Jason DeFord grew up in Nashville, Tennessee, in the southside community of Antioch.
Jelly Roll's 2010 collaboration "Pop Another Pill" with Memphis rapper Lil Wyte reached over 6.3 millions YouTube views. This song led to the album Year Round by the hip-hop group SNO, released on the Hypnotize Minds label in April 2011 and produced by DJ Paul and Juicy J. SNO's song "Come Here White Girl" was named among "The 10 Most Memorable White Rapper Collaborations" by XXL.
Jelly Roll released many mixtapes including the Gamblin' on a Whiteboy series and the Therapeutic Music series. His independently released debut solo studio album The Big Sal Story was released on October 26, 2012. He released two collaborative albums with Haystak, two collaborative albums with Lil Wyte, four collaborative albums with Struggle Jennings and one album under the group SNO with Lil Wyte and BPZ.
Jelly Roll's 2013 mixtape Whiskey, Weed, & Women was originally named Whiskey, Weed, & Waffle House, but was later changed after the restaurant threatened legal action over the use of their name and logo on the cover. The replacement cover featured a "cease and desist" stamp in place of the Waffle House logo.
Only
Jelly Roll Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
What if the drugs in my system have finally taken a toll?
What if I bleed? The whole world will see my heart
Lord, what I need? Have mercy on me, please God
I don't wanna wake up
I'm living in a dream right now
Only place I ain't a fuck up
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I only feel right, said I only feel right
What if the darkness inside of me's finally taken my soul?
What if the angels in heaven were sent to take me home?
Would they fight through the demons that I have in my life?
Lord, I'm believing, eventually see the light
I don't wanna wake up
I'm living in a dream right now
Only place I ain't a fuck up
Only place for me to be right now
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I only feel right, said I only feel right
What if the moon disappears and the sun doesn't light up the sky?
What if the freedom we're seeking is only inside of our mind?
What if I love? What if I give my all?
Lord up above, will she catch me when I fall?
I don't wanna wake up
I'm living in a dream right now
Only place I ain't a fuck up
Only place for me to be right now
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I only feel right, said I only feel right
Jelly Roll's song "Only" is a reflection of his internal struggles with addiction, the fear of failure, and the search for something genuine. The opening lyrics "What if the love that I'm missing is finally taking control? / What if the drugs in my system have finally taken a toll?" presents a dichotomy of feeling lost and seeking something to hold onto while struggling with addiction. The chorus, "I only feel right when I'm doing wrong," suggests that the character chooses the path of self-sabotage to feel alive and in control of their life instead of confronting the root of the problem. The song presents a sense of apprehension and uncertainty about the future, with lyrics such as "What if the darkness inside of me's finally taken my soul?" and "What if the moon disappears and the sun doesn't light up the sky?"
In the final verse, the character confronts themselves with the possibility that the freedom they seek is only inside their mind, and asks for divine intervention while risking it all for love. The lyrics "What if I love? What if I give my all? / Lord up above, will she catch me when I fall?" suggest that the character has a desire to connect with somebody genuinely, but is afraid to put themselves out there.
Overall, "Only" explores deep and complex themes of addiction, fear, and finding a sense of belonging, all while confronting oneself in the process.
Line by Line Meaning
What if the love that I'm missing is finally taking control?
I wonder if my need for love has finally become too powerful to ignore.
What if the drugs in my system have finally taken a toll?
I wonder if the harmful effects of the drugs I've been taking have finally caught up with me.
What if I bleed? The whole world will see my heart
I fear that if I am vulnerable, everyone will see my emotions.
Lord, what I need? Have mercy on me, please God
I'm searching for guidance and begging for divine intervention.
I don't wanna wake up
I don't want to face reality.
I'm living in a dream right now
I'm detached from what's real.
Only place I ain't a fuck up
The only place I feel successful is in my own head.
Only place for me to be right now
I feel like my current situation is the only way I can find peace.
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
I feel most comfortable when I'm acting recklessly.
said I only feel right
I firmly believe that my self-destructive behaviors are the only way I can feel any sort of contentment.
What if the darkness inside of me's finally taken my soul?
I worry that my inner demons have consumed me.
What if the angels in heaven were sent to take me home?
I wonder if my time on Earth is up and it's my turn to leave.
Would they fight through the demons that I have in my life?
I question if the forces of good would be able to overcome the negative forces in my life.
Lord, I'm believing, eventually see the light
I still have faith that things will get better.
What if the moon disappears and the sun doesn't light up the sky?
I fear that the world I know could just cease to exist.
What if the freedom we're seeking is only inside of our mind?
I consider whether the true freedom can only be found through our own thoughts.
What if I love? What if I give my all?
I'm curious what might happen if I let my guard down and give my all in a relationship.
Lord up above, will she catch me when I fall?
I'm putting my faith in a higher power to protect me when I inevitably stumble.
I don't wanna wake up
I continue to avoid reality.
I'm living in a dream right now
I'm still detached from the truth.
Only place I ain't a fuck up
My thoughts are the only place where I don't feel like a failure.
Only place for me to be right now
I still believe that this scenario is the only way for me to find solace.
I only feel right when I'm doing wrong
My reckless actions continue to be the source of my comfort.
said I only feel right
I'm still convinced that my self-destructive behaviors are my only option for happiness.
Lyrics © BMG Rights Management
Written by: Jason DeFord
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
@oktoberina
He’s said in many different ways that he understands what that is simply because it’s what he was for so long…and is just now starting to see that’s not where he has to be forever.
Just like you.
And me.
And I’d imagine most, if not all, of those who connect with his lyrics/music.
He didn’t name one of his albums Ballads of the Broken for no reason ya know?
He calls it therapeutic music also for a reason.
I wish you all the best and I hope that you continue to fight the demon that tells you that you aren’t good enough.
It’s a hard place to be when you finally realize that the demon you’re fighting is actually you.
Trust me, I know.
@joshlovsbball
Anyone like this version better than the studios?
@KRose86
By far tbh.
@MickeyD713
Hell yeah both of them
@CR-mc9hl
Way better, Glitter ✨ too
@shortycanteven4460
Sooooo much better, his videos don't do his voice justice!
@jonreeder1419
I can’t listen to the studio version but I have been listening to the one an jelly roll sents 2014 And he has a lifetime fan and brother that can relate to his pain and struggles throughout his hard life I did not think I could find an artist That could sing and rap exactly what I feel and He has your number one friend for life
@tinastucke9516
I was addicted to pills for 15 years. November 30th I will be clean 8 years. My husband who passed away last year was the only person who could make me see where I was going to end up. Please stay strong and dont stop believing you can get clean.
@patricklane2295
Congratulations keep it up, proud of u 💪🙌
@lytess360
AWESOME job getting and staying clean! My apologies for your late husband. Always remember that our lives carry so much more meaning as we stay clean. The memories we create are ones we can barely remember when we’re on drugs. Never stop believing in yourself
🤍🖤❤️💛
@handsomerob4258
I was on the very edge of pushing the self destruct button this morning after a relapse this past week. I almost walked away from everything I have destroyed through my addiction. I asked the universe for an answer, and out of nowhere a job offer with living arrangements lands in my lap from the guy who played "If these tears vould talk". I feel like this man saw into my soul and put my pain into words. Hope isnt out of my reach and i will forever be thankful for finding Jelly Roll.