How The Pigs' Music Works
Frank Zappa Lyrics


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Spider: I think I can explain about about how the pigs' music works
Monica: Well, this should be interesting
Spider: Remember that they make music with a very dense light
John: Yeah
Monica: O.K.
Spider: And remember about the smoke standing still and how they they really get uptight when you try to move the smoke, right?
Monica: Right
John: Yeah?
Spider: I think the music in that dense light is probably what makes the smoke stand still. As soon as the pony's mane starts to get good in the back any sort of motion, especially of smoke or gas, begins to make the ends split
Monica: Well don't the splitting ends change the density of the ponies' music so it affects the density of the pigs' music, which makes the smoke move which upsets the pigs?
Spider: No, it isn't like that
John: Well, how does it work?
Spider: Well, what it does is when it strikes any sort of energy field or solid object or even something as ephemeral as smoke, the first thing it does is begins to inactivate the molecular motion so that it slows down and finally stops. That's why the smoke stops. And also have you ever noticed how the the smoke clouds shrink up? That's because the molecules come closer together. The cold light makes it get so small, this is really brittle smoke
John: And that's why the pigs don't want you to touch it
Spider: See, when the smoke gets that brittle what happens when you try to move it is it disintegrates
John: And the pigs get uptight 'cause you know they, they worship that smoke. They salute it every day
Monica: You know we've got something here




John: And, and, and, and that's the basis of all their nationalism. Like if they can't salute the smoke every morning when they get up . . .
Spider: Yeah, it's a vicious circle. You got it

Overall Meaning

The above lyrics are a humorous conversation between the characters Spider, Monica, and John, who are trying to explain the concept of the pigs' music and how it works. According to Spider, the pigs make music with a dense light which has an effect on the smoke. The smoke stands still when the pigs play music because the music's density interacts with the smoke molecules to slow down its molecular motion, which in turn causes the smoke to stop moving. Spider goes on to explain that the smoke also shrinks up because the cold light makes it brittle, and the pigs worship this brittle smoke.


The conversation between the characters is a satire of the complexity of music theory and the often-confusing language used to describe it. It's also a commentary on human behavior and how we can create elaborate belief systems based on trivial things. The lyrics suggest that the pigs' nationalism, which revolves around their worship of the smoke, is a meaningless and self-perpetuating cycle.


Overall, "How the Pigs' Music Works" is a witty and thought-provoking song that pokes fun at human foibles while also challenging our assumptions about the nature of music and sound.


Line by Line Meaning

Spider: I think I can explain about about how the pigs' music works
Spider believes he can explain how the pigs' music works


Monica: Well, this should be interesting
Monica expresses interest in Spider's explanation


Spider: Remember that they make music with a very dense light
Spider reminds the group that the pigs make music with dense light


John: Yeah
John shows agreement


Monica: O.K.
Monica confirms her understanding


Spider: And remember about the smoke standing still and how they they really get uptight when you try to move the smoke, right?
Spider reminds the group about how the pigs react when someone moves the smoke they worship


Monica: Right
Monica confirms her understanding


John: Yeah?
John seeks further explanation


Spider: I think the music in that dense light is probably what makes the smoke stand still. As soon as the pony's mane starts to get good in the back any sort of motion, especially of smoke or gas, begins to make the ends split
Spider hypothesizes that the pigs' music in dense light makes the smoke stand still and that any movement causes it to split


Monica: Well don't the splitting ends change the density of the ponies' music so it affects the density of the pigs' music, which makes the smoke move which upsets the pigs?
Monica suggests that the density change in the ponies' music due to split smoke affects the density of the pigs' music, causing the smoke to move and upsetting the pigs


Spider: No, it isn't like that
Spider disagrees with Monica's suggestion


John: Well, how does it work?
John seeks further explanation


Spider: Well, what it does is when it strikes any sort of energy field or solid object or even something as ephemeral as smoke, the first thing it does is begins to inactivate the molecular motion so that it slows down and finally stops. That's why the smoke stops. And also have you ever noticed how the the smoke clouds shrink up? That's because the molecules come closer together. The cold light makes it get so small, this is really brittle smoke
Spider explains that the dense light inactivates molecular motion, causing the smoke to stop and the molecules to come closer together, making it brittle


John: And that's why the pigs don't want you to touch it
John deduces that the pigs don't want anyone to touch the brittle smoke


Spider: See, when the smoke gets that brittle what happens when you try to move it is it disintegrates
Spider explains that brittle smoke disintegrates when moved


John: And the pigs get uptight 'cause you know they, they worship that smoke. They salute it every day
John explains that the pigs get upset when someone touches the smoke they worship and salute daily


Monica: You know we've got something here
Monica acknowledges the group's newfound understanding


John: And, and, and, and that's the basis of all their nationalism. Like if they can't salute the smoke every morning when they get up . . .
John suggests that the pigs' nationalism is based on their ability to salute the smoke daily


Spider: Yeah, it's a vicious circle. You got it
Spider agrees and concludes that it is a vicious circle




Lyrics © Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.
Written by: Frank Vincent Zappa

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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