Over 5000 years ago, from the dry stretches of the not-so-fertile crescent … Read Full Bio ↴Over 5000 years ago, from the dry stretches of the not-so-fertile crescent wandered a nomadic, foul smelling people. A robust, well-endowed, and manly tribe, they were united through ancient rituals involving instruments capable of infinite fonkiness and overt sekshul innuendo. The Pharaoh, a mean mother (shutcho' mouth), hated the nomads and their ability to shred like a mofo all up in that biatch. But more than that, he hated the power of their righteous grooving to make drop the tunics of his five luscious teenage daughters. One night, the Pharaoh found the nomads dressed as mummies and creating grooves in an effort to compromise the moral integrity of his five daughters. The angry Pharaoh cursed the nomads (already conveniently dressed as mummies) with a spell so vile, that seeing its name in print here would make your eyes melt and flow freely from their sockets. Already doomed, these nomads fled into the night, at last finding refuge in the abandoned caves of the Unleavened Jews. But when the sun rose the following morning, the Pharoah's curse had taken hold, and these were men no more. For years, scholars of the ancient world wondered what became of this group. Theories citing the Mummies' involvement in historical events from the Siege of Troy to the sacking of Rome, the fall of Pompeii and the sinking of Atlantis were initially scoffed at and dismissed as parlor quackery. However, in 1922, at a dig in the desert south of Tunis, Professor Nigel Quentin Fontenelle Dumblucke IV unearthed the ruins of an ancient discotheque and found a dozen stank-ass fonky mummies still all up in the act of rockin' tha hizouse. From these mummies, Professor Dumblucke learned of the powerful curse that doomed them to wander the earth throughout eternity, seeking the ultimate riff, the one that would allow these souls to finally rest after 5000 years of banging out solid fly grooves. To quote the Professor: "In their desperate quest for immortal peace, they rocked all the ancient empires of Earth on down to the grizound. They rocked Atlantis so hard, y'all, it ain't never been found". And now they're coming to rock your town with a funk so strong, it's gonna make the cats explode, canya diggit?

Jailbait
Here Come the Mummies Lyrics

Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴

Sweet sweet, young and horny
Can't tell if she's statutory
Glory glory hole-lujah

Smokin' testy debutante
Cotton panty, sex dream haunt
Think before you make a mistake
She's jailbait

She could rock your world
You'd better pass up on this girl
But you can't handle the truth
She makes you wanna 'Tom Cruise'

She's hot, don't even
She's not in season
She's here to play, but she still won't say
Got to beat it before it's too late
She's jailbait

Don't drink this wine before it's had
Some more blood to drop in dye
You'll be hanging from the E&J Gallo (ws)

I know you wanna plow it
But daddy won't allow it
You know you got to leave that field fallow

She's hot, don't even
She's not in season
She's here to play, but she still won't say
Got to beat it before it's too late
She's jailbait

(Here comes Scott Baio)

Sweet sweet, young and horny (she's jailbait)
Can't tell if she's statutory (she's jailbait)
Smokin' testy debutante (she's jailbait)

Cotton panty, sex dream haunt (she's jailbait)
Think before you make a mistake

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of Here Come the Mummies' song Jailbait are controversial and disturbing, as they seem to glorify the idea of pursuing an underage girl. The song speaks about a young, attractive girl who appears to be sexually mature and available. However, the lyrics warn the listener that this young girl is still legally considered a minor and therefore off-limits. The repetition of the phrase "she's jailbait" throughout the song emphasizes the gravity of the situation and the importance of staying away from the forbidden fruit.

The lyrics are symbolic of the male desire to pursue young, attractive women, despite their age and potential legal implications. It speaks to the idea that even though a woman may be physically mature, a man needs to consider the consequences and legality of pursuing her. The use of metaphors, such as "Glory glory hole-lujah" and "You'll be hanging from the E&J Gallo," add to the sexually charged nature of the song, making it even more uncomfortable and disturbing.

Overall, the song's message is one of caution, warning the listener to think twice before pursuing an underage girl. It represents a societal issue that has been going on for years, and the song serves as a reminder that it is not okay to engage in such behavior.

Line by Line Meaning

Sweet sweet, young and horny
A description of a girl who is physically attractive and sexually curious

Can't tell if she's statutory
Uncertainty about the age of the girl in question and whether or not she is legally of age

Glory glory hole-lujah
A play on words, with 'hole-lujah' sounding like 'Hallelujah' and referencing a sexual act

Smokin' testy debutante
An attractive, spirited young woman

Cotton panty, sex dream haunt
An alluring image of the girl wearing revealing underwear

Think before you make a mistake
A warning to consider the consequences of engaging with an underage girl

She's jailbait
Explicitly labeling the girl as underage and off-limits

She could rock your world
Acknowledging the girl's sexual appeal

You'd better pass up on this girl
A suggestion to avoid getting involved with her

But you can't handle the truth
A reference to the famous line from 'A Few Good Men', implying that the reality of the situation is difficult to face

She makes you wanna 'Tom Cruise'
A pun on the phrase 'jump the couch', referencing Tom Cruise's bizarre behavior on the Oprah Winfrey show and suggesting that the girl is so tempting that it might make you act out of character

She's hot, don't even
Admitting the girl's attractiveness but still emphasizing her off-limits status

She's not in season
Contrasting the girl with an animal in heat, stressing the necessity of self-control

She's here to play, but she still won't say
Suggesting that the girl is sexually forward but also secretive about her age

Got to beat it before it's too late
Urging the listener to remove themselves from the situation before anything illegal happens

Don't drink this wine before it's had
A cryptic warning that indulging in this girl is risky

Some more blood to drop in dye
An obscure line that adds to the eerie atmosphere and vague sense of danger

You'll be hanging from the E&J Gallo (ws)
A reference to the cheap wine brand E&J Gallo and a warning that if you engage with the girl, you'll face consequences

I know you wanna plow it
Acknowledging the listener's sexual desire for the girl

But daddy won't allow it
Reminding the listener that the girl's guardians have the final say and that engaging with her would be against their wishes

You know you got to leave that field fallow
A farming metaphor for letting the land rest and not engaging in sexual activity with an underage girl

Sweet sweet, young and horny (she's jailbait)
Repeating the initial description of the girl, but adding the explicit label of 'jailbait'

Can't tell if she's statutory (she's jailbait)
Repeating the uncertainty about the girl's age, but making it clear that engaging with her would be illegal

Smokin' testy debutante (she's jailbait)
Repeating the description of the girl, but adding the explicit label of 'jailbait'

Cotton panty, sex dream haunt (she's jailbait)
Repeating the alluring image of the girl in revealing underwear, but adding the explicit label of 'jailbait'

Contributed by Asher G. Suggest a correction in the comments below.

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