The band broke up in the fall of 1996 after Smith's solo work began gaining popularity. Gust went on to play in the band No. 2. Coomes carried on as half of Quasi, as well as playing as a guest musician for Built to Spill and Sleater-Kinney. Lash currently keeps himself busy as a producer. He helped with the production of Death Cab for Cutie's first two studio albums (Something About Airplanes and We Have the Facts and We're Voting Yes).
Why Did I Decide to Stay
Heatmiser Lyrics
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While you put your empty arms around me
Kept my shirt on
And wrestled my memory down
When I put my arm around you
I had to hold my mand in place
I didn't move to keep you from feeling chased
You smile easy
What was I supposed to say?
Hits the ground
And it dies easy
Why did I decide to stay?
looks like I should forget you now
Underneath the covers I'm not naked
Maybe you were never next to me
Does all recorded history start tomorrow morning?
Did you forget or were your kisses my final warning?
a spent bullet brought me down
Add me to the list you stopped with blanks
Or how about a rundown of the top 100
Where do I rank
Did I even make the list
Or did I make a big mistake?
dropping off
You smile easy
What was I supposed to say
The lyrics to Heatmiser's song, "Why Did I Decide to Stay?" may be interpreted as a reflection on a failed relationship. The singer seems conflicted about his feelings towards his partner. While his partner reaches out for an embrace, he still keeps his coat and shirt on. He appears to be fighting off his memories and trying to keep his feelings for his partner in check. When he finally does put his arm around her, it feels forced, as he tries to balance his urge for affection and his reluctance to be vulnerable.
Line by Line Meaning
Kept my coat on
I felt disconnected and distant even when you tried to be physically close.
While you put your empty arms around me
Your attempted embrace felt like you were seeking something from me that I couldn't offer.
Kept my shirt on
I held onto my emotions and didn't let myself become vulnerable to you.
And wrestled my memory down
I struggled to forget the past and focus on the present moment with you.
When I put my arm around you
I tried to connect with you, but it didn't feel genuine.
I had to hold my mand in place
I had to control my mind and not let my true feelings show.
I didn't move to keep you from feeling chased
I didn't want to scare you off or make you feel like I was pursuing you too aggressively.
Dropping off
Things are ending and fading away.
You smile easy
You seem to be moving on easily without me.
What was I supposed to say?
I didn't know how to respond or act in this situation.
Hits the ground
This situation is coming to an end and is final.
And it dies easy
Our relationship didn't have a strong foundation and was easy to let go of.
Why did I decide to stay?
I regret staying in this relationship and wish I had left earlier.
Looks like I should forget you now
It's time for me to move on and forget about you.
Underneath the covers I'm not naked
Even in intimate moments, I still feel emotionally guarded.
Maybe you were never next to me
Our relationship was never as close or meaningful as I thought.
Does all recorded history start tomorrow morning?
I'm questioning the value and relevance of our past together.
Did you forget or were your kisses my final warning?
Did you intentionally distance yourself from me or did you give me a sign that our relationship was over?
A spent bullet brought me down
Our relationship had run its course and couldn't survive any longer.
Add me to the list you stopped with blanks
I feel like I'm just another name on your list of failed relationships.
Or how about a rundown of the top 100
I'm wondering where I rank among all of your past partners.
Where do I rank
I'm curious about how significant or insignificant I was to you.
Did I even make the list
I'm questioning whether our relationship meant anything to you at all.
Or did I make a big mistake?
I'm reflecting on my own choices and whether I made a mistake by staying in this relationship.
Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group
Written by: SMITH, STEVEN PAUL / GUST, NEIL JACOB / LASH, TONY / PETERSON, BRANDT GUSTAV
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind