Are 'mice' Electric
Ivor Biggun Lyrics

Hello children, how do you do?
Ivor Biggun greets the listeners and introduces his singing mice.

I've brought some friends to sing for you
Ivor Biggun has brought his singing mice to entertain the listeners.

Mein singing mice I've brought along
Ivor Biggun has brought his singing mice to perform a song for the audience.

To sing ein little mousey song
The singing mice are going to perform a song about mice.

So mein mouses don't be slow
Ivor Biggun encourages his singing mice to start singing without delay.

Sing along und here we go
Ivor Biggun asks the audience to join in and listen to the song.

Can little mousey pull ze pud'
A provocative question about the sexual abilities of mice.

Yes we can it does us good
The mice can indeed engage in sexual behavior, which benefits them.

Do little mice have tiny dongs
Another provocative and vulgar question about the anatomy of mice.

Yes they're only one inch long
The male mice have a penis that is one inch long.

Zat's not much to wave about
The small size of the mice's penises is not impressive.

It's more than you, you daft old c*nt
Ivor Biggun insults someone off-stage with vulgar language.

Stick to ze script boys
Ivor Biggun reminds the singing mice to follow the lyrics of the song and not to improvise.

Why do mouseys sing so high
A question about the mice's high-pitched singing voice.

'Cause we're so fucking sore, that's why
The mice claim that their high-pitched singing is the result of being sore or in discomfort.

Is it just 'cause you're so small
Ivor Biggun asks if the mice's high-pitched singing is due to their small size.

Yes we all have ... balls
The mice claim that they all have testicles despite their small size.

Would you like to meet mein cat
Ivor Biggun offers to introduce his cat to the audience.

No fuck off you silly old twat
Ivor Biggun dismisses the idea of introducing his cat with vulgar language.

Now zen boys, you'll never be as famous as Punky and Porky if you keep swearing
Ivor Biggun warns the singing mice that they won't achieve fame if they continue to use vulgar language.

What do mouseys love to eat
A question about the dietary habits of mice.

Spotted dick and shredded wheat
The singing mice claim to enjoy eating Spotted Dick and Shredded Wheat.

In the pantry no-one sees
The mice sneak into the pantry to eat without being caught.

We piss in the jam and crap on the cheese
The mice claim to urinate in jam and defecate on cheese as an act of rebellion against humans.

Now zen boys that's quite enough
Ivor Biggun tells the singing mice to stop using vulgar language and inappropriate behavior.

Oh fuck off you dozy old poof
The singing mice continue to use vulgar language and insult Ivor Biggun.

I'm beginning to lose mein temper!
Ivor Biggun is getting angry and frustrated with the singing mice.

Up your arse you ... old git
The singing mice continue to insult Ivor Biggun with vulgar language.

We'll fill your larder up with shit
The mice threaten to contaminate Ivor Biggun's food with feces.

We'll fight and fart and do as we please
The mice plan to engage in disruptive behavior such as fighting and farting.

We'll fuck in the bread-bin and steal your cheese
The mice claim that they will have sexual intercourse in Ivor Biggun's bread bin and steal his cheese.

Scnitzel I am a silly goose
A nonsensical statement by Ivor Biggun.

Mein pussycat has just got loose...
Ivor Biggun's cat has escaped and is no longer under his control.

Go cat go! There is your favourite food... mouseburger
Ivor Biggun encourages his cat to eat the singing mice, implying that they are like burgers made from mice.

Auf wiedersehn children if you please
Ivor Biggun says goodbye to the audience in German.

And as for the mouseys, hard cheese
Ivor Biggun makes a pun in which 'hard cheese' means 'tough luck' for the singing mice who are now in danger from the cat.