Horrible Microsoft
Hikkikomore and more Lyrics

We have lyrics for these tracks by Hikkikomore and more:

I'm not hero Someday I'll wake up an older man than I am And…
Prince Just another fairy tale Like the movies you were there It wa…
Resurrection Let's go hang at the graveyard Dressed up, nowhere to go We'…
Ruins I got a semi hollow body on my chest. My…

Singer When did sweet pandora see it open Melodies get harder…

The lyrics are frequently found in the comments by searching or by filtering for lyric videos

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Most interesting comment from YouTube:

wurb

3y↑2

7:00: Okay, T-Bone! Time for some serious crunching!

I'm using Windows
Windows, Windows 386
So all my app-li-cations are running at once
My report right now, is scattered all over my desk
W-w-w-windows will pull these files together real quick
I got pieces in one spreadsheet
I got pieces in another
I got pieces that have never been close to one another
Some are in the da-ta-base where things are pretty stuffy
Some are in the word pro-cess-or, that's where it gets fluffy(?)
W-w-windows, W-w-windows, Windows 386
Will pull these parts together and do it mighty quick
I'll cut and paste, cut-and-paste until it's in Pagemaker
Then I'll slick it up to be T-Bone's heartbreaker.

(Linda takes off her clothes)

"Here's the spreadsheet data you asked for Linda..."

WILLIAM!

"Linda! Uh-oh. These are 1-2-3 files. That doesn't look like 1-2-3."

8:13 - It's Na-Na-Not!
1-2-2-2-3! But don't wo-rry Will-iam, just hand the disk to me!
BARK BARK BARK
I got! Several applications looking mighty slick
Running un-der Win-dows 386!
BARK BARK BARK
In one of the win-dows I've got 1-2-2-2-3
Running at the same time as the others, can't you see?
BARK BARK BARK
I can cut and paste your files in-to my report
Or I can make them look bet-ter with Mi-cro-soft Chart
Charts is Charts is Charts is what I got
CYMBAL SPLASH
Now I'm gonna show you how to make the thing look hot!
BARK

"I'm in accounting! Nothing ever looks hot!"

SYNTH SOLO

Stand! Back William, stand b-b-b-back
Windows 386! IS ON THE ATTACK!

CYMBAL SPLASH, SYNTH SOLO CONTINUES WITH VAGUE MISSION IMPOSSIBLE INTERPOLATIONS AND VINYL SCRATCHING

"Wooooooow..."

All comments from YouTube:

dlarge6502

10y↑75

I really liked this advert till 7 mins in. I was thinking how is this a bad advert? I mean compared to the hilarious and embarrassing DOS 5 advert this is actually quite pleasant.

Then they started rapping.

Scott Larson

I lost interest about four minutes in. Why am I watching a woman editing a document and talking to herself?

Ian Drsaurri

10y

I feel your pain

Emilio Cruz

11y↑33

This has Ballmer written all over it.

Richard Hall

3y↑1

DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS!!!!!!
sweats through shirt

that kind of boi

like ballmer

Zoomer30

4y↑5

This has mounds of cocaine all over it.

Get Rikkity Rekt

7y↑67

When you abruptly stop taking your Antipsychotics, but you still got work to do.

Emmet Cromie

9y↑12

This is actually the funniest thing I have ever seen in my life.

Steve Arrants

8y↑23

This was't a commercial. This was an internal video shown at a company meeting. Still, pretty cheesy.

nutsackmania

5y↑8

I wouldve committed seppuku in the meeting so my family maintained their honor

roachtoasties

11y↑8

This must be one of those how things will be in the future videos. I'm still using Windows 7. I don't know how long it will be until we get all the way up to Windows 386. That's 379 versions away. I probably won't live that long.

Eliezer Pennywhistler

7y↑19

I must say - using a C-120 cassette for a two-minute message is wasteful of the corporation's money.

anonUK

5y↑4

A self-destructing C120 that kills the player as well...

Adam Putman

9y↑57

I got nervous when she started rapping.

Eduardo Baluyot III

This not Memories right it is Banned or Weird Commercial
Warning: Attention the Word Memories has Been Detected
CONFIRMED THE BSOD?
/CON
/AUX
/NO

Eduardo Baluyot III

7y↑1

Adam Putman LYNDA uses WINDOWS 8

Eduardo Baluyot III

Adam Putman looks like Taylor Swift (Her Favorite Eat was Cheesecake

markustegelane

Adam Putman I got nervous when reading this comment

Kaitlyn L

+Stephen Pickering white people still can't rap tbh

SigEpBlue

9y↑30

I suppose it's no coincidence the crack epidemic started a mere three years before this video was created.

andymate2006

8y↑32

They should have a promo like this for Windows 10. All the same cast and crew.

V. Dargain

Uh-huh . Good idea .

Maximilian Power

6y↑16

Windows 386... according to this video it:

- makes you go crazy
- makes all your co workers respect and admire you
- gets you a date
- makes word documents

Well im sold! Where can I buy?

Rebecca Dale

4y↑4

Step 1 be in the 1980s
Step 2 have money
Step 3 order out of a magazine
Step 4 install

BlueDragon992

7y↑11

7:12 And just when you thought this couldn't possibly get any cheesier, she starts rapping. Oh joy...

Forest Moore

8y↑43

So... how much did Microsoft pay to use the "Mission Impossible" theme song in this video?

Larry Parry

@Cowclops i would download a new house

Guilherme Vieira Dutra

@Robert Plank I got that reference from Software Publishers Association

Robert Plank

4y↑1

Cowclops "You wouldn't steal a car..." But if a friend asked, "I just bought a new car, can I burn you a copy?" I would say yes.

Cowclops

4y↑2

@Robert Plank I would hella download a car if i could.

Robert Plank

4y↑4

@Cowclops Don't copy that floppy!

1 More Replies...

Rampant Obesity

11y↑6

This feels like they didn't know which audience they were going for.

Brian Dougherty

3y↑1

this needs a 4K rescan of the original film prints and a theatrical wide release.

pfcrezende

6y↑12

I actually liked the ad, so I stopped at around 7 minutes in to read the comments, and then got warned there would be rapping. Rapping? So I resume play and right there it starts. Damn! The ad was fine till then.

V. Dargain

She wasn't as good as Blondie's Debbie Harry . But she was cool with it .

Laconic913

8y↑37

7:05 and 8:13
Apparently Windows 386 gives you brain damage.

Charles N

Choices Choices Choices, like why the hell did I decide to kill brain cells watch this..

x x

8y↑1

I would have loved to hear the director and producer pitch this ...idea!

fyadcorp

12y↑2

I keep a cassette tape player in my office for just such an occasion

Charles Grove

12y↑4

Nobody caught that that guy's name is "Mike Clock?" Cmon internet...

Techommentary

9y↑12

I didn't know that Cindy Lauper worked for Microsoft.

V. Dargain

LOL . This all supposed to be secret .

Eduardo Baluyot III

Techommentary Pokemon incoming: Cindy Uses Windows 2.0

wurb

3y↑2

Goytá F. Villela Jr.

11y↑13

06:27: impressed with the screen refresh time. That PC must be a beast, at least a 25-MHz 386 with 4 MB RAM, probably 387 math co-processor, and I wouldn't be surprised if it even had a hard disk! Yes, maybe 10 or even 20 MB! That modem must be at least 2400 baud. And did you notice that the monitor was in color? Wow! And to top it all, it runs W-W-Windows three-eigh-ty-six! Jeez, you could buy a small car with that configuration's price. Top-notch! :-)

VolodyA! V Anarhist

9y↑1

I love it. I actually think it's a rather cool and funny advert for what it's worth.

Alex Brown

12y↑2

i love how on every page he was looking through theres a picture of the space shuttle on every page in the same place...

Todd Stewart

Back in those days I always just used dos and q-dos to open my apps and games.

Frankie R. Brown

5y↑1

gotta love that synth solo 8:53

Robert Plank

And it even ends on a Night Court freeze frame... perfect.

J.P. Wing

At 11:08 I guess I never realized how short Linda is. Either that or William is super tall.

hipertrofia

13y↑5

The music was made with the Windows 386 MIDI editor as well? xD

dessnom

4y↑1

its like how 7 minutes in the directures gut drunk

homg85

8y↑9

wow so 80s... but the lame 80s...

Eduardo Baluyot III

did you she name was Lynda with this girl with a Nerd and Bad Hair

Aaron David Kofi

10y↑1

Wows, now we have Macapple Pentagon with Gigis of Rams.

Tyler Cameron

11y

I can watch a YouTube video and organize my files at the same time on my phone. Or IM/messaging while watching a video at the same time, etc.

ondiras

9y↑9

It's like the résumé of a failed decade...

Uso Indevido

7y↑14

How did Microsoft survived this? and Vista? And W8? And Windows phone? How is MS still alive?

Richard Sequeira Teixeira Alves

The successor of Windows 2.0, Windows 3.0 was a complete game changer for the company.

Morgan Ainsworth

Because their successes have outweighed all their downfalls.. Windows 1.1, Windows 7, Windows XP, Office, XBOX, MS-DOS, Surface, and many other successes to beat the downfalls of the company...

Kirus

Despite criticism, Windows has always been the most intuitive operating system.

Knuckles' Reviews

Remember, they have a shit ton of cash.

Tooplaynator

6y↑1

and ME

Coco

5y↑1

Looks like Microsoft was still planning to fall back onto OS/2 if Windows failed.

TheSILENTHILL4545

11y

OH DAMN!!! Im SOOO glad they dont make adds like this anymore!

Dolly Manex

The sad thing is also that the amount Microsoft spent on this ad, I could live on for life!

Anon Ymous

8y↑1

2:35 is when shit goes down

mikyosie17

Oh boy, how David Vik did his job.

SouthwesternEagle

13y

I need popcorn for this.

Pedro Matheus

TOP 10 BEST ANIME RAPS

Number 9

Linda!

SouthwesternEagle

11y

Back in the '80s, futurism was a drug in and of itself.

derpy_drg

3y↑1

I am sure changing clothes in offices are against company guidelines

Jordyn Wolrige

7y↑1

It's a great commercial!

Mostly harmless

11y

good ole windows anyone rember DOS that was fun

Vincent Rubino

8y↑3

This was my favorite OS until Windows XP came out. I ADORE this promotional tool. It is so feminist! LOVES IT!

James McManus

So the whole company has to use Windows because one analyst was dating the Windows salesman. Nice!

Solaceanimations

those midi's tho

Dolly Manex

5y↑4

did any of these people ever work again after this?

Lemon Birdo

Chicks writing reports in 1986: "I'll just go online for that."

moochincrawdad

I STOPPED the video at the 7:19 mark and I refuse to watch any further! 🤣🤣🤣

Will It Fizz!

9y↑10

The whole video fell apart after 8 minutes

Eduardo Baluyot III

+dalekman tardis secret name TARDIS (Meaning a Machine that Teleports or Time Travel

Ya Boi Maxwell

8y↑2

This whole video fell apart after 10 seconds.

Trev0r98

"Linda" here reminds me a little of "Bailey" (played by Jan Smithers - who was 10x hotter), from "WKRP in Cincinnati".

Rob Camp

AND THEN EVERYONE STOOD UP AND CLAPPED

Andrew Jhonsen

12y

Yea most I watch at night go for 2 hours.

Herrr Argus Varnheim III

Steve Ballmer is an important Steve in the computer world

LordGoatAlmighty

8y↑8

why did that lady go all mentally ill

Vink

7y↑3

Have you ever had to use Windows? ;-)

DelilahThePig

Couldn't she do all this on a Mac without jumping through hoops? Anything prior to Windows 3.1 just seems maddening.

asteroid1717

11y

If I had that Cyndi Lauper clone marching in place and wagging her finger at me, I'd run away, not hand her files.

Alfred Glickman

what a heartbreaking ending... a freaking sales guy!

V. Dargain

He obviously the after work dinner date with her . Success !

Laconic913

+Alfred Glickman A crummy commercial?! ...Son of a bitch!

samtheguy555

13y

I wonder what computer that was!

megabomberman999

11y↑1

4 applications running at once? WOW!

fyadcorp

12y

Easy way to prevent an unwanted shutdown: don't flip the power switch

KlutzyBlubber

7:54 MLG Shades

VectraQS

On top of this, Windows/386 is just about the shittiest piece of software ever written. Won't run in a virtual machine, won't run on an actual 386.

samtheguy555

13y

I like this!!!!!!!!

cr

8y↑1

PRESS "PLAY" ON TAPE.

Tt89

5y↑1

I'd say this commercial is about showing people how Windows 386 made Linda mentally ill.

Rick Bustamante

11y

And why didn't they ever turn on the office lights back then?

Dolly Manex

Bill Gates actually okayed this.

Dennis Gründig

11y

first it was cheesy but when she started singing and rapping, i had a hard time keeping myself from suicide...

Harry Tsang

This one just a bit long, remember how Steve Blamer scream about Windows 1.0 and Windows XP?

Mr. FIRED Up Wealth

3y↑1

240P nice! :)

anish4

11y

she reminds me of faithless

Heather Hutchinson

Things are quite legit until the 7th minute ....

fyadcorp

12y↑2

It only took 20 years for designers to learn putting the power switch on the front was more convenient than on the back.

Claudia Burns

The original IBM PC 5150 from 1981 had the switch on the right side of the machine

lwatcdr

11y

Unless you had an Amiga. Just goes to show you that the best tech does not always win.

girlstorm09

she reminds me a little like Lenord's mom from The Big Bang Theory. appearance and mannerisms

Bizarrix

12y

7:41 rap will give me a headache

Andres Bravo

7:05 Andres Bravo: Allright, Time for some Rapping! Let's see if this OS Could Make the Job Done! ;-)
Edit: jeez, it’s 10 years since your video uploaded on YouTube... what a hit!

Andres Bravo

8:13 And I'm Feeling Like A common 80's style since before the 90's existed... (But I Was Born in 2003.)

Xyzyxx

And then everybody clapped.

vercetti56

12y

and they put a 7 year old kid on the keyboards for the rap beat. brilliant.

teknokrat1

12y↑1

you must be pretty young to have such a small perception of time. i remember when i started working at my current job, i was 25 and everybody else was 40+. i had no idea that people that "old" didn't always look that old. by the way, i was born in 1980 and i'm not dead. WEIRD huh??? this vid is from 1989 i believe?

techstormster

10y↑3

Oh god the sexual suspense is killing me.

Janne Väätäinen

Are those Gargoyles "Terminator" sunglasses? That chick looks sweeet!

Fi

11y

Or they could have licensed the music from the copyright owner.

Steve Johnston

11y↑2

Perhaps add Jerry Seinfeld and you've got something.

MatchstalkMan

10y

That 'rap' (and I use the word 'rap' quite incorrectly) she drones out sounds like Sheldon's "Bongos Rap" on TBBT.

Robert Hunter

5y↑5

Ow. The rapping. Jesus...
That was different time I know... But like.... wut?

stubhead

9y↑7

That was not possible. I did NOT see that. No.

markustegelane

stubhead yes you did

Héctor Aguilar

The boss sounds like Kevin Spacey on House of Cards

Insert name here

11y

The 80s were weird.

Alpha8713

4y↑1

Why does every page of the report have a picture of a space shuttle on it?

buZztiaan

anyone coming for the gangster rap segment, 07:00

michaeldim1

8y↑4

Windows 386... IS ON THE ATTACK

Автомобильный Программист

)))

Adam Kallin

5y↑1

Am I on drugs?

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