right where it hurts
Ain't no telling where ill go after
Might not be better but it can't get worse



@jlander82

At 11:45, "The only thing holding back the great hereafter... is bad primers with good timing."

For anyone who doesn't know, a primer is what sets off the charge in a cartridge/shotgun shell.... The shell was a dud. So, even though the song is dark, to me this line seems to sound like he avoided going through with it... it brings hope back into it.

But just after that, at 12:04, I think the guitar is intended to sound like a shotgun racking and firing (and in fact he replaces the word "shotgun" with the whole effect). So maybe the hope isn't there after all?

Great instrumentation and an amazing voice though.

No matter where you find yourself, please don't ever go through with suicide; there is always hope!



All comments from YouTube:

@christianrodriguez8446

The fact this song only has 58k views is a crime to music.

@OurVinyl

We don't disagree.

@mard9802

The first time I heard your music was on Michael Palmisano's channel about 25 min's ago. And you're a wonderful artist.

@gisz0

Same here, came from Michael as well. All can I say is... what a great artist, and powerful song! It hits you real hard after a bunch of listens.

@OurVinyl

Glad you're here! You can see Evan's entire OurVinyl Session here: https://youtu.be/f7ISjXDf7kk

@mard9802

@@OurVinyl CD ordered yesterday and looking forward to getting it!

@alecbissey2227

Same. Holy freaking crap. I owe so many songs to Michael.

@flipmode155

Also here thanks to Michael, what a amazing talent this guy is!!

15 More Replies...

@amyklinkhammer4983

I have never in my life every seen a music video this powerful and authentic and heart wrenching with such genuine passion.
..speechless

@camodown

There is a conundrum to songs like this. You want to live in it when you first hear it and play it on repeat but at the same time you don’t want to lose the feeling you had when you first heard it by over playing it.

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