Fresh Off A breakup is a static collective music group, made up of producer… Read Full Bio ↴Fresh Off A breakup is a static collective music group, made up of producers, writers, musicians, and artist. The core members include Eric L. Mims (E.Mims, Mr.Excitement), Maurice Barnett-Fenderson (Pro Reese), John Patrick III (Jbyo), and Michael White (Shorty Bang).

Collectively they have placed music on artists such as, Wale, Yg 400, Slim 400, Glasses Malone, Badd Lucc, Cali Swagg District, to note a few. The have licensed music to networks, such as, ABC, ESPN, Showtime, and CBS, for a variety of shows and uses.

Each of them also have released solo projects as artist and producers. So you may hear instrumentals, or a variety of other artist on their tracks, as anyone can purchase them.

Most of them were raised in Compton, California, one was raised in Long beach. They were influenced heavily by the rich history of hip hop that was cultivated in Compton and Long Beach, which continue to be hotbeds of talented artist, and hope to one day become more than a footnote.

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I Know where I'm At
Fresh Off A Break up Lyrics

No lyrics text found for this track.

The lyrics are frequently found in the comments by searching or by filtering for lyric videos

Most interesting comments from YouTube:

@deportedsouls3165

34w↑4

1. See this as an unavoidable life-lesson/experience. And something that will make you grow.
2. Focus on rebuilding/strenghten the different "legs of the chair". One leg is health, including fitness and eating right. Another leg is other relationships, like friends, family etc. A third is wealth, finances, which you build by improving your skills and competence.

If these three legs are strong enough, the fourth (romantic relationships) can be replaced once you are ready.

Summary: The remaining three legs of the chair, are there to hold you up during situations like this.

Just start doing!
Go out for a run/swim, gym-session, make a plan regarding skills-improvement, and identify the first step.

@Heisenberdy

1y↑369

I went through several break ups in my life. Never did i ever get stuck in the pain and grief for more than a week or two. But then with my most recent break up, something happened.

I wasn't able to bounce back. And i couldn't figure out why. Besides the fact that it was the greatest love i had ever gotten to experience.

And then after months of being absolutely miserable, i finally figured out why this one was different.

It was the first time i went through a break up where we both still loved eachother as much as we ever did. With previous break ups, either me or the girl stopped loving the other person. It makes it easier to accept. Because what are you going to do about the loss of someone's love for another? Nothing.

But this one kept bringing my mind to the past. All the 'what if's' broke me for months on end.

Anyone who ever goes through a break up where the love was still intact, i wish you all the strength you need. Because it's something else.

@yajtramer6913

1y↑6

That has been my life also my friend
It's so hard to live like this.
I'm 57 and had that happen to me since I was 22. Every woman has cheated on me. My only crime is working to pay for living a good life. Nice cars, nice house.
They always cheat with losers in life. Drug addicts, alcoholics, abusive people.
🦨💩🦨💩🦨💩🦨💩🦨💩🦨💩
Good guys do finish last.
I should be out there raping and murdering women.
I would get treated with more love.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

All comments from YouTube:

@serbal4747

46w↑10.9K

I lost my relationship of 6 years yesterday. Sending my love to everyone else going through the same thing. We will get through it and come out of the other side stronger. One love❤️
(Edit): Thank you so much for everyone's care. For anyone asking, I'm much better; I was denied the closure I wanted but life isn't perfect. Still wishing everyone the best that is going through something, people love you more than you think and you'll make it to a better place :)

@beckyjonah1703

46w↑184

Srry dear my relationship of almost 2yrs just ended yesterday I didn't know I was dating a narcissist 😥😥😥😥

@serbal4747

46w↑72

@@beckyjonah1703 ahh I'm sorry too. The good thing is we are already healing! Sending you my blessings

@beckyjonah1703

45w↑12

Ammmmenn tnks dear

@salutoitoi

45w↑44

Sorry to hear that, it must be really difficult right now, you know that things will get better with time but for now allow yourself to settle down, cry, and eat some chocolate. Take care of yourself ❤

@larskaldenbach4233

45w↑111

4 years thrown away for me this week, im devestated. Partially my own faults since it was my first relationship, but the thing i have most issues with is for me not getting a second chance to prove myself that i changed with most things. We where living constantly together at our parents, but when we got our own house and moved in together it was to hard for my gf in combination with her stressful job.😢

554 More Replies...

@macdavy70

1y↑10.7K

I've had 3 bad break ups in my life, they progressively got easier, I've learnt to separate the fantasy of that person attached to me and the actual reality of that person, i cant control them. My therapy is self improvement.

@sister2mysoul

1y↑163

My therapy is self-improvement too!! Feel the feels and heal. 🤞🏽❤️🙏🏽💫🫶🏾

@FoxxyBoiJohno

1y↑41

I'm with you man.

@alamyr4540

1y↑51

Thank you for sharing. This helped.

@raymondotoole2600

1y↑28

That’s literally it 👌🏼

@opa8928

1y↑10

only 3 of them:) No, they are never easy.

167 More Replies...

@brandoncarter2708

33w↑2.3K

I did something the other day that really helped my anxiety with a potential relationship that wasn’t working out. I sat in my room, alone, and said out loud “Can you control how the other person feels? No, so don’t worry about it. You know this person is not right for you. Quit letting them control your emotions. You are so much more than one potential relationship.”

@natashachisenga9524

29w↑43

This is the best way to heal

@Cori86

25w↑16

God bless you ❤
I can't even last long in a relationship because of my past. If my partner does anything to me, even the slightest... I disappear

@trevonrichardson4786

24w↑5

I needed this! Thank you!

@hannahedwards4330

24w↑37

I broke up with someone for this same reason today, I felt like I was losing myself seeing the potential in him and the relationship. Great guy, we just aren’t right for each other sadly, it took me a year to accept that bc I love him so much and we had great chemistry. But chemistry can’t make up for everything, the differences we do have our quite important ones. So sad to see it end…but it’s the best for both of us as individuals. Maybe one day we’ll circle back to each other

@pikabobchupants

24w↑5

Needed this bro. Thank you.

29 More Replies...

@blase7733

35w↑620

Breakups used to bother me; then I realized, why would I want to be with someone that didn’t want to be with me. Now, I view it as an opportunity.

@user-bm6ex5zj6n

16w↑10

This helped

@JoseMora-wc5zz

14w↑8

That’s a good way to look at it, for someone that has no blood sweat and tears in the years. For someone that doesn’t feel the weight of the decades. This is a good way to look at it for someone that can’t understand what true love is. When you’ve put in much, to realize years later you’ve been cheated. For years.

@MichaelsPaintingChannel

13w↑9

That way of looking at it saved me once.. There are also questions like: did we really fit that good together....

@kingbaby8761

11w↑6

I used to be hurt by breakups. Then I stopped caring enough about people to be in relationships. I can interact with someone for 2 minutes and tell whether or not they are garbage, now. It's a wonderful gift.

@PowerOfQwerty

11w↑1

Dang Strike!

7 More Replies...

@nicholasferrara4327

46w↑3.8K

It’s hard to suddenly stop talking to someone, especially if you talked to them every day. Another hurtful thing is when you not only lose them, you lose their friends who had become your friends and not seeing their family again.

@elwinjohnson4004

45w↑228

That shit hursts cause my people loved her and her people loved me

@boy_087

42w↑17

@@elwinjohnson4004same here ☹️

@darkexe867

42w↑6

@@elwinjohnson4004same

@Sueko2009

41w↑35

Yes that's true, its so hard, you lose a lot people that was inside that circle. I have a friend of my ex who has kids, she always calls me to see them, they miss me... but i dont feel the same energy to go to her, because what made go to them was her, my ex.

@logan-llc

40w↑21

Do you ever truly love or do you get accustomed?? People come in and out of your life. A break up shouldn’t be any different.

46 More Replies...

@HunnyBee23

1y↑1.8K

DO NOT get into another relationship in order to prevent yourself from mourning the last one. Feel the grief. Mourn your loss. Get yourself up and running as a single person and THEN you can start looking. Especially if you are a codependent person.

@NoahS4226

1y↑71

Needed this reminder. Just got out of a relationship and really hurting right now

@386joedaddy

1y↑24

I tried to use sex and it just ruined it and masterbating as well. Its been two years and i did everything to get back to 100% and it hurts to smile.

@iHopBathroom

@@386joedaddy you know you’re sad when you don’t even want to masturbate man. Fuck. I’m proud of myself for being able to diagnose my feelings and what they mean though. I’m stronger than she will ever be. Nothing she can do can hurt me anymore

@diveshpote2669

1y↑13

@@386joedaddy Have control over thoughts action and reactions, it'll save you

@Skeeeeeyeeeeeeee

1y↑2

@@NoahS4226 same smh

47 More Replies...

@QrangesYT

20w↑878

I just lost my 4 year relationship today at 5:37pm. I don’t know how to feel, my mind is racing and I can not sleep. I hope whoever is going through this keep your head up.

@akankshasuman7438

20w↑38

Everything will be okay just breathe and focus on you.

@tejaswinimallick48

20w↑32

Yea everything's gonna be okay . Cry as much as you can , grief and heal that's the only way to cope up. My 4 yr relationship got ruined as my ex chose another girl over me. And I'm shattered and I'm healing I wish you would also heal completely and be happy again.

@ElBurroLolo

20w↑14

Keep your head up, lost my 2 year relationship like a month ago, started drinking heavily and got a dui, I really wanted to get her back because she was a really good girl but I have fucked everything up now. You are not alone brother, focus on yourself, go outside, go on runs, get that dopamine up and work out. ❤

@hollyfreeman2117

20w↑14

I know it may seem like your entire world is dying but time will heal you!! I went from sobbing and screaming every night for two weeks and slowly got better. Two months now and I feel SO much better. And you will too! Don’t give up or give in. Time WILL heal💪🏻

@micahrutland9021

19w↑7

I lost my relationship at that Same time of the day on Dec. 5. It hurts, but I'm always hurting my whole life, so used to it.

44 More Replies...

@pecansandies9521

22w↑253

They lost someone who loved them. I didn't. That quote has kept me going for 8 months after a 6 year relationship from 18-25

@micahrutland9021

19w↑5

That's a great quote. Thanks.

@bobdud3176

17w↑10

Hurts the most realising, they didn’t loved you…

@user-bm6ex5zj6n

16w

How are you doing noe

@sethtenrec

14w↑1

Great quote. Thank you!!!

@Impaled_Onion-thatsmine

13w

Oh yeah that emergence on heroin and what I had to do to reverse it someone convinces them they needed to take it when you shouldn't have to this girl had been the same thing as my cheap mattress - I even tried to throw it in the dumpster but my uncle retrieved it - so for a year even more, without knowing who they were, losing my mind during a critical study on philosophy of the mind then we traced it back and found out with antipsychotics removed her child and family out of her life and made it even worse and dumped her in some shithole. The most insane experience ever and they just don't care.

2 More Replies...

@LeNguyen-fk6xl

1y↑4.9K

gf of 8 years left me because she suddenly decided starting a family wasnt in the cards for her. I literally felt as though I was mourning the death of a loved one and in a way I did. I mourned the person I thought she was and the person I thought was the one for me. Hang tight and stay strong fellas. Get out and make as many friends as possible.

@Brian-xi1yn

1y↑259

Same thing just happened to me man. We were together 6 years then she decided she wants a different type of life. It's all good tho. Life goes on. It's taught me to not put all my eggs in one basket. For 6 years i only focused on making sure my relationship was functioning optimally and that she was happy as posible when really I should have also been focused on myself and my happiness. Thankful that I can take some time to focus on myself now.

@marcusb553

1y↑257

@@Brian-xi1yn same here brother. 6 years in, thousands of dollars spent, gave all the love and positivity I possibly could. What this video fails to mention is women initiate 80 to 90% of the breakups today. I had to slowly watch my once love of my life take the opinions of tik tok and her single partying friends from work more importantly than mine. It’s a sick and twisted culture these days but I have also learned to only focus on myself. Women come anyway whenever you have money and I’ll never let a woman dictate the course of my life again. Was a naive firm believer of “true love” and “soulmates” but now I see it was just a pipe dream. Men love the individual, women love the idea of the individual. I hope you choose wisely for your next girl like I will man. We need to start telling ourselves that we are the prize and acting that way, not vice versa. We are the ones who would put our life on the line to put food on the table and protect our family. Goodluck to you man.

@AngelMartinez-kj4dh

1y↑18

I’m really sorry man l, keep your head up king you’ll surpass it

@lav7161

1y↑127

@Marcus B Slow down their brotha. I, too, had a break up and immediately fell into the RP whirlpool. After having a break up of 8 years I turned to alcohol and bad RP advice. Let me tell you a secret, these RP dudes will never be in a GREAT relationship with sayings like "we are the prize." Focus on yourself first and what it really was that caused the break up. More importantly, ask yourself what YOU could have done better. It's easy to point the finger to avoid any type of responsibility. Now almost 5 years after a break up, I'm much better now. Accept women for what they are. Not every girl is a party girl. Not every girl will "initiate the break up". All these RP "facts" refer to women who are unstable. Find the good ones because they're out there. Unfortunately, the hotter they most likely the more options they have and the more men they've been with. Get real with yourself and stop following where dudes that have such a negative outlook on life. Just look at them now, complaining about women and having sex with women that anyone can have sex with. Is that the life that you want to live?

@thomasgrabowski2202

1y↑49

its worst when they tell you TOO your fae they want to spend the rest of their lives with you lol. never trust a women's words. Ever.

149 More Replies...

@philanthropicpaul4311

1y↑2.5K

I was supposed to get married last month. We were together for 3.5 years. She begged me to propose and I finally did. But two months before our wedding she told me she wasn't excited to marry me anymore. And just like that - the death of the dream of being her husband and of raising a family together died. It's truly mourning a person that is still alive. And it's disorienting that someone I would have died for yesterday isn't supposed to mean anything to me today.

@zachariahsmith6475

1y↑219

This is heartbreaking to read. You will find someone else but in the mean time I hope your healing process moves smoothly and quickly.

@joswinnoronha1739

1y↑78

My sincere prayers for you brother

@nickegofficial

1y↑108

We're watching this video together for a reason. Going through it with you. Mourning someone that's still alive, very well put. I've had like 5 girlfriends in my life, but this was the only one I truly wanted. Was planning to propose and just like that, she's gone. Stay strong brother.

@jbri1

1y↑22

Definitely. It's mourning the end of/death of something and those plans attached to them

@tomdannyhoff1

1y↑109

You dodged a bullet chief

122 More Replies...

@RenataCassari

34w↑1K

I’m reading your breaking up stories for almost an hour 😅 I’ve been single for 5 years but my last relationship in 2019 was devastating. I had a severe depression but now here I am, reading your stories. There’s no pain that lasts forever. Better days are coming ❤ wishing you all love and happiness. Hugs from Brazil 🇧🇷

@vijays6035

34w↑4

Thank you so much for your words

@madnalab3901

33w

I'm single would you like to get to know each other....:))

@LincolnClay98

30w↑12

That's 4 years

@ahey8548

30w↑4

@@Bahsvsvsplease make sure that this time around you love yourself sooooo fully and don’t lose yourself while investing in them. You deserve to happy without someone who was able to go without you as well. Please be careful with your own heart.

@ahey8548

30w↑5

I can relate to this. My ex and I suddenly parted ways in 2019 and I still think of her a more often than I wish. I still miss what I thought we had and it’s affected my ability to fully trust the presence of those I allow in my life. But I wish us both peace and more love than we could ever imagine.

32 More Replies...

@deeprollingriver52

36w↑2.2K

To those who are going through this tough time. I’m a 69 year old woman. I’ve had so many lovers who came and left. You never get used to the pain. It’s always painful. But this is the time when you can slow down, grieve, look into yourself and find that God is there to pick you up. I hope each of you find peace.❤

@OSKIERUSSELL

35w↑22

Nice

@madisampi2770

34w↑5

"so many lovers", ha ha ,the reason why they come and go , im sure many likes you got, are from women😁

@sallywangari3180

34w↑15

You are heaven sent

@deeprollingriver52

34w↑5

@@madisampi2770 pretty funny. But your comment is right on……

@marciasloan534

33w↑8

What a wonderful,generous person you are❤

31 More Replies...

@WISEGUYSOCIETY

1y↑3.6K

For anyone who is feeling overwhelmed by their current circumstances, this message is dedicated to you. Tough times never last, but tough people do. You've got this. Keep fighting and don't give up. 🙏🏼🤲

@mrgermanungeidoppelziregle3766

1y↑25

I really needed to read this. Thank you, kind stranger! <3

@djgesus

1y↑4

Thank you

@JorgeMartinez-rg2gv

1y↑6

Thank you 😔

@Lavender-qe2xx

1y↑5

Thank you. 💔

@katemanhica2877

1y↑2

I needed this. Thank you!! 🙏🏾

46 More Replies...

@12jacobmar

1y↑1.1K

My girlfriend of 3 years left me and I went full Forrest Gump. I just started walking, the 3rd or 4th day after the break up I walked 10 miles. I just got out and hit the nearest trail everyday. It was my safety net. A way to free myself from my phone and really put my mind into a better place.

@brebri1

1y↑104

man I'm having one of the most horrible days of my life, and you made me burst out laughing with the forest gump stuff. Thank you so much haha.

@Alex-gb7sm

1y↑17

Love this bro. I've been going to the gym regularly. Also been doing the infared sauna a few times a week which has really helped but running and/or hiking is something I've wanted to add but have kept putting it off. But the old dating gotta walk before you can run comes to mind so after reading this I'm going to get out there and Forest Gump it as well. Love that. 🙌

@thejtizzel

1y↑23

Hah, I did the same. Just fucking walked man.

@jdawg3629

1y↑9

But Forrest was runnningggg

@12jacobmar

1y↑6

@jdawg3629 indeed he was but we all gotta start somewhere. 😅

17 More Replies...

@Marvin-fz6pu

14w↑56

"We both lost something. You lost me and I lost time" - This is the one thing that keeps me going after the end of a 3 year relationship. It;s been 11 months now and I am still healing.

@johnnylongshlong3677

Hey Marvin... it's time to forgive my brother. You won't fully heal unless you get down on your knees and close your eyes, allow yourself to feel, and whisper into your pain "I forgive you (add her name here)". Keep doing it every day until the chains break. God bless you man.

@coxout3541

35w↑438

It’s a very tough business when someone leaves you and you’d do anything to get them back, all you want is to feel normal again, to share your thoughts and memories with this one person who means everything to you at that time. Such a desperately lonely experience it can be.

So many places remind you of them, so many songs make you think of them, it just runs through your mind constantly, while you wonder what you could have done differently to avoid this happening. You can’t stop checking your phone in the feint hope that they’ve started to miss you back.

The only advice I could give, is, if you’ve got a free day don’t stay at home, just turn your phone off and put it in a drawer, put a bottle of water in a back pack and head out. Spend the whole day out walking, Just keep walking mile after mile if you can, don’t return home until it’s getting dark and the day is winding down. Once home have a shower and something to eat, lay your exhausted body down,, maybe start a new series on tv, and don’t go near that drawer for a couple of days.

It’s not much but it’s a start.

@treypratt7302

35w↑9

Thank you. This really helped

@serumser1

33w↑7

Great advice! Stay strong! Have a nice day :)

@aaron1708

30w↑27

Man, this thing with music related is definitely despairing. I’m an avid musician, and after breakup I still having trouble to listen to songs I used to listen normally before. It’s been almost 2 months, but sometimes getting through some music can be so painful as a stab in the heart 🥹

@phumelelencube6909

28w↑4

I’ve been doing this only put on my fone to watch few motivational videos and td jakes sermons den I switch it off wen I’m done I take no calls I call nobody

@marysolplaysguitar9071

26w↑4

@@aaron1708 same, the first two days I couldn’t listen to any music at all (no matter which song) and I’ve never had that before. I usually listen to it daily. But after a week it got better and after 2 weeks I was enjoying music again. Just some songs make me cry or hurt physically now. (>1 month after)

11 More Replies...

@johnmoore1495

1y↑3.8K

For my fellow men out there, don’t hold back crying after a breakup. No point in holding it back when you’re by yourself, you’re just delaying the process of recovery and feeling better in the long run.

@gurayyildiz475

1y↑40

Horrible advice. Yes you might feel lonely you might be upset but don't cry. Crying doesn't bring them back nor does it make you feel better. Instead realise why it's happened. Were you at fault if so how can you improve. If they were at fault what did they do and what were the signs of it happening. If your emotional and can't think spend time with loved ones being friends and family. Let them know what happened and let them make you feel stronger. This is where you gotta chose who's in your life and chose well. Good friends and family will help you no matter what without you asking.

@gurayyildiz475

1y↑40

I'll also add to this, as a male focus on work focus on workout. Have hobbies and and use them at times likes this. Be upset but be strong. If they are not meant to be in your life that's it. If you break up once don't ever return

@Pytliczello

1y↑348

@@gurayyildiz475 what is wrong with crying? It doesn't bring them back but it definetly make you feel better after all. Nobody is telling you to cry in front of other people. Don't try to solve an emotional problem which is pain after break up with logical solutions and rationalizations.

@gurayyildiz475

1y↑12

@@Pytliczello but why are you crying. Cry when someone you love dies you can never see them again. Why would you cry cos some girl left you. She doesn't love you yet you are crying behind her. No wonder she left

@Pytliczello

1y↑213

@@gurayyildiz475 logic again. This is a thing we can learn from women. As AH said they move on better and quicker. Embrace feeling, release it and after that think logically what to do now

216 More Replies...

@ATLBraves1992

1y↑1.5K

Got broken up over a text message and blocked immediately after a 6 year relationship. It felt like I suffered from PTSD like symptoms where I didn’t trust anyone, cried a lot, was angry, was bitter for awhile (still go thru bouts of it, but much much less frequently). This video is spot on. I thought this was the girl I was going to marry and was 28 years old when it happened so my world from 22-28 felt like it was wasted, but I had to take it as a learning experience and only time and talking about it healed me and I still feel like I’m 90% healed. This video is spot on. I felt like my future was gone, I didn’t sleep for a couple days, would wake up in the middle of the night angry and stuck in my head for months afterwards, etc.

I saw 0 signs of it coming was probably the hardest part. It’s like getting punched in the face blindsided. She didn’t even have the guts to do it in person which I thought showed how truly weak she was and how I’m better off without her.

@antoniovillagomez6352

1y↑74

Bro, I had a similar experience with my ex. If she didn't value you, then it's her loss. You owe it to yourself to take time to heal and work on yourself. That way, you will benefit and when you find someone else she will be 10x better than your ex.

@yasserdehiles9425

1y↑55

Hey man, i feel like i can relate to you. My breakup today wasn't exactly the same, i'm 22 years old and we've been dating for 4 years, the breakup was normal and healthy but it was still unexpected and i didn't see it coming because a month ago, we were all lovey dovey, i'm ashamed to admit that it's mostly my fault, i kept ruining things and long story short, she reached her breaking point after too long, she said she lost feelings and breaking up was the only solution as she did not want to be around me anymore. I still can't accept it, and it feels really weird honestly, it's like i wanna move on because it hurts but i also don't wanna move on because i don't want to lose those 4 years of my life just like that

@younglionpops

1y↑61

@@yasserdehiles9425 doubt it was mostly your fault or that u ruined it, most likely she is interested in someone else, if not already bangin him. Women are ruthless, take note of that and care less in a relationship.

@ahmedmediouni6942

1y↑3

same situation, how did you deal with knowing you spent your twenties and now you are kinda old for dating again

@ATLBraves1992

1y↑8

@@ahmedmediouni6942 Yep. Only time can heal I think. Gone on few dates since and that helps, but nothing resembling a 6 year relationship has stuck. At times, my decision.

104 More Replies...

@BeBetterTips

30w↑128

I’m 30 years old and just got out of a 15 year relationship. Not really sure what to do with myself, but somethings telling me to become the best possible version of myself.

@firmanimad

15w↑5

That's great and all, but also don't forget to let yourself to feel grieve. Take the time to process it internally, and not just distract yourself with other stuff. Self improvement or not. At least, that worked for me. Half your life is a lot. I broke up after 5 years and I felt in limbo for a while.

@goodlife5825

13w↑9

19 year relationship came to a halt about a month ago, she tells me she needs space and broke up with me. She is my high-school sweetheart she is my world, I'm 35 and I dont know what to do

@zed3063

13w↑1

How are you feeling?

@goodlife5825

13w

@@zed3063 I'm full of regret and I'm drowning. My own soul hates me and the walls are closing in on me. That's how I feel right now

@goodlife5825

12w↑2

@@kkdream99 yeah, tell me about it. It's scary knowing you have to invest your time and energy into someone new and risk it all happening all over again. ... but hey who knows, maybe things work themselves out between you and your now ex

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@ELSATAYLOR-ze1dr

33w↑4.1K

Elowen Rasmusov's impact on the lives of those she's helped through breakups is a testament to her skill as a psychotherapist. She has truly made a positive difference.

@Notallowed101

32w↑38

Obvious Scam

@TheLaiRoU

31w↑19

What does she has to do with this video?

@alantelinen6309

1y↑849

To anyone who need to hear this, somewhere along the line it gets easier. If you can't eat, sleep or think of anything but that person, when there's a gnawing ball of snakes in your belly, me and many others have been there. It gets easier. Just let yourself experience the pain, don't run away from it and don't keep it inside. It is okay, even necessary to cry about it and let it go. Take it one day at a time, take care of yourself and best of luck from me!

@OriginalAse

47w↑3

Thank you❤ God bless you

@lucarimbau5998

46w↑11

This message made me feel better. I got broken up with two days ago and it had been so tough.

@alantelinen6309

46w↑11

@@lucarimbau5998 I am deeply sorry that you're going through this. Back when I wrote this comment, I was three months into a breakup. Now, almost half a year later I can say that it's monumentally easier. There is a future you that has gotten over this pain you are feeling, you just need to give it time. Take care of yourself!

@elwinjohnson4004

46w↑5

Got broke up with yesterday shit sucks

@alantelinen6309

46w↑7

@@elwinjohnson4004 it will get worse before it gets better my man. Hang in there!

40 More Replies...

@MikeCornwall

1y↑1.9K

First breakup I experienced rocked me. High school sweetheart, together for 4 years. Split during first year of college and it took me 3 years to fully get over. I think a large part of it is how new everything is early on. You’re doing many things for the first time and the relationship often ends up very intense, very passionate, very full on because you’ve never experienced anything like it nor have you gone through the trauma of something like that ending.

The lessons that you learn during that recovery period are crucial for healthy relationships moving forwards imo. It was one of the worst, most humbling times of my life but equally, a period that I look back on with fondness for the amount I grew.

To young guys out there, it can hurt like hell. It’s supposed to. Use that time to reflect on mistakes made and grow from it. It takes time and experience to build something, the more you put into yourself the more you’ll get out of someone else.

@djdroogie

1y↑30

This is such a profound message. Thank you for sharing.

@Skama1975

1y↑2

True words!

@bradystroud1675

1y↑8

Wow man, thanks. That last line is fantastic, I'm stealing it!

@tooquick6

1y↑14

Same story with me man. Hardest thing I’ve been through in my life and that was many years ago. Hard events after that haven’t compared to that pain and sadness.

@Skama1975

1y↑12

@Lukas Bleichner my gf from high school cheated on me (we were apart in different cities) and she decided to stay with the other guys. Fast forward after 25 years, her family life is totally a mess, she got married, has 2 boys, she divorced again. Sometimes a break up is a blessing in disguise.

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@CapoKitten

27w↑64

My bf broke up with me yesterday, heres some advice. My bf broke up with me and didn't even cry or feel any remorse. Yesterday, after 20 minutes of crying I finally had come to the realization. If they don't feel any remorse about breaking up with you, that is proof that they weren't the one. And that if they don't care about you in the relationship, they won't when or after you break up.

Keep your chin up, and just know that things will get better. Don't be sad that it ended, be happy it happened. Cherish those memories while still understanding that they weren't the one, but you will find the person that aligns best, it just takes time. Keep safe yall. ❤

@Catscalligraphy

10w↑2

It could very well mean he’s dismissive avoidant and exited the relationship long before he let you know about it. My DA ex boyfriend did the same thing.

@thefulcrum

8w↑1

Sorry to hear, Capo! Also, "the one" is a bit of a fairy tale that society sells us.

It's an awful lot of responsibility to place on one person.

Not necessarily saying we all need to be polyamorous.

But perhaps we can see a community of people that we can serve and that can serve our needs.

@CapoKitten

@@thefulcrum Now that I read over my comment again I realise I said that and I feel so stupid 😭 Thank you for the info, and I completely agree!

@jwebbfs_ak1434

19w↑97

I’m convinced heartbreak is the worst pain you can experience. Similar to grief for sure. I was depressed for 2 and a half years, every moment of every single day when I was awake thinking of them and feeling like I wanted to die. Never thought it could ever get better. It’s been 12 years now and I still think about her, but it took two and a half years for me to finally wake up one morning and she wasn’t the first thing I thought of, and I could enjoy other things in life going on. It’s incredibly painful and difficult, but it will get better. You just have to diligently suffer through the hell, there is light at the end of the tunnel even if you can’t see it yet.

@expectingthebeach2368

8w↑1

thank you for these words, it's so hard to live in this pain 😔😪

@fabi.6080

7w↑2

12 years??? if i think of her for 12 years that would kill me. I wish i could just forget

@jwebbfs_ak1434

7w↑1

@@fabi.6080 Yeah I still think about her, but not actively. And when I do it no longer is painful. You just have to go through that hell to finally get to that place where the pain has scarred over

@fabi.6080

@@jwebbfs_ak1434 I‘m feeling like I have quite a few fun months of pain ahead of me, can’t wait :‘)

@fabi.6080

@@jwebbfs_ak1434 can’t wait to get to that place where it‘s no longer painful. the thought of her being happy with someone els though is actively killing me

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@4EverNanes

1y↑790

I can deal with breakups. I have a tough skin. But what really broke me was my last gf. My soulmate. She ended her life and that i just cant seem to get over. That loss the thoughts of what i could have done better. The realization that she put on a smile for the world when she was truly hurting on the inside. That broke me. I cant seem to overcome this pain. I do not wish this on my worst of enemies. R.I.P. Nanes you will be forever missed and never forgotten. 😢

@kateyepawtch

1y↑69

man I'm so sorry for your loss

@KDFOXSCI

1y↑26

Sorry for your loss! She will watch over you. 🙏🏼

@ElfPk3r

1y↑30

I also lost my first love and would be fiance to suicide last year. March 2 is approaching quick and I still cannot get rid of the feeling of guilt and all the “what if”s :)
Sorry for your loss brother.

@johnlevis3648

1y↑16

You made your account 9 years ago with that username. Has it really been that long since you lost your girl? I really hope you keep her in your heart as a guardian angel but in a healthy way, and move on. Hope you're doing better

@williamdavis-fb2hk

1y↑7

Don’t beat yourself up man. Look at everything you have been through and you are still standing strong. The Lord works in mysterious ways, but life can feel so cold and isolated at times. Just know you are loved brotha, we are all cut from the same cloth. Nothing can change what has happened, but you can be the impact on each and every person you meet. Spread the love and positivity and the light will shine pure through everyone around you. I have faith in you. Sending love and prayers.

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@naterksmr

51w↑495

"Allow yourself to feel the feelings" is one of the best pieces of advice I was lucky enough to hear from a good friend of mine after my first breakup. If you want to scream, then scream. If you need to cry into your pillow, cry into your pillow. One of the worst things you can do is have the urge to experience a feeling and tell yourself you need to suck it up and not feel that feeling. It's easy to tell yourself "No, it's been two weeks since the breakup, I need to be over them and move on." Take. As. Much. Time. As. You. Need.

@user-uc9pd3vq5g

38w↑11

but time seems to move so slow if you're in pain right?

@picies2020

38w↑6

Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I close my eyes, take a few deep breaths, and repeat the phrase "calm down, think." it has helped me gain some control back when it felt I had none.

@JustMalcolm914

36w↑3

Good thing is I don't have that type of time anymore. At one point I wasted several months to get over one person I can't do that again

@sabrinafairchild1058

35w↑1

That's what I'm telling myself now. I never really did that. Feel it and go through it.

@RenataCassari

34w↑5

It took me 9 months crying 😅 but nowadays I don’t even remember he exists

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@RI_KI_TA

23w↑52

Breakup hits hard when you realise you were the one who pushed it too far for it to fall and see it sink.

@allgtg3

16w↑7

Accountability is big in this arena. A lot of breakup stories you hear have more to the story than what is being shared. For me personally I can think back to failed relationships and see where I went wrong even if I felt it unjustified at the time. People tend to point the finger instead of doing an internal investigation. For instance, I had problems with showing emotion consistently and had temper issues that fueled breakups. It wasn’t the main cause but it certainly contributed to the fall out. Looking at it from this perspective has helped shaped me into a secure man. We must hold ourselves accountable.

@kevindodgersguerra2927

10w

😢 happened to me

@nteihwang6451

10w↑1

Without knowing from the other end, pushed it too hard with full trust, and later get hurt so bad, the trauma is so painful, there is no medicine for that the worst part

@Samagoselen

9w↑1

I agree with you 100%. I Had found the love of my life, we were together for 9 years. But because of my mental state and all the mistakes i made, i lost her. I knew that that's gonna happen, but i kinda wanted to destroy myself at the time. And what can i say, i did. Now it's been little over 2 years since we broke up and i feel so much sadness, pain, such heavy regret, it's impossible to forgive myself. I was so stupid. I can't wrap my head around it, i don't know what happened to me. All i know is that i will never make the same mistakes ever again. This lesson is more than i needed. I wish everyone strenght and all the best! Hold on!

@expectingthebeach2368

@@Samagoselen i am struggling to accept the mistakes i made also. the heavy guilt, how to forgive this really hurts

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@Christina_320

25w↑125

My boyfriend and I broke up in May. I’ve been such a freaking mess. I constantly think of him day and night. We text here and there and I also had a relationship with his daughters and his parents and entire family. It’s been so devastating. How is it that two people can be so happy and so in love to acting like they don’t even know each other. Is beyond me. I hate this world sometimes. I hate that things are so hard and so broken. I pray things work out not only for me, but for everyone in here. 😔😞

@AuPairChina

22w↑15

“How is it that 2 people can be so happy and in love to acting like they don’t know each other”. That’s the bit I don’t get too. I feel like you’d have to be pretty cold hearted to act that way.

@christonacouch5550

21w↑4

Wow, my feelings exactly. 5 years with the love of my life, to her just suddenly ending things and not even being willing to have a conversation with me about it…literally was saying “I love you to me one week”, and within a couple weeks after getting a new place and a new job, wouldn’t even return a call or text to me. I love with my whole heart and she was the love of my life, but I honestly think some people are able to just use others or feign their love out of their own convenience and circumstances. I truly call that having sociopathic tendencies, and one of the only things I’m grateful for is letting it make me realize I could never treat or use another human being like that. How others do, is just simply beyond me. It’s been two months and every day I struggle to find happiness or feel like I will ever be able to love again. I hope you are doing well, and by the sounds of it let it be a reminder that YOU are a loving, honest, and genuine partner and person, and as a result you deserve a love more sincere than one that could just be written off and forgotten like that..

@soremstrauss4230

18w↑11

I learned that keeping in touch after a break up is the worst idea ever. It makes healing last longer. That is why cutting off contact is the only way even though it feels like you have to pretend you don't know each other anymore.

@purplehaze658

13w↑1

It’s hard to move on with the dreams and memories that still lingering on.

@saidissaad7231

13w↑3

You lose somebody cos God has better and more convenient person for you trust me😊

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@markmattson2138

1y↑697

Had a breakup last year. Easily the most painful event in my life by far. It’s been 8 months and it still hurts. But it’s the kick I needed to radically change my life for the better

@guillaumegillon1665

1y↑17

Same thing 3 years ago. Now with some hindsight I can tell it was for the best. It really changes me in a great way and gave me the opportunity to find myself and stop living in someone's shadow. Every event bring his positive side we just need to look at it and understand it.

@docd2295

1y↑9

Same thing man. But I still think I would want her back if she wanted me back. And it could in theory happen. How do you deal with that? Walking away from a good thing without fighting for it?

@randomben6828

1y↑6

@@docd2295 If you break up with someone, for whatever reason, its usually probably because she wasn't the one for you

@markmattson2138

1y↑8

@@docd2295 Depends on the situation. If you’re like me and everything seemed fine then she suddenly left you, you gotta remember how much pain she caused. She abandoned you, betrayed you, etc. But if you guys were a mutual break up or like an on/off thing, it would be different

@docd2295

@@markmattson2138 thanks for reply. It was a combo. One year relationship. Built on good foundation. But as things got more serious she got more nervous that she could not commit to marriage. She would go hot and cold and felt really bad about it. The breakup happened over a month as she dealt with her feelings about it and me. So I understand and agree with her decision given her feelings. But she didn’t leave because of a problem really. She just isn’t ready to get married yet and we have some differences. I personally have some problems I’m working on that I don’t think she understands how much they impacted the relationship. I was her first serious boyfriend. So basically, i think WHEN she is ready to marry (she wants to) it will be to a man very much like me. Why not me? I am open to finding someone else first but to me it’s just a timing and a small gap of personally growth thing for each of us in different ways. We both really wanted it to work and I was down to do that more but her feelings were all over the place. I believe a day will come when she wants to marry badly enough she will be willing to go through the work necessary. Right now it was too stressful for her. And that’s partly my fault. I’m kind of a lot in some good ways some bad. It’s why I think if I was more mature she might feel differently.

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@berniesilva8629

42w↑489

Been feeling the same way. Received a break up by text after a nine year relationship. I'm 73 and she was 8 years younger. Funny thing is we never argued. She just decided it's over. Devastating, heartbreak, loneliness, isolation feelings, all coming without me ever seeing it coming. Been 4 months now. Tough to move on. Always ruminating in your mind about it all. Good luck to all the broken hearts out there, these times are tough.

@healingheart3117

41w↑3

I have a lot of things going in my head and heart I want to talk to someone who can suggest me what is right and what is wrong so I won't regret later in my life....

@TamaraLeroy

41w↑2

Yes it's tough but all is all we have to move on regardless 😢.just experience it and to be honest am losing it

@TamaraLeroy

41w↑1

@@healingheart3117can we talk I also want to talk to someone

@healingheart3117

41w

@@TamaraLeroy yes life never goes as planned and that makes living a life is a hell

@healingheart3117

41w

@@TamaraLeroy yes I love to ...I know how hard it can be when you want to say what is going inside your head and the pain in your heart we just need someone that could listen to us and that's more than enough

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@ZvHeL

16w↑35

I lost my relationship of 4 years a few days ago. Already feels like weeks if not years without her. I wish everyone going through this hell a good luck, we can do it, we have to; for ourselves and our younger selves.

@duxmusonda

15w↑3

Same here…worst thing is I dream about her almost every single day…all the best it will work out in the end

@ZvHeL

15w

@@duxmusonda same here, i totally get you.. no matter what in the end it will be alright.. don't give up

@zp8362

13w↑3

Just had a dream about my ex from over a year ago last night and it produced a HUGE wave of emotions for which I was not prepared.

I reached out to her today to talk about us and apologize for what I did wrong, and found out she had a dream about me last night, too. I know she's seeing someone else and it's taking every ounce of good in me to just allow her to move on and try and move on myself and let her go, but I also really wanted to know if I'm at all redeemable and if I ever deserve to be loved again.

It's hellish right now, to say the least. Get distracted in work, exercise, a hobby, etc. would be my advice. If I didn't have to go to work today I would probably be at home crying my eyes out or drinking so much that I passed out so I could avoid the pain.

Hang in there, is basically all I can say. I'm trying, and I hope you are, too

@duxmusonda

13w↑1

@@zp8362 I know it’s easier said than done but try not to drink when you are in your emotions…try talking to someone about what you are feeling and going through

@ZvHeL

13w↑2

@zp8362 Thank you for your advice man.. I appreciate it, I am doing my best to hang on and move on.. I believe in you, I hope we will all be alright, we can get through this. We are all humans we all make mistakes most important part is to learn and move on even though it feels like hell right now..

Sending my support and bets regards to you, thank you

6 More Replies...

@clashofqueen93

36w↑98

Got broken up about a week ago. Then found out she found someone within that time span. I was devastated. Still am. I really can't wrap my head around the loss of it. She wasn't just my gf she was my best friend too. Hanging out everyday to not hearing anything from her is driving me thought process berserk. I want her to be happy I truly do, but idk how to deal with this loss. She's gone forever 💔.

@Snuggs420

36w↑19

Ugh I’m so sorry. It’s the worst pain…. betrayal plus loss of love and friendship…. My only advice is to let yourself release all the pain. Cry it all out, hard. Exercise to release the stress. And pray. Get spiritual. It will help. Peace to you!!!! Sending a hug

@theabandonedhunter3604

30w↑9

I’m feeling your pain right now. My partner of 11 years finished with me by text 2 days ago. I’m really struggling but I’m trying to be as strong as I can although have hit the booze. How are you getting on now brother??

@wisconsinfarmer4742

30w↑6

I got a lot of therapy while sleeping with intentional dreaming. I don't know what I dreamt but upon waking I would feel better a little bit every day. Now after 3 months the heartache is down 80%.
"I intend to have dream experiences designed by my spirit guide, that will put this relationship in a healthy perspective."

@arzumgulsar6951

29w↑13

It’s a rebound, the new partner is a bandaid. It won’t last, remember that!!

@arzumgulsar6951

29w↑1

@@mattthx50 lol we know how well those relationships go, don’t we 😂

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@Hanslouis97

40w↑556

I just had a breakup recently from a 1 year relationship. It was tough. I was in a codependent relationship. It was like a drug. After the breakup, I experienced withdrawal symptoms like I was an addict. I felt nauseous, anxious, depressed, chest pains, shortness of breath, and shaky. It has been 3 weeks, and what didn’t help is that the day I broke up my auntie died. So I was experiencing grief twofold.

I hope and pray everything goes well. But the process is tough. I cry everyday, and at work I cry in the bathroom because I get reminded of my ex from time to time. I hope I recover from this, I don’t know how long.

@gowsalyasrinivasagam1997

39w↑29

Hope you are doing well...sending love from India

@yoz5637

38w↑24

Reminder: You are super strong, I really mean it and you deserve way better. Healing takes time and if u feel its embarrassing, don't be ashamed of things, crying etc. You will get through within your pace and that's okay. Grief takes time and you're doing your best. Things will get better. From a stranger to another sending love ❤️

@eazy_bread5587

38w↑14

Just know you don’t ever have to feel alone . I feel this same exact way . Stay strong

@PsychoticLeprachaun

38w↑14

All things come to an end, including the pain you're going through at the moment. It's perfectly normal to cry and feel bad. Your whole mind needs time to adjust to these changes before you're ready to move on

@letsdothisasap

38w↑7

You have my support. Gong through a tough time too but it seems like yours is heavier than mine. U know in life u don't know what u r going through till u see sm1 going through more. And I'm sure sm1 is out there also in a situation worse than urs. The bottom line is to be strong, allow urself to hurt and heal with a scar. I say scar cos it won't fully go, but won't hurt as much over time

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@joannalisaa

39w↑136

I love this comment section. people really open up their stories that remind us of we're in this breakup phase together.

@Cmabry37

❤️❤️❤️💯✊🏾

@Axtro5

33w↑47

I’m looking up dealing with breakup stuff for a relationship that didn’t pass 12 months, I can’t imagine what people feel like that broke up from longer relationships or even marriages with kids that have to keep dealing with some of these exes from hell, I’m wishing all the best and healing fast to everyone, stay strong.

@g.a.d6988

27w↑9

Listen Energy is far more powerful than time. A 6 month relationship could have a heavier impact than one that lasted for years. Quality over Quantity. There is no minimum time qualification for attachments. Just know you aren't alone.

@alexanderavanth

24w↑29

Five years ago I woke up to the reality of having lost my partner, job and place to live. We had been together for 7 years. Looking back at my behavior I went manic. I left London to travel the world, seemingly super social, but I was deeply hurt. She had another and when I found out I was crushed. However I realize that it was not just loosing her that made me sad, it was that my whole concept of trust and love was turned on its head. You start questioning love in everything in your life. I had to learn how to love again - and I did learn, actually more authentic than ever. Today I am happily married and curious in my love to my wife and the world.

@afurinperil

1y↑1.4K

I'm going my first breakup at 30. I was with him for nearly 13 years. I don't really have friends or people to talk to about it and I haven't been able to pull myself together for months now and I feel my depression only getting worse. I've been to three different therapists now and I hated all of them and can't find the motivation to try another. I'm also unemployed. I'm a failed artist and I just can't pick myself up off the floor to get a day job. He was all I had. I've never been able to make strong friends. He was the only person I was ever able to get close to and I watched him slowly outgrow me, surround himself with friends and cheat on me with many of them. Between him, my bad history with friends, the therapists and some things my parents put me through, I don't trust anyone. I genuinely feel like my soul is dying and there's nowhere to turn and no one who cares.

@questionmark8046

1y↑227

Start with mindfulness. Every day for 10min in the morning and 10min in the evening. Feel what is happening in your body. Additionally, try to write down what gives you energy and try to dedicate your time to what gives you the energy. Write also down what drains your energy and stop doing it. I wish you all the best.

@jeffemmersonauthor

1y↑200

You aren't alone in this experience. ❤

@sparthacuster

1y↑83

You are not alone❤

@jacobcardona614

1y↑65

Things do get better in time I know you've been probably told that a lot but it's true I was with one woman my whole life since I was 16 years old we got married had two daughters and at age 37
she cheated on me and left me with the two kids to take care of it's been a year now and it's still hard but you just have to remember there's somebody out there for you and if that person was meant to be in your life they would have been just remember you're not alone and in time you'll be okay

@jeffemmersonauthor

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6GQEEF2kWY4

291 More Replies...

@alanmcdeed2795

1y↑383

She/He is not the source of your happiness, the source is within you. Reach out to it and self improve, if you are even willing to. Stay strong everyone!

@julieb8445

47w↑18

It still hurts. I understand what you say, but we are humans and here to love each other . Self love is amazing and healthy, but it still is heartbreaking experience because we are people with feelings and emotions. I wish people wouldn’t make this so black and white “just love yourself”.

@WorldravenNevar

36w

What about "they/them", you racist 🤪

@ogx_xpayne

35w↑2

@@julieb8445Its because you gave to become your greatest self. Can't be out here feeling sorry for ourselves.

@julieb8445

35w

@@ogx_xpayne true… have to keep moving forward

@Brinkburn_Gymnasium

24w↑41

I went through a rough break up. After years of toxicity I exited the relationship and took a ‘Cold Turkey’ approach. I felt the pain, let it in fully and I took a mental approach to the break up as though it was a challenge. I told myself it would make me a better person. After 2 months of intense pain I started to feel better. I didn’t blunt the pain, I didn’t drink, mess around with girls or try to make myself feel better. It was the best thing I could have done. It’s a shame that people won’t let themselves experience the pain and come back better and stronger. I’m not afraid to enter a relationship now, as I am so much better equipped but with that being said, I am very comfortable in my own skin, I’m my own space. I think every man should allow themselves to enter this place. Remember, if you don’t get over your last relationship, those problems will re-occur into new relationships.

@Deatonis

19w

To an extent I always think this mindset is silly. Because to truly love you give people the option of destroying you but trust them not to. What y'all always pine for is partnership not a real relationship I've even seen it in marriages it's like room mates instead of lovers it's a cycle of never truly forming a deep bone but being able to claim you do and happily moving onto thr next throw awayible relationship

@Brinkburn_Gymnasium

18w↑2

@@Deatonis I don’t fully understand your reply. I guess everyone has their own approach. All the best.

@nsideoutn8439

14w↑1

I am doing the same, for once in my life. I’m 41, and this time not drinking, working out hard, and not trying to date others right away. My ex had given me some bad vibes throughout our relationship was one of the reasons I broke up with her. Afterwords, she said some pretty nasty things to me and tried to sleep with my best friend. It hurts deeply. I never contacted her about it. Sometimes I still want to ask her wtf, why, how could you,… but I am just trying to move on. I don’t think I’ll get the closure I feel I need.
Would you contact her and try to see what she has to say about it? Oh just move on and let her be??

@Brinkburn_Gymnasium

14w

@@nsideoutn8439 you will never get clarity from a female even if you do ask. Trying to understand a woman is impossible, they don’t understand themselves! Move on, complete your mission. One day you will laugh about it. Stay strong.

@mast3rchief536

10w↑1

I really ruined an opportunity recently, I was so adamant about doing this exact approach but one night I got drunk and texted her, now it’s like we’re texting and it’s affecting me again. I really blew that window of opportunity.

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@fruits6529

33w↑481

Elowen Rasmusovs therapeutic approach is both nurturing and insightful, making her an ideal choice for anyone seeking guidance during a difficult breakup.

@verynearlypure

1y↑18

First loves are brutal. A decade later I still find myself going through the stages of grief. I truly wish it upon no one.

@saintmora

1y↑202

Each breakup I've had made the next one easier to deal with. It also made me more emotionally intelligent and prepared for the next one. I'm a believer that everything happens for a reason in this life - that thought alone has made it easier to move on and trust that life is putting you on the right path to finding the right one for you.

@jaybee4288

1y↑2

So why do people die sad and alone never meeting the one they’ve believed is coming?

@OriginalAse

47w↑1

@@jaybee4288perhaps they didn’t really try to look you know?

@pyros4333

38w↑3

@@jaybee4288 they never met reality and lived in their dream world of expectations so they held out forever

@junkyardhero5202

35w↑45

No matter what you can't control what other people do. Time changes everything in your life at some point right down to the person you know at the local store or restaurant. Literally nothing stays the same. So let people come and go freely. Pain is just part of the whole story.

@hananyusuf8649

24w↑1

Thank you for this 🥹🥹

@allgtg3

16w

Yep I highly recommend this thought process. But keep it productive. Don’t think about it as doom and gloom. Life is a journey. Some things you pick up along the way and they stay with you. Some things can’t come with you. Sometimes you lose things and find them later. Always make sure you are good first. On the surface it sounds selfish but if you put yourself first (after God of course) you will be in a much better position to care for others and be who they need you to be. If you’re focused too much on thing’s outside of your control ie. other people, you will only ever be as strong as the bond between the two of you.

@jmagana166

37w↑103

Watching my ex get married was a massive hit to my ego. And in reality that is all it was, me being rejected by being me…

@Inside_the_Male_Mind

24w↑2

What do you mean?😢

@K.Marx48

21w↑1

For me too, but you know what the sad part really is? She wasn't my ex lol. Nope, nothing, we were nothing, and I was no one for her. She just pulled me around like a rag doll fo a year or so and then just disappeared out of thin air. Yep. It happened to me cause I'm an idiot. I just wish I never met her.

@ralf4778

21w↑2

⁠@@K.Marx48same here man. 2 nights ago on the dot. Now I’m surfing YouTube watching videos like this feeling dumb, but in a way it’s alright to know there’s others feeling this same feeling. I just wish I got some closure y’know.. but not even that. It’s all good nothing we can do I guess.

@K.Marx48

21w↑1

@ralf4778 What do you mean for closure, did you confess your feelings? Cause I did, and well it was not worth it, at all. So don't feel bad about it. Yeah, who gives a shit anyway, I don't miss her I just wish I hadn't been so weak and stupid to let her drag me around for a year and then disappear.

@ralf4778

21w↑1

@@K.Marx48 nah I didn't confess anything, I wasn't able to say my peace. By closure I meant like I was basically "ghosted" or whatever so I never got any explanation as to why or how or when things went south. But like you said fuck it, things in the past should be left in the past. gotta move forward.. wish you the best bro.

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@lawrencelang

1y↑72

Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her

@lawrencelang

@@ronaldk.stroud how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

@lawrencelang

1y↑1

@@ronaldk.stroud Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

@MasteryOrder

I wish you strength and willpower to learn from your past and to move forward to a better future. Great relationships are built on trust, character and reciprocity. Embody that and expect similar traits in your future partner and you will have a chance at a life long relationship in which both of you will thrive.
If you enjoy topics about mastery and masculinity, I invite you to explore the videos on the Mastery Order Channel.
Challenge yourself with some ideas about manhood, explore your masculine potential to the maximum and become the kind of man you would look up to and respect.
We can only better ourselves together, as men among men, so I invite you to use what I share and, of course, share your own thoughts so that others can benefit from them as well.
All the best to you!

@-senpai14

1y↑2

My realationship ended today of 4 years reason was that I was doubting her to be spending more time with a certain friend of her it was online realtionship one day she lied to me about giving him her id of a game to play I got mad and didn’t talk her for 3 days had said some hurtful things as let’s be friends and many more to her in end she actually did break up with me and went to that friend of her for new realtionship I thought she will not do like that because I spend my 4 year and every effort on her but now I am nothing to her she is even ok being without me ;-;

@AlphaForexRobot

50w↑2

Yes that's normal. It's too early for you to forget about them. 1 month is like yesterday, it probably take you close to two years like myself. Never try to contact her ever again Because that will slow down the process of healing. Delete all her pics and videos, her number and unfollow her everywhere.

@michellemagyar5197

43w↑78

From experience, it always gets easier and it takes time which sucks. Be patient and as much as you want to do not look them up on social media. You'll just slow the process. Be ignorant! Let yourself feel everything in the beginning. Eventually you'll move onto acceptance. Then after awhile you'll move onto progress. After that you do you. It may take years but life brings a lot of unexpected surprises so keep your door open after you heal. You are worth it

@purohuntaa

43w↑1

thank you

@meditate-me

35w↑8

LOVE heals the heart and the fastest and best way of healing comes from loving yourself.

@scryne5578

35w

I love myself... Yet still I suffer from her not loving me anymore, like she forgot all our memories and promises

@pauloramirez8216

11w↑7

3 weeks today, my 10-year relationship ended. While I was on a hike, I stumbled upon my ex holding hands with another man.

I want to wish her the best. As for me, my self-healing journey has begun, and I need to love myself before I can love someone else.

@chrisfir

You will be ok my friend be kind to yourself 🤴

@KHkippen

1y↑312

High school sweetheart/husband/partner of 11 and a half years had an affair and never broke it off. I'm 30 and currently going through my first heartbreak and break up and trying to process it the correct way. Videos like this help.

Stay strong you guys 💕 I truly believe things will get better and that I'll somehow find better.

@nicholas7866

1y↑25

That’s horrible. I’m coming out of an 8 year relationship where my fiancée slept with a man at a party and broke up with me for him. 3 months later and I’m still experiencing so many conflicting emotions about her and the situation.

@didge6409

1y↑8

Ahhhh man that’s rough!.

@youtubewhenbored728

46w↑5

@@nicholas7866 idk what to do I’m scared

@charithperera6544

39w↑1

@@nicholas7866 hope you're doing better

@mishaw6132

39w↑2

❤❤❤

17 More Replies...

@bolo2393

1y↑70

Honestly it seems like accepting and dealing with the death of a loved one is easier than an out of the blue breakup with someone you are deeply in love with.
When someone dies it is almost never because they just don't love you anymore and believe they would be better off with someone else. And when someone dies (suicide not included) you don't have hope that maybe they "come to their senses" or "realize their mistake" and come back to you.

@beritabola7226

33w↑980

Elowen Rasmusov is a compassionate psychotherapist who has guided countless individuals through the challenging journey of a breakup, providing invaluable support along the way.

@Notallowed101

32w↑5

Obvious Scam

@allwynmasc1

32w↑4

@@Notallowed101I googled the name and there was only one result. Didn't open the website. I wonder what the scam is.

@thevishdoctor

32w

The scam is preying on people going through a difficult time by someone who's a second grade therapist and a Frist grade make-up seller.

@waqasaslam4744

33w↑1K

Elowen Rasmusovs ability to create a safe space for healing is remarkable. She has a gift for helping people rediscover their strength after a breakup.

@Notallowed101

32w↑12

Obvious Scam

@medallo143

29w↑12

Oh yeah. 1k likes and you said basically nothing. Seems legit.

@Godshonestruth

1y↑361

I gave my entire heart and life to a narcissist. Nothing hurts more than being thrown away like a piece of garbage. So hard to handle especially when you cant tell anyone out of embarrassment. I exercise like a beast. Thats my escape. Its made me stronger and maybe even a bit colder. Sad how bad people can ruin the hearts of others so no one else can ever have that degree of love. 😢. Life is cruel at times. I gave everything I had. To my breaking points.

@mixedboi

1y↑9

Me too bro. 7 years. And now I had a break up again, gave it all again lol.
It lasted 2.5 months though, but she was gorgeous, a bit crazy though.
I know that I'm not a Saint, but I have my consciousness clean, because I did what I could.

@Diamekod

1y↑4

Bro it's nothing to be embarrassed about. I used to also think this but then I thought to myself - I'm a muay thai fighter, get fucked up in the ring, earn a lot of money, live the way I want. I'm strong and there's nothing to be ashamed about feeling sad or betrayed. And when I talked to my friends they would always support me. It took so much baggage of my back. Just trust people and let it go man. All the best to you

@Godshonestruth

1y↑1

@@Diamekod hey man- thank you for this. Truly. Respect and blessings to you. Ossssssss

@Godshonestruth

@@Ruylopez778 respect brother. Thank u for taking YOUR time to share wisdom and kindness w a stranger

@VenomLikeDat

1y↑1

Thank you for sharing bro. I needed this.

40 More Replies...

@PeterKingSD

36w↑15

I've been thru numerous breakups over the years. I always try to remember that there's just no way of knowing when someone will "flip a switch" on you. I've learned to make it a clean break, move on as quickly as possible, try to focus on the good times I had with her and try to learn something from each experience. Still hurts, but not as bad and not as long.

@linata6112

1y↑139

I am 42 and for the first time in my life I allowed grief to take over emotionally after a significant breakup. I could never process grief after a breakup or even death of someone. I’d just do anything to escape..drink..work…focus on something else because it was just unbearable. This time I allowed myself to cry on the floor on more than one occasion. It was hell when I was feeling all those emotions but for the first time in my life I now feel profoundly alive. I still get sad as a result of that loss but I no longer have the need to escape the reality. I feel present and that’s incredibly empowering. I feel like I was born again. So if you’re going through something tough I can assure you that you’ve got this. Stop resisting and allow yourself to feel everything you need to feel. It’s tough but it’s worth it. Your career, goals, ambitions can wait. You’ll become 100 times stronger if you allow yourself to grieve and to heal.

@ruthchange8893

1y↑1

👏👏👏👏👏

@CursedWheelieBin

1y↑3

That’s the secret 😃. It’s like taking a cold shower and deciding to surrender to the discomfort vs trying to fight it.

Addressing your negative emotions is not romanticised as an ultra macho thing the same way training montages are though, so many guys don’t wanna hear that. They wanna David Goggins or Rocky Balboa their way out of it.

I’ve worked out since my teens (37 now) but it’s never meaningfully helped with breakups long-term.
We all know there are countless other benefits so I would mindlessly convince myself “this is gonna get me over this”
I was in denial. These unaddressed negative emotions would be waiting right around the corner. No amount of bench pressing can assuage that.
When we ignore these feelings and try to bury them they come back with a vengeance, usually when we’re at our most vulnerable.

@chrisphillips9800

This is sound advice.
I'm allowing myself the time to cry and grieve it, but it's almost a month later and I'm still surprised how how often I still want to cry. Now I'm in the anger and resentment stage of the grief. How long did it take your to get to this place of relief?

@ZS59Goat

1y↑223

personally i’ve found after the first break up it gets significantly easier. you realize your worth and what you bring to the table and value yourself. my first break up launched me into a state of mind that improved my work ethic and allowed me to have the opportunities that I do. anyone going through a break up, keep pushing. it does get better, despite what you currently think. time does heal, even though I wanted to bash my head into a wall when I heard that saying lol

@JokobZuma

1y↑3

Thank you Rock Lee

@holeymcsockpuppet

1y↑13

We need to support each other as men to take the path you are talking about. Most men blame themselves. They redefine themselves as failures rather than having worth.
Too many men are isolated now. No close friends. No fathers. Just work and video games with other guys around the world...and alcohol/weed.

Keep sharing your story. Help other guys.

@ZS59Goat

1y↑3

@@holeymcsockpuppet I’d agree, at first I thought of myself as a failure. I think that time of self loathing is needed for people to mature and grow, although it’s a dangerous place and easy to get stuck. I’m somewhat optimistic for the future that these expectations for men will become a bit more realistic, but until then we grind!

@marius5319

1y↑3

@@holeymcsockpuppet very true words. As a man, you feel like you need to get past all problems on your own, and even if you want to talk to someone, often there's nobody around to listen. It is so important to talk about a breakup, that's something I realized in the last few months. Broke up with my gf one month ago after 2y relationship, but things weren't going well for the last 4 months in total. Without my friends, it would have been way way harder. You got this kings👑

@joe-un1ky

Just going through my second real breakup and it is extremely hard, but the first one was IMPOSSIBLE. Hopefully number 3 will just be "hard".

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@rjnewton7325

27w↑103

My 5 year relationship just ended this weekend, I feel so upset and lost. We ended on good terms and plan on staying friends, but it honestly hurts a lot. This video helps though, thank you for posting this ❤️. This comment section makes me feel like I’m not alone, thank you to everybody here talking about their experiences. ❤️

@Death.is.our.Salvation

26w

Stay strong my friend. I know its very hard. Be brave for your self. Υou will get over it little by little and don't stress situations.

@ramachandrabhakta4200

25w↑12

Really sad to know that. And I totally understand how you must be going through. While I am nobody to give an advice here, I just want to ask you to think about moving on completely and not staying friends with your ex. I know it hurts to even imagine that this person who meant the world for you for 5 years (and possibly more), is now gone will never be available. But I believe it would be for the better of your future. Keeping in touch will always keep some strings attached to them and may prevent you from ever fully moving on. It's just my opinion. Ultimately it's choice on whether you want to keep this person near or not. Wishing you a speedy recovery and a happy future. ❤

@MerryMoss

25w↑3

Heyy, I had a 5 year relationship end in April this year. He and I are still good friends - which is the first time in my life that I've been able / wanting to stay friends with an ex. And I think it only works now because we both knew the relationship wasn't working out, we tried for several years to make it work, and neither of us wants to get back together. That, combined with a period of about 3 months of barely talking really helped us find ourselves again. ~ Choose whatever you truly think is best for you, and it's okay if it takes time. Just try to live for yourself and take care of yourself 💖

@zbigniewmazur819

24w↑1

don't stay strong, feel pain and cry - it will purify your mind.

@Jotun2279

23w↑5

@@MerryMoss Yes, when the feelings are mutual on breaking up it's easier to remain friends. My first serious relationship lasted a few years and we both knew it was coming to an end and we agreed to break up. We've remained friends ever since for 20+ years.

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@Thecockneytraveler

35w↑20

12 years married. Down the drain. She woke up and literally saw me as her enemy.

@JaysonHoang14

12w↑2

Sorry to hear man. The world is yours, don’t let opportunities slip

@richardrolson2713

10w↑1

Maybe she is having a midlife crises

@CarianneRHixson

1y↑131

My first big break up at 23 took so long to get over. It was grief. It felt like walking around with the ghost of someone in the palm of my hand. It didn’t help that she was a mutual friend. From that point on, every social interaction became unbearable. Knowing my ex could be w someone else created a constant feeling of paranoia. The relationship was toxic, abusive and bound for failure but at that age, many of us haven’t built our self worth enough. My drinking went from bad to worse. I became an alcoholic. Sat at a desk job 8 hours away in the same city as my ex with crippling anxiety I couldn’t escape my thoughts. But one day years later, it just got easier to breathe. I finally healed. Time is the greatest healer. Pretending I was ok, and dating people to make others think I was fine did not heal me; they made it worse. If you’re going through it, I promise it’ll get better. In fact, it’ll give you wisdom you didn’t imagine you’d have.

@modern362

47w↑4

25 male here my ex broke up with me 2 months ago and i feel the same way. She was my first girlfriend ever my first everything. We were planning on marrying, living together, have kids,etc im still friends with her social media and everything but i just cant stand the feeling of her being with someone else. She said she was ok she felt better because she is religious but im not. Im having high anxiety and waves of sadness every day while shes over their all fine.

@anandjoshua7904

41w↑2

@@modern362i can understand you but the best thing you can do is block her everywhere it's good for you and for her I know it's hard but trust me it is the only way to move on.

@mitsuninkhiangte5771

38w

@@anandjoshua7904no let him hurt but control your fukin mind bro nobody is gonna do it and if u ever get back like if u want attention from her she will never pay atttention to you girls are just born that way they will care less about you if u ever get back together so be tough don't rely on others be tough don't say it's hurt just fukin try it's easy and she will crave your attention act like you're over her there is no needy love and there is no real unconditional love she loves u for a reason so don't chase her the moment u stop chasing her is the moment she chases you keep that in mind btw all humans have been through breakups even your mom, dad has it doesn't kill you, it's part of life just accept it

@NFGU13188

1y↑96

Let it hurt, it’s suppose to. Embrace the feelings and learn to be alone. It’s been 2 years, still think about it but I have come to learn that I don’t miss the person, I miss the feeling of being able to be vulnerable to someone and having someone there. As bad as it hurts, DO NOT sit there and be sad. Go find a hobby, go work more, hit the gym, get a new routine. Put more time into yourself. As bad as I wish it didn’t go the way it did, I realized it had to happen for me to be where I am right now. If I was still with her I would not have the job I have now and I would not have made a huge transformation in the gym. Don’t let your emotions dictate you as a person. Time heals all, just keep going, I promise it gets better and you will attract better. Hit the GYM!!!

@gintonicx6

45w↑1

Yep, best advice 💯

@Hamzak786

43w↑2

Thanks man needed to hear this

@Sly8822

41w↑1

Thank you for sharing! I really needed this read.

@pyrrhicvictory6707

38w

Time heals all. Yeah right

@David.soares

36w↑7

I don't often comment on youtube, but I thought it was a very pertinent moment. I lost my father and he is still alive. I dealt with a father addicted to gambling for many years, to the point where I no longer had to worry because my family lost everything. I played soccer and listened to my own father putting me down psychologically, this at the age of 13, 14 and so on. I worked without pay for him almost until I was 30. When I was 27, I had the mental and physical strength to completely detach myself from the relationship I had with him. The trauma is so big that it influences a whole life. I am 31 and only three things make me overcome what is in my soul: my mother, nature and myself. In these very dark times we have to find a strength that is not found in psychologists, books, friends, God. A force that transports you to the good made only by you. Because no matter how much you tell about what you have been through, no one will really understand or bear the pain that has hit you. I wish a lot of strength and perseverance to all the people who feel devastated by trauma.

@patzeb21

36w↑58

My 4 year relationship just ended today. She told me we drifted apart, I wanted to pursue some things that she just didn't, and vice-versa. That she felt frustrated with the relationship. That for two years, we were together only out of habit. That I put in no effort. She was my first real relationship. And the first woman I ever truly loved. The only person I saw any future with. I am 28, so, not all is lost, but I feel lost, and confused. A huge part of my life is just gone. I feel empty. It's not that I didn't see it coming either, we've been declining for months, but for me, there were more important things to focus on at those moments, for my life. I guess, she was right to leave, as I did neglect her. But all those things I gave more importance to, were things I was trying to build for us... She got spent... And now, I have to start my life again, without her. I don't know how to do it.

@lexirelle

36w↑3

I'm so sorry. You will get out of this much stronger and able to find a better partner. The world we live in is a real love killer. But there are still loving souls out here.

@night7185

35w↑2

respect

@deportedsouls3165

34w↑4

@okas_art

34w

@@lexirelleit’s so hard to think I would want anyone else. He was there for my when my mother died. I’m only 17. He stuck around till yesterday. Four months of him helping me be able to be happy and normal and functioning. He’s leaving for four years to join the navy after he graduates. Five years. A part of me is crazy and I want to wait for him. But we’re talking about someone that rather pursue his own paths then be with me. I lost my two best friends in less then half a year. My biggest fear after my mom died was him leaving me. What am I still doing. Why can’t I see he’s left me already. Two heartbreaks and trauma all in one a one package deal. Why did I get delt such a crappy hand.

@ragingphoinix9144

34w

Me and my ex but only 11.5 years. He's an amazing human just not my human.

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@Heisenberdy

1y↑369

@untitled7855

1y↑55

im going through this right now. we both love each other but know we share different goals. its a reality i need to accept

@feliciajohn7660

52w↑10

Same here

@Heisenberdy

51w↑36

@@untitled7855 what helped me with the healing process was realizing that, yes it is in some ways a waste of true love.

But because i love her so deeply i want her to be happy at any cost necessary and she wants the same for me.

Staying together just for the love would've meant we held eachother back from the things we wanted to achieve in life. And grow old together while being bitter towards the world and eventually resenting eachother.

We both care enough about one another to not want that for eachother. Not for our own sake, because love makes you selfless like that, but for the sake of the other.

@sylwiaa9999

51w↑41

This is what I’m going through right now and the pain is so intense and unbearable at times. I literally feel like I’m dying and in a haze. We love eachother so much still, but knew we needed to do this in order to grow and flourish in the ways we both crave. My mind is constantly running with what ifs. Thank you for sharing, it feels nice to know I’m not alone in this 🤍

@Heisenberdy

50w↑14

@@sylwiaa9999 You're definitely not the only one but you will feel alone in this for quite some time. And that's completely ok.

It's been almost 8 months for me now, and even though i still love her, my mind isn't constantly on her anymore like it was the first 5-6 months. It will improve. First until the point that it becomes somewhat bearable all the way to the the point where it's all ok.

I'm still moving towards that last part myself too. But i'll get there and so will you. 😉

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@ronnieanderson8375

1y↑80

Two and a half years ago I went through a breakup with my high school sweetheart. She left me because we grew apart. I had bought an engagement ring and her parents even knew I was on the cusp of bending down on one knee and asking her to marry me. The day she left I felt like my world had fallen apart and my motivation for anything was just gone. She was so beautiful to me and I was so angry and frustrated that she had left. I kept asking myself where everything went wrong. Sometimes people grow out of love and it’s just the way it is. Looking back on it I’m glad it happened because I was able to find myself through consistent exercise and self love. Learn to love yourself. It takes time to get over it and to this day I sometimes get upset but I know I’m in a better position now and the one waiting for me will come. Build your kingdom and the rest will come. I promise.

@ayanchatterjee338

6w↑1

I will tel u.. IT TAKES COURAGE TO LOVE... KNOWING FULL WELL THERE IS A RISK OF LOSING IT... SO hats off that ur kind and brave... World needs more people like u

@ravirm2443

35w↑7

"Channel your emotions in a different path"
is the advice I say to myself when I am depressed or sad

@johnyoung3397

1y↑780

Dude soooo accurate. I was blindsided 4 years ago by a breakup with someone I really saw a future with. I knew immediately that chasing after her would only make me a joke and didn't even allow myself to reach out and ask her why. A few years ago I entered a new relationship with someone I feel more strongly about. Naturally I thought I was completely over the break up. I wouldn't think about my ex for ages. Finally, a few months ago she got married and I was a complete mess internally for weeks. There was noone I even felt I could talk about it with without giving them the false idea that things weren't good between me and my current girl-- I certainly couldnt talk to her about it. It was beyond confusing how I was suddenly so affected after being completely fine for years. I guess it was the lack of closure. This explanation checks out.

@a.meeeezy9576

1y↑58

You did good bud

@sdust251977

1y↑91

You dodged a bullet! It would've made you a joke. I've been trying to get over a breakup for two years now and have done pretty ridiculous things. I admire and wish to have your resolution to stay away. At the end, she didn't choose you, but you kept your dignity, and avoided to be driven by absurdity.

@benvergus1573

1y↑56

If you didnt even know why she broke up with you, she probably didnt care to give you closure. People like that you can probably be happy to have out of your life.

@CameronBarke

1y↑54

Damn man, you holding up okay still?

Im 2 years removed a relationship, and it still gets me every now and then - laying in bed at night I'll just feel awful and think about the thing, and the one person I want to talk to, is that person... but you cant do that. It's really weird.

But ya, how are you doing now?

@johnyoung3397

1y↑23

@@CameronBarke I'm good man, thanks for asking. The odd time I still think about it in the quieter moments, but nothing like I did. Then again I thought I was good before so what do I know? I just keep reminding myself that everytime I've ever felt terrible it's eventually stopped. Why would this or the next time be any different?

35 More Replies...

@simonl2142

1y↑131

"The best life lesson is a breakup"
Learning how to control and better yourself while you are at your weakest and to keep improving will make you a better version of yourself. Do things you like, go to the gym, get to know new people, go on new adventures.
To enjoy life the only one you need is yourself!

@caochibao8662

33w↑981

Elowen Rasmusovs impact on the lives of those shes helped through breakups is a testament to her skill as a psychotherapist. She has truly made a positive difference.

@Notallowed101

32w↑16

Obvious Scam

@adeshn11

23w↑4

My relationship of 8 years just ended. Everyone who is going through the same thing, I pray your heart heels faster and gets better. I know you feel you lost a home you used to go to always and now it isn’t there and you can’t go back. I’m sorry it happened to you, if you’re here i understand your heart aches more than you can express. But stay strong. You’re not alone, I hope you are at peace again soon.
❤

@rchi3906

1y↑61

Just like to say , if your going thru a break up , IT WILL GET BETTER , it ll take time , one day at a time , something better is going to come your way , I’ve been thru break ups that almost killed me , felt like I was going insane and physically dying but u have to go thru the feelings , work out , obsess on something and one day your brain and heart are going to click and you ll feel good again, just remember your not alone

@sbacgd0main1

Thank you

@vancedadder

Along with all the good things OP said above, it's very important to do all the things you did before that relationship: your hobbies, hanging out with friends, being close with your family, etc etc. Yes that relationship was a beautiful part of your life and it was exactly that, a PART of your life. So it's very important to ACCEPT that fact(it'll help you immensely in the long run) grieve away if you want for a while, be done with that and get back on the track(unless you want to pick up a new hobby/a pet/any new interesting work or venture; which might also prove to be useful)

@victorolagunju

trust me your brain and heart gonna click.

@rchi3906

Just wanted to add , I’m all about men empowerment , best revenge is living well , doesn’t mean u have to be ballin , just progressing positive , when u put down the bottle of whiskey and turn off Phill Collins , it’s will happen , at that point obsess on getting better , silent pursuit to better yourself and situation , small daily victories and I promise u good things will come your way in the natural timing of things , one day at a time , No Negative Self Talk , your mind starts poppin shyt , cut it off , eventually you ll develop positive neuro pathways and positivity will come natural

@decimusxi

1y↑95

It took me almost 5 years of my life to finally see a new perspective for myself after my highschool "sweetheart". After 4 years, my spirit can now consider opening it's doors again. I may not end up in a relationship with the lady I'm now interested, yet I can finally say "it's ok, my future doesn't have to end here" and finally at peace

@decimusxi

1y↑7

Good men reading this message, don't give up your spirit. Someday you are going to make it through just don't give up. The moment you give up on yourself, only you will be able to save yourself

@madrigaldevelopment438

1y↑5

@@decimusxi Appreciate the support brotha. Our future doesn't have to end here. This can be the beginning of a beautiful new journey. I find that I can be at peace with that.

@decimusxi

1y↑4

@@madrigaldevelopment438 Love your thinking, take care my man

@_cigwe_

33w↑14

It’s always a trip when you see someone explaining exactly why you’re feeling a certain way. One thing I feel I’ve learned about loss is nothing ever truly leaves us, but we learn to live with or without certain people. Definitely one of the most difficult things about life.

@Inside_the_Male_Mind

24w

True🙌

@Rajib317

36w↑10

Totally agree. It's essential to acknowledge the feelings and be gentle about it. Allow yourself to get broken into a million pieces and only then you'll be reshape into your true form.

@alnomind

1y↑284

after listening what he told us at the end of this video I got an epiphany.. maybe it is because of the loss of my Dad I always feel myself tired and exhausted.. I've never fully accepted the fact that he's gone.
I mean, I understand that, it's been 7 years since then, but there's a difference between knowing something and accepting it

@letsgofishingene

1y↑3

My condolences.

@jorgeanibal8834

1y↑11

Crazy concept to accept, because it makes no sense. How can somebody be, and then not be. I lost my dad too, i was 14. I’m still caught off guard at times where something triggers me and i can’t not cry, i’m a grown man of 33. I wonder if there’s aome truth in that for me too. Honor your dad with the way you live your life my man. I wish you all the bast, god bless.

@ShyMplsMale

1y↑10

I feel you big time. I lost my whole immediate family in 2022 - brother, mom, and dad. All at different times of the year. I had to quit my job to get my mom's place on the market and before winter hit. I spent 6-8 hours a day there for two months. Afterwards, I felt completely exhausted and feel like I'm always just so tired now. I used to be a very hard worker at my job and now I can't even imagine trying to go back right now. Money doesn't matter and so many things I used to care about in life don't matter. Such a weird feeling.

@hanswoast7

1y↑3

My tools for accepting and letting go people are journaling / writing and visualizing a kind of "hall of fame", where I can list off the good, the bad and the ugly about the relationship with that person. So I can separate positive and negative nostalgia and have a more differentiate look.

You are way stronger, than you think you are. Take care, mate.

@ShyMplsMale

1y↑1

@@PlaywithDaisy You're sweet. Thank you. And yes, I am. Helping other family members, like my grandma, get through it seems to take my mind off of things for a bit.

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@sweetgirl4u247

1y↑19

Break-ups are hard. No matter what the situation or circumstance is. The one thing that is important is acceptance. No matter what, there was a reason it ended. Keep your head up.

@R.O.T.C._SEEM

17w↑5

I know for me, the most perfect woman I've ever been with left me out of the blue. It completely shattered me to the core. 12 years later and it still hurts. The worst part is that she is a really great person to the point where it has to be my fault that we broke up but she wouldn't tell me why. Tried to get in contact with her 10 years later and she still won't talk. I often wish that i can go back in time to when she loved me. I would literally give up all my tomorrows just to spend 1 day of when she loved me.

@SirDimi69

21w↑11

My gf left me recently after more than 6 years. Going through hard times, but I'm having the best approach. I don't hide my emotions, I'm finding support in family and friends and soon I'm gonna get to the self care phase I hope. I know there are many people like me currently dealing with the same. Let's not lose hope, let's not abandon ourselves, let's look forward for the future eventually. Let's try to become better and stronger people! Sending love and support to anyone in this situation! <3

@Waywardx9

21w

All my Love to you brother. I went through awful suffering in a similar situation as you.. just keep in mind that if it's not meant to be it's not meant to to be. If you grow and get better from this experience you will be presented with a greater Love.

@DookLey

20w

It sounds to me that by allowing yourself to feel the emotions and connect with friends and family that you are already engaged in self care. Keep it up and you will feel the positive benefits! I just started a separation with my girlfriend of 8 years this weekend and exactly those actions have allowed me to come to terms with this and my last relationship.

@mrvocal21

1y↑63

Had a breakup last year. Ended a 2.5 year relationship. He had someone else three weeks after we separated. When I saw them together I nearly collapsed. Needless to say its been extremely difficult bouncing back. He sent me an email apologizing for he hurt he caused...but you know it is just what it is.

@adrenalineadrian4166

38w↑2

Did you reply to the email or in any way ?

@Roobixfacts

33w

@@adrenalineadrian4166 If you're truly curious, I advise sending a written letter if anything. It's easy to send an email and it may hurt if you don't hear back. A letter does wonders, from my experiences.

@no-name1025

1y↑61

what i learned from my experiences is to see the other person as someone who is not responsible for my happiness. so whatever happens in the relationships, it is not their jobs to makes me feel happy or secures. and definitely, focusing 100% on yourself, without making the relationships as the number one priority. i did cried a lot, but that's a way to makes me feel better afterward. it's only been 2 months but my heart is no longer aches like the first time. i hope y'all heal from the heartbreak, and know that things are getting better.

@nvsni

Same here!

@defacto2417

17w↑5

It means a lot to read all these comments, it makes me realize that im not alone.

@filmyoutube3295

33w↑1.1K

I cant thank Elowen Rasmusov enough for helping me navigate the emotional turmoil of my breakup. Her expertise and empathy were truly life-changing.

@Notallowed101

32w↑27

Obvious Scam

@TheLaiRoU

31w↑16

What does she has to do with this video?

@MaxLooseRoots

1y↑11

Lots of wisdom here. I healed more in 5 min of crying after my breakup than 3 months of not.

@alecedmisten6343

1y↑17

Lost someone after 5 years. My advice - face every emotion, cry your eyes out, and don’t run from the pain because it will catch you so face it head on and make the process as short as you can no matter how painful it is. I don’t have any regrets with how I reacted to it I’m proud of it actually.

@anonyme7739

33w↑481

Ive heard numerous success stories from friends who turned to Elowen Rasmusov for breakup counseling. Her reputation as a breakup specialist is well-deserved.

@farmstyle92macd55

35w↑10

31 never thought I’d be in this situation again. We have a son too it’s so hard the pain it’s unreal

@hacelocononda

16w

Enact vengance. That's not a relationship, it's a family. Prove your kid and your ex you are not to be fucked with.

@jackbeames7643

43w↑41

Was in a relationship for 8 months, got diagnosed with cancer 2 months in she stuck with me until last week and ended last week as things start to get tougher staring radiotherapy. She said I was insecure and controlling for not being happy with her going clubbing and meeting boys while I was sat in hospital or home feeling shit. I know it’s best for me now she’s gone as she treated me shit. But I still miss her and love her. She was so supportive at the beginning of it all. 😢

@botone2548

43w↑15

Straight up, She’s not the one for you. Stay strong, because the one for you will come and you need to be at peace and ready for a new chapter. I wish you strength and health!!! Keep fighting, you will over come your hardships!!🙏 God bless you

@Le-Nor

42w↑1

Prayers for you eat healthy and listen to water sounds try to relax your mind.
Drink plenty of water, take vitamin D3 eat chia seeds.
Try to think happy thoughts your a survivor.

@user-mi4yc7pr3x

38w↑2

You know now you have to survive the cancer so you can outgrow and be more happier then her right?

@wisconsinfarmer4742

30w↑3

Mine left me right after a devastating crash putting me in hospital . Fleeing suspect T-boned my drivers door.
They sure can show who they are, when you need them the most.

@wisconsinfarmer4742

25w

@@christinajose285 Golly! I never thought of that.

3 More Replies...

@garyly3799

1y↑42

I've been through this a few times and what Huberman is saying is spot on. In order to get through our pain, we need to feel it head on, confront it, listen to it, understand it, and take it all in. If that means crying, journaling our emotions, or talking it out with a therapist, it will all get you on to the other side. It takes time, but it's the journey that is needed to heal. I went through something like this not that long ago, and by seeking therapy and allowing myself times to grieve each day has allowed me to move on fully. It took almost a year but it was worth it. Do I still feel sad sometimes? Sure. But moving along to have an open heart is the goal. The new love will come right after.

@abhijeetgautam2719

13w↑2

I am leaving my anxiety with this message, whatever happened, there was a reason for it and all of us will be happy.

@duxmusonda

15w↑4

My relationship of 2 years ended last month…trying to be positive and move forward it definitely ain’t easy…hugs and love to anyone going through a breakup

@valeriaarboleda1324

13w↑1

How are you doing? I'm going through a similar situation, the pain is unbearable

@duxmusonda

13w

@@valeriaarboleda1324 some days I’m okay and some days I’m not…trying my best to be positive and move forward…I know it’s easier said than done but try to keep your mind busy…try new hobbies and going out more even just taking walks…we’ll get there in the end

@duxmusonda

13w

@@valeriaarboleda1324 some days are easy and some days are hard but I’m trying to be positive and move on with my life…we’ll make it through it…try to keep your mind busy and try your best to have positive thoughts you are the prize

@duxmusonda

@@valeriaarboleda1324 better but I still feel like there’s something missing in my life…some days are good and some days are bad…had a self destructive period of drinking and sleeping around thinking it will make me feel better but I was wrong…therapy helped me a lot and hanging out with my friends as well

@strikeforce1877

1y↑11

I’ve been through 7 relationships. One thing I’ve learnt is it does not get easier especially if that person ticks every box for you. It’s absolutely right when he says you need to feel the emotional trauma it has on you, if you try to neglect it , it will come and haunt you in many other ways. Being a man does not mean you are not allowed to feel pain.

@pncrmpz1851

1y↑43

I've had one bad breakup, the one that sent me to depression. I broke up 8 years ago, and I'm still feeling it now. I've moved on with my life. I've climbed out of depression, had a new girlfriend, new circle of motivating friends (I lost all my close friends when I broke up), and even got a new job (when I was still grieving I could barely hold a job).

I'm a much happier person. But the feeling of the breakup is still something that I can feel everyday, even now. Whenever I go, I still feel like she's right around the corner. I feel like her reflection is peeking on every windows and mirrors.

It feels like I just done grieving a dead person but the ghost still follows me around.

@eichkater6928

1y↑5

it might sound weird for you but the brain misinterprets the pschologcal pain from breaking up with a physical one. The brain has memories engraved onto " emotional tracks " so to say, thats why we remember things that well - wether positive happy or negative sad, memories get burned in.

If you are still thinking about exes, chances are since that time you simply have not created deeper emotional impacts in your life, so your brain can only connect to the past with the biggest emotional impact and thus deepest ingrained tracks.
I remember when my gf broke up with me after 4 years I read about pain killers numbing emotional pain as well as they Short circuit these emotional-neurological paths. So, I also had to get teeth fixed and was on 800-1000mg/ day ibuprofen for 2-3 weeks.
After 3 days I woke up I was completely changed lmao - I had the feeling of life being easy, more talkative and open for other people.

Sadness turned into callous indifference, followed by hooking up with lots of girls.
2 Months later I wondered how the ** I could even care about the relationship in the first place and even got angry about it.

@beekay1

10w↑2

Shattered my heart today.
I hope she is well and happy for all her future life.

@karanaujlatopic980

33w↑492

Its no surprise that Elowen Rasmusov is a sought-after psychotherapist for breakup counseling. Her expertise and kindness are truly exceptional.

@drew3693

39w↑18

You definitely can recover from heartbreak. Being be betrayed by the one you trusted does make it harder. But by truly working through your feelings and allowing time to do its thing, you will be healed. I promise.

@marcellowheeler88

1y↑47

I got divorced last May, I still have not gotten over it. The mental trauma that put me through I would not wish on my worst enemy. Nothing I did has moderately helped, only distracted me for a certain amount of time. No matter what I did, at the end of the day I came back alone to my apartment and reality would set in. I'm not even safe in my dreams. I'm absolutely terrified to get close to someone again because I think about breaking up in the future and not wanting to go through this again. I always still hold onto false hope that we make up in the future even though I know it will never happen.

@blastoiseboi8472

1y↑3

I know what you mean idk if it ever does get better, people say to drown yourself in work and working out but it all just seems like distracting yourself from reality

@marcellowheeler88

1y↑3

@@blastoiseboi8472 I'm going to move back to my home state and have a fresh start. I don't think I'll ever heal living in the same town.

@hillberryju

Sorry you’re going through this. Best of luck

@coopersmith8301

Wishing you the best bro ❤ It’ll get better

@amyproudfoot6611

I'm praying for you ❤️

3 More Replies...

@brendanruggles4575

37w↑20

I lost a relationship of 5 years a couple weeks ago. We have kids involved so it makes it extremely difficult to get through because I have to be in contact with her. It was a deep love and I never thought it would end. I made mistakes and I’m afraid I’ll never get over this regret.

@Inside_the_Male_Mind

24w

I wish you the best 🤞

@Jh9517gym

16w↑6

Who ever reads this just know it gets better, yeah it is so hard you feel like a part of you dies the overwhelming feeling if sadness and loss takes over but try stay strong hit the gym get to the best version of yourself thank god it was a opportunity to better yourself youll bounce back harder❤️

@AlexM-bs1pk

1y↑87

7 years of relationship that went away. She got into a relationship a month later, he moved in a month after that and 7 months after that she got pregnant. I traveled Europe and still missed her even with all the people I met and women i messed around with. My best friend, my rock and the person I loved the most I fucked it up. It's hard to date in this shitty society. All I can do is work out and focus on me. I still miss you Clarissa, every fucking day.

@ahistoryofviolence4902

1y↑4

Dear Alex,

there are many 'Clarissas'. Not to devaluate her, but no one is really that unique, or?
When you did a lot of mistakes, it would be good for you to take your time and reflect about it. Not just what you did wrong. You have to know exactly what went wrong. Did you really know her? I think this would be a good step!

@TheFeadme

1y↑3

I'm sorry man

@yajtramer6913

1y↑6

@Halonoobs1000

1y↑3

Stay strong

@avalancheKT

If you say you fucked it up, learn from this and pour all your love and lessons learned into someone else. Heartbreak sucks, going through it myself right now so I'm sorry 💔

7 More Replies...

@19zach75

48w↑30

Embracing the pain and reality of this breakup was one of the best things I ever did to help cope and accept it. I would normally avoid any thing I knew would trigger me into thinking about it. I was playing it safe. Then, one night I just threw myself into it all. Helped me tremendously!!!

@lucasdunn1147

36w

Awesome how did you do that?

@skromnyasha

22w

Me too! Honestly actually works, not very intuitive at first but just let go and embrace it. I said to myself that I'm allowing myself to grieve for three months, be absolute mess, be in pain and tears and what do you think? In a week I started to feel so much better and pain is not so sharp anymore and I feel relieved that relationship was over because he couldn't give me what I wanted. I am free to pursue what makes me feel good and safe

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