Satellite
Invalids Lyrics

We learned to stop staring at the floor
We stopped dwelling on our thoughts, stopped being captivated by them.

We learned to stop hoping it would offer us our guidance anymore
We stopped relying on our thoughts to guide us or direct our actions.

There was a turn before you froze
There was a moment of change or decision before you became unable to act or think clearly.

We all knew it was something when
We all sensed that something significant was happening or about to happen.

Everyone was backing up
Everyone was retreating or avoiding the situation.

(I know it won't matter, I won't keep bringing it up)
I acknowledge that my words won't change the situation, so I won't keep repeating them.

So we'll sit in silence once more
We'll endure the discomfort and awkwardness of silence, as we've done before.

So we offered silent answers
We communicated non-verbally or with minimal words.

(open so, as you're breaking up)
(a fragment of a larger sentence)

Kept to myself and you kept to yourself
We both kept our thoughts and feelings to ourselves.

And we hoped one another could not keep it up
We hoped that the other person wouldn't persist in being distant or silent.

Moving across the hall
Changing location, possibly to avoid someone or something.

I said I'd call
I promised to make contact or communicate with someone.

There was no answer
No one responded or communicated back.

There was no reason
There was no explanation or justification for the lack of response.

Wandered off from the backyard
Moved away from a familiar or comfortable place.

There were no answers to anything we called
We received no responses or explanations for anything we questioned or inquired about.

I waited for you before we went in
I delayed our entrance until you arrived or caught up.

And you said
You responded with words or actions.

Slept at your desk and you slept in your closet
You slept in unconventional or uncomfortable places, suggesting emotional distress or instability.

You got rid of everything but it wasn't working
You tried to eliminate distractions or possessions but it didn't improve your mental state or situation.

Fled into turning to seek rolling over
Attempted to escape or distract oneself from reality by turning or rolling over.

There's no reason to think that anything was happening
There was no evidence or explanation for the situation or state of mind.

But it still feels like we're falling forever
Despite the lack of explanation or reason, we feel like we're spiraling or sinking uncontrollably.

And even in dreams
Even in our subconscious or imaginative states.

There're still some things that we can't make up
There are still aspects or details of reality that we cannot fabricate or control, even in our minds.

Said it really happens if you don't wake up
Said that certain things or events can only happen or exist if we acknowledge or confront them.

Thought if you concentrated hard enough you could control
Thought that one's thoughts or focus could influence or dictate one's surroundings or circumstances.

The governing circumstances keeping you grounded
The external factors or challenges that limit or restrict one's mobility, aspirations, or mindset.

You tried but you couldn't control anything
Despite one's efforts, one could not manipulate or change the situation or outcomes.

And there's no reason we set there
There was no justification for why we were there or remaining there.

On the grass that never grew
On a barren, lifeless area or environment.

Feigning interest in alien things
Pretending to be interested or engaged in things that were unfamiliar or irrelevant.

So at least we had something to say
So that we could have a conversation or avoid silence.

Answering between clarity
Responding to each other with indirect, unclear statements.

So at least we had some place to stray
So at least we had a topic or direction to discuss or explore.

Wait on headlights when you're coming over
Expecting or anticipating someone's arrival or presence.

Still worried it won't go away
Still anxious or uncertain about the situation or feelings.

And all we had as we waited there
All we had to occupy ourselves or focus on, as we waited.

Was waiting there
The act or state of waiting, which lacked purpose or resolution.

Promise me you'll never bother
Make a commitment to refrain from asking or questioning.

Asking me what I'm thinking when you know
Asking a rhetorical question, knowing that the answer is obvious or unsaid.

You know there's nothing to say
You recognize that there is nothing new or meaningful to discuss or express.

You'll know what it is anyway
You'll understand or infer the meaning or significance anyway.

Entirely something else than when you're alone
The experience or feeling is completely different when shared with someone else, compared to being alone.

Maybe it was something we didn't want to know
The situation or revelation may have been something we deliberately avoided or repressed.

Maybe it earned its place hidden under us all
Perhaps the situation or emotion was deeply ingrained or rooted in our subconscious or shared experiences.

All the time trying to give meaning undue
Continually attempting to assign or justify meaning where it is not warranted or relevant.

All the time on each other neither one of us knew
Both of us were unaware or ignorant of each other's state of mind, emotions, or intentions.

Feels like we've been falling forever like a satellite
The feeling of spinning or spiraling out of control or falling without end.

Set floating there in orthogonal orbit
Being suspended or levitating in a perpendicular orbit, suggesting detachment or disorientation.

Learned to stop commiserating
Learned to stop sharing mutual feelings of grief or distress.

Learned to stop equivocating
Learned to stop being indecisive or ambiguous in communication or actions.

Learned to rely on our relying on anaphora
Learned to depend on repeating or emphasizing certain phrases, suggesting a need for structure or repetition.

With "haiku-like imagination"
With a creative or imaginative approach inspired by haiku poetry.

Almost missed the view from the window
Almost overlooked or failed to appreciate the simple things or beauty in life.

Woke up at midnight, headlights rolling over
Waking up suddenly to the sound or sight of car headlights, suggesting anxiety or disturbance.

Said there was something so important that it couldn't wait
Claimed or believed that there was an urgent or crucial matter that needed to be addressed or expressed.

Said you were watching but you couldn't shoulder it now
Admitted that you were aware of a situation or responsibility, but currently unable or unwilling to manage it.

We learned to stop staring at the door
We stopped being fixated or consumed by the prospect of escape or change.

We learned to stop wondering if we could still escape it anymore
We stopped questioning or doubting our ability to escape or change our circumstances.

Everyone saw, I know, I know
Everyone was aware or witnessed the situation, acknowledging the shared experience.

The blank frames on your bookshelf
Empty or unfinished parts of one's life or personality, manifested physically as blank frames on a bookshelf.

Everyone felt better then
Everyone experienced a sense of relief or improvement in the situation or in oneself.

(I won't, I won't)
(a repeated phrase or response)

There was a place we both said we'd meet if we fall too far apart
There was an agreement or plan to reunite or reconcile if the relationship or connection deteriorates.

So we sit still staring at the floor
We remain stationary and avoidant, staring at the ground or surface.

So we sit still hoping that we'll actually do what we learned we should do
We remain still, hoping that we will follow through on the lessons or wisdom we've learned.

And that either of us will find someplace to start
And that one or both of us will take action or initiative to improve the situation or relationship.