Heatmiser was an alternative rock band that originated in Portland, Oregon … Read Full Bio ↴Heatmiser was an alternative rock band that originated in Portland, Oregon in 1992. Consisting of Elliott Smith (guitar and vocals), Neil Gust (guitar and vocals), Brandt Peterson (bass; later to be replaced by Sam Coomes, frontman of Quasi), and Tony Lash (drums), they were known for their well-crafted lyrics and songs featuring melancholic and cheery words and melodies. The pop-oriented songs of Elliott Smith were a contrast to the darker songs of Gust, while both Smith and Gust's songs touched on subjects such as anger, alienation, loneliness and despair.

The band broke up in the fall of 1996 after Smith's solo work began gaining popularity. Gust went on to play in the band No. 2. Coomes carried on as half of Quasi, as well as playing as a guest musician for Built to Spill and Sleater-Kinney. Lash currently keeps himself busy as a producer. He helped with the production of Death Cab for Cutie's first two studio albums (Something About Airplanes and We Have the Facts and We're Voting Yes).

Rest My Head Against the Wall
Heatmiser Lyrics

Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴

I don't know when I lost my nerve
And I started a routine
And I walked across this corner
Pinned my eyes to a shirt

'Cause I'm scared of being seen
Locked myself in a stall
Rest my head against the wall

Still drunk I had a dream in the morning

Pin myself to the chore
Looking through the cracks I saw the shadows on the tile
So I knocked on all the unlocked doors
Locked myself in a stall

Rest my head against the wall
And I'm not sure
That I've ever had the nerve
'Cause I've always felt like an easy kill

But I'm pretty sure
That I'm never going to know
If I'm his kind of pill
Unlocked the stall and wandered off

Left my number on the wall

Overall Meaning

The lyrics to Heatmiser's song "Rest My Head Against the Wall" explore themes of alienation, fear, and uncertainty. The first verse sets the tone for the song, with the singer expressing confusion about when they "lost [their] nerve." They describe walking across a corner and pinning their eyes to a shirt, suggesting that they are trying to blend in and avoid drawing attention to themselves.

The second verse reveals that the singer is afraid of being seen, goading them to lock themselves in a stall where they can hide from the world. The lyrics "rest my head against the wall" suggest a feeling of defeat and resignation. The singer feels lost and scared, and even when they have a dream in the morning, they are still unable to find the courage to face their fears.

In the final verse, the singer admits that they have always felt like an "easy kill," implying that they are vulnerable and easily targeted by others. They are uncertain about what kind of person they are, or whether they will ever be able to find the strength to confront their demons. The song's melancholic tone and introspective lyrics create a sense of angst and despair that many can relate to.

Line by Line Meaning

I don't know when I lost my nerve
I'm not exactly sure when I became timid or less confident

And I started a routine
I began following a certain pattern or habit

And I walked across this corner
I crossed a street corner

Pinned my eyes to a shirt
I focused my eyes on a shirt, possibly avoiding eye contact with people

'Cause I'm scared of being seen
I'm afraid of drawing attention to myself

Locked myself in a stall
I went inside a bathroom stall and locked it

Rest my head against the wall
I leaned my head on the bathroom stall wall, possibly to steady myself or find comfort

Still drunk I had a dream in the morning
Despite being drunk, I had a dream when I woke up the following morning

Pin myself to the chore
I constrain or force myself to do something as if it's a chore or task

Looking through the cracks I saw the shadows on the tile
I peered through the gaps in the bathroom stall door and saw the shadows cast by the tiles

So I knocked on all the unlocked doors
I knocked on all the doors of other bathroom stalls, which weren't locked