Blood
In This Moment Lyrics

I hate you for the sacrifices you made for me
I resent you for all the things you gave up for my sake.

I hate you for every time you ever bled for me
I resent you too, for all the pain inflicted in ensuring my well-being.

I hate you for the way you smile when you look at me
Your attempts to hide your manipulations through affection are loathsome.

I hate you for never taking control of me
I resent you for not asserting your dominance over me, I am angry that you didn't care what was best for me.

I hate you for always saving me from myself
I am angry with you for not allowing me to make my own mistakes, even though I know I am sometimes self-destructive.

I hate you for always choosing me and not someone else
I am angry that you never gave me the chance to choose for myself, making me feel guilty for any decision that doesn't align with what you want.

I hate you for always pulling me back from the edge
I resent you for always stopping me before I put myself in danger, even though that's what I craved and secretly longed for.

I hate you for every kind word you ever said
I am resentful of your attempts to reassure me, reminding me that I can argue with myself alone if I need some positivity.

Blood, blood, blood, pump mud through my veins
My desire for chaos and destruction is fierce and dangerous.

Shut your dirty, dirty mouth, I'm not that insane
I know what I'm doing and I resent any implication that I am irrational or can't decide for myself.

I'm a dirty, dirty girl, I want it filthy
My temptation for depravity grows stronger with every passing day, and I hate that part of myself.

I love you for everything you ever took from me
Despite my resentment, I also feel dependent on you, and feel incomplete without you.

I love the way you dominate when you violate me
I am enamored with your ability to take control, even when I feel violated.

I love you for every time you gave up on me
I love that you are sometimes absent from my life, and that I can wallow in my own self-pity.

I love you for the way you look when you lie to me
I fall for every trick you throw my way, even though I know I shouldn't.

I love you for never believing in what I say
I am not trustworthy, and I admire you for realizing that and taking appropriate steps to protect yourself.

I love you for never once giving me my way
I admire your strength, even though it's an inconvenience in my life.

I love you for never delivering me from pain
I long for the pain that you avoid, and admire you for not giving it to me.

I love you for always driving me insane
I am addicted to the thrill you provide, and when you're gone, I crave it even more.