i died with you
Hotel Books Lyrics

Break this bread like you broke his body and raise a glass above your eye level.
Commune with those around you, symbolically breaking bread and raising a glass to celebrate life.

Boast in the moments that leave a stable memory to scare away the remains of the devil.
Treasure the moments that leave lasting memories to drive away any negative thoughts or feelings.

Let that alcohol burn out the demons in your mouth, spitting venom on lovers, leaving them with doubt.
Use alcohol to release pent up emotions and express them in a hurtful way towards loved ones, causing doubt in the relationship.

Just don't choke on communion or those emotions. Swallow down a staining memory before it's washed out.
Don't let your emotions overwhelm you to the point of choking during the symbolic act of communion. Swallow any painful memories and keep them with you instead of trying to forget them.

My guilty conscience was a chaser for every broken rib, every shred of skin, my selfish repentance, my need to feel clean just so I can copy and paste the same burden.
Feeling guilty and constantly trying to repent for past mistakes is like chasing a drink after a hurtful physical experience, only to later realize that the same burden remains.

Rinsing cuts with alcoholic remedies to bury the pharisees, chasing my apathy with a need for attention.
Using alcohol to numb emotional pain and bury any hypocritical thoughts, while also seeking attention to fill a void.

A retention of amens to cover the blood drips and bloodshed of broken men who put purpose to the regurgitated blood dripping from the mouth of me and my emotions, and that's why that I can't feel any of this.
The desire to sound faithful and religious, while also acknowledging the pain caused by others and the brokenness within oneself, causing a numbing to any emotions.

If I didn't die with you, I don't think I've ever lived. If I didn't try to save you, it just shows my selfishness.
The only way to truly live and have purpose is to share in the pain and experiences of others, and not trying to help others demonstrates selfishness.

Offer it to the serpents that listen to the end of this. Always hide who you want to be until it's gone, I can see that I don't have anything at all.
Give the pain and struggle as an offering to those who are only there to cause harm, and always hide the true self until it's too late and nothing is left.

The naked cannot clothe the poor in spirit with oxygen and the wine I tasted reminded me of the night she took advantage of my advances rather than the blood sacrifice that I can make a better decision.
Those without anything to give cannot help lift up those who are struggling, and experiencing a bitter taste in wine reminds of a moment of being taken advantage of instead of focusing on the sacrifice that could bring better choices.

A guilty conscience is better than no consideration I guess but the rest is placed in a test of time versus how much I care about my own mess.
Feeling guilty for past mistakes is at least better than not considering them at all, but ultimately the struggle is between time passing and how much one cares about addressing their own problems.

When I can't see the beauty in her scars but only the body in her dress, how is this love when the scars paved the way to the truth in all of this?
Unable to appreciate the deeper emotional experiences and scars of a loved one, only seeing outward appearances, causes a questioning of whether this is true love when the past struggles are what led to discovering the greater truth.

The comfort of existence removed my need to chase love and I conformed to something fake cause it's easier than turning to above rather than trusting that I can make up my own ending, something I can break.
The complacency of living removes the desire to truly pursue love, and conforming to something fake is easier than turning to a higher power and trusting in one's own ability to make choices and break away from negative patterns.

Now this wine is a bitter sting rather than something sweet and I have all I want but nothing that I need. I have nothing. Nothing.
Experiencing bitterness in wine symbolizes a bitter and unfulfilling life, having everything but nothing that truly satisfies. Feeling empty and having nothing to hold onto.

I trusted your love and listened to every word that you said, I had so many words to say but now they're just stuck in my head.
Trusting in the love of another and listening intently, but unable to express oneself and having trapped thoughts.