20 Years Ago
Jeffrey Steele Lyrics
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I?d pick a fight just to pick a fight
He said black, I said white
If he took one side I took the other side
Dinner table we sat around was
More like a battleground
Where I lost more times than I won
He was always preachin' about his past
I just kept screamin?, "Come on, dad"
That was 20 years ago, you don?t know me at all
Trying to talk to you is like talking to a wall
Yea, you gave me my life but it's my life to live
And maybe I don?t wanna live it like you did
20 years ago
He was built from blue collar sweat and blood
Square jaw and a crew cut, a purple heart, a Viet vet
And he?d tell you every chance he?d get
Always runnin? down my rock & roll
My friends, my hair and my clothes
Till it all got out of control
And one night it finally came to blows
That was just enough to get me gone
I couldn?t wait to prove him wrong
20 years ago I struck out on my own
He couldn?t tell me nothin'
I didn?t already know
Yea I was on my way
So what the hell did I care
With my old man and his gray hair
Thought about the road I chose
20 years ago
I left as fast as the leaves fell that autumn
I never looked back and I never once called him
But every time I talked to Momma
I wondered if he was there or if he even cared
I figured I walked out on him and the course of our love
Had run, Momma said, "No, no, you listen to me, Son
He?s a stubborn man and he won?t give in
He believes what he believes and you?re just like him"
And I could tell by her voice
There was something wrong
She broke down and said
"He ain?t got long"
So I caught the next plane home
Thought about all the years gone
And how my pride had let so much time go by
Ran up those stairs and I stood by his bed and cried
20 years ago I thought I knew it all
But tryin' to talk to me is like talking to a wall
Yea, thought I was a man but actin? like I did
But all I want right now is just to be your kid
And just before my dad gave up the ghost
He took my hand and said, "Son, let it go
That was 20 years ago, 20 years ago"
Jeffrey Steele's "20 Years Ago" is a poignant song about a young man's strained relationship with his father. The lyrics paint a picture of a rebellious attitude and a constant clash of viewpoints which led to a rift in their relationship. The song has two distinct parts; the first half reflects on the singer's past struggles to come to terms with his father's stern beliefs, while the second half is an emotional and heart-wrenching account of the singer's cathartic visit to his father's deathbed.
The singer is reflective of his rebellious past and acknowledges his mistakes. He was at a difficult stage in his life and would often get into arguments with his father, even on trivial topics. He reminisces about how dinner tables at home, where they should have shared moments of bonding, would turn into battlegrounds, as they would constantly fight. The singer also regrets the fact that he did not respect his father's past experiences and would often shut him down when he spoke about them. Though in retrospect, he recognizes his flaws and wishes he could have done things differently.
The tone of the song shifts in the final verse when the singer gets a call from his mother, informing him that his father is dying. Steele beautifully captures the emotions of a son who wants to make amends with his father as he grows old, acknowledging that his father may have been right about him all along. The song ends with the singer stating that his father's words finally hit home, accepting that it was all in the past, and he needed to let it go. The song touches on universal themes like the importance of relationships, the need for forgiveness, and the inevitability of passing time.
Line by Line Meaning
I was at that smart ass time of my life
I was young and thought I was smarter than everyone else.
I'd pick a fight just to pick a fight
I would argue with others even if I didn't actually disagree with them.
He said black, I said white
If he had an opinion, I would take the opposite stance.
If he took one side I took the other side
I was always disagreeing with my dad and taking the opposite stance to make a point.
Dinner table we sat around was
The dinner table was the place where we would argue the most.
More like a battleground
The dinner table was always filled with tension and arguments.
Where I lost more times than I won
I would argue a lot with my dad, but he usually won the argument.
Wouldn't learn till later on
I didn't realize how wrong I was until later in my life.
He was always preachin' about his past
My dad would often talk about his past experiences and use them to make a point.
I just kept screamin', 'Come on, dad'
I didn't want to listen to my dad's stories or advice and would often get frustrated with him.
That was 20 years ago, you don't know me at all
My dad didn't understand how I had changed over the years.
Trying to talk to you is like talking to a wall
My dad wouldn't listen to me or understand my point of view.
Yea, you gave me my life but it's my life to live
My dad provided me with a life, but I wanted to live it my own way.
And maybe I don't wanna live it like you did
I didn't want to follow in my dad's footsteps and live the way he did.
He was built from blue collar sweat and blood
My dad was a hard worker who worked in manual labor jobs.
Square jaw and a crew cut, a purple heart, a Viet vet
My dad was a veteran of the Vietnam War and had a very masculine look.
And he'd tell you every chance he'd get
My dad would talk about his war experiences often.
Always runnin' down my rock & roll
My dad didn't like my taste in music.
My friends, my hair and my clothes
My dad didn't like my friends or my style.
Till it all got out of control
Our arguments became too intense and we couldn't see eye-to-eye.
And one night it finally came to blows
We had a physical fight one night.
That was just enough to get me gone
I left home after our fight.
I couldn't wait to prove him wrong
I wanted to prove my dad wrong and show him that I could make something of myself despite our differences.
20 years ago I struck out on my own
I left home to start my own life.
He couldn't tell me nothin'
I didn't want to listen to my dad's advice or guidance.
I didn't already know
I felt like I already knew everything I needed to know about life.
Yea I was on my way
I was excited to start my new life and was confident in my abilities.
So what the hell did I care
I didn't care what my dad thought about me or my decisions.
With my old man and his gray hair
I saw my dad as old-fashioned and outdated.
Thought about the road I chose
I reflected on my decision to leave home and start a new life.
I never looked back and I never once called him
I didn't keep in touch with my dad after I left home.
But every time I talked to Momma
I still talked to my mom, but not my dad.
I wondered if he was there or if he even cared
I doubted whether my dad cared about me and my life.
I figured I walked out on him and the course of our love
I thought I had ruined my relationship with my dad by leaving home.
Had run, Momma said, 'No, no, you listen to me, Son
My mom disagreed and told me to listen to her.
He's a stubborn man and he won't give in
My dad is stubborn and won't change his beliefs or opinions.
He believes what he believes and you're just like him'
My mom told me I was just as stubborn as my dad and we were alike.
And I could tell by her voice
I could hear the pain in my mom's voice.
There was something wrong
I knew something was wrong with my dad.
She broke down and said
My mom cried and told me the truth.
'He ain't got long'
My dad was dying.
So I caught the next plane home
I went home to see my dad as soon as I could.
Thought about all the years gone
I realized how much time had passed since I left home.
And how my pride had let so much time go by
I regretted letting my pride keep me from talking to my dad for so long.
Ran up those stairs and I stood by his bed and cried
I went upstairs to see my dad and couldn't keep from crying.
20 years ago I thought I knew it all
I was young and foolish and thought I knew everything.
But tryin' to talk to me is like talking to a wall
My dad had a hard time talking to me because I wouldn't listen.
Yea, thought I was a man but actin' like I did
I thought I was a mature adult, but my behavior said otherwise.
But all I want right now is just to be your kid
I just wanted my dad to accept me and love me for who I am.
And just before my dad gave up the ghost
My dad died shortly after we talked.
He took my hand and said, 'Son, let it go
My dad forgave me and told me to forget the past.
That was 20 years ago, 20 years ago'
My dad realized that we both made mistakes 20 years ago.
Contributed by Xavier E. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
@BillyHurst
Thank you so much for sharing this with us. It’s always been one of my favorites.
@garymiller7760
Thank you Jeffrey Steele. You are the sound track to our life. Thank you. Gary and Jess Miller
@DonaldcordleJrScarlettECordle
thanks my friend !!! my dad died his last night in vietnam i was 6 months old he switched partrols with a fellow soldier that night so he would be home for christmas to be with his son and daughter for christmas, he caught a bullet on 12-18-1970,, i look up everyday!! not long ago i caught a pick you threw in to the crowd and i play every night with it hoping i can put together a song, im in ashland city and would love to sit and write with you on day, it would be a dream come true
@billiemitchell73
♥ your music....
@robertkovacs5177
great song and story brother 🍻
@kellymack9969
Come to Idaho brotha
@donnahensel7211
If you're in town Saturday, swing by CHUKKERS FOR CHARITY and support Saddle Up with us! I've seen miracles personally putting those kids up on horses. Phenomenal.
@joshuabedwell341
I love this song can u send me the cd
@dennisterrell9763
Cool song. I like your . Jsic Had my own , rock and, my Brother was my bass player got cancelled and 6 m. Died. Still love writing singing playing . Didn't realize I should have done sooner loved love showsI'63 now. I was adopted by my blood Mother's Sister didn't know till my adopted D blew his head off when I was 12 found out my Blood mother and brother was my Aunt And my Cousin. Fell in love with both . Then heart ripped out both Died and around when Dog was splattered on street cries out to God showed me my sdog relaxing a field with two lions , three foot my Dog turns looks at me and Moms face zooms in out ofa cloudy frequency with a glow in her face I'll never forget. ,guess what I'm saying I love Music like you and getting to know my blood brother and Jam with him , we were getting noticed .Even at 63 would love havea good time playing in front of people just didn't realize I could make money doing something I loved earlier, later bro I learned Songs just watching you. Your So creative.
@dennisterrell9763
I like your version of What hurts the most. Great Song. Better than what stain did. Good vocals.