He first started uploading his instrumental music to Soundcloud in 2014 before releasing "hydroponic" on February 6, 2016, which contains Nick's vocals.
In 2017, guardin released his first official album "lacuna", which has a blend of emo with a modern hip hop sound. Earlier that same year, "Demons in My Orbit" was released, which was one of his first big hits, receiving over 20.4 million plays.
Since then he has released various singles, music videos, eps and mixtapes, along with doing many collaborations, such as with MCR's Ray Toro, Against The Current, convolk, and Sewerperson.
alive
Guardin Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Go back inside
Cry 'bout the future she'll leave you behind
I'm staying still while the seasons arrive
This ain't the place for me why do i try
Get up & drive
Go sixty five
No destination inside of my mind
Losing my head just to keep me alive
Keep me alive
Counting the time on the clock till it's five
Minutes until this disaster arrives
Lie down on the floor you'll be fine
Cold surfaces wake up my eyes
Blindsided by love bold and bright
My hearts in your hands till i die
I'd fly to japan for the night
If tour didn't have my hands tied
Why did I sign up for this?
Ask yourself the question every time you light the spliff
Is there something that I missed?
I can feel their eyes
They're watching me with every line i spit
Can you back it up a bit?
It's a little hard to breathe when privacy does not exist
Codependency is never seen as such a risk
And the artists that we love are trying hard to not get pissed
This shit's a lie
Go back inside
Cry 'bout the future she'll leave you behind
I'm staying still while the seasons arrive
This ain't the place for me why do i try
Get up & drive
Go sixty five
No destination inside of my mind
I've taken pills in the past I'll be fine
Losing my head just to keep me alive
Keep me alive
These eyes saw a lot of sights
But these guys start a lot of conflict
I'm conflicted how my life just
Breezed by lost as soon as night hits
These eyes saw a lot of sights
But these guys start a lot of conflict
I'm conflicted how my life just
Breezed by lost as soon as night hits
The lyrics of Guardin's song "Alive" chronicle the struggles of someone dealing with the depression and anxiety of their music career, as they try to balance their art with their own mental wellbeing. The artist sings of feeling lost and out of place, driving aimlessly with no set destination in their mind. They confess to taking pills in the past and feeling like they're losing their mind, yet they keep going because creating music is the only thing keeping them alive. The lyrics also touch on the lack of privacy and the constant scrutiny from the public eye that many artists face.
The chorus of the song repeatedly refers to "this shit's a lie," a statement that could refer to the illusion and façade that artists, especially those in the music industry, must often maintain to maintain their public persona. Guardin seems to be searching for a way to exist authentically without sacrificing their mental health, grappling with the contradiction of wanting to continue creating music while also feeling like it's taking a toll on their well-being. The lyric "cold surfaces wake up my eyes" could refer to the feeling of disorientation and the need to shock oneself awake from a state of numbness or dissociation, a common symptom of depression and anxiety.
Overall, "Alive" provides a raw and personal look into the pressures and mental struggles that artists can face within the music industry, and the internal conflict that arises from balancing creative expression with mental health.
Line by Line Meaning
This shit's a lie
The situation I'm in is not truthful or authentic
Go back inside
Retreat from the outside world
Cry 'bout the future she'll leave you behind
Bemoan about the future because it's uncertain and may bring sadness
I'm staying still while the seasons arrive
Remaining in one spot and letting time pass by
This ain't the place for me why do i try
I don't belong here but I still put in effort
Get up & drive
Take control and move forward
Go sixty five
Travel at a moderate speed
No destination inside of my mind
I don't have a clear goal or plan
I've taken pills in the past I'll be fine
I've had struggles before but I'll overcome them
Losing my head just to keep me alive
Making rash decisions to stay alive and cope with stress
Keep me alive
Help me to survive and continue living
Counting the time on the clock till it's five
Monitoring time until the workday is over
Minutes until this disaster arrives
A challenging situation that's looming in the near future
Lie down on the floor you'll be fine
Rest and calm down to relieve stress
Cold surfaces wake up my eyes
Chilly textures cause me to be alert and more aware
Blindsided by love bold and bright
Caught off guard by a strong and compelling emotion
My hearts in your hands till i die
I trust you deeply and will love you forever
I'd fly to japan for the night
I'm willing to go great distances for temporary comfort or escape
If tour didn't have my hands tied
If circumstances allowed me to be more free and independent
Why did I sign up for this?
Questioning the decisions that led to current circumstances
Ask yourself the question every time you light the spliff
Reflect on choices and actions while indulging in relaxation
Is there something that I missed?
Wondering if an important detail or opportunity was overlooked
I can feel their eyes
Sensing the judgment and scrutiny of others
They're watching me with every line i spit
Being observed and critiqued for every move or word
Can you back it up a bit?
Requesting some distance or space
It's a little hard to breathe when privacy does not exist
Feeling suffocated or constrained when there's no personal space
Codependency is never seen as such a risk
Being dependent on someone or something can be dangerous
And the artists that we love are trying hard to not get pissed
Famous people are trying to keep their composure despite criticism or negative attention
These eyes saw a lot of sights
Experienced many different things
But these guys start a lot of conflict
Others cause problems or drama
I'm conflicted how my life just
Facing confusion and uncertainty about life
Breezed by lost as soon as night hits
Time seems to pass quickly and life can feel fleeting
Writer(s): Lyndsey Gerd Gunnulfsen, Nicholas Kerr Carpeter, Derrick Alcorn
Contributed by Muhammad J. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
deth
This shit's a lie
Go back inside
Cry 'bout the future, she'll leave you behind
I'm staying still while the seasons arrive
This ain't the place for me, why do I try?
Get up and drive
Go sixty-five
No destination inside of my mind
I've taken pills in the past I'll be fine
Losing my head just to keep me alive, keep me alive
Keep me alive
Counting the time on the clock till it's five
Minutes until this disaster arrives
Lie down on the floor, you'll be fine
Cold surfaces wake up my eyes
Blindsided by love, bold and bright
My hearts in your hands 'till I die
I'd fly to Japan for the night
If tour didn't have my hands tied
Why did I sign up for this?
Ask yourself the question every time you light the spliff
Is there something that I missed?
I can feel their eyes, they're watching me with every line I spit
Can you back it up a bit?
It's a little hard to breathe when privacy does not exist
Codependency is never seen as such a risk
And the artists that we love are trying hard to not get pissed
This shit's a lie
Go back inside
Cry 'bout the future, she'll leave you behind
I'm staying still while the seasons arrive
This ain't the place for me, why do I try?
Get up and drive
Go sixty-five
No destination inside of my mind
I've taken pills in the past I'll be fine
Losing my head just to keep me alive, keep me alive
These eyes saw a lot of sights
But these guys start a lot of conflict
I'm conflicted how my life just
Breezed by lost as soon as night hits
These eyes saw a lot of sights
But these guys start a lot of conflict
I'm conflicted how my life just
Breezed by lost as soon as night hits
Hue Man
"This ain't the place for me why do I try"
I've felt this since I was young.
Let's make a place for us all that feel this way. We can help each other find it 💞
Normally I cant find a solitary reason to like other humans but,
I love anyone who bumps the boy.
#KeepUsAlive
Harry Elliott
Honestly masterpiece.
Kinda wanna see another sewerperson x guardin collab would blow charts out the water
LucinoGGs
Guardin and sewerperon are just on another level they make bangers whenever they collab
Matthew Møller-Madsen
@Horror9IX nope. fits well with guardin too
sir sempai
Gaurdin X Softheart
Abraham Alaniz
Yung Shadøw oh shit I haven’t heard emo punk shawty
Abraham Alaniz
baniel. Ohh, yea of course. I thought sewerperson had actually made songs with guardin currently
haqte
Guardin, I think you're really cool because you take away the pain and lately I've been addicted to your music but it's okay because listening to ur music makes it feel like it rained and it poured as I sleepwalk through the trees. Sometimes I feel caged with demons in my orbit but it's alright because at least I try... Someday I wont be an Outsider anymore👽❤❤❤
Element XVI
amazing comment wtf
Julian Peavy
I felt this for sure
LucinoGGs
Genius